1 Simula

Simula

"Code blue! Code blue!"

I was awakened by the loud sound of the pager hanging on the chair in our on-call room. It was even accompanied by the system speakers that made me wake up from my slumber.

"Shit." naibulong ko na lamang nang makita kung anong nakalagay sa pager na gumising sa akin mula sa pagpapahinga.

I hurriedly grabbed my coat on the chair and ran out as fast as possible to go to the nearest elevator on this floor. Unluckily, as I reached the area the lift passed through my floor and is now going down. I frustratingly pulled my hair and didn't waste any more seconds, I looked around to see what floor this was and searched for the stairs I could take to reach the 8th floor where the code was in. 

On the right side just near the lift, there comes the stairs. Nagmadali akong pumunta roon at malalaking hakbang na tinahak ang hagdan. Hndi alintana ang kaba at pawis na nararamdaman. 

While on my way, my phone rang. It's a resident under the wing of another fellow calling.

"Dra. Wang, speaking." I spoke.

"Doc, it's patient Silva that gone code blue." I mentally cussed after hearing what she said.

"Is there any fellow on sight? Where is Dra. Laude?" I asked.

"None. Dra Laude's currently out of reach." I sigh my frustration. Damn, that incompetent biatch!

"Ready the defibrillator and execute CPR. I'm on my way. Don't let the patient die." I firmly commanded before ending the call.

Mas lalo kong binilisan ang aking kilos ni hindi ko na pinansin pa ang namamanhid kong paa mula sa pag-akyat ng anim na palapag mula sa on-call room. Ang tanging bagay lamang na nasa aking isipan ngayon ay makarating ng tamang oras at mailigtas ang pasyente mula sa bingit ng kamatayan.

When I reached the room, I saw the resident performing CPR, so I asked how long it had been.

"F-for about 7 minutes, Doc." Hinihingal na sagot niya

I change position with her while constantly looking at the monitor to see the rate if there are some changes or none. However, it only showed that the patient had a slower-than-normal heart rate. With a rate like this, CPR can't sustain him if this continues it will danger the patient's life even more. 

"Bradycardia! Defibrillator!" 

I grabbed the paddles as they handed them to me and commanded the charge.

"Clear!" It didn't do anything; I must make it higher.

"Charge to 200!"

"Clear!" I shouted and looked at the monitor waiting for something to happen.

"Please… please… please" I mumbled silently

I released an exhale, na muntikan nang magpaupo sa akin. 

"Patient… is s-stable." Mahina kong usal

"Doc, you saved him." It's like I didn't hear anything because what I am feeling right now is nothing but the burn of my muscles 

from the adrenaline, tiredness, relief, frustration, and anger. It's my job to save him. I saved him. I was able to save him because I was just on time. But what if I wasn't? What if, I was late? 

"Where is Dra. Laude? Shouldn't she be here knowing her patient only got out from surgery and is in a dire situation?" striktang paghahanap ko sa doktor na siyang dapat naka-monitor sa pasyenteng ito.

"Dra. Laude c-clocked out earlier t-to some u-unknown reasons, Dra. Wang." Sagot ng resident niya

I responded sarcastically to that at napailing na lamang. That good-for-nothing must be enjoying her time having a night out while giving all the work to her residents. What a shameless biatch.

"What did I expect of her? Monitor the patient from then on, keep me updated." Then I left the room, they knew what to do next.

On my way back to the on-call room, I was called by someone at the reception desk.

"Dra. Wang, here are the updated chart of your patients." Sabay abot ng may kakapalang pinagpatong-patong na folders.

I wasn't able to say my thanks because as I looked up, my eyes met the eyes of the man I broke years ago wearing his white double-breasted jacket with epaulets and numerous insignia attached to it that I am not familiar with over his buff body. 

Striking on the other side of the reception desk with his perfect jawline, thin kissable lips, glorious nose, and those sleepy eyes that look at me darkly. His ivory skin matched his uniform perfectly so that everyone in the hospital couldn't leave their attention on him. He looks manly and very successful now.

"Marten?" mahina ngunit alam kong narinig niya

The way he looks at me… parang gusto niya akong tanggalan ng hininga. It's not like gugustuhin niya akong yakapin hindi ba? Afterall, our past didn't end good.

"Yvan! Babe, why did you leave me there!" Nalipat ang aking tingin sa masayang babae na tumawag sakanya. Mara. 

They ended up together, I see. Him with the girl he never noticed and who had been in love with him for a long time now. 

That's… good for both of them. But why do my eyes hurt and my heart sting? Do I need to sleep now or… No, I've already moved one. Ours ended a decade ago. What I am feeling right now must be due to frustration earlier.

I shifted my eyes back to him only to notice that his piercing eyes didn't leave mine even after Mara called him. She was about to look at me too, but I didn't want that to happen, so I hurriedly turned my back on them while holding the folders given by my resident and started walking away. 

I was even greeted and called by the others, but I didn't mind looking back or answering them.

What I want is to just leave and be out of sight. Seeing them today was a strong slap. I wasn't ready to witness such that. No, I didn't expect that it would turn this way. Kaya naman nang makabalik ako sa on-call room doon lang ako nakahinga ng maluwag at tumulo ang luhang kanina pa pinipigalan ng aking mga mata. 

"Gosh! What is this?" sinabayan ko pa ng tawa habang pinupunasan ito gamit ang aking palad

"This is ridiculous. I-I've moved on. I w-was just stressed, that's w-why." While tapping my shoulders if anyone sees me would think I am hugging myself. 

"Hey, what happened?" tinignan ko ang direksyon kung saan nanggaling ang boses na narinig ko

I thought, somehow my tears would stop from flowing down but it didn't. Instead, mas lalong bumuhos pa ang luha ko matapos makita kung sino ang nandito ngayon.

"Allei, what's wrong?" nag-aalalang lumapit siya sa akin at inakay palapit sakanya

"I-I saw him, Lori. I saw h-him with M-Mara." After hearing what I said she looked at me with sympathy and anger in her eyes then hugged me tightly.