2 Killing A Boar!!! The Birth Of The Name BallsDeep69
Danny Hudson slowly opened his eyes after what felt like a long time. The first thing he noticed was the color blue, the color of the vast sky that stretched out as far as the eye can see, something so majestic and beautiful.
"I fucking hate the sky," Danny muttered as he sat up, running his hands through his putch black hair. "Whenever its clear its just so....blue, like its mocking me." He gazed at the sky for a few more moments before takijg the chance to look around.
He was currently sitting on a grassy plain, a plain that, like the sky, spanned on as far as the eye could see with numerous green hills. Besides the grass there really wasnt many other things to see so Danny with his short attention span quickly grew bored and stopped watching it.
"Okay, so lets get to work, the faster I do this the better it'll be for everyone....well mainly for me." Danny reached out his right hand and swiped down. A holographic list appeared in front of him similar to a menu in a game. Though he had never played the game before, Danny knew exactly how to access the menu.
"Okay, now lets see what we got in my inventory, better have some good shit." Danny clicked on the [Items] option bar, hoping that the voice had actually done something useful and provided him with some useful starter gear.
He found three things in the inventory and they were definitely starter weapons but it didnt really make Danny any happier as he clicked on all three of them for more information.
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[Iron Sword] +5 Strength
A starter weapon used by beginning adventurers! Though useful against weaker monsters, it is not recommended for larger foes. You'd probably die after you tried swinging it at a miniboss or boss level character, so also recommended to NOT try it.
[Regular Shirt] +1 Physical Resistance
A shirt.....thats basically all it is, nothing more....why are you still here?
[Cheap Adidas From The Dollar Store] +4 Agility
Shoes that'll make it easier to run away in!! Suited for beginning adventurers for when they flee in terror. Highly recommended to wear since you fall into this category.
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Danny wasnt sure whether to be pissed off or amused at the games apparent sense of humor so he simply equipped all of them. The objects appeared on him with a small sound making it super convenient.
"Well at least this game knows how lazy gamers are." Danny said after glancing over himself. He didn't necessarily like how he looked but the avatar he currently had, in his personal opinion, couldn't hold a candle to his own original appearance or even that of Kazuto's.
"Next up, lets check up on my stats, see where we're starting from." Danny said as he tapped the [Stats] button that was located second from the top. A panel opened up and showed him all the numbers he was currently holding, a pretty abysmal sight that he was certainly not proud of.
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[Name] - Kirito
[Level] - 1
[Money] - Your Broke, Go On A Killing Spree
[Guild]- No Association
[Party] - Haha, You Got Nooo Friends
[Health Points] - 1000
[Strength]- 5 +5
[Agility] - 3 +4
[Endurance] -6
[Dexterity]-4
[Melee Resistance] - 7 +
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It looked as bad as he imagined it, after all he was a level one so it would be weird if stats were too high for a beginner. However there was one thing that bothered him and that was the magic stat.
"Wait, wait, wait," Danny exclaimed, clearly confused. "There was magic in SAO? When da fuck did this happen? This isnt Alfheim, I haven't made it to that Arc yet....I wanna talk to the script writer because this is pure bullshit."
He would've kept cursing except he heard a noise off to his left, a sort of snorting sound the pigs at the county fair would make when he tried to touch them. Apparently pigs could smell asshole and thats why they didn't let Danny touch them. At least thats what his friend had said.
Pulling out his Iron Sword from its sheath attached to his back, Danny spun around, prepared to face whatever monster had apeared before him. However instead of a deadly monster he was staring at pig, or a boar if you wanted to be specific.
"Oh, its just a Frenzy Boar," Danny said with a sigj of relief. Raising his blade just above his shoulder, the skill started to activate and the sword began to glow a bright white, a standard color for a weak sword. Planting his feet, Danny grinned over at the boar before. charging headfirst at it.
"You should feel honored to be my first kill you damned Arnold Ziffel." Danny shouted as he ran. "Now go and rot in hell." He continued running, slashing the pig across the side before skidding to a stop. "Now fade into oblivion."
Instead of disappearing however, the pig turned around, snorted and ran straight at him. Not expecting the pig to still be alive, Danny was unable to dodge the blow and was flung back onto the grass.
