8 Right and Wrong

"Here." Nitya snapped out of her thoughts upon hearing Nikith's voice. She was sitting on the terrace gazing at the sky, looking at the stars.

"Thanks." She grabbed the bowl of icecream from his hands.

"What? Even icecream couldn't get a smile out of you?" Nikith, although he was teasing her, he was disheartened by the sight of the girl in front of him. Looking at how much she had changed in the matter of three months, truly surprised him. And he knew the arrogant, rude boy he'd met today was the one responsible for it. He'd even wanted to beat the guy black and blue for a second but then he was not much for violence.

"Nitya, tell me what's going on in your head?" He asked, sitting down next to her. Nitya didn't know what to say. There was a whirlpool of emotions inside her at that moment.

"I don't know. I'm feeling nothing and everything at the same time, if it makes any sense." Nikith nodded, not that she could see it. He placed a hand around her shoulder as she rested her head on his.

"Why am I doing this, Bhai[1] ?" She asked after a moment of silence. Rare moments like these where Nitya had called him 'Bhai' could be counted on one hand. Such moments only came around when she was feeling like a little child lost in the huge world with no one to guide her to the light.

"Because he may be Avyan Oberoi, but you are Nitya Sanghvi too. He may be rich but he needs to understand that you're not a toy he can pick up and throw away any time he likes. We may not be as rich or famous as him, but we have self- respect too. And you're not a commodity that he bought from the store but is now passing on to his best friend out of pity." Nikith explained to her. Though these were the things that she already knew, but his words somehow reassured her to some extent.

"Do you remember your first month in college that you told me about?" He questioned.

"Where is that Nitya who came to this city with dreams in her eyes, love and strength in her heart, and aware of her self-worth?" He continued.

"Liking or loving someone doesn't make you weaker, Nitya. It doesn't rob you of your own self. Instead, it strengthens you. It gives you the power to fight everything." He taught her like a little kid. Listening to his words, she remembered everything that she'd learned, be it from her parents, her family or just life, in general. There is no greater teacher than life, after all.

"So, I'm not doing anything wrong, am I?" She just wanted reassurance for her actions.

"Well, right or wrong is just a perspective, Nitya. What may appear black to others, may appear gray to you. Society or some value education doesn't get to decide what's right or wrong for everyone. Everyone goes through something or the other experiences which shapes them up like a potter's hands molding a clay slab. Nobody knows how much the other person is suffering or has suffered. Then, how can each situation be judged on the same grounds?" Times like these, of deep conversations about nothing and everything, made her realize that he was four years elder to her.

"Then what is right, according to you?" Nitya enquired, curious about his principles all of a sudden.

"For me, as long as your actions aren't committed with malicious intentions and act in the major good of everyone and most importantly, you can still sleep at night after it; then I consider it to be right. As for you, you need to find out your own rights and wrongs!" He finished as he patted her head with one head.

"But what about Tarun? Am I doing right by him too?" She asked.

"Nitya, I don't think that boy loves you or likes you, as he claims. From what I've gathered, you're just a new, fresh breath of air in his life, quite different from his usual calculative and bratty friends." He replied.

"I don't know if I'm right or not but I think instead of you, he likes his friend. Oh, what was her name?" He asked, trying to recall the girl he'd seen with Tarun that day.

"Shanaya? You noticed that too?" She jumped up. From quite a few days, even before the whole Avyan fiasco, she'd noticed something going on between Tarun and Shanaya. She'd seen them shooting each other glances when the other wasn't looking but she'd brushed them off as nothing.

"Yeah. So, this relationship between you and Tarun is just him trying to sort out through his feelings. Fortunately, it is mutually going to benefit both of you. So, relax and stop thinking too much." He pinched her nose which she scrunched up.

Nitya couldn't help but feel lighter after talking to him. The plan they'd conjured up with Vivaan today was a little extreme but he had assured her that only extreme action worked on Avyan. Unless you hit his coconut- like head with a hammer, normal words can't get through him.

The verbal blows she'd exchanged with Avyan had exhausted her a little but she couldn't help but feel more like her usual self now. She was still the girl who wasn't afraid of standing up to anyone; she was still the girl who'd gone up against the most powerful people in the college on her day one; she was still the girl who'd slapped the most popular guy in the college in front of everyone.

********************

Avyan sat down on his bed, eyes bloodshot and breath heaving. Everything around him was in a mess, thanks to his outburst a few minutes ago. He wasn't angry at Nitya or even Tarun. He was angry at himself. However happy he tried to be for Tarun, his own grief and pain were the only emotions he could feel. Earlier when he had first decided to go forward with his plans, he never thought it'd hurt that much. He definitely knew he would miss holding her in his arms, feeling the touch of her palms in his, talking to her about problems he never shared with his friends, threading through her long black hair between his fingers and most importantly, her shy smile that always seemed to provide strength to him. He'd thought he'd venture through it seeing his buddy's happiness. But now with each day, he was finding it difficult to just live in general.

He had to give it to Nitya, though. The Nitya who appeared before him today was the same Nitya who'd stood up to his bullying many times. The fire in her eyes were the same. Yet, there was something different. The affection and hurt that used to be absent earlier, was clearly evident now. He knew the pain was his gift to her but the affection, he didn't know whether it was for him or just the afterglow of a new relationship.

He so badly wanted to be in Tarun's place. He wanted to be the only one to call Nitya as his, to hold her, to be the one in her prayers and to be the only one for whom her eyes twinkled.

[1] Bhai= Elder brother, most commonly. Can be used for younger males too.

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