55 Chapter 54 - The Main Man

---Wayne Manor, Later That Night---

"Hehe, you know you are really cute!!", Selena said with a hiccup.

"Yeah, like let me peel you out of that suit! I...I can give you a wicked buzz, and we can have all the...fun we want!", Ivy giggled.

Having gone a bit overboard with the drinking Ivy, Selena, Blackfire, and Maxima all tried to match Yu and Nemuri. Unfortunately for them the serum in Yu and Nemuri gave them too much of an edge. Several bottles in the four became tipsy, and by the tenth bottle they were utterly wasted.

"You have some big muscles handsome.", Blackfire said, "If you marry me I will make you a King!"

"Nonsense, he...he is marrying me and shall have the strongest offspring with my bloodline!", Maxima snapped, "You...you can be a Duchess, and...we can share him."

"You couldn't take me in a fight on my worst day!", Blackfire said.

"You...you want to fight!", Maxima hissed.

"Ladies...you are arguing with suits of armor.", I sighed getting Ivy and Selena in the house.

Currently the two women were arguing with sets of armor we had in the entryway, and they were making complete fools of themselves.

"Huh...no we aren't!", they slurred.

"Next time I am cutting you off, you two can barely walk straight.", I stated.

"Can we help you somehow?", Rumi and Raven asked.

"Unless you know how to make them sober instantly, no.", I sighed, "Go ahead, and head to your rooms I got them."

Nodding their heads everyone else went to their rooms. Carrying Maxima and Blackfire to their rooms, the two of them carried on arguing like they were in the room together. Tripping over the foot of their beds they plopped into the pillows, and kept talking. Closing their doors I went to help Ivy and Selena next.

"Carry me?", Selena asked pretending to be helpless.

"I swear, do you ever not flirt?", I sighed.

"It's what I do...", she giggled.

"Something wrong?", I asked.

"You want to fuck?", she inquired, "I could really use a good fuck right now."

"Uh...", I said.

"I had a great meal, wonderful night out, and the company was great.", she stated with a smirk, "It wouldn't be right to give you nothing at all for all that."

"You don't have too.", I said helping the two of them up the stairs.

"Come on, you think we are attractive right?", Ivy asked with a smile, "The two of can reward you very nicely for everything you have done. I admit we have slacked off so it's the least we can do."

"I don't take advantage of drunk women.", I said.

"We are asking you too.", they replied pressing themselves against me.

"I think I have made myself pretty clear on-"

"Shut up and just tell us!", they snapped stopping on the stairway, "If Lobo is here the rest of the Regime knows where we are. There is a chance we could die so don't fucking hold it over our damn heads like a treat! Do we have a chance, or do you not want to be with us?"

"I do, while you all are pretty much bums...I do like you.", I stated, "That said, I have concerns whether or not you can give up being villains. I am not saying you have to stay home and be mothers, all I want from you is loyalty, honesty, and to not be criminals. If you want to fight alongside me I am happy to have you. If you want to do something else I support you one hundred percent, I just can't support you being the criminals you once were."

"That...that is a fair request.", they said nodding their heads, "You are a Hero, and it would be bad if you were found to be with a villain. Are you serious about supporting whatever endeavors we want?"

"Absolutely.", I stated.

"If I wanted to make a preserve for plants, you wouldn't stop me?", Ivy asked, "I could raise my babies without any worry about you destroying them?"

"Of course, I would find you a world you can plant all your babies on far away from anyone potentially harming them.", I said, "I would help you bring back extinct plants, and make the environment suit them."

"If I wanted to help you, you wouldn't coddle me like a child? You'd let me an equal part of the team like you do with the others?", Selena asked.

"Of course, as I told them WE would need to make time for future children, but I wouldn't force the burden on you. Everything we do should be a fifty-fifty joint effort no matter what it is.", I answered.

"Then we can give up being villains.", they said without skipping a beat.

"...just like that?", I asked.

"With a planet to raise my babies I have no need to harm anyone here. I can have a peaceful place far away from anyone's filthy hands.", Ivy said.