"What the literal fuck damn wannabe Piglet" Danny said as he rolled over and jumped to his feet. "Your lucky your only a bunch of ones and zeroes, because if you weren't Id simply grill your fat ass." He raised his sword again. "Lets go again and this time I'm ready."
The boar pawed at the ground and gave a snort, clearly ready to charge once again. Activating his sword skill again, Danny broke into a run, his cheap dollar store Adidas digging into the ground and helping him to move faster. The boar began to run as well, lowering its head to prepare to use its tusks.
"This time, your ass is mine." Danny said with a steel like resolve. "Prepare to meet your maker." This time instead slashing at his side like he had done last time, when they were inches apart, Danny used the boars tusks as a springboard and jumped up and over the pig. Before the giant piece of ham ran past, Danny slashed downwards at the back of its head.
"Now this time, make sure you stay down," Danny said as he landed on the ground. He turned around just in time to see the boar burst into tiny blue fragments. "I didnt mean to hurt you Porky pig but let be honest.....you just weren't on my level."
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[You Leveled Up]
[You Leveled Up]
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"Oh I leveled up twice? Just from killing Babe?" Dannt was a bit surprised that he had leveled up twice since it was considered the weakest monster in the game. He assumed he would only level up once but he wasnt about to complain about the extra level gain. "Anyways, lets check up on my stats now that I'm level 3."
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[Name] - Kirito
[Level] - 3
[Money] - 40 Col
[Guild]- No Association
[Party] - Haha, You Got Nooo Friends
[Health Points] - 4500
[Strength]- 12 +5
[Agility] - 13 +4
[Endurance] -10
[Dexterity]-10
[Melee Resistance] - 11 +1
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"Hmmm, I guess its pretty decent," Danny criticized as he closed it. "Its sure as hell better then when I first started a minute ago." He smiled and put the Iron Sword back into the sheath on his back.
"So what do I do now? Just fuck around until I get magically summoned into the town of beginnings?" Danny was actually planning to do just that when he heard a sound from far off in the distance.
Moving over to the other side of the hill he was on, Danny saw it. A guy was in the middle of fighting a Frenzy Boar and was having trouble from the looks of it. Just from the way the guy attacked and the lack of glowing from the sword he was wielding Danny could tell he was a newbie with no idea how to use a sword skill.
"Hey buddy, You need some help over there!!" Danny shouted as he watched the guy, who had bright red hair, barely dodge an attack from the boar. "You looking a little sloppy over there."
"A little help would be nice yeah," the redhead yelled back as he slashed down at the boar without using a sword skill. "If if wouldn't trouble you then please assist me with this damn pig."
"Use your sword skill, that might help." Danny shouted out helpfully. "Your current slashes aren't doing much damage without that skill."
"Okay and how am I supposed to do that?" the guy shot back, clearly a bit irritated at Danny.
"Just feel it I guess and then start slashing." Danny smiled a little, feeling like he was doing a great service.
"Oh thanks player's guide!!" The guy shouted back. "Thats so insightful it loops right back around to being stupid."
Sighing to himself, Danny picked up a rather large rock and began walking down the hillside at a slow pace, intentionally trying to make the guy mad. "Just watch me and learn how its done you wannabe Kenshin Himura." He pulled back his arm above his shoulder, activated his skill and threw it as hard as he could.
The rock sailed at bullet-like speed and slammed into the back of the pig. It was probably due to its already low HP, but the moment the rock connected, the boar exploded into numerous blue shards and disappeared.
"My god, I've stumbled across the most powerful weapon in the game." Danny said as he walked down the hill and stopped once he stood next to the rather annoyed looking redhead. "The Mithril Pebble of Pig-Smiting!!"
"Yeah how about no," The redhead responded, clearly bugged that the new arrival stole his kill. "I would thank you for the help had I not found you so irritating."
"Nice to meet you too...ummm," Danny looked up, noticing the name above his head for the first time. "BallsDeep69, my names Kirito or you can call me Danny.'
"Um," the guys face immediately changed from one of moderately ticked to high key embarassed. "That not my real name! The name is Klein. This isnt my real character, just something to dick around with until I get the hang of my game. I'll make my real character later."
"Oh, no I completely understand, except how do you know that you'll have time to even MAKE a new character?" Danny asked him with a laugh. "I think you should start getting used to your new name."
