2 Dizzying Heights
I stood frozen in shock, confusion and embarrassment, every emotion hitting me from every which way and engulfing me.
"Hellooooo...?"
The voice came through again. My cheeks were flaming and I'm pretty sure I could hear my heartbeat racing a million miles per hour.
"I-"
I choked, not being able to find it in me to speak.
"Who is it, sweetheart?, I heard a sweet female voice in the background.
"Mom, I think it's just a silent call from a scammer or something. Weird.. I think I can hear the ocean? I-"
Before I heard anything else my finger pressed the end call button with a mind of its own.
"I.. I-"
Jolie looked at me with disbelief smeared across her face.
"What the hell was that?!"
"Well.. what did you expect by thrusting that phone in my face and blindsiding me like that?!"
"A simple 'hello' would have been nice.", she said matter-of-factly.
"Girl, I know you're not much of a flirt.. but even crickets know that being mute is NOT cute. Thank goodness I turned off caller I.D. because otherwise-"
I freaked, "I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT THAT! THANK GOODNESS YOU DID! I still can't believe you-"
"Nudged you out of your birdcage and perched you for flight into the arms of the man of your dreams?"
"Nudged? More like shoved!"
"Yeah.. well. You're welcome, by the way."
I took a moment to collect my bearings. Bella stood awkwardly at our side, wondering if she should interfere or how far this would escalate.
"I am thankful.. Don't get me wrong. But I was just so surprised and paralyzed from the shock of it all! My heart is still beating so fast! And I was going to cry on the phone, for goodness sakes! Imagine how awkward that would be! He would be so weirded out!"
"You were going to cry? For what?"
I considered the fact that this really should be obvious by now.
"You're talking to someone who got emotional over finding some itty bitty socks that belonged to young Steve in our old suitcase!"
She didn't quite know how to respond to that.
"Uh.."
"It's weird, I know! But if little things from back then have so much power over me.. You should only imagine what talking to Matthew of all people would do to me. Hearing his voice again.. for the first time in years..", I shuddered and shook off the goosebumps.
"Well, fine. Maybe that wasn't the best way to do things. But as much as I love repetitive 'tea parties' with you discussing the same thing over and over again.."
The self-consciousness hit me and I looked the other way as I knew it was true.
"I'm a woman of action and quick plans. I get things done instead of whining about them. And I GO places instead of wishing I was there. I know that you plan a ton too Shells, but unlike your perfect plans that take months, or even years to happen, I do things like this."
She snapped her fingers briskly.
"And even if a good number of my plans bursts into flames, it always works out in the end. So."
"So?"
"What's your plan?"
I opened my mouth to respond but I realized that I never really thought that far.
"Because if you don't have one-"
"I just.. Let me get used to the idea of how fast this is happening."
"The only thing you're getting used to is some California sun when I'm done with you!"
They giggled lightheartedly but I was thinking of going back, actually going back and all the opportunities that could lead to. It was so scary but oh so thrilling.
"Okay. I just want things to work out."
"Of course you do. And so we are gonna tackle this now. Before it's too late."
"Okay okay, it's just.. I just can't mess this up with a phone call. Some things are better done in person. He'll wonder why I finally called him after years of silence. I would have to explain how my foster parents forbade me from contacting old friends. Then, I'd have to tell him how even after moving in with you guys, I didn't feel like reforming our connection because I was depressed. That's deep, dark stuff. After almost FIVE YEARS of silence, I'd frankly rather hash out a conversation of this magnitude and weight in person."
Jolie didn't seem to be bothered by this at all.
"Sounds good to me! So we just have to get you to see him in person then."
She made it sound so easy. I wish.
"What school does he go to again?"
"Stanford..", I said dreamily.
Bella spoke up after a long while of silence with the mention.
"Well, dang! He's smart too? To be fair, if any of us is Stanford material, you are Shells. I mean, you got to graduate high school a year early and ranked #2 in your class! You won two national poetry competitions, became president of the Biology club, AND you've got so much lab experience!"
