4 3: Serenity

A year. One whole year since that day. Today was the anniversary of their murder. And yet, David won't let me get revenge.

"The world isn't safe for you, little one."

"You want revenge, not justice."

"You remind me of your mother every day."

His words had a way of disarming me just when I felt ready to run in guns blazing. I knew I was eighteen now, a legal adult technically not under his care anymore. I think he knew that too, especially with him taking over the role of my very overprotective parents who had blocked out the outside world from me in order to "keep me safe."

It really sucked.

And yet, here I was. My birthday was four months ago and yet I refused to leave the house like I had been planning to do the day I turned eighteen. I had once begged to go with my mom to work. She told me that it was too dangerous for me to go outside into the world and that she wanted me to be her safe little shadow at home.

Away from people.

The trail behind our house was graveled now, David had ensured that when he moved in so that my parent's graves were easily accessible to me whenever I wanted to go visit.

A small river ran beside the path, we found a waterfall when hiking back here once. It was hidden behind the cabin among the dense forest. We dug out a small path for it to run up to the house and besides the pathway.

My mother's hanbok* dress was long around it as I lifted it to walk down the path. My hair was braided and tied with a white ribbon. The skirt of the dress was a beautiful lavender color with flowers that reminded me of sakura* blooms decorating the bottom. The top was a white color with a royal purple bow tying it to my body.

The graves were in front of the cabin that had protected me one year ago. There was a smooth marble slab that covered the ground over them and two large rounded stones peaking out of the marble.

I stood before the stone of their graves and lit one of the incense sticks.

I went ever closer before stopping only a bit in front of their graves and falling to my knees. I could feel the sting of tears in my eyes as I bowed and placed my head against the cool stone.

I let a single tear splatter against the stone before I wiped my eyes and went back to sit on my legs under me.

"Hi, Momma, Dad. Sorry it's been so long since my last visit to you. I've been..." I paused, sensing something off in the forest surrounding the house and myself. I shook it off and ignored the nagging feeling in my gut to go home.

"Busy. I finally was able to get that high school diploma thingy you were always talking about. It was difficult especially with the new online courses that David had me taking, but I managed."

The feeling of unease and worry of an outsider became leaden in me, but I pushed it down again.

"I wish you could have gotten to taste my songpyeon, David said it was almost as good as yours, Momma. We celebrated-"

I heard the sound of a gunshot from the house and fear hit me again. David was home.

I rushed to my feet and ran as fast as I could towards my home, only to see the end of a horrible scene. A man I recognized from one year ago was there. He was one who held me back.

A growl ripped through me as a dagger of shadows formed in my hand. I didn't even have to think about it before the shadows ripped from the trees and house and attacked the man. His screams echoed through the forest. I sprinted towards my caretaker, the man who had taken care of me when my parents couldn't. The wound was to his head and his eyes were still widely opened with the pupils tiny within his irises.

I choked back a sob as the shadows wrestled the man to the ground, his eyes were opened wide, unblinking as they held them open. The gun was next to me on the ground and I let a scream echo through the space around me as I laid David's head on the ground and closed his eyes.

I stood, barely registering my surroundings as my gaze focused entirely on the man left with me in the clearing. I felt shadows wrapping themselves around me in some sort of armor.

I went to the man in the middle of the field and stared down at the pitiful excuse of a man in front of me.

"What's your name?" I asked him, only to be answered with silence. He stared at one part of the ground as if it was the most interesting thing on the planet. I grabbed his head and pulled his head back to have him make eye contact with me.

"Answer me."

His eyes started to become duller as he spoke to me. "My name is Daniel."

Then a flash happened. It was as if I could see everything that would happen in his life from this point, all pointing back to this moment of letting him live. To send a message.

It flowed and showed my own downfall of letting him go on with no punishments for his actions.

Can't have that, can we?

The dagger felt warmer in my hand as I stared at this disgrace of human flesh.

"Why are you here?"

"I was sent to kill anyone connected to Takeshi remaining in this house and check..." his voice dropped off, I saw the struggle in his eyes as he tried to fight whatever it was I was causing in his mind, but he seemed to be held strongly by the mental chains I had created.

"What were you going to check?"

"To check the status of the girl who got away."

I bit my lip and realized that whoever had sent this man here, they were looking for me. That isn't good.

I have to get them off the trail of me.

"Who sent you here?"

Daniel paused. He looked as if he was a fish pulled out of water. This was the line of what he would answer.

I lifted the dagger and pressed it to his forehead, the exact spot of where David was shot. The light returned to Daniel's eyes as he realized what I was about to do.

"Any final requests, Daniel?" I asked, disgust and anger lacing my words and creating poison.

He was silent as I drew the dagger back and stabbed through his skull, straight into his brain.

I backed away and looked at my work. The shadows from the forest immediately retreated away from the light of the day.

"Take him back to whoever sent him here," I commanded to the shadows still lingering. The ones around me lept towards him and suddenly, Daniel was gone. I was left alone in the clearing.

