11 Curse of the Cross-Eyed Moose

Sticks the Badger smiled to herself as she collected water in a bucket. Hearing grunting noises, the female badger turned around to see a moose with its eyes crossed, staring at her.

"MOOSE!" Sticks screamed as she ran off in fright, leaving a confused moose.

.....................................

At Amy's house, Penny watched as Sonic, Amy, Tails, and Knuckles did a hold-your-breath contest.

"Ready?" Sonic asked. "This time for the record. Penny, set the timer!"

"Aye aye, sir!" Penny smirked as she pressed the button on the watch. For a few moments, all was peaceful, until Sticks broke into the house, screaming about a moose. Startled, Tails and Knuckles lost. Knuckles glared at Sticks. "Sticks! I was this close to winning a pointless game that has no significance! Thanks for nothing!"

"I saw a moose!" Sticks said, looking paranoid as ever.

Everyone stared at her. Sonic and Amy kept playing the game.

"A CROSS EYED MOOSE!!" Sticks screamed.

"So?" Tails asked flatly.

Sticks growled. "Crossing paths with a cross eyed moose brings a curse upon the moose crosser and a non moose cross friends! Don't you people know anything about science?!"

"Sticks, I don't think that's science." Penny said, still looking at the stop watch.

"Um, Sticks, curses aren't real." Tails added. Sticks was already on a roll, though. "Then how come you just lost the breath holding contest?"

Knuckles gasped. "The curse! It all makes sense now!" He whimpered, clinging his head. Penny just shook her head and rolled her eyes.

"You can doubt me," Sticks said. "But I'll protect you anyway. Because I'm a good friend! And it distracts me from the government agents who are replacing my plants with violins!" She looked back and forth, and yelled, "That's right! I'm on to you, buddy!"

And just like that, the paranoid female badger walked out the door and slammed it, causing Amy's vase to fall and break. That caused Amy to loose the contest. "Ah! My vase!" She cried.

"I win!" Sonic said happily, letting out his breath.

"Like always." Penny smirked with another eye roll, high fiving Sonic.

Knuckles looked thoughtful. "Hmmm. Maybe the curse broke the vase?"

"Yeah." Sonic smirked. "The curse of the lunatic badger!"

"Uh oh!" Knuckles gasped. "Now there are two curses!"

.......................................

The next day.....

Amy smiled as she walked to her door, her bag in hand. When she tried to open the door though, she curiously couldn't open it. When she finally budged it with all her might, she looked surprised and annoyed to see huge animal traps outside her door. She sighed as she called everyone else.

"Hey, Tails, is your house....."

"Surrounded by Sticks's crazy traps?" Tails answered. "Yeah. Sonic, Penny, what's up with you?"

"Just hanging around." Sonic said flatly, eating his sandwich. Turned out that Sticks's trap had set him off his feet for once.

"Yeah, and I'm just playing netting." Penny growled as she tried to get out of a net that surrounded her.

"No, I haven't noticed anything." Knuckles said. He looked down and realized that he was in one of Sticks's crazy animal traps. Knuckles scratched his head. "Actually, now that you've mentioned it...."

................................

Having enough of dealing with Sticks's crazy traps, Penny, Sonic, and everyone else went to talk to Sticks about her paranoid state. However, before they could reach the door, no one was surprised when a net fell over them.

"This is getting old." Amy sighed.

"After this, I don't want to see another net in my life!" Penny grumbled.

Sonic nodded. "Yeah. And I didn't even get a sandwich this time!"

Hearing Sticks's call, the gang turned around to see Sticks now standing in front of them. The paranoid badger girl smiled at them as she released them from the net. "Okay, I know what you're thinking." She said. "BUT EVIL SPIRITS DIDN'T SET THOSE TRAPS! I DID! To protect you!"

"From.... dangerous door knocking?" Tails asked in annoyance, putting his hands on his hips.

Sticks shook her head. "No!" She snapped. "For the after mentioned evil spirits! Weren't you paying attention? They already bad news, baby! They'll eat your souls, chew them up and spit them out!"

"This curse is scary and disgusting." Knuckles cringed.

"Sticks, is there maybe a less intrusive way to keep us all safe from this curse?" Penny asked the badger.

Sticks got into story mode. "Well, legend has it that if we find the monkey with a white stripe on its back, and a tail shaped like a W!"

"Shaped like a w?" Penny and Tails asked together, confused.

Sticks continued. "Do you mind? Now where was I.... Only that monkey could move the curse!" She smiled at them. "So what's it going to be? Traps or monkey?"

"Monkey." Penny said, raising her hand.

Everyone stared at her.

"What?" The human girl asked.

............................................