As much as I was flattered, I never liked to hear my accomplishments spewed back at me as a list.
"Aww thanks. As much as I appreciate the vouch of support Bells, for schools like that, applications become unpredictable on another level. And I didn't even break the waitlist at Duke this year, so.."
They looked hopeful but I still had something I left out.
"I didn't tell you guys, but I actually did apply to Stanford this year."
Bella's curiosity was immeasurable. "Oh my god! And?!"
"I didn't get in.. of course. It was just a stab at hope."
Now they really looked defeated.
Jolie wondered, "Have you already accepted your admissions offer from NC State? Didn't they have an early deadline or something since they gave you a full scholarship?"
"No. I thought I would wait to hear from UNC since the deadline is next month and UNC could get back to me by then."
There was a pause as we collectively calculated our options.
"You need to go to Stanford.", insisted Jolie.
"But I already got rejected, remember?"
"You'll just have to reapply next year. Delay going to college by one year and earn a scholarship."
"But how am I going to ensure that I get in next year?"
"For that to happen, you need to do something extraordinary. My bet is on that lab stuff you do."
Bella nodded, "I think she's right. Why don't you join a lab in Stanford and do some awesome science for a year?"
The gears in my head started turning.
"I think that could make me really competitive! And maybe I could churn out a research paper while I'm at it! ..But those labs are notoriously selective. How do I get in?"
It seemed like we were going in circles.
"Maybe there's a program for high school students to do research for the summer!", Bella chimed in.
"Hmm, that's a good idea."
I took out my phone and searched for 'Stanford high school research'.
After browsing their webpage for a few minutes,
"Ooh! Look at this guys! There's the Stanford Institutes of Medicine Summer Research Program, and the deadline is this Wednesday! It's only 8 weeks long but I can probably try to extend to a year if I work hard and impress my boss."
We huddled into a group hug and jumped from excitement at the new, promising prospect.
"Argh I'm so excited you guys! In just one day I feel like I've found a lot of hope to finally see Matthew AND go to my dream school!" I felt immense gratitude for finally being pushed to the edge. "Seriously, what would I ever do without you two?"
Bella beamed, "Now I want to work harder at school so that I can go to Stanford with you next year! That way we can all start school at the same time and in the same city!"
"That would be sweeeeet!", squealed Jolie before mentioning the time and the setting sun, and so we started to pack up and head home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's been a few days since the girls and I brainstormed that idea. As soon as I got home, I started putting my plan into action. After filling in the applications to the Stanford summer program, I decided to record my progress in a little video diary.
I stood in my bedroom facing the window, positioning the small camera before pressing record. I stepped into view and addressed the viewfinder,
"I'm so excited by Jolie's plan to get me in touch with Matthew again. I haven't stopped thinking about it for days."
I couldn't stop myself from laughing from how ridiculous this was, but I felt like if I didn't say things out loud I would somehow spontaneously combust with how many ecstatic thoughts were inside me.
"You know, I've always had a vision of what our reunion might be like. But now that it seems so possible, I guess I should talk about what I expect will happen.
In the background, 'For the First Time' by The Scripts should be playing. That song brings me to tears every time with the strong emotion conveyed in the chorus."
I sang a half decent version of the song I had replayed so many times in the past few days.
'We're smiling but we're close to tears / Even after all these years / We just now got the feeling that we're meeting / For the first time'
"That verse perfectly suits the moment I reunite with Matthew. Now for the setting.. It has to be romantic."
I pictured in my head a moonlit bench right by the riverside, with the dazzling lights of the city skyline in front of us. Where was I exactly going to find such a place? I had no idea but it was nice to imagine.
"My hair is going to be straightened to perfection, and I would be wearing the hottest glamorous maroon red dress. And yes, I still am yet to have one in my wardrobe but that's beside the point."