"As an equal partner I won't be treated like a fragile woman. I know how to fight, and keep up with you just fine. Batman always treated me like I would break, as if I was a fucking princess. I know how to kill people, I know how to fucking run away when it's too dangerous, I don't need a fucking bastard coddling me like I am useless without him!", Selena snapped, "All I wanted was for Bruce to treat me like a fucking equal, and he never once saw me that way. I have seen first hand that you trust your girlfriends to handle themselves, and you only step in when it's someone outside their class in combat, I have no problem with that."

"Alright.", I said a bit caught off guard, 'This is different from the comics, I didn't think they'd just quit like that.'

"You don't believe us?", they asked.

"Well I-"

"Listen up, stop acting we are like a character in the damn comics you wrote! They may tell the overview of our lives, but we are more than just what is written here.", they stated, "Stop acting like you know us better than we do!"

"I...", I said realizing I was pushing an image onto them, "You are right...I am sorry. Before meeting you all in person I...the only real thing I knew was that overviewing storyline. Obviously you aren't the same people in the comics, but I have trouble seeing you that way because it's all I really knew."

"It's partially our fault because we have been bums.", Ivy said, "We haven't really given you the chance to get to know us, that is our fault."

"Alright, so where do you two want to go from here?", I asked.

"You are going to date us properly, and we will start showing you who we are as women.", Selena said, "We will stop being bums so we can show you we are serious. Ivy and I fully intend to give up our criminal life if you follow through with your promise."

"Very well, but I am still not sharing you with any other man!", I said sternly, "That's mainly for Blackfire..."

"Yeah that...that is more complicated.", Ivy said, "That's a cultural thing none of us understand."

"The only thing I can think of is since they are a warrior race that the multiple husband thing is to ensure there are always children being born.", I shrugged.

"Could be.", they laughed, "We don't intend to pursue other men so you are safe."

Standing on the stairs for an hour, we chatted about their childhoods and how they got to where they were now. After our discussion was over the two of them kissed me, and went to their rooms for the night.

'It's different...these aren't people on a page, and I keep making them out that way.', I thought, 'It's not them that needs to change...it's my way of thinking.'

---Next Morning---

Seeing Sonico off as she returned home for another five days of therapy, I got breakfast ready for everyone. True to their word Selena and Ivy came down with the others in comfy clothes. Serving everyone breakfast, Maxima and Blackfire came down with wicked hangovers...apparently aliens could get hung over too.

"You both going to be alright?", I asked.

"Yea...give us a bit.", they groaned, "Feels like we lost a fight with a Gorlack..."

"Gorlack?", Mina asked.

"It's a giant rock monster.", Blackfire said, "If you get hit by one it hurts like we feel now..."

"What's a look like?", Melissa asked out of curiosity.

"A large boulder when they are asleep, but when they awaken it looks like a giant snake. They use their tails to knock out prey.", Maxima said, "They are a common sight in the Andramador-17 system."

"Interesting, Clark can we go see them?", Melissa asked.

"Yeah they sound like a lot of fun!", Mina laughed.

"Yeah, I got no idea where that system is though.", I replied.

"I can guide you.", Maxima promised.

"So what's the plan for today?", Nejire asked.

"After I drop you girls off I am going to deal with Lobo. He's currently in the Midwest at a bar so his probably drinking.", I stated, "We will go deal with him, and gather what information we can from him."

"We?", Rumi asked.

"It's an open invitation for those of you that want to go, outside of those who have class.", I said looking at Toga and Mina who were about to ask to go.

"You're no fun.", Nejire jabbed.

"I can't have you slacking off with tests coming up.", I chuckled.

So with that, we had breakfast and went about our daily routine.

---Iowa, USA---

Taking several of the women with me we descended on the bar where Lobo was. It was pretty clear he was here as there were several unconscious bouncers, a few dead idiots, and bullet holes in the walls. Sighing I really didn't want to deal with him as he was an obnoxious asshole, I'd rather deal with Deadpool over him. Walking into the bar I found him kicking back beers with several local women around him. Seeing me walk in a grin came across his face.

