1 Asymmetry Or Symmetry?

Soul Eater (Japanese: ソウルイーター, Hepburn: Sōru Ītā) is a Japanese manga series written and illustrated by Atsushi Ohkubo. Set at the "Death Weapon Meister Academy", the series revolves around three teams, each consisting of a weapon meister and (at least one) weapon that can transform into a humanoid. Trying to make the latter a "death scythe" and thus fit for use by the academy's headmaster Shinigami, the personification of death, they must collect the souls of 99 evil humans and one witch, in that order; otherwise, they will have to start all over again.

For more information please visit https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soul_Eater_(manga)

I do not own Soul Eater. This is a fanfic. Fan-fiction is fiction written by a fan of, and featuring characters from, a particular TV series, movie, etc.

I do however own my original characters featured in this Novel.

I mean for this to be in the genre of action, dark fantasy, and as a dark comedy.

Noire's p.o.v

"You betrayed me! Get up and explain yourself Noire!" I opened my eyes to a very angry Fade shaking me. What the hell?!?

"What are you talking about?"

"This!" She gestured to my room. I looked around not really caring.

"What are you talking ab- What the heck! I- I didn't do this! I promise!"

Everything in my room was arranged symmetrically. She dragged me out of bed by my collar. "Then who did?"

"Maybe... Kid?"

"Oh, I forgot about him.... Ok, I'll be right back." She smiled cheerfully and stalked down the hallway. Not ten minutes later I heard Kid screaming.

"My room! It's... I can't even say the vile word! Liz! Patti!"

Fade came back into my room. "I think the word is asymmetrical brother. Now I need to fix your room."

She walked over to my bookshelf and started organizing it her way. "I can do that myself. Go eat something before Kid comes for you and sentences you to your room again."

"Oops, I forgot that he likes to do that to me when I mess with symmetry."

"Fade! Where are you hiding?!?" Kid's voice was getting closer to my room.

"Quick! Hide in my closet!"

"Why?"

"My room isn't going to be a battleground, and I just woke up, so I am in no mood for this!

Fade's p.o.v

"Yeah, ok, great idea." I whispered and hurried into the closet. Oh no...it's...it's arranged by color! "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I pushed my way out and right into Kid's arms, and he screamed back.

"You are dead!" he told me as he pushed away. I looked towards Noire.

"YOU LET HIM IN!"

"He pushed me! Like I would let him in! He's a guy! This is my ROOM! I'm on her side this time Kid! GET OUT!" As she told me that, I noticed Liz and Patti standing in the doorway. Kid grabbed a lock full of my hair and tugged me out the room. DAMN HIM!

"You'll pay! I'm going to make you clean it up symmetrically to the very inch. Then in your room you go!" Noooooooooo, not my room!

"Never!" I kicked away from Kid and ran down the hall knocking over a vase, and he stopped right by it after chasing me and screamed, starting to have a nosebleed. I turned around and chuckled to myself then burst out laughing evilly as I turned, going to the kitchen. He fell over fainting. He's such a baby. A big one in fact.

"Noire, I won this time! He's down for the countdown. What's the score for this morning, eh?" This is how every morning goes. The reason why he is three hours late to school every morning. That's right. All because of me. Kid is my wonderful twin brother and nothing is better than messing with his symmetrical problem.

"Well, for the past week... let's see... that's Fade: 15 and Kid: 17" How dare he get two points ahead of me! "including that time when he shot your face in your sleep" THAT DEFINITLY SHOULDN'T BE COUNTED, I WAS UNCONCIOUS! "and called you asymmetrical garbage." AND I SHALL GET HIM FOR CALLING ME GARBAGE! "For this morning... Fade: 2 and Kid 2 and one very tired Noire!" There is no way he could have gotten me twice this morning....

"How did he get me twice?!?"

"My room and my closet!" Damn him. A groan from the symmetrical trash bag made me stop as I looked over my shoulder. There he is, sitting up. I'M DOOMED.

"Patti, Liz... let's teach my twin a lesson why she shouldn't mess with me AND RESPECT SYMMETRY!" He rose to his feet, and I screamed running to my room in fear.

"Right," they both called, and I'm pretty sure I heard them transform...I'm so screwed. He won't come in my room, it's too scary for him. He'd get a nosebleed as soon as he walked in... Wait a minute. This isn't my room. I'M IN...I'M IN...KID'S ROOM! AND HE FIXED IT SO QUICKLY. Dang he's faster than I thought. That bastard.