I let my thoughts drift away into the perfect imaginary scene laid before me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I could see Matthew's striking silhouette walking towards me in disbelief, his velvet dark hair reflecting in the moonlight.
"Oh my god. No way. Shelley? Is that really you?", he would splutter.
If I reunited with him, my stomach would fall a thousand miles, the butterflies would swarm within me, and my heart would beat at a million miles an hour..
I've missed this feeling so bad. The adrenaline courses through me like race cars on a highway.
But, come on, even imaginary me can't quit staring and gasping like a fish. Say something already!
"OHMYGODMATTHEW!" I barrelled into him, making myself trip.
"Here, let me get you up."
As his hands touched mine, I could feel the sparks go off in me that I thought I would never feel again.
"Grazie."
"Oh, my Shelley.. Amore mio, I've missed you so much.", he would declare as I gasped.
"Me too, Matthew! I love you too! I've missed you every day since you left! You have to let me explain!"
He would look at me adoringly as I then started to describe all the how's, why's and what's.
"I couldn't contact you at first because my foster parents forbade me from contacting you. And then I went to my Uncle Georgio's house, I was just so confused and lost and I.. but there really is no excuse.. I just had to take some time! And I'm so sorry!"
He would shush and soothe me as I fervently explained to him and instead take me by the small of my back, capturing my lips in his with no hesitance.
"You have no idea how long I have dreamed of doing that."
"This is so unbelievable. I love you, Matthew. I've always loved you."
End scene.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Okay. Maybe that was a bit silly but, ugh wouldn't that just be dreamy?
My daydream was interrupted with Bella yelling from downstairs.
"SHELLEY! Come down, it's 20 questions! Help us figure out what Steve's pretending to be!"
"I'm coming!"
Sigh. Family antics, am I right?
"Well, till next time diary! Ciao!"
I finished up my video and headed to the living room to see what all the commotion was about.
Jolie greeted me first, "Oh, good! You joined us!"
My little brother Stephen was showing off some odd dance moves in the center of the room while everyone else looked on in confusion.
"Hey slowpoke", he snickered to me. "Can you be smarter than these dweebs and guess what I'm imitating?"
Jolie groaned in exasperation.
Remember how I said I adore my little brother? Well that's a bit of an exaggeration. I love him of course, especially when he's sweet, but he can be pretty annoying sometimes.
"Come on! Are you mute or just plain stupid?"
"Let me guess.", I sighed. "You're a.. gorilla?"
He stopped in his tracks.
"Well, is that it?"
"No way, dude!" He shook his head as if in disappointment. "I was a gorilla serpent! Come on.. even YOU couldn't figure that out?"
Jolie and Bella seemed amused but I could beg to disagree.
"You are hopeless! What will we ever do with you.. But a word of advice, next time you have the burning desire to look like a fool, don't call an audience." I smirked at him as he flushed red. "Have you done your homework yet?"
"Umm.. about that.", he muttered.
He's adorable when he gets flustered.
"Come on then, you silly goose, let's get that out of the way before dinner, okay?"
I ushered him to his bedroom to fetch his books as I thought of how lucky we were to have each other. For me he's my sunshine on a rainy day and for him, he has a second mom in me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One month later..
Since I am a year ahead of Jolie and Bella, we go to different classes and periods. I had just had my last period and was waiting outside their sociology class to update them on the bad news. The bell went off and they were amusingly the first ones out, spotting me and gesturing to find a quiet space in the hallway.
"Tomorrow is the deadline to accept or reject NC State's offer, but I still haven't heard from Stanford yet! I'm starting to get really worried! What if I end up with nothing?!"
Bella, ever the wise one of the group, cut me off before I could freak out further.
"Shells, you need to chill. Today marks four weeks since you submitted the application. Besides, you could always go to UNC. After all, they accepted you and the deadline to accept or reject that offer isn't until next month, when you graduate."
It didn't exactly put my mind at ease.
"Except I have a scholarship that only covers a tenth of my tuition! I don't want to take on so much debt at seventeen!"