"Well well well, so the man in blue shows up.", he mocked, "Come here to arrest me for something?"

"Seeing as how you killed several men, yes.", I stated.

"Self-defense, they tried touching Th' Main Man's lady friends. Their ass is my property for the night.", he laughed smacking their butts hollering like a fool, "Damn the women here have nice asses!"

"Still as despicable as ever.", Kara hissed.

"Hey you are alive! Thought the boss did a number on you, and you died.", Lobo said, "Congratulations on staying alive...for a few months more. Got a nice bounty on your head for betraying the boss."

"I didn't betray him, he went off the deep end!", Kara snapped.

"He didn't go off it, he fucking made the deep end!", Ivy and Selena refuted.

"Oh shit, you bringing me my bounties to make friends!?", Lobo said, "Well shit man let me buy you a beer!"

"This isn't a social call Lobo.", I stated, "I want you to leave my universe immediately."

"Hey I will leave as soon as my bounties are completed. I just need their heads, you can keep the bodies.", he laughed.

"I don't find you insulting my girlfriend's amusing.", I growled.

Spitting up his beer, he looked at me like I was crazy.

"You mean you are bedding all those bitches!?", he shouted, "For fuck sakes man, even Th' Main Man hasn't had that many yet!! You fucking lucky bastard!"

Twitching with anger, I didn't like people insulting my girlfriends.

"Kick his ass!", Rumi shouted.

"Who the fuck invited a Playboy Bunny?", Lobo asked, "Hey baby, if mini-dick supes isn't satisfying you Th' Main Man will rock your world!"

"Not if you were the last person on the planet!", Rumi hissed.

"Come on, you just need some tough loving baby!", Lobo said getting up.

"I suggest you stay sitting down...", I growled, "I was going to try to be reasonable since Superman is forcing you to do his bidding, but I changed my mind. No one fucking insults my girlfriends you pale, dick eating, psychopath!"

"You want fight me punk!?", he shouted, "Th' Main Man is always looking for a good fight!"

Swinging at me, I stopped his fist with my pinky finger. Trying it again several times I stopped each punch the same way. After a few dozen blows he stopped, and looked at me with confusion.

"I am not impressed Lobo.", I said, "Let me show you what a real punch looks like!"

"Ah fuck...", he said before my fist slammed into his face.

Shooting out of the bar like a rocket, Lobo skipped the corn fields completely unconscious.

"That's a punch you fucking prick!", I snapped.

"I am starting to like having a boyfriend!", Selena laughed.

Telling the women Lobo was keeping around to leave, they offered me their services which set Kara and Rumi off. Ordering them to leave before they woke up in the hospital, the women bolted.

"Alright, can I leave getting into his lockbox up to you Selena?", I asked referring to Lobo's lockbox on his bike.

"Absolutely, Maxima and Kara can you make sure that bike doesn't try to kill me?", Selena asked remembering the bike had a mind of it's own.

"Got it.", they replied walking outside.

Turning to the bartender, I asked if Lobo had told him anything. Shaking his head the bartender stated that he hadn't said much except ask for alcohol and women. Flying off to drag him back, Raven and Wonder Girl went with Stargirl to make sure everything went smoothly. A few minutes later Selena returned with the contents of the box. In the box was a list of people that Lobo was to hunt down, and kill. There were fifty people, and several of them were already crossed off.

"He got Cheetah.", Selena said pointing to the check mark.

"He also got Penguin, Riddler, Slade, and several others.", Blackfire read.

Dragging the unconscious Lobo into the bar, I had Kelex dispatch a team of robots to repair the damage before I took us to the Fortress.

---Fortress of Solitude---

"Listen here flyboy these restrains ain't going to keep Th' Main Man down!! When I get out of here I am going shove my boot right up your ass!", Lobo snapped.

"Assuming I don't rip you leg off and shove it up yours first.", I growled, "Let's get one thing clear piss ant, your only alive because we need information out of you. Try to lay a finger on anyone, and you and I will be taking a dip in the Sun. You think you can survive that?"