"Hey Fade. You know your in my room right?" he asked as he kicked the door in, and I backed away slowly shaking my head no, then he stepped in but stopped. Wait... What's he doing? He turned around and screamed. Ahhhh, so pretty...The door is hanging off its hinges in a perfect asymmetrical way. I'm in love! "Oh no! I'm sorry precious! What have I done?!? I hate you Fade! Look what you made me do!" What a cry baby. I didn't make him do it!

"Are you serious! Get your butt up, and teach her a lesson!" Liz or Patti started shouting at him as he dropped to his knees crying. Just how I prefer to start off my mornings, winning. He won't get up for another hour. I stepped over him and turned, looking into his eyes.

"I win Kid. See you around." I laughed and turned around, heading towards the kitchen in a bit of a hurry. What if he gets up in less then ten minutes? I walked into the kitchen and saw Noire making me pancakes just the way I prefer them, asymmetrically. "We're leaving after breakfast. Kid's gonna kill me when he stops crying like the big baby he is."

"Your fights keep giving me insomnia" I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT SHE JUST TOLD ME. "when I hear you two yelling at each other and throwing things!" COULD THAT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH THAT BIG WORD SHE JUST SAID? Maybe I should look that word up later.... How would you even spell it? "How am I supposed to get any sleep around here?!?" That's the point, you don't, or he will prank us, we only sleep when he's in school at that stupid academy I have nothing to do with. Why would he want to go there? "Honestly! So... he's being a big baby now? That's gotta be cute to watch." She thinks its cute?!? Traitor! "Oh well, your fights have their perks when I get to see him crying like that. It's like sweet revenge for all those times he cleaned my room without my permission, but then again, why sacrifice sleep for a cute image that could last longer if you took a picture and let it go viral? Or even a video of him crying?" Did them both. "I would listen to him cry at night if someone did that...." I'm surprised she hasn't already done that in her free time. "Hey, I know! Here's my camera! Go film it, and post it on the internet!"

I looked at her with a blank face. She's got a great idea. Too bad we did that last week. Well, I did that, but I won't tell her. I think she has some creepy crush on Kid. Oh well. I've got a better plan in mind for us. Here is a secret nobody knows but me about my brother.

"Nah, I've got a better idea! Let's take a picture of him tonight while he's sleeping."

"Why?" she asked me curiously.

"He sucks his thumb in his sleep, both of them."

"Wouldn't that mess up his teeth?" I never really thought about that. "It would make his teeth crooked and asymmetrical. Wait... why did you tell me that? I don't want to know about his sleeping habits! Ewww! That's just gross! He touched Liz and Patti without washing his hands this morning! Holy crap! He touched my stuff after he slept! I'm going to disinfect everything including Liz and Patti's hands! Hold on... how do you know this? Are you watching him in his sleep, adoring his stripes or something? Kid will kill you for real this time if he finds out that you actually are! We need to move out of the country and hide you before he catches on to your little secret!"

"What secret? Fade, what are you eating?!? How dare you?!?" OH MY LORD, HE IS RIGHT BEHIND ME. "You eat asymmetrical pancakes when I'm not looking?!? I'm going to kill you, and then bring you back before Father finds out, then brainwash you to love symmetry! You will become like me! This asymmetrical love ends now! Liz, Patti! Wait... where did they go? I thought they were right behind me...." OH THANK GOD. Their my saviors this time. Hopefully he will forget.

A note was falling behind him. "Kid, behind you." He turned around and picked up the note. After a few minutes, he started ranting.

"What do they think they are doing going to school without me?!? I'm going to have a talk with them when I find them! Fade, when I get back, I'm going to murder you in perfect symmetry!" Not PERFECT symmetry Kid. You aren't capable of it because of your stripes in your hair. It would mess up the image, but not for me! If I am to die, I will die asymmetrically! Beautiful beautiful asymmetry! He started running towards the front door. When he gets back, he probably will forget all about murdering me.

"Hey Kid! Your shirt is messed up," Noire shouted after him. Thank you Noire! Kid screamed and started fixing his shirt as he pulled out that flying skateboard of his and left our sight.

"Haha, nice one Noire. Couldn't say it better myself." We held up our hands and high fived each other. I waited as she finished cooking the pancakes, and we drenched them in syrup and ate. Afterwards, I told her to get some rest and that we would leave in a few hours. I washed the plates and stacked them up onto the shelves then carried on going upstairs and taking a shower. What evil plan shall I plan up next? Maybe I should go through with it and film him sucking his thumbs. Am I even winning still? I couldn't keep track, maybe Noire did. I can't believe she would think I would stalk my own brother and watch him sleep. It was just one time, I couldn't help myself! He snored so loudly! He's the reason why I never got much sleep and still don't. Many don't know, but we loved our differences between each other at one time. Back when we were toddlers, we shared a nursery together. Everything changed though. When I accidentally snapped the button off of his teddy bear. Sure it was an easy fix, but he's never been the same since. He's such a cry baby. Yet, that is a whole other story. I watched him sleep when I was awoken by his snores from down the hall and snuck in figuring I'd shut him up some way, but then I saw him sucking his thumbs like the big baby he is! Symmetrically!