"Lots of kids take loans. I'm sure that you'll find a way to pay it back."
I tensed up and started trembling when I heard the familiar ding of a notification ringing from my pocket. Bella noticed my reaction,
"Oh my god, what is it Shells?"
Jolie scoffed, "Haven't you recognized the reaction yet, Bells? She gets like this every time her phone vibrates with an email alert, thinking it's from Stanford."
My heart began racing as I pulled out my phone. I took a deep breath in, opened my inbox and..
'Congratulations, Ms. Manzo! We are delighted to inform you that you've been accepted to participate in the Stanford Institutes..'
"Guys!! I'm in! Oh. My. God."
They rushed over at the news, fighting to see the screen for themselves.
"OH MY GOD!! I'M IN I'M IN!"
Bella was already jumping up and down and me and Jolie danced to celebrate, not caring at all who else was watching and possibly thinking we were insane.
"Guess who's going to Palo Alto!!"
I couldn't believe it. The only thing now was to tell my aunt and uncle.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Your uncle should be home any moment now."
I nodded at Aunt Gianna as I mentally prepared to break the news to the family.
Unlike my Papa, who created his own path into business, my Uncle Georgio carried on the family tradition of serving in the military. Part of the grudge between my Papa and my Uncle was the result of conflicts in the family that arose when my dad abandoned the family tradition. Regardless, Uncle Georgio is a proud member of the navy and humorously fits the many stereotypes that come with that.
I prayed that everyone would take the news alright..
He came into the room taking off his coat apologizing for his tardiness, muttering something about unexpected delays at work.
Aunt Gianna greeted him, "Honey, you're home!"
"It's nice to see you too, dolcezza."
They shared a sweet brief kiss before he stood next to her and addressed me,
"Principessa, tell me what the big news is! Did you get a bigger scholarship from UNC? I'm already so proud of you!"
He touchingly calls me Principessa because he knows my Papa used to call me that. He reminds me so much of what I remember of Papa.. not when he was suicidal, but my real Papa.
Ugh! I'm suddenly really nervous. I think that my Uncle will be shocked that I want to go to Stanford for this program and forgo UNC's offer. But I need to be confident if I'm going to convince them to let me go..
"Principessa.. is everything alright?"
Shoot, I must've taken too much time thinking.
"Of course it is! Everything is fine!" This was the moment. "In fact, I'm extremely excited because I got into a summer research program at Stanford!"
"Well, that's wonderful, Principessa! Congratulations!"
Aunt Gianna clapped along and I was relieved that at least the program was approved. But now came the hard part.
"Thank you! I'm hoping that if I like it enough.." Here goes nothing. "I might continue for a year and reapply to colleges next year to try for better schools."
My uncle stopped dead in his tracks.
"Wait what?"
Oops. There goes that.
Aunt Gianna was perplexed as she inquired, "What happened, darling? Weren't you going to join either NC State or UNC this fall? Why go so far away from home?"
"I haven't accepted either offer yet.." I admitted. "I- um.." I took a deep breath to collect myself. "I really want to go to Stanford! I never told you because I never thought I had a shot. But it's been my dream since.. like, forever. And researching it more now, I'm falling more and more in love with it. I want to reapply to colleges next year when my application will be stronger."
Secretly, of course, I also want to go because I want to revisit Matthew.. but I can't tell them that because Uncle probably thinks young love is "fickle" and "precarious". I know he'll say I shouldn't choose a school for a boy. But I love Stanford independent of Matthew and besides, Matthew's not "just a boy". I hoped they wouldn't link him to all of this.
"And you're sure that this decision has nothing to do with your affections for the Ruscuiti boy?"
Damn. What is with adults and their inconvenient x-ray vision abilities?
"Young lady, I'm waiting to hear why you would give up a perfectly good opportunity such as UNC for something that isn't guaranteed. Don't tell me that this is all because of a boy."
