1 Teaser

"Candidate 205, please introduce yourself to his majesty."

I yawned as I stood behind the 205th candidate. The other 205 candidates stood on either side of the large imperial entryway. The ceiling seemed to create a sky on its own from how high it is.

The hairpins which held my hair up began to weigh down on my head causing me to have a headache. The robes which I wore were tightened so tightly that I felt like a mouse being coiled around by a snake.

I was a second away from turning and walking out of the large red door at the end of the room. My eyes wandered over to look at the object of my misery and pain.

His golden eyes were framed by thick and long, black eyelashes. His longer than what should be acceptable, black hair was tied back with golden hairpins. The Golden robes which he wore not only showed the wealth of the man but amplified his authority as the emperor of the whole damn empire.

I yawned once more only to hear someone clear their throat. I turned to see one of the candidates shake her head. I frowned and quickly flipped her off. She glared at my vulgar action but I just turned my head away from her.

You may ask what all of these women are candidates for.

Well we are all here so that the fucking emperor over there who's sitting in his ass would choose one of us to be the empress. Frankly I don't want to be chosen. I chuckle as I remember all the things I had done so that I would be eliminated from the candidacy.

Purposefully messing up the embroidery, making the tea too bitter, tripping during the dance, and playing a rock song on the lute.

I sighed. My BL novels are waiting for me back home. I need to find a way to get back home ASAP.

For your information, as you could already tell, I am not from this time.

Instead I am a college student from modern-day New York City.

Is this is an Isekai story?

Damn straight it is.

Has this theme been overused?

Yes.

Are we still going to use it?

Probably.

"Next candidate!"

The 205th candidate ran past me with her face full of tears. Her black eyeliner running down her pale face. The only thing I felt for her as the door closed behind her was pity.

Not for her but for the maids who did all the makeup in the morning. All of that effort only for the girl to ruin it with her baby tears. I yawned once more before stretching. This shit was dragging on for too long.

So far the excuse of an emperor has only chosen ten of the 206 candidates. Like hell is he going to choose me as the eleventh. I stretched my hand up and scratched the top of my head.

"FUCK!"

The whole room fell silent immediately. I felt my face flush as I bent down and picked up the hairpin which fell out of my hair after scratching it. I was too scared to lift my face. I did not want to see the other perfect ladies snicker at me.

Wait?

Am I actually giving a damn to these bitches?

Ha!

"NEXT CANDIDATE!!"

I cupped my ears.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm not deaf dumbass."

The enunch glared at me as I walked over. I then knelt on the ground and placed my forehead on the ground.

"I Li Na Xi introduce myself to his majesty."

I then sat up and brushed the dust off of my knees.

"WHO THE HELL TOLD YOU TO STAND UP? HOW DARE YOU BE SO INSOLENT IN THE PRESENCE OF HIS MAJESTY?"

I yawned once more before itching the back of my ear.

"Look Mr. Enunch sir. I can stand up if I fucking want to. If you want to execute me as a result, then be my guest. I would like to be reincarnated as something funner next time like a butterfly."

The enunch raised his hand to slap me but I dodged his slap. I then raised my hand and slapped him across the face. I then smirked and cracked my knuckles as I said.

"WELL, WELL, the enunch has the audacity to slap me! Guess what oldie, I'm not one of those shaking bitches over there. The next time you try to touch me I swear to god that I will cut off your nonexistent dick."

The room quieted once more. I sighed then rubbed my forehead. This was getting way more out of hand than I had expected. If I'm lucky I will actually only be executed and not whipped before that.

But to be honest I've gotten this far, so why not let it all out before I'm executed?

I then turned to the emperor whose golden eyes burned with rage at my performance.

"Look Emperor Wang Fei-"

"HOW INSOLENT YOU DARE MAKE A MISTAKE OF THE GREAT EMPEROR WANG FANG'S NAME?"

I turned to the enunch.

"Could you just like shut up for a second?"

I then turned back to the emperor.

"Emperor Wang Wei-"

"WANG FANG! HOW IS THAT SO HARD TO REMEMBER?"

I cleared my throat.

"Emperor Zhang Wei-"

"HOW THE HELL ARE YOU GETTING EVEN FARTHER AWAY FROM HIS NAME?"

To be honest I knew his name but teasing this enunch was way too fun. If I was going to die I might as well give this guy high blood pressure and possibly a heart attack before doing so. If I'm dying you're coming with me to hell motherfucker!

"Emperor Wei Fang-"

"Just skip my name."

I get my heart skip a beat for a second. Holy shit. This man's voice was perfection. It wasn't that deep but just deep enough to be attractive. It had the perfect mix of melody and honey to it. I hate the man but his voice sure is a positive.

"Okay, in that case emperor, I apologize but before I leave I would like to say one thing."

The emperor nodded as he rested his cheek on his hand. His guards looked like they were ready to pounce on me, but not as much as the enunch in the corner.

I took a deep breath before saying.

"I understand that I will be eliminated as a candidate and as a result I wanted say one thing. And that is....I'm sorry dude but you just piss me off. Like you aren't ugly or anything but your face just pisses me off. And that hairdo of yours, what the fuck is that? If the enunch over there didn't introduce you earlier I would've thought that you were one of the candidates. Like cut your hair short for God's sake! It's summer yet you have a mane! Also, why the hell are you being so choosy? All of these women busted their asses for days if not for years of their lives so that you would look at them. But all you've been doing is making them cry with a single sentence of yours. If that isn't narcissistic and stupid then I don't know what is. To be honest even if you were going to choose me as your concubine I would reject. I don't want to spend the rest of my life with someone as annoying as you after all. I would rather sleep with the enunch over there than spend the night with you."

I then bowed before saying.

"Thank you for the opportunity and I hope you have a nice life. Goodbye and I hope that I never see you again."

I then turned on my heel and walked towards the large door at the end of the room. I felt the stares of the candidates as I placed my hand on the door handle. A second later a dagger placed itself near my hand. I flinched as I felt someone's breath tickle my ear.

"Where do you think you're going, candidate 206? You think that I would let you leave here after all that you've said to me?"

I turned to see the emperor's golden eyes gleam. I bit my lip. I truly am screwed now.

......

Thank you so much for reading my luvs! Stay safe and stay tuned for more!❤️😍