2 KIM - How to realize your sister's been dating an idiot

For some reason, Amy was annoyed. Don't ask me why. Spoiler alert: the twins' telepathy stuff... doesn't work. Not even a bit. I tried once or twice and I was deeply depressed by the result. Even if it was predictable.

Well, actually, I can probably guess what my sister was mad about. One, she had to check up on me. Two, her romance book - which, by the way, wasn't as bad as I first believed it would be - was... um... well basically soaked. By whom, I don't know. Certainly not our dog that someone took to the beach when she wasn't supposed to. Nope, not the dog. Three, while she was checking on me, her boyfriend was whispering things in the ear of a tall and very pretty Afro-American that came either from NY or from San Francisco.

If there's one thing my sister hates more than bad romance books, it's love competition. Or Peg, the dog because she loves me more than her. My sister might change of boyfriend every semester, but once she is with a guy, he's hers. Nobody else gets to put his hands on him. Or talk to him for too long. Or get his attention. Except if your called Kim. Then you can because you're usually the one that solves the sweet, tragic and constant problems of the "Amy + X = love️" couple.

I actually also hate it when my sister thinks she has love competition. The truth is, how can she even get competition? Nobody can fight against what she's got: perfectly tanned skin (our only common point), small and pulpy lips, huge eyes, long silky black hair... Irresistible. Funny how she gets so much boy attention. Nobody could guess why.

Let's go back to the actual problem. We were on the best (and quite crowded) beach of Hawaii, almost sunset, I had a wonderful pistachio ice cream in the hand and I was calmly walking alongside the water. My parents had gone home but we had the scooter and I could stroll with my friends. At that point, this evening was perfect, absolutely perfect.

At that point. Because right then, my sister yelled. Not on me for a change but on Miss NY. Who had casually put an arm around Mr. Boyfriend (which name is Steve by the way) and was dangerously approaching her lips from his. Well, until she received the octopus on her face. Best part of Hawaii: weird things stroll on the beach alongside you - crabs, seaweed, seagulls, huge water snakes and spiders - and no kid is afraid of touching them and throwing them at whatever annoys them. No scaredy cat on this island.

Except, of course, the tourists. Like Miss Tourist. Who shrieked, threw the slimy animal and was ready to jump on it. But, at that point, Amy was even madder because Steve was trying to calm San Francisco girl. She yelled on him until our ears were ringing because of the high-pitched screams. Super model tourist looked incredibly offended and was yelling about never coming back to this stupid-island-covered-with-hysterics and how much money we were going to lose because of her departure. Which made us all laugh since she was only one of the hundred thousand tourists we get every freaking month.

She walked out very angrily, almost trying to drag Steve, but Amy was firmly attached to him, still yelling. Result: Tourist lost and not honorably. And Amanda calmed down a lot until Mr. Boyfriend said the one unpardonable thing.

"Chill Amy! You're getting nuts. Kim's way more relaxing. I think I'll go take a stroll with her while you calm."

I could smell the anger of Amanda. I could see it. A shadowy milky white tentacle coming right at me. I could feel it strangling me from distance. Carrying me off the ground. Pushing me very very far away.

Weirdly, I felt nauseous. I couldn't see anything anymore. My ears were popping every second. The wind was slicing at me in every place. I couldn't feel the ground under my feet.

I closed my eyes. At that point, it felt like the best thing I had done in a while.

I though Shit, there's goes my life.

Guess I was right.

Because, when I opened them again, I was falling straight into the volcano.