This was totally unexpected. Feigning ignorance or denying at this point, I knew was useless. I had to stand up for my point and admit it.
"So what if it is partly because of Matthew?", I raised my voice a tiny bit more than I should have from the frustration building inside me.
"Don't take that tone with me, young lady."
I meekly apologized. "Sorry, Uncle."
"But I don't understand what's so bad about Matthew being a part of why I would like to go to Stanford?"
"You should know better than to make such critical life decisions based on a boy. Principessa, you have to realize that me and your aunt love you so much. We truly want the very best for you. We want to keep you with a support system, make sure you're living safely, that sort of thing."
I knew he was right, and I wasn't mad at all, for his intentions were out of love clearly. I was just so desperate for this opportunity.
"I agree with your uncle, honey. It's just that this is such a shock to us."
It was her first words in the conversation.. my Aunt must be really surprised. I needed to respond maturely.
"I appreciate that, Uncle Georgio, but please trust that I'm mature enough to make the right decisions. I always learn from my mistakes. I'm never too shy to ask for help. I'm not reckless and I know how to cope with struggles and be safe. I'd be living by myself at NC State or UNC, right? Stanford is just a bit farther.. that's all."
"But being so far away from your family is no easy feat, especially after-"
I know what's coming next in this conversation: the traumatic loss of my parents. It's uncomfortable for everyone to discuss and besides, I fail to see the relevance.
"With all due respect, Uncle.. I will never be too far from you. I will talk to you every other day, visit often, text.. If anything, losing my Mamma and Papa made me more independent, not needier, so please don't worry about that."
He hummed in thought.
"Sweetheart.. most of all, I want to protect your heart from being broken-"
"My heart is not as fragile as you think just because of the things that have happened to me! And besides! Matthew won't break my heart. Even ignoring him, I'm not going there just to visit him. Stanford is a brilliant school and is the one that I want to go to."
I was starting to feel hopeless, and I couldn't help the tears that escaped as I felt all my bottled up frustration let go.
"Please let me just go to Stanford this summer! Let me just try out this summer at Stanford. If it isn't good for me, I promise I'll come back! Even though I'll have canceled my UNC and NC state attendance for this year, and won't be going to college if I come back, I'll be here at home I swear! You always tell me that life is waiting for me and that I shouldn't rush it. This is my chance to experience that. Either way, whether I spend my year at Stanford or here, I won't be going to college. But I will be doing something potentially productive this year at a world class lab, reconnecting with a great friend of mine, and discovering my fullest potential by getting better scholarships at better schools when I apply for college again next year." Desperation took hold in my voice. "Please, please, please! Don't make me miss out on this once in a lifetime opportunity!"
There was a silent moment of relief as I got out everything on my chest. My Uncle looked at me, processing everything I'd said and his eyes seemed to soften a bit.
"There, there Principessa. Please don't feel that way. Come.. give me a hug."
I slowly walked up to his open arms with him giving me a firm squeeze and my Aunt kissing my cheek.
"You're right that I always encouraged you to take a gap year. And I suppose I should trust you more.. at least for this summer."
I lit up almost instantly upon hearing the approval.
"But Stanford is so far away from here.. my goodness."
Just as I was racking my brain for what else I could possibly say to convince him, my Uncle let out a heavy exhale and looked to his side.
"Gianna.. I suppose we will finally make that long desired trip to California this year."
"OH MY GOOOOOOOD!" I was ecstatic. "THANK YOU SO MUCH!!"
I ran up and put an arm around both of them, thanking my lucky stars while still not fully believing that I would actually be going.
"I love you! And Aunt Gianna, I love you too!"
She chuckled, "I love you too, darling. And I'm so happy for you."
And so, one of the hardest conversations of my early life was navigated maturely, and to the best outcome possible.