"Haha...let's not do that.", he said.

"How did you get here?", Raven asked.

"Stole Baty's portal thing, had to hotwire it to get here.", Lobo laughed, "Jackass rigged the thing to blow without his credentials."

"Satellites show you blew something up in the Ural Mountains, what did you destroy?", I asked.

"Some pencil pushing bitch tried to tell me what to do when I showed up. Th' Main Man ain't no one's bitch, and I showed him that by making him part of the landscaping. It's an improvement if you ask me.", he laughed.

"How did you locate those of us in hiding so quickly?", Selena asked.

"Haha, Heroes keep the weird shit as trophies. The Whiny Bitch in Blue had stuff with your scent on it so I tracked you that way.", Lobo said, "No fucking idea why they keep shit of yours around. Makes no damn sense to me, pretty creep if you ask me."

"Your creeped out?", Kara inquired.

"Nah it's just what other people would say.", Lobo laughed.

"Does the Regime know where we are?", Ivy asked.

"Of course they do, I was told to come here to take you quietly. Apparently those numbskulls forget that I like to have a fucking good time!", he chuckled, "If you found allies here they were going to come here to take you by force. All of you are traitorous bitches, and they want you to be put 6ft under. I was going to make it easy on you, but now that I didn't check in they will be here in a few weeks. Damn portal burst when I came through so they got fix Baldy's old portal."

"Baldy?", they asked.

"You mean Luthor?", I questioned.

"I don't give a shit about a dead man's name.", Lobo stated.

"How is the Insurgency doing?", the women asked.

"Hell if I know, if I ain't making money I don't give a shit.", he laughed.

"Trying to get anything useful out of him isn't going to happen.", Wonder Girl said.

"Maybe I can be persuaded if you give me a little something ladies.", he said flashing a grin.

"Spoken for!", they said grabbing me.

"Seriously...how the hell do you keep that many babes around you?", Lobo asked, "Got to let Th' Main Man in on your secret."

"Maybe it's because I don't treat them like a pleasure toy...", I stated.

"He's not a slob, an asshole, or a drunk like you.", Kara said, "You are all around nasty."

"Thanks for the compliment babe!", Lobo chuckled with a wink.

"That's why you don't keep women, you're a pig.", Fury stated.

"I get plenty of women, just was curious how he managed to keep such bitchy snobs around.", he retorted, "All of you are some-"

"If you don't stop I will claw your tongue off.", Selena hissed.

"Don't threaten me with a good time.", he laughed.

"No point in trying to insult him, it rolls right off him.", Raven said, "Torture and mind reading won't work either."

"Haha your welcome to look.", he laughed.

Putting him in cryogenic stasis I stowed him outside the Fortress once he was completely frozen. I was comfortable letting the natural liquid hydrogen keep him on ice as he wouldn't be going anywhere out there. Since we had a timeframe for their arrival they all looked at me for what my plan was.

"I hope you aren't going to fight them on our world.", Rumi said, "You already conceded we aren't prepared to fight someone like him here."

"The safest bet is going to be to strike first. I say we get Nezu to help setup an assault team, and we go as a group on Saturday. That gives us time to prep, gather our forces, and allows us some time to contact the Insurgency.", I stated.

"Sounds like a plan.", Blackfire said with a grin.

"Oh, there is something we need to discuss ladies.", Selena said.

"What?", Raven asked.

"After we liberate our world, who is staying her and who is going home?", Selena asked.

"I am definitely going home, I appreciate the protection Clark but I have friends and family.", Star Girl said.

"I will have to return as well to the lead the Amazons.", Wonder Girl said, "I will make sure we are ready to aid you when Prime arrives."

"The two of us are staying.", Ivy said motioning to Selena, "Clark has conceded to give us a genuine chance, and has agreed to date us."

"Correct, I have no connections left on that side I want anything to do with.", Selena said.

"We are staying.", Blackfire and Maxima said.

"You staying for him?", Ivy asked.