Soon, Penny and the others found themselves walking through the forest to get to the curse removing monkey. "Is this really the easiest path?" Sonic asked. "Safer then... I don't know?" He pointed to a safe path, with sunny skies and a fruit stall, along with arrows to show you the way.

"Hello?!" Sticks snapped. "The curse will get us if we're out in the open! This path is hidden from bad luck! And volcanoes! And cursquitoes!"

"And reason, and logic, snack machines..." Tails said, pointing them out with his fingers.

"I'm all for playing it safe, but..." Knuckles began, but looked down to realize that he was sinking feet first in quicksand. He looked at his friends. "A little help?"

..................................

Soon, Penny and the others finally made it out of the forest. Sticks smiled proudly to herself. They had finally reached the cabin of the curse removing monkey!

"We made it!" She said with a smile. She looked at her friends. "Good thing we took the safe path!"

Penny groaned as she walked next to Sonic. The two friends were covered head to toe in dirt, Penny had a scratch on her shoulder, and everyone else just looked plain awful.

"Yeah." Knuckles grumbled in annoyance as he hopped up in a fish. He glared at Sticks. "Good thing!"

Sticks knocked the door, and a monkey with the exact discription that Sticks told her friends appeared at the door, and to Penny's surprise, the monkey had a tail shaped like a w, just like Sticks predicted!

"Excuse me!" Sticks said with a smile. "We uh..."

"Let me guess." The monkey said, raising his hands. "You saw a Cross Eyed Moose, and now you think there's a curse?"

"Yes!" Sticks said with a smile. "I..."

"Well, there is!" The monkey snapped. "On ME! My curse is nincompoops like you see that thing and bother me! But I am out of the curse breaking buisness!"

And he slammed the door.

"That went well." Sonic said, grabbing Penny's hand. "Now it's time to go home."

"And get cleaned up," Penny grumbled, flicking off a caterpillar.

Sticks, being the paranoid coop, started pounding the door with all of her might, wild fear in the badger's eyes. "NO!!" She screamed. "I'LL BE CURSED FOREVER!"

Penny, Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, and Amy sighed in annoyance.

"HELP ME! PLEASE! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!"

The monkey opened up the door, looking seriously annoyed. "Are you going to keep pounding on my door until I help you?"

"Pretty much." Sticks said.

"Ugh. Why did I become a curse breaker?" The monkey grumbled in annoyance. "I should've been a demonologist like my brother." He sighed, then looked at Sticks. "All right, all right, all right! I'll break one more curse!"

"Thank you!" Sticks said in excitement, clasping her hands. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Don't make me regret my decision!" The monkey snapped.

"Sorry!" Sticks said. "Sorry, sorry, sorry!"

Noticing the monkey glaring in annoyance at her, Sticks apologized softly one last time.

"Now then!" The monkey said with a smile. "If you want me to lift the curse, you and your friends must prove yourselves worthy!"

"How?" Sonic asked.

"You will be given a series of tasks that will prove your hearts are pure!" The monkey smiled. "If you succeed, I will free you from the Curse of the Cross-Eyed Moose!" He said, crossing his eyes and wiggling his fingers spookily. He looked at Team Sonic. "But I warn you. Many have tried and many have failed!"

"We'll do it!" Sonic said, zooming over. "One hundred percent Sonic guarantee!"

"Here's a list!" The monkey said, handing Sonic a piece of paper. Penny looked over Sonic's shoulder, glancing curiously at the list. "Toodles!"

"Uh, before you go," Knuckles called, hopping up to the monkey, still in the fish. "Could you mind taking a look at this rash?" He whimpered. "I think I', allergic to fish saliva."

"THEN GET OUT OF THE FISH!" The monkey yelled in pure annoyance.

.............................................

Penny frowned suspiciously as she stood next to Sonic, helping him pick avocadoes.

"Picking avocadoes proves our hearts are pure?" Sonic asked in confusion, popping out of the bushes.

"What do we have to pick to prove that avocadoes are pure?" Knuckles asked, holding an avocado. He gasped. "Oh, man! I just blew my own mind!"

"KABOOM!" Penny smirked, imitating an explosion.

Sonic and Knuckles stared at her.

"What?" Penny asked again.

"If this is what he wants in order to break the curse, then we should do it, no questions asked!" Amy said with a smile.

.....................................

"Now we have to squeeze lemons?" Amy asked.

"Technically, you're asking a question." Tails pointed out.

"Technically, ZIP IT!" Amy snapped.

...............................

"Search the forest fort the ripest tomatoes...?" Sonic asked. Sticks grabbed his arm and pointed to a bush with ripe tomatoes.

............................

Tails read the last item. "Then crush to a paste with the mightiest rocks on the mountain...?"

"Wait a minute!" Sonic growled in realization.

.............................