My Aunt called up Teresa, much to her surprise and delight. When she found out that I was visiting that summer, and maybe living there for the next five years, she was elated. Talking on the phone with her again was really special, and it actually made both of us a little emotional. All of the precious memories from before suddenly came back to me. I remembered Mamma laughing with Teresa. I recalled evenings after school spent at her home. I relived the authentic and elaborate Italian dinners shared with my family. I remembered her delicious hot chocolate. And most of all I recall her constant warmth in welcoming me to her home. She loved me like a daughter and I, like a mother.
One memory in particular stood out the most prominently after speaking with Teresa.. I remembered the last hug I shared with her when I was leaving California, after I had been orphaned and reassigned to foster parents.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In those days, I wouldn't get out of one pink blouse. It was my Mamma's favorite. And to this day, I almost always wear my Mamma's crystal heart necklace. My Papa gave it to her on their anniversary, which was the day I was born. The ruby on the locket represented my birth month, July.
Matthew was at my side as she spoke to me. Teresa stroked my hair gently, "Sweetheart, I love you so much. I'll miss you and we have to keep in touch." I couldn't get over my sobs to reply. She pulled me closer, "But sweetie.. you have to listen to me here. Your Mamma is in heaven watching over her babies.. seeing you suffer. But she's helpless to heal your pain. So I will say what any mother would want her child to hear after she was gone. Listen to me, sweetheart." She gave me another kiss on my forehead.
"Be strong, my child. Be strong because every tear you shed rips your Mamma's heart in half-" Her voice broke. "I know it's hard, and it won't be easy. But no Mamma, especially not your beautiful Mamma, wants to see her baby cry.." Her own tears came tumbling out as she reached to dry mine. "I know I'm not following my own advice, but it's okay to grieve now, love. But I want you to remember, when I'm not there to hold you, to be strong. Be strong for me, if not for your Mamma. Crying by yourself won't help anyone. But talking about your feelings will."
Looking off into the distance, she cleared her throat before turning back to me, "And one day, do something great with that amazing brain of yours. Help find a cure for cancer. If that devil of an illness hadn't come to your Mamma, none of this would have happened."
I looked up into her soft brown eyes, not knowing at the time, the impact her words would have on me.
"Oh my baby.. I don't want to upset you more. But I won't see you in the near future, as much as it kills me, so I have to tell you this now. We can't change the past and undo what's been done. But we can make new futures, bright and hopeful."
And what she said next especially, struck a chord in me.
"Sweetheart.. I encourage you to take your pain and your gifted mind and do something absolutely brilliant with it. You just have to find it in you to work hard and make that difference." She gave me a comforting smile, "Your Mamma was always so proud of you. Imagine how proud she will be if you're helping millions of others. When you are sad or hopeless, just think about that, love. Remember my words, and be strong.. And if you ever need to talk or if you are ever lonely or need advice, please call me. I'm always going to be here for you."
Blinking away the tears, I nodded up to her, feeling a small fragment of piece that I hadn't felt in weeks.
"You have a mother in me, my child. I love you so much.. so very much."
And yet, despite my utter misery, I found some hope and warmth and love. I will never forget the relief I felt to be wrapped in Teresa's arms. It felt like home. For a moment, I could forget that I was an orphan. To this day, I am reduced to tears as I think about that night. Every aspect of it was touching but sad, especially the very end.
Because as I left the manor for the very last time, Matthew played me a beautiful but heart-wrenching farewell song on the grand piano in the hall, tears silently dripping from his eyes. I kissed his cheek as I left. His cheeks turned red, but he didn't look at me. He just kept playing the piano with admirable focus, his face stony and drawn. Even though the only movement was that of his fingers and the tears rolling down his face, that was the most passionate performance I had seen him deliver. You could see the pain and the desperation in his hollowed eyes and his set jaw. There was something about the urgency in his fingers as they glided across the keys, translating his pain into music, and the fierceness in his eyes, that all spoke volumes regarding the emotions churning in his heart.