"I most certainly am, I know a good man when I see one.", Blackfire said, "I have already been informed of the requirements, I will give up my evil ambitions to enjoy a more peaceful life. That said I still wish for combat, and traveling."

"That can be arranged.", Rumi retorted with a grin, "I get someone in the group that can spar with me, hell yeah!"

"I also wish to toss my hat in. While I do have duties at home, I can travel there during the days and be home at nights.", Maxima promised.

"I can respect that decision.", I said.

"I am staying as well, Kara is the only person I have left. Your also a good guy so I am happy to stay.", Fury said.

"I will stay, I enjoy the feeling of being in your home. It reminds me of better days on my home world.", Raven stated.

"Alright, so when do we consummate this?", Maxima asked, "I won't long to have partner."

"We just came to this arrangement last night, and you are already asking...", I sighed.

"I wish to demonstrate our compatibility, and seal the deal as you humans say.", Maxima said, "I don't think it's out of the question given we have been listening to mate with your other girlfriends. Just yesterday you mated with Nemuri and Rumi, we have needs too."

"I'd like to point out I am not that desperate.", Raven said.

"Same.", Fury said.

"I have a duty to my people to have many children.", Maxima said, "I wish to start immediately."

"How about toning down a bit, we have to deal with the Regime before any of that matters.", Selena said, "After that we will consummate the arrangement, and show you we mean business."

Walking forward she whispered in my ear.

"We like it raw, and no pulling out.", she teased.

"You ever going to stop teasing me?", I sighed.

"Hehe I enjoy it.", she laughed, "Alright boyfriend, what's your plan?"

The plan would be a three part operation involving a lot of luck over everything else. Phase 1 was making contact with the Insurgency, and offering assistance to take him out. Second, and most importantly, we had to take out Spectre. Fighting him in that world meant fighting him in a world with lots of magic for him to use. If I got the drop on him I could forcibly separate him from Mister Mxyzptlk. Once he is separated I will kill that fucking bastard imp, and ensure no one sees him again. Batman could have taken him out with the help of Constantine if it weren't for him. Lastly was jumping the main group with Spectre's assistance.

"You want to ask him for assistance?", Kara asked.

"He was forcibly ripped from his rightful host by Mister Mxyzptlk, and he can't go back because the host is insane now. After everything that happened I think Spectre will be more than happy to help us dispatch them.", I replied.

"We are killing all of them?", Fury inquired.

"Shazam is only a child, I won't kill him. I can force him to change back with a powerful lightning bolt.", I stated, "As for the others, we either make them surrender or kill them. At the very least Superman and Wonder Woman are getting executed."

"Agreed.", they said, "Too much of a liability to leave them alive."

With all of us in agreement, we returned to the manor to prepare.

---UA High School---

"I see...", Nezu said looking over the reports I provided him.

Consisting of what Lobo did, and the information we gained from him it was clear Nezu wasn't comfortable with this. He understood the severity of the situation, but he didn't like the idea of one of his students taking a life. Be that as it may, he also recognized I was the only one that could it and that fighting here would lead to many deaths.

"Does the UN know?", he asked.

"What they know isn't the full truth...to the people from the other universes are extraterrestrial beings. If they knew I could travel to other universes and what was coming I am afraid it might provoke a war.", I replied.

"That is a wise decision.", Nezu said.

"I am going to need a few Heroes to back us up. Do you think you can gather a few trustworthy people?", I questioned.

"I can, let me make a few calls.", Nezu answered.

Heading to lunch, I met up with the girls and gave them an update of things. Hearing that we would be making the trip much sooner than expected, they were understandably nervous. Even though they were fearful they all were determined to help me.

"What do you need from us?", Momo asked.

"We will do three more training sessions with the Amazons before the assault. Soak up as much knowledge as you can, and wear the armor I brought you.", I said with a serious look, "I am not going to sugarcoat this, you will see things that will upset you. The Superman there has crossed lines no sane Hero would, and thousands have died because of him."

"We understand, but that isn't stopping us.", Mina and Toga said.