I squinted in the light of the sun as if it had just gotten brighter somehow. I looked up and realized that with the placement of the sun, it couldn't have been much after noon, so how had I managed to use my shadows without getting injured?

~~~~

I looked at the makeshift grave next to my parents as I stepped up to the new portion of the path I had created. My black jeans were now covered in dirt and grime. I had on an old AC/DC shirt that was ripped and slightly too small for me.

I let myself sit down on the small step up to my parents as a single sob finally hit me. I put my face to my knees and let myself cry openly.

A rustling came from the bushes deep in the woods around me. I looked up in alert and wiped my tears before placing my head back down to my knees. The rustling came again and I stood up, turning to face around to look from which direction it had come from. When I turned back towards where I originally had been facing, a white wolf sat there.

Their eyes were a bright blue and their fur a beautiful pure white color. From the smaller size and stature, I figured it had to be a female wolf. Her front right paw was bloodied and raised slightly in the air. She was panting as if out of breath from running away from something.

She then looked at me and I saw her body go into a defensive position before she stumbled slightly and had to sit herself back on the ground.

"Are you lost, pretty girl?" I asked her, holding my hand out to show I was not a threat. She growled slightly at my approach, but didn't make any move to attack. I held my hand in front of her, while remaining slightly distanced, as she sniffed me.

She stood up in my guess to flee, but fell into a heap with a small whimper.

I walked closer and examined how bloodied her fur really was, and saw that it was still bleeding.

"Okay, pretty girl, I will help you, but I need to pick you up, okay?" I asked her, not expecting her to huff at me almost in agreement. I had one arm under her neck and the other her body as I picked her up. Interesting, she feels slightly malnourished. I wonder why.

I went as quickly as I could carrying a wolf that was almost as big as me back to the house. I kicked the door lightly and it flew open, lights inside were still glowing dimly just how I liked it. I placed her on the kitchen table after kicking most of the clutter off onto the floor.

"I'll clean that up later," I said to myself, knowing I probably wouldn't. The wolf huffed at me almost in a laughing manner, almost as if thinking the same thing as me.

"Oh, hush, pretty girl," I said, jokingly. "I know I won't end up dong it, but I don't need you telling me that too!"

I swear she chuckled as I put my first aid kit on the counter. My mother had taught me long ago how to take care of bleeding and things of that nature due to me always hurting myself one way or another. I touched her paw and immediately the wolf snapped her teeth at me.

"I know this hurts, pretty girl, but you need to let me make sure it's not broken or worse," I said, placing my hand on her snout only to receive a lick on my hand, telling me to go on.

I moved it around only to see the shard of glass sticking out of the pad of her paw. I carefully pulled it out and heard a yelp from the wolf as I quickly held a piece of gauze to the wound. Slowly and carefully, I grabbed a needle and string before working on closing the wound completely. The wolf on my table whimpered, but didn't snap at me anymore. I took this as a good sign.

After it was closed and only slowly oozing, I placed a mound of gauze and wrapped her paw up as tightly as I could. I looked up at the girl and saw she had been watching me. I smiled at her and ruffled the fur on her head. She huffed again and it made me laugh. She reminded me of my mom whenever I would hug her or thank her for anything. So dismissive and cold, but I knew deep down that she appreciated it.

"Alright, pretty girl, I'm done now, but I can't let you go until that's fully healed," I smiled at her. "Guess you're stuck with me a bit longer, huh?"

She shook her head and huffed as if making fun of my childishness. Gods, I could get used to her being here with me all the time.

I lifted her up and moved her into my parents' old room, that had become my room when they were gone. I placed her down as more tears pricked my eyes.

The wolf noticed my distress and licked my face, causing me to giggle a bit. "Okay, pretty girl, I get it, no sadness today. I bet you're hungry, let me go get some food for us."

I went into the kitchen and noticed the meat in the fridge that had been moved this morning to thaw for dinner tonight. I pulled the packs of ground beef out and opened one up and poured it directly into the bowl and the other I started frying for me. I moved as quickly as I could, cutting potatoes and carrots before adding them too. I opened the freezer and found a pack of peas and shrugged. May as well add this too.

I seasoned the heck out of it before pulling it off the hot stove and turning the gas off. David made this for me all the time and he called it a campfire meal, and said that normally people made these over campfires in aluminum foil for individual meals. I spooned some in a bowl and grabbed a spoon out of the drawer. I grabbed the raw meat before making my way upstairs and back to the wolf. She woke to the smell of the food I brought to the room. Her tongue lolled out and she looked like an oversized puppy…with sharp teach and claws that could kill me…

I placed the bowl of raw meat in front of her and sat back against the headboard to eat my own meal. She looked hesitant and sniffed before devouring everything. She finished so fast it made my head spin.

"Woah, easy there, pretty girl," I giggled at her before she looked back and me and I swear to the gods, she smiled.

After I had finished and cleaned the dishes, I changed clothes and climbed into bed next to her. I clapped and the lights turned off, collapsing the room into complete darkness.

I felt the wolf make her way up to my arms at some point in the night and I snuggled my face into her fur. I fell back to sleep almost instantly.

For months we carried on as if we had always been together like this.

Three months had gone by and the wolf had finally started walking again, and I felt prided by it. It came to the day where I finally decided to let her go. She had definitely gained weight with me feeding her three times a day. I carried her outside and set her down in the grass.

"Alright, pretty girl, time for you to go home to your family," I said, backing away and towards the house. She tilted her head in question.

"Go on, back home," I said, feeling the tears coming up. The whole time she had been here, I hadn't felt the need to cry.

She turned towards the forest and ran off while I collapsed.

I don't know how long I was there before I felt a tongue on my face. I looked up to see the wolf, her eyes were sad as she worked to make me stop crying.

"Okay, okay, pretty girl," I said, a small laugh escaping me as she seemed to be smiling at me.

She plopped down in front of me and I reached out to her, drowning in the peace that she always brought me.

"If you're gonna stay, then I'm going to call you Naya, meaning new," I said and placed my forehead against hers. "You're my new family."

*Hanbok - traditional Korean clothing.

*Sakura - cherry blossoms