"Be strong".. these powerful but simple words have echoed through my head during every difficult time I've encountered. They served as a sort of mantra through all the rough patches.. when I was mourning my parents, hurt at my foster parents and beyond. Even to this day, I recall her soothing but firm voice ordering me to 'be strong'.
When I was orphaned, everyone else pretended nothing had happened, or otherwise they would whisper about me and then look at me softly as if I was something to be pitied. The worst reaction came from those who avoided talking about my parents at all. With them I felt as though my parents' memory and my pain were insignificant. Of course, I know that they were simply uncomfortable with and unsure of how to deal with my loss, but those reactions were insensitive, no matter how accidental.
With Aunt Teresa, it was so different. She talked about them and what happened so freely. She gave it the weight and momentum it deserved. And yet she was delicate, respectful and so compassionate. She gave me sound advice, some tough love but lots of hugs and kisses. We shared stories, we shared laughter and we shared tears. Even when I moved in with my foster parents, she constantly checked up on me. But then they subtly discouraged her contacting me by ignoring her calls, and she eventually gave up. But while I was in touch with Aunt Teresa, she was like a firm anchor to me during that horrific time. She kept me sane and made me reason through my pain. She gave me a new purpose and new hope, and she gave me strength and wisdom.
And the oddest thing was, it was almost as though she had felt this way before too. But I never asked her who it was that she had lost, and she herself never brought it up. It was like an unspoken agreement.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One month later..
I wore my Mamma's necklace while I graduated from high school. I felt as though this was a way for me to keep my parents close during this amazing moment. I had the honor of being crowned as this year's valedictorian and making a speech.
"..And you've all played a critical contribution in making our community one of learning and fashioning our journey to be one of achieving. And the world better watch out, because we're coming to change it! So let's give each other a round of applause for being an exceptional set of people ready to make a difference in our own unique ways! Thank you and God bless!"
After giving my speech, celebrating and taking lots of pictures, high school was finally over for me, and summer was starting. I was so excited to go to Stanford that the days just seemed to fly. But I was careful to try and enjoy the time I had left with my best friends and family. Because all too soon, and yet not soon enough, I was on my way to soak up sunny California.
I stood in my room, just having straightened out my hair completely. I just like it so much better this way. I started contemplating what to wear for the flight. Teresa said that Matthew won't be at home when I arrive because he will be gone to Costa Rica for a volunteer project, but I still wanted to look nice.. just in case, you know, if he video calls his Mom or something? I finally settled for a casual but comfortable t-shirt and jeans combo, and threw on a denim jacket on top.
"Honey, are you ready? Your flight leaves in two and a half hours.. we need to go!"
I ran down to where my family stood, apologizing for taking so much time. We quickly hopped in the car and hurried down to the airport.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Come on, kids! I know you don't want to say goodbye to Shelley, but quit dawdling!"
Aunt Gianna called out as everyone slowly trailed behind her, feeling somber already. I came back from the counter holding my luggage in one hand and ticket in the other.
"Okay, I just finished checking in and I've got my boarding pass!"
"Well, I suppose this is it.", she said contently. "I'm so proud of you."
It made me feel so happy to hear that. "Aww don't cry, Aunt Gianna! You're making me tear up too."
"I will miss you though."
Jolie butt in, "Oh, please Mom! This isn't a funeral, we'll visit at the end of this summer, right Shells?"
"Of course!!", I replied enthusiastically while sneaking a look at Stephen from the side of my vision. I noticed he was awfully subdued than usual.. he must be taking this hard since this would be his first time without me. I was surprised he's not pulling an act of some sort.
"You'll be alright without me, right, Stevie Bear?"
He was immediately flustered and was quick to shut it down.
"Of course I will be! Why wouldn't I be? It's not like I won't see you again." He pulled a mischievous grin. "Even though that would be nice.."
Yep, and now he's acting tough. That's more like the Stephen I know.
"The feeling's mutual, baby bro. But in all seriousness, of course I will see you again, silly. You can't get rid of me that easily! I love you so much, you moron."