"Yeah, we want to help!", Ochaco and Toru declared.

"Let's kick their ass!", Momo and Itsuka laughed smiling like idiots.

"Once we are done we can eat ice cream to celebrate!", Dorothy stated with a smile, "Mint chocolate for the win!"

"I think you meant to say cookie dough.", Ochaco said, "Clark and I think it's the best."

"No, it's green tea.", Momo stated.

"You are all wrong, it's orange sherbet.", Mina snapped, "It's the best, and there is no-"

"Actually it's Clark's homemade vanilla.", Toga corrected.

"Yeah...", they all said, "That's true, your vanilla is really good."

"Uh...you guys aren't talking about something else are you?", Jiro asked with a confused look.

Informing her that I made homemade ice cream from scratch, she nodded her head. Stating that she thought we were saying it as a nod to our sex life, the girls hung their heads as their faces turned red.

"Told you they keep the bed warm.", Bakugo sighed.

"About that...", I said turning to him, "I heard you made a rather unsavory comment about my-"

"Don't bring that up...I already got an earful from the Old Hag!", he grumbled, "I am sorry for saying something rude to you all..."

It was clearly a half assed apology, but an apology none the less.

"So what's this about an assault?", Ida asked, "Are you planning a raid of some kind?"

"You could say that.", I said, "We-"

Before I could finish, a motorbike burst through the window. Shield everyone at the table from the glass, I saw Lobo was on his motorbike. Asking Kelex for an update he quickly confirmed that Lobo was still frozen outside the fortress meaning there was a drop of his blood somewhere that we missed.

"What's up Supes, you having a little tea party?", Lobo laughed, "Adults should be-"

"I am only fifteen...", I stated.

"...wait...", he said getting off his bike, "You look just like the Supes in my world, how the hell did you make yourself look so old!"

"I matured quickly.", I replied, "Mind explaining why you burst on to the school grounds?"

"Th' Main Man doesn't take a beat down like a bitch. I came back for Round 2!", Lobo said bringing his gun out.

Dashing forward, I blocked the end of the barrel before he fired.

"That was a bad decision...", I growled melting the gun into a puddle of metal.

"Temper there boy scout!! Scout Master Lobo might need to discipline you!", he aiming behind me.

Clearly he recognized that I was out of his league so he was going for the next best thing, my girlfriends. Blocking his way, he whistled to his bike which immediately started acting on it's own.

"Finally some freaking action!!", Bakugo shouted jumping out of his seat.

"Agreed, it's been quite boring.", Shoto said.

"You guys, we probably should be more concerned with alerting the teachers. Not everyone at the school is probably-"

Before he could finish a second Lobo appeared crashing through the roof. Seeing a second one of him Bakugo and Shoto tried to engage him. Freezing his legs and waist Shoto cleared a shot for Bakugo to blast him. Blasting him point blank in the face, Bakugo let his guard down as a few moments later the second Lobo slammed his head into Bakugo. Skidding across the floor Bakugo was in shock from both the blow and the fact his blast didn't even faze him.

"You're going to need to do better than that kiddo. Th' Main Man is going to show you who your daddy is!", Lobo said breaking free of his restrains.

Grabbing the first Lobo, I slammed him into the second one. Shooting forward, I shoulder checked both of them to get them out of the cafeteria.

"Who the hell are those guys!?", Mineta shouted.

"He's a Bounty Hunter.", Momo stated, "He is incredibly strong, probably in All Might territory."

"Thanks for the fucking warning!", Bakugo said getting up.

"No one told you to be an idiot, you just jumped in without asking!", the girls snapped, "It's not our problem!"

Running into the cafeteria the teachers asked what had happened. Before anyone responded they heard the sound of gunfire from out on the campus. Activating the lockdown system all the students were told to head to secure locations while the staff ran to confront the problem. Rushing to the area where the shots came they found me with two frozen Lobo's and a destroyed bike. Currently on the phone with Kelex I was trying to figure out how he got here without us getting alerted.

avataravatar
Next chapter