1 A Perfect and Normal Day

When I woke up, I got dressed and walked to work. At the mental asylum.

I started doing paperwork on patients. A man walked into my office with a gun and I just stared. I started speaking, "Hey, are you lost?"

He spoke, "I need to get out of here, there's a giant monster outside, an insane scientist, and a lost super powered insane girl, also a guy with a chainsaw."

"Shit, this is like... the 30th time this has happened. By the way, this place is haunted. But for some reason, they still keep this place going. They also pay me in big bucks. Which is nice. Also, how did you get here?"

He told me his name was John ,told me a story about how he was driving, his car abruptly stopped and he was knocked out and brought here to "get better".

"Hmm ok, you're probably perfectly sane. I'm probably not though. So you should stay at least 5 feet away from me. Also, stay behind me."

I walked out with my tranquilizers and prepared myself. I saw a floating girl slowly moving towards me. I got a tranquilizer and gave her a shot. Then, I held her body and lifted her body into a room. Then, I strapped her to the bed. I sprayed the room with air freshener and covered her body with a blanket. No idea how they keep getting out.

I walked out and saw John shooting a tall naked pale man with a giant jaw and no dick. I grabbed an axe and said, "No visitors allowed after 8 pm sir. Also, you're a huge threat to the patients... sooo" and then I whacked him with the axe. Years of breaking through walls to get to my office, had turned my arm to become incredible.. shich allowed me to absolutely crush this man.

Was he a patient.... eh not important.

I grabbed it's body and threw it out the window, not very ethical, but giant monsters trying to kill me can't sue me. Except this person's wife that I met a few weeks ago. John went behind me.

After a while, we went downstairs to the exit.... and it wasn't there. It was just a wall, with no exit. Goddamnit.

I told him to be cautious and we decided to walk upstairs to got to the fire escape. It wasn't there. So, I got the axe. I broke it down and saw another room. That a guy with a chainsaw was in. He started running towards us and I told John to get back.

Lifting my axe up, I blocked the chainsaw, knocking it away, before I swung my axe as hard as possible at the flat side of the sword. Breaking it.

After which I tranquilized him. So I picked up his giant body and brought him to his room.

I strapped him to his bed and covered him with a blanket. I sprayed the air with perfume and walked out. John was waiting there.

I decided to go to the basement and we saw a dude being operated by... people who don't work here. I also saw a dude who founded this place. Though he was stabbed to death by a patient. Yeah, even though we are funded by the government, we are also somewhat ethical. This man uhh, just wasn't. I told them, "Get out of here before I use lethal force."

The dude said, "You can leave once you're treated."

Then, they contort to become terrifying humanoid monsters. I got my axe and took a gun out of my pocket. I went to work. They were taken care of. Man, how the fuck did this even happen. Why is this place haunted? Who pays me? How do I get them to do my taxes for me?

After an hour, I found the exit and he left. I also walked out, since my shift was over. I saw John drive off, then I turned around and saw a ————