Wait a minute...I just put the dishes up symmetrically! I screamed loudly and wrapped a towel around myself as I hurried downstairs to make them asymmetrical.

Noire's p.o.v

Did I just hear something? Eh, guess not. If it was Fade, I would know because she doesn't scream like a girl off of those horror shows that I find Patti watching in the middle of the night while her sister is sleeping. She screams like a banshee! Ok, maybe not exactly like a banshee.... More like Kid-just-woke-up-to-an-asymmetrical-room-and-Patti-helped-Fade-do-it-then-he-was-forced-to-eat-asymmetrical-waffles-off-of-asymmetrical-plates-and-then-he-found-out-that-Lord-Death-was-aysmmetrical-under-his-mask-that-he-keeps-on-all-the-time-then-he-broke-the-most-symmetrical-thing-in-the-world-like-Anubus-and-then-woke-up-to-find-out-that-he-dreamed-it-and-then-saw-Fade-with-her-asymmetrical-hair. Wait, I overdid it. Oh well, I am not taking that back! Heck, I might even tell Kid that before he goes to bed to make him dream about it, and then tell Liz a ghost story on top of that to get her to shriek like no tomorrow to wake Kid up, so he fails a test.... I need to stop watching Sherlock Holmes before I make a plan for everything. Seriously, this is getting out of hand here.... I should tell Kid that sucking his thumbs is going to make his mouth asymmetrical and that he will be the laughingstock of the DWMA. What is the DWMA anyway? Hey, Fade made the plates symmetrical. Let me fix it for her, so she doesn't faint when she sees it.

I fixed the plates and started to go upstairs, but Fade came running down the stairs in a towel, knocking me aside as she ran past. "What are you doing? Oh my gosh, you put your towel on symmetrically! Let me take a picture to send to Kid, so he forgives you for earlier!" I pulled out my phone.

"Ah, the towel! No don't you dare take that picture or else!"

"Too late!" I ran up the stairs and went into the most symmetrical room in the house, Kid's room. Hah! He already fixed the door! No way is she going to come in here! Ok Kid... have fun with this picture. I hit send as Fade came in the room and fainted. "Oooh, I want to take another!" I snapped another and sent it to Kid again. Wait... What have I done?!? If I step out of this room, she'll kill me! Wait, I'm her weapon. The only way she could kill me is if she wielded something else like a kitchen knife. Eh, who cares? She's so puny that she won't be able to do anything anyway, but she is so cute that I can't help but want to be around! So cute!

"I'm... going to kill you! After I get out of this room." She crawled out and started telling me to get my butt out of her brother's room.

"Never!"

"GET OUT OF HIS ROOM!"

"No!"

"Oh Noire.... I have something interesting to tell you."

"I'm not listening!"

"After I messed up his room, he cleaned up everything using the hands he didn't wash! He passed out on this very floor without washing his hands!" EWWWWWWW! I'll jump out the window instead! I ran to the window and threw it open. "What are you doing?" Then, I jumped, landing in the bushes. "Noire! You crazy symmetrical butthead. I hope you know that when I'm through with you, you'll only be thinking about asymmetrical things. You traitor! Kid just sent me pictures of myself a few mintues ago! Your dead! You symmetrical traitor I'm gonna make you turn and bend you a billion times, you symmetrical biotchhhhhhh. Get back here! You incredible symmetrical spy. How could you do this to me?!? I'm not gonna talk to you instead...you symmetrical pervert!"

"Hey guess what Fade! I sent it to Liz and Patti too along with Lord Death! Lord Death said that when he gets home, he's going to give Kid permission to teach you how to be adorably symmetrical! Ok, I lied about that last part.... I didn't lie about sending it to Liz, Patti, and your dad! You looked so adorable trying to get my phone from me that I couldn't help myself, but I took a picture when you fainted too! Take that! Wait... what did you call me? Symmetrical? I- I can't believe you said that! I'm going shopping, and you can't come with me! I was even going to spend Kid's money because I got ahold of his wallet, but I'm going to use my own now! I'm not going to talk to you anymore! Forget about your asymmetrical pancakes! This morning was your last bit! Cook your own food, or get Kid to! I don't care! You know what! I don't think I will come back! Just forget about it! I HATE YOU FOR SAYING THAT! Go away and leave me alone for the rest of your life! Maybe I'll die before you, but don't you dare come to my funeral or ten miles near my grave!"

