Frozen child

"Hello Damian" Angela greeted Damian casually as she walked towards the glass. She placed her palm above the glass and studied Jhay's sleeping face.

"What did you do to her?" Damian hissed as he refrained himself from attacking Angela.

"Wrong question, son" Angela said and smiled at Damian as if everything was fine.

"What did she do to herself?" Angela stated. Damian didn't know where to start. He didn't know how he should react.

"This is what she wanted to do" Angela said with a dramatic face.

"Tell me everything you know and I'll keep it a secret against the police." Damian said as if he was exchanging an important business with Angela.

"Jhay was hurt badly. She could not forget about everything you did to her. Believe me, she did it for her own sake. She only asked me for help." Angela said, eyes filled with sorrow and regret. Panting, Damian stared at Jhay's peaceful sleeping face.

"I had no idea that she was here for all those times. The night when you left to join the army, Jhay became invisible. She became untraceable, even John could no longer track her whereabouts. I kept searching for her and received a letter." Angela began and hugged herself. Damian stared at Angela as if he would not want Angela to stop speaking.

"We were not aloud to use computers or any communication devices during the outbreak. I had no idea how to reach her. One night, when we were still living at Pherein's house, there was a letter on my table." Angela said as she looked at Damian in the eyes.

"I don't know who send that letter, it was just there when I entered my room. I opened it and read what's written on it" Angela said.

"Was it Jhay who wrote the letter?" Damian asked curiously. Angela nodded affirmatively.

"Yes"

"Continue" Damian said and breathed heavily.

"Here" Angela picked up a folded paper from her wallet and handed it to Damian. Damian opened the old looking and crumpled paper and read it.

--->

Damian,

I know I should have stopped you from leaving. I was too afraid to ask for you to stay with us, with me. I have always been praying for your safety. But still, you chose to walk away. It was so painful that you left. I know I've hurt you for not noticing your efforts because of Haji. I've always wanted to say, I've always wished that you'd never leave me like what Haji did to me. I thought you would stay by my side. I treasure you so much.

Now that you're gone. I had no reason to fight anymore. I wanted to say that night that I would wait for your return. But I was afraid. I was never too good in waiting. I did love you more than a friend. But forgive me too, hearts could never lie. I still love Haji until now. Maybe a person cannot have two hearts, but still a heart could love two persons. But a heart needs to choose in order for it to not to be broken into two. This letter I wrote was meant for you. But I am afraid you would not be able to have a chance to read it. Ms. Angela will keep this letter for you.

And if ever you'll come back, you'll know where to find me.

I'm right here in the place where Haji used to be happy.

Love,

Jhay

<---

Damian's chest throbbed after he read the letter. Angela watched him as he tried to stand still with his trembling feet.

"There were two letters, the other one was for me." Angela said and handed the other paper to Damian.

"You might want to read it" Angela said as she tried to hold back her tears. Damian stared at the paper, hesitating whether he would read it or not.

--->

Ms. Angela,

Thank you. I know I've been a very demanding person ever since I was little. I've been a cold and numb person. I know a million thanks would not be enough for everything that you've done for me. But let me ask another favor, this time I may not pay you back. You are the only person who could help me. If mom wants to see me, tell her I'm okay. If John wants to find me, tell him I'll be fine. If Damian wants to see me again, tell him not to wake me when he sees me. But if you want to take care of me, I'm right at Haji's house. Sleeping peacefully.

Always waiting,

Jhay

<---

"When I arrived here, these were all I've seen. Everything was fully prepared and systematised. I studied everything inside this chamber. All these life supports, and automated systems were accurately prepared. These cycle could last for twenty to thirty years. I don't know how Jhay did it nor I don't have any idea how she studied it but..."

"She put herself in a long sleep? She froze herself from waking up? Is that what you're trying to say?" Damian gasped. Angela nodded sadly.

"One time, Jhay told me when she felt very lonely during the outbreak, she sounded so calm but lonely" Angela continued.

