8 Days

A lot happened since that day. Well, I can say a lot cause I've been having that depressing mood for much a longer time again. But I'm glad Adrian is always there for me. I mean, in the virtual world, or with the connection of some strand of waves from our phones.

I told him about that day with Kam. He said he's glad that I'm going out and well hanging out with someone, again. Uhm, I wonder if he really means that but I guess I just have to trust him that his words are sincere.

Adrian has been going out with some women for quiet some time since I don't remember when. But he still have so much time to reply to me and give time to me whenever I need someone to talk to. I remember that time he's out with some woman but he's still replying to me. Haha. Sorry, I did not mean to be a bother when he's out dating.

Uhm, Kam had been constantly messaging me, mostly past 12 midnight but sometimes when I'm not doing much at work or if I'm on break. He insisted on asking me out again. So there's this time that Jeilin and I (one of my co-employee at work) went to eat out cause I'm getting so stressed at work with those claims that I had errors, and their on a row, to make it worse. Okay, so we were at Rack that time and he was texting me he's near the area and had been there like 15 minutes before I told him we are at the mall. He came at the Rack and Jeilin keep looking at me weirdly.

Kam is not my boyfriend, right? He still looks at me with that adoring 'look'. But anyway, to that day, we walk Jeilin home.

If Jeilin isn't there, he might have held my hands, he's always so close to me, like some lion or some tiger protecting its mate.

We did not accompanied Jeilin to their condominium unit but she said it's near and advised we go home cause there are not much vehicle now. It's past 10 p.m. that time so we booked a Grab.

Then there was this night he asked if we can go out again. I said I'm lazy to go out so he suggested we can hang out here at my place. Haha. My room seems like it does not want visitors so I declined. He tried again, I mean if we can go out. I was really curious why he wants to go out with me. Though I can sense something, I don't want to assume.

'I like you'

That had been his response.

Uhm, okay, I am grateful of his admission. But I don't trust it as much as I don't trust anyone anymore, I mean, to the level like I still doubt people's intensions.

I enjoyed the time Kam had been taking some time to chat or message me despite his busy schedule. As much as I am thankful for Adrian's, too.

Seven nights after the time Kam and I met again after some years from high school, I did not expect that something so sudden will happen in my life, an event I did not see coming.

I'm out at the Cinema, watching again, cause I'm so bored at my room. I forgot to take a jacket or a sweater with me. The Cinema is like winter room, haha. But anyway, I replied to Kam that I am there. It's getting late, the movie ends near 10 p.m. I guess. Time the mall closes.

He said he'll come but then he needs to stop by at the hospital to take the result of his medical check-up.

'Uhm, but can I stay at your place cause it's really late if I go home after I come to get you there' - Kam

Is it alright if I can allow him? Hesitating. He's still a guy, you know. And Adrian knows about this. He said I must be careful and said I should not agree. The text sounded a bit annoyed and worried.

'Okay, I'll let you stay'

OMG! Did I just send that? Now, Adrian texted me that I must call him or text him if Kam might do something weird to me. I agreed but I guess Kam won't do anything.

'Alright. I'll message you later.'

'The movie's still running, it's alright, I'll message you, too.'

So after almost 2 hours at the Cinema, I sent Kam a message to see me at the café. And after almost half an hour, he arrived, ordered an ice-blended drink and looks at me in that nervous aura, though he seems calm.

"So how's the movie?" he asked.

"It's amazing, I hope you were there a while back" I answered "But anyway, did you get your results?"

"No, I'll just get it tomorrow before I go home"

"Oh, okay" I said "Come on, it's getting late now" I look at the time on my phone and it's past 11 p.m.

We got in a taxi and arrived at my place. I'm renting a room and have it to myself.

"You're room's okay" he commented "It isn't messy that much as you described it last" he continued.

I kind of fleered at him but I dismissed it at once.

I went to get the an extra foam but we ended up sleeping together at it. Seems a bit strange to have someone sleeping beside me. I had some sleep over with some guy friends of mine from college but not like this, I mean.

Add up that it's difficult for me to sleep easily. I can feel him looking at me then looking at the ceiling. So after some hours of agony, I was able to catch that sleep.

************************************

I woke up, and was yawning still. Still sleepy but I kept my eyes open. I notice him looking at me. Oh okay, he is awake.

"Good morning, beautiful" he greeted.

"Oh my! I am not, with this mummy look on my face, and more to zombie look" I said and gave a faint laugh "Anyway, good morning, too"

************************************

We went out to eat and on the park, he held my hand.

"I like you" he said "I know this is too sudden but would you be my girlfriend?"

"Do you?" I asked "Really?"

"Yes"

"What if it won't last? What if you will leave me, too? What if you will betray me also? What if you realize you don't really like me?"

"I won't be like them, the ones who did those to you" he said "I'm gonna be a good friend, not like them, and a good lover, if you allow me to"

I stared at nothing in particular.

"Can I be that person? Will you allow me to take care of you?" he asked.

I look at him.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" he asked again.

"Yes" I mindlessly answered.

Eight days since we met again and we became lovers. The first time I had a real boyfriend.

I did not see this coming. He is an unexpected turn of my life. I wonder if we would really last. And importantly, will I love him easily? Or will I ever really love someone romantically again?

He kissed me, the first I had.

"Let me stay with you, Rouge, I'll always be here for you, ever since that day" he said "I thought it was just a childish crush but here I am, with you."

I look at him. Then my eyes watered, the tears came. Mixed joy and sadness. I heard him, his words.

I'm not in love with Kam. I know that, maybe I like him now cause he likes me. Maybe this is wrong. Maybe it's a good thing to dive into. Nothing is sure in this world. Then, maybe, I'll take the risk with love.