67 [AT] Righteous Maniacal Anger...

[After Transition]

Right, so the option for revenge is strictly out of the question because it will turn my soul black and the Spectre will come back and reap it but that doesn't mean I can't serve out justice even if it isn't the kind of dark justice I want to dish out, this burning anger won't rest till I do something about the matron and the drug dealer and though this anger won't go away with their arrest it will at least be satisfied a little. I can't risk committing a sin until I've done a shit ton of good deeds (does doing good deeds just so you can eventually commit a sin count? Let's hope so because I can't handle being a goody two shoes forever) otherwise tall, dark and terrifying is gonna come and take my soul off of me which is why I've decided to go the Batman route and kick their asses (a small victory) before dumping them on the police with a fuck ton of evidence to make sure they never get out of prison (they literally grinder children into meat and fed it to people), I'm currently on the top of a rooftop a few streets down from the orphanage scoping out the place.

I've chosen this spot for a variety of reasons, it's far away enough for them not to be able to spot me and if people see me they won't connect me to the orphanage s few streets away, a normal human wouldn't be able to clearly see that far even with the orphanage being in their line of sight but I'm not an ordinary human, I'm a super, regenerating, spider powered handsome devil who can easily see that far. I'm standing at the edge of the building roof top with my hands leaning against the metal railing acting casual but I'm really focusing on the orphanage and its surroundings waiting to see the two people I hate most in the world and proceed with my non-sin committing plan. I'm watching the orphanage when I'm a bit befuddled when I see someone walk out of the alleyway across from the orphanage and lean against a lamppost, I can't see his face as he's not facing my direction and he has his had up but there's no mistake who it is, I watched him lean there for five years straight and I can't help but feel the rage bubble up within me, it's that fucking drug dealer...

I remember watching him and the matron for the past couple of weeks before the soul merge and I can remember the anger that I felt which seemed to burst from hell itself while watching them and I thought that because of the merge and the new memories that the hate would be somewhat dulled but it seems I was mistaken, I hate him just as much if not more than before ( I guess strong enough emotions stayed) and I haven't even seen his face yet and I still have the undeniable urge to jump leap down the street and smash him to pieces. And that's just the drug dealer, if the matron shows up then I don't know what I'm gonna do because the person I hate more in the world than anyone is that greedy old bitch, the drug dealer is just that, a drug dealer and he doesn't pretend to be anything other than what he is and I definitely want to kill him for what he did to me but the matron, there's a special place in hell for people like her, the things she..

It's at that moment that I see the front doors of the orphanage open and I realise why that piece of scum drug dealer had come to lean against the lamppost. I grit my teeth hard, so hard that I can practically feel my teeth being grinding to dust and I swear my clenched jaw broke though it was quickly healed and all because I saw her and more specifically what she was doing, she was leading a little five up year old child down the pathway to the street while pulling him by the arm and whispering her sweet little lies into his ears and my rage shoots up to heights I didn't even know I was capable of. This is why I hate her the most, she is a matron who is in charge of countless children who look to her for guidance and love and she takes that trust and she spits on it and tramples it to the floor all the while hiding a kindly facade and feeding them to the wolves which is why I hate her the most.

Betrayal is the worst emotion you can experience, you could be tortured, beaten, robbed or even duped out of everything you own but it could never compare to the pain and anger you feel from betrayal and that's because of the very simple fact that true betrayal can only be felt when you are betrayed by someone you fully trust or love which is what happened to me. I grew up in that orphanage (in this universe) and I was raised by her, she was the only adult in my life and the only person I trusted even if it was because she clothed and fed me (though she did it to the worst of her ability) and she was supposed to look after me but she turned me into a drug mule and even eventually shoved me through a meat grinder all for money and profit which is why I hate her even more than the drug dealer, because she betrayed me.

I watch as she looks on as the five year old child crosses the street and picks up a brown paper bag which the drug dealer dropped before scurrying off and all I can feel now is a cold fury the refuses to be quelled, I'm snapped out of my single minded focus on her by a strange warping sounds and when I look down I can see that the metal railing that I was holding onto has warped around my clenched and shaking fist. I quickly let go of the railing and spin around to the opposite side of the orphanage all the while panting heavily out of breath, that was close, I almost gave in to my anger and was about to jump towards her to end her life which would be a sin that would result in my soul being taken, I have no idea if 'An Eye For An Eye' would avail me of any wrong doing but I'm not willing to risk it. Even just standing here I know that she's is a few streets down behind my back still doing the same thing she did to me all this years ago but to a whole new batch of children and I can't help but feel that the sin would be worth it just to end her but I don't want my life and journey to end here because of a bitch like her, like hell in gonna die for her.

It's quite clear now that I can't take this matter into my own hands because I know that if I'm involved then I'm definitely going to kill the bitch matron and damn my soul and I just can't take that risk which means that I will have to get someone else to deal with them because I don't think I could live knowing that she and him were still alive doing the same old shit without consequences even if those consequences aren't necessarily death. Naturally my first thought is to contact Commissioner Gordon and hand over all the evidence I've collected to him and let him and the rest of the Gotham City Police Department take care of it but then I realise that that's a pipe dream and will never deal with the two pieces of shit.

An operation like this that has gone on since I was five which is approximately 13 years doesn't survive without inside help, they've got people inside the police force that tip them off and warn them if anyone is close to discovering them for which I'm sure those dirty cops get a nice little bit of spending money. I know that Commissioner James Gordon, detective Harvey Bullock and a few other officers are straight but I'm willing to bet that there are more dirty cops in Gotham then there are good which means I can't trust this to the police to handle.

It looks like I'm gonna be meeting the Bat soon after all...

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