He said he loves me too.. well, mumbled it under his breath really. I couldn't not tease him about that.
"Did you say something? I couldn't quite hear that!"
He crossed his arms and looked back sharply, "I was just reviewing all the fun stuff I get to do now that Queen Killsport will be gone."
I was about to protest when Bella assured, "Don't worry, Shells, we promise to take good care of him! He'll be the same obnoxious brat you left behind, guaranteed!"
Jolie laughed and added "We can't promise he won't grow a few inches though!"
'Boarding for flight 4344 to San Francisco will begin shortly.'
The announcer over the speaker surprised me.
"That's my flight! I still have to go through security and get to my gate!"
I was about to rush off when Aunt Gianna held me back and chuckled,
"Relax sweetie, your flight is 5683. And that's not boarding for another hour."
Jolie piped up, "Oooh! 5-6-8-3, huh? That spells L-O-V-E on a numeric keypad! Shells is taking a one way ticket to loooove!"
I blushed furiously as I swatted at Jolie while the others laughed.
"Sorry! I couldn't resist."
"Ha ha, very funny.", I said dryly.
But the coincidence had my heart racing.. not that I'd ever admit it.
"Well, I guess I should really be going now. I could spend forever with you guys like this, but I don't want to have another scare."
They nodded and started walking me to the direction of my gate number.
"I'll miss you guys so much! Especially hanging out with you two."
Bella sniffed, "Awww, me too!"
"Me three!"
Jolie swept us both up into a tight group hug that I had to peel myself away from, or else they might have never let me go.
"I'll call as soon as I board the plane and when we land. See you all in a few months when you visit! Ciao!"
They waved me into security and soon I was off to fly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It took a long time for the plane to arrive in San Francisco. Coast to coast flights are no fun, but the view I had before we were about to land simply took my breath away. I could see a beautiful city on the California shore, and I was itching to land on the ground I grew up on as a child.
I came out into arrivals and noticed how light it was outside, as it was still daytime from the earlier time zone. I should be tired, but I couldn't stop myself from shaking I was so excited to be here. I walked toward the baggage claim area, where I would pick up my bags before being taken to the Ruscuiti's home by their personal chauffeur.
I pulled out my phone to let my family know that I landed. And then I started to text Teresa when all of a sudden..
A man with flat shiny black hair and deep-set eyes, wearing a camo jacket, jumped in front of me, yelling,
"Don't scream! Or else I WILL shoot you. Move forward, we're going out the exit."
I was petrified. Was I supposed to listen to him? He couldn't shoot me in public but if I don't listen it would make him angry. I took one step forward, hoping that at least following his instructions would somehow open up an opportunity for me to escape.
"Good girl. Now just keep listening to me, or else."
His hand inched closer to where I could see the outline of his gun.
"We thought you were dead. But you squirmed out alive, huh? The boss will be shocked but he'll eventually take care of you, and then I'll get a huge reward."
I was going to die. At that moment I knew that I had to escape, I was better off in public. I needed to call for help.
"HELP! HELP!!"
But my voice was hardly more than a squeak since my throat was so dry. Frantically looking around me, I saw that everything and everyone appeared unnaturally frozen, but I had no time to analyze that because of my panic. The man looked down at his phone as it rung and began to text back. As my heart beat like a hummingbird in my chest, I made the split-second decision to run.
After running and making a sharp turn into a corridor, hoping I had lost the man, I ran some more, still noticing how everything around me seemed frozen, but wondering if it was only due to my charged state of panic. I turned another corner only to realize I had gone around in a loop and spotted the man sprinting towards me from the other side. As he caught up and cornered me, he roared,
"I'm done playing games with you, little girl. This ends NOW!"
I was already exhausted from running and the panic I felt. Before I could gain my senses, I saw the man pull out his revolver. I stood there frozen. In slow motion, I could see him raise his gun. My life was running before my eyes.
This was the end.
