{The Skele-Boys}

Author's announcement:

Ok guys, Nevermind about that <Bruh> chapter. I realized that webnovel is the only site where you can make a dxd harem ff with a beta MC who casually eats incel pills and god-awful grammar whilst still getting thousands of views in just a few minutes so I'm staying here.

But I'll still upload on the other sites so the chap release rate is gonna slow down for a little bit so that the other sites can catch up.

Don't worry this won't really make much of a difference considering I already upload super slow anyways.

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Chapter 5 – {The Skele-Boys}

{Ghoul's Pov}

Cardinal World, Vramus Forest.

Right, So the first step of my maximum efficiency method is to apply the "Force" schematic which increases the "weight" of a magicule unit which makes that unit "heavier" than the others.

The second step is applying an additional schematic that is the "Push" type. The function of this schematic is to give a unit the ability to be a physical barrier to the other units and "Push" them toward a certain desired direction.

Pretty simple right?

Anyways, I called the units who were applied the "Force" and "Push" schematics; Pusher-Types. Creative I know.

I then created several dozen pusher types with a straight-line formation and then…

"Move"

The TPs that were positioned behind the normal units accelerated themselves in their direction and when the TPs impacted the normal types…

"It 𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙠𝙚𝙙!" I shouted in pure joy.

The TPs had started pushing the normal units alongside them. This meant that he only needed to control the TPs when moving them instead of wasting mental concentration trying to control all of them.

𝙈𝙖𝙭𝙞𝙢𝙪𝙢 𝙀𝙛𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙮!

"Wooooooooh, I'm a fucking world-class genius! I'm sure nobody couldn't figure it out as fast as me without guidance ;>" I gleefully announced to the world.

[Yep, Only took like 18 hours… You really are special] Companion said sarcastically.

"Yeah, I am really special considering I got gifted with you," I said nonchalantly.

[Dunno, Man seems kinda gay to me] Companion stated jokingly.

"So you are a guy" It seems that another one of my many theories regarding Companion has been confirmed by the big man himself.

[I can be whatever you want daddy~] Companion suddenly said in a feminine voice.

"Stop that, I don't want a disembodied waifu," I said in distaste.

[Too bad cuz you're missing out on some free AIussy] Companion stated as he regressed back to his original androgynous voice.

"Oh Mahadeva-Boddhisatva-Jesus Christmas, Please I beg on your holy dried saggy balls to deliver me from this suspect AI" I immediately said without the slightest of hesitation when I heard Companion utter the word "AIussy".

[Not even Mr. Hoho Bloody Sinter Claws can get rid of me, Ghoul. After all, I always come back no matter what. I'm basically an annoying ex-botfriend]

"Now, This is what I call a Negative-Amazeballs moment :<," I said in a depressed tone.

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{Narrator's Pov}

Cardinal World, Vramus Forest

"Hey Glitterdust, It has been like what 12 years? since the last time we met, How's undeath been faring for you?" What seemed to be some sort of skeletal undead soldier wearing rusted chainmail armor said to another skeleton, although this one was wearing rather fancy sorcerous robes that looked brand new in comparison.

"Didn't I tell you long ago not to call me that? ;{" The skele-mage said with a pouting and angry look… At least that seemed to be what his skeletal face was trying its damn hardest to convey.

"Oh cmon now, I'm just reliving old memories of when were still joyous men living our happy lives," The skele-knight said.

"Hn. Whatever, for a skeleton who hasn't tasted anything since 69 years ago I'm actually doing pretty alright but… what is it that you that drove you to meet me again after such a long time, Brother?" Skele-mage asked.

"Well, It's about… I mean you can 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙞𝙩 too right?" Skele-knight answered with a question.

"About 𝙞𝙩? Yeah, I can feel it as well, That subtle yet intense miasmic aura that engulfed the western side of the forest is rattling my spine. Even now I can still feel it shaking me through the bones" Skele-mage responded while occasionally twitching and shaking.

"It must be from some powerful dark monster… But you coming here all of a sudden probably means that you want me to be there and meet that monster with you, Ain't that right?" Skele-mage questioned.

"Indeed, My one-and-only adviser <Destiny Intuition> told me that if I were to go stroll there and meet the origin of that vile aura it will benefit me as an undead tremendously. So, I came here to ask for you to accompany me in case things go south, Brother" Skele-knight said.

"Hmm…" The skele-mage hmmed in consideration.

"Should we really trust that skill? I mean the last time you told me to listen to it, We delved into the Arbal caverns with the rest of the squad because your skill said '𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙖𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙨 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙡𝙩 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙘𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙨 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙣 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙚𝙭𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚' then we met an Elder Lich, became his undead minions, while the rest of the united empire, you know the country 𝙬𝙚 were 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙙 to 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙘𝙩, got burned to ashes by the Dragonoid Demon Lord and that Chaos Dragon creature" Skele-mage complained.

"What are you talking about? The skill was technically still correct, wasn't it? Our souls didn't get eaten in The Destroyer's harvest festival and we became undead; An existence with eternal life that never tires, never hungers, and never fears" Skele-knight rebuked.

"We became 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨 even 𝙫𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙘𝙝𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨 of the abyss, How in the name of all that is unholy are you still so positive?! Because for me I would rather die!" Skele-mage shouted in a wrathful tone.

"I believe in the saying 'Your life would be so much better if you focus on the positive and stay determined', I think you should as well, Brother" Skele-knight argued confidently.

"But we're not even alive anymore, Brother," Skele-mage said with a frustrated and 'As-a-matter-of-fact' tone that nerd faces usually use in their daily life.

"Not with that attitude, You're not going to," Skele-knight said.

"We have nothing to live for now, We are vile undead that even the lady of death hates, The world hates our bones and sends holy paladins to slay, Not even our fellow monster-kin are friendly, We don't have any other purpose but to be the world's festering cancer. But… I don't want to undie like that Brother, I want me and you and all the other undead to have a glorious purpose, To live, To feel, And to die with actual meaning" Skele-knight stated.

"But how are we supposed to find meaning and purpose if we don't take risks like these? So brother, Come with me and let's find our purpose together in this once-in-a-century encounter, If we die then we die, I would not reject lady death after such a long time after all" Skele-knight proposed.

"Well… Alright then, I don't really have anything else to do anyways, So I might as well join" Skele-mage grumbled with a reluctant but secretly happy tone.

After that conversation, Skele-mage and Skele-knight made their way across the forest while gathering their old comrades (Who were also undead skele-boys now) from the united empire.

Notable members of the skele-squad would be:

- Skele-archer

- Skele-ranger

-Skele-Squire

-Skele-Healer

-Skele-Rouge

-Skeletor the lich, Who also agreed to join on the condition that he didn't have to participate in battle if things go south.

Eventually, The gathering of Skele-Boys reached a peculiar waterfall with what seemed to be a hidden cave behind it.

They had reached Ghoul's residence…

And inside they saw a mentally deranged Ghoul who radiated an aura of pure darkness… talking to himself and insulting the voices in his head.

But, How would our titular nameless Ghoul react to the sudden appearance of a bunch of skele-boys rolling up in his house?

Would he be Mad? Surprised? Sad? Happy? Confused? Or Aroused?

Find out in the next episode of Dragon Testicles!

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Anyways that's it, I will now start uploading chapters at a slower rate so that TCFU on other sites can catch up. Because apparently, It does wonders to the algorithm if you upload overtime instead of releasing all chaps all at once.

Fun fact: Male Killer whales occasionally have non-consensual group/gang sex with lone dolphins, The dolphins also don't have to be male… or even an adult.

Word count: 1499 (New record!)