"You had us make guacamole!" Sonic growled, handing a bowl of guacamole to the monkey.

"And it took you long enough!" The monkey said, dipping a chip into the paste and popping it in his mouth.

"I hope this proves us worthy." Sticks said. "Curse form otherwise."

"Eh, not quite." The monkey said. "You must also..." He zoomed off and came back holding a basket of clothes. "Cleanse these garments in the purest river in the...."

"Fine." Sonic grumbled. "We'll do your laundry, too!"

.........................................

Soon, Penny found herself over a laundry board in the river, soaping the laundry and washing it.

Tails sighed next to her. "I'm starting to think that marmoset is the curse!" He said, whipping his head.

"I agree." Penny grumbled.

.............................

Hearing the door knock, the monkey smiled to himself as he walked up to the door. His eyes widened with surprise to see Eggman.

"I'm here about the Curse of the Cross Eyed Moose." Eggman announced.

"I'M OUT OF THE CURSE BUISNESS!" The monkey yelled in pure annoyance. He was about to close the door when Eggman stopped him. "Well, I don't believe in curses. But my encountances suggested that I diversify my evil business. So, I'm getting a curse removal! And you're coming to work for me!"

"Eeh, no thanks." The monkey said.

"Really?" Eggman asked, annoyed. "My awful laugh usually convinces people."

The monkey slammed the door in Eggman's face.

"Oh, ho!" Eggman growled. "I see! You want to negotiate! A little back and forth! Give and take, eh? Okay, I'll go first!" He turned to his robots. "Minions: ATTACK!"

At the order, Eggman's robots surrounded Monkey Boy's house.

"Eggman?" Sonic asked in surprise. "I never thought I'd say this, but boy am I glad to see you!" He zoomed off, dropping the box of laundry.

"Aww, I just fluffed those!" Knuckles complained.

One by one, Knuckles, Sticks, Amy, and Sonic smashed the robots, while Penny stayed away from the fights. She watched as Knuckles smashed a robot. "Now that's for the laundry!" He snapped.

After Sticks landed in the pile of laundry after defeating the robots, the monkey snarled in annoyance. "Hey! You left my clothes on the ground!" He complained. "Whatever happened to personal responsibility? Ugh!"

Penny's mouth dropped open. Didn't he just notice that Sticks and the others literally just saved his life?!

"You're coming with me, monkey boy!" Eggman growled.

"That's Mr. Monkey Boy to you!" Monkey Boy snapped. "And anyone else, actually." He gulped when he saw Eggman's robots roll closer to him, but thankfully Sticks flew in and pushed the monkey out of the way.

"Are you okay?" Sticks asked.

"Ah, just peachy!" The monkey said. "I love having my home destroyed by a madman! What are you, nuts?!"

"Look, if you're not happy with our help, I'm sure there plenty of other curse removing marmosets who would love to have us around!" Sonic said, walking over.

"I'm the only one!" Mr. Monkey Boy said. "But I get your point. Look, I'll do anything you want if you just get rid of him!"

That was all he needed to say. Penny stayed behind with the monkey, pushing him away from any robots that nearly collided with them.

"As my great aunt used to say, no retreat, no surrender!" Eggman vowed.

However, he changed his mind instantly when his robots exploded right in front of him. "RETREAT!" He yelled, running off.

"Catch you later, Eggface!" Sonic smirked.

"Look at the mess you made!" Monkey Boy growled in annoyance, pointing to the broken robots around him.

Sonic groaned in annoyance. "What happened to, "I'll do anything?!" He snapped, about to strangle the monkey, but luckily Penny, Tails, and Amy held him back.

"Well, you ruined my laundry, but you did save my life! Now I will break the Curse of the Cross Eyed Moose."

"YES!" Sticks cheered, walking up to the monkey.

"Now, raise your right hand..." The monkey smiled. He realized something. "Oh, wait, that's weddings. Um. Just stand there and try not to look too stupid. Uh, blabbidy blah blah blah dongity do wabba wabba bam! Hey! The curse is gone, there you go!"

Penny just stared at him.

"That's it?!" Sticks gasped in excitement. "It's all over?"

"What, were you expecting a parade? The curse is broken! Go on! Get lost!"

.....................................

"I'm free!" Sticks said happily as they walked home. "Free of the curse! Free to live life freely! In freedom!"

"And we're free of your superstitious nonsense." Tails said.

"Yes." Penny said with a nod, until Sticks let out a scream. "No!" She screamed. "A moth colleen seven legged spider!"

"Ah, crud...." Sonic groaned in annoyance.

"It's eleven years bad luck! We must go to Lake Yenny Haha, and...."

"Boom!" Knuckles said as he flicked the spider away. "Curse broken!"

Everyone laughed.