"NOIRE COME BACK! YOU CAN BLAME IT ALL ON ME! I didn't mean to say all that, but it is cute that your a symmetrical pervert. Come back to me when your done pouting. I'm gonna go make popcorn and watch a movie."

"Kid bought symmetrical popcorn bags and threw out your asymmetrical popcorn last night! And I'm not coming back! NEVER! I'm going shopping, and you can't stop me! Forget about me because I ain't coming back!" I stormed off in the direction of the little shops lining the streets, but then I realized something. She called me cute. What the heck could she mean by that? Oh well, that's behind me. I just need to contact my mom or something to get out of here. I whipped out my phone and dialed my mom.

"Hey mom?"

"Yes sweetie?"

"Can I come home? I've had enough of the twins."

"Of course you can! I'll meet you at the ice cream shop!"

"Thanks mom." I hung up and went back to put Kid's wallet in the mailbox. There. He can get it when he gets back. Why did I even take it? Oh yeah... Fade wanted me to. I ran to my meeting place with my mom. Oh my gosh, I feel so free right now! I should have done this when I learned what they were like! Yay! I get to see my mom again, and I can move back in! She never supported me moving into Gallows Manor with Fade, but I wanted to be closer to her in case she needed me. I need to stop thinking about her! I reached the shop and found my mother waiting.

"Hey there! Ready to go home? I bought you an ice cream cone while I was waiting! It's your favorite!" She handed me a mint and chocolate chip ice cream cone, and we headed home together.

~Time Skip~

It was late in the afternoon when I heard the doorbell rang. "Mom! Can you get it?"

"Yeah!" I was in my room playing music. I wonder how she is doing right now.... Kid probably murdered her already. Pfft! That would be funny to watch as she would probably point out right before she died that he killed her asymmetrically. Oh well. I closed my eyes and played with my hair as I turned over onto my back on my bed. My door busted open scaring me half to death.

"What the hell were you thinking?!? You left my sister alone in the manor, and now she is crying asymmetrically! She even hugged me when I got home because she missed you! I should murder you right here and now!"

"Calm down Kid!" Holy crap! Kid is in my room! And that's not the best part! He has Liz and Patti in weapon form! How does he know where my mom lives?!? Is he a stalker or something?!? That's not what I should be worried about! Kid is mad at me! Oh crud! Goodbye world! I won't miss you one bit! Hurry up and kill me! Don't drag it out!

"I'm not going to calm down! The manor is a wreck, and dad is going to be home soon! She ripped my toilet paper up after I took the time to make it perfectly symmetrical, and it's because Noire made her upset!"

"Kid! Think rationally! If you kill her, you'll make it worse! Your dad will be furious that you took a human soul!"

"I'm not going to make you eat her soul!"

"Oh, well, what about your sister!"

"Who cares anymore.... this room... is asymmetrical. Who could live like this?!? Ahhh! I must fix it! Noire, you stay right there!" Hell no! I got up and ran out the door. "Mom! If I die tonight, make sure that my tombstone says that I was killed by an asymmetrical bastard!"

"You wouldn't dare!" Kid followed me as I ran down the street.

"Stay away from meeeeee!"

"Take back what you said!"

"Never! I'm not going to take back something that is 100% true!"

"I'm gonna kill you!"

"No you won't!" He started shooting at me. I take that back. He will kill me! Heeeelp! He really is crazy! Wait, how did Fade get him to come get me? I thought they hated each other.... Is Fade dead? Did she trade her soul to Kid to get him to kill me? No, she wouldn't give her soul to a symmetrical loving lunatic! Not Fade! Not in a million years! "Can't we talk about this Kid?"

"Die you asymmetrical lover!" He finally hit me with one of his shots. Owwwww. That really hurts! Damn it Kid!

"Just stay down. Don't get back up."

"K- Kid."

"What?"

"Your stripes... are asymmetrical."

"No! I'm asymmetrical garbage! I should die! I can't even kill one person or keep the manor perfectly symmetrical! Not even my own room! I'm filthy reaper scum! Throw me out on garbage day!" I got up and started walking away the best I could. I bought some time. Now I need to buy the first ticket to out of here, and change my cellphone number, so they can't call me. I've had enough. Lord Death will just have to find a replacement.