"I wished I could freeze myself and wait for Haji. That way I won't feel too lonely because all I need is to sleep. Then one day he'll wake me up and say that he came back for me."

"Even if I didn't come here she could still manage to live. The glass adopts the temperature outside and adjusts automatically according to the normal specification of the human body. If the oxygen runs out, another supply automatically replaces the old one. Same with the supplies of glucose. But I wanted to take care of Jhay. Even if she wanted to do things alone for herself, I still want to guard her. Because I am also her mother." Angela stated. Damian placed both his two hands onto the glass and looked at Jhay's sleeping face.

"Only Haji could wake her up. This glass is too strong and thick and if you're going to let the Army, no, the Government knows -Jhay would never like it." Angela warned Damian.

"But Haji won't be coming back. Then what should I do, Jhay?" Damian said hopelessly.

"Then maybe, you should wake her up after 20 years." Angela said with a little bit of sarcasm.

*

*

*

SIX months later...

"Where am I?"

"Am I alive?"

"It's cold"

"Dark"

"Noisy"

"Unbearable rustling sounds"

"Cries?"

"Jhay..."

"Jhay? Who's Jhay?"

It has been six months since Jhay froze her life inside that glass. She could barely hear sounds and only rustling noises. She could feel the warmth and coldness around her. She could sometimes hear voices that were calling her name, but she barely remembered her name. She would sometimes question herself whether she was afraid or not. She could no longer differentiate between happiness and sadness. She could not remember her own face when she was still living. She could not remember why she was in that state.

"Who am I?"

"Where do I came from?"

"Am I lonely?"

"Am I alone?"

"Am I living?"

Jhay's heartbeat monitor suddenly alarmed but before Angela could do anything to assist Jhay, the machines automatically adjusted on its own.

"Just how long have you prepared for this, Jhay?" Angela asked in awe as she stared at the system controls and monitors worked on its own.

"Is someone talking to me?"

"Am I Jhay?"

"Jhay, please wake up" Damian pleaded as he sat on a stool next to Jhay's body.

"Who was that?"

"Haji"

Without any sign, Jhay's tear escaped from her left eye. She knew she was crying, she could feel a pair of eyes staring at her.

"Hey Jhay, are you lonely?" Damian said helplessly. Angela brought a tray of meal for Damian and said she would watch Jhay over for the night.

"No, I'm fine" Damian stated as if his body didn't declared his tiredness. He was restless and lonely. He wanted to wake up Jhay but he was afraid. He thought that Jhay would wish to freeze herself forever than be in pain until eternity without seeing Haji again.

"You should rest, Damian. Jhay is just sleeping, she won't run away" Angela said and sat to where Damian was sitting earlier. Damian went out the door and grabbed his meal.

*

*

*

IT took several months to let Damian know Jhay's mother and family where she was. Pherein fainted the first time she saw Jhay. They weren't able to accept it easily and followed what Jhay wanted. John protected their privacy and never let the public know. The underground on Haji's former house were constructed properly but the ground above still looked the same. Everyone would thought that the place was only a vacant lot with healthy grasses. They would do weekly shiftings to look after Jhay. It was clearly stated that Jhay didn't needed them to look after her. But what were family and friends for?

Pherein usually sings lullaby for Jhay whatever time of the day. She would tell her stories and talked to her as if Jhay was awake. She would sometimes cry but not too much, that would make her daughter worry. Angela most of the time would draw sceneries and beautiful images on a sketch book. She usually never talks around Jhay. All she ever do was paint and monitor Jhay's condition. Damian most of the time would tell a lot of jokes in front of Jhay. He would sometimes let Jhay hear John's voice from the North Pole through voicemail. Damian never saw Jhay smiled nor moved a muscle since he first came to that place. All he ever saw was tears.

"Jhay, if I ever see you cry again, I swear I'm going to wake you up" Damian said with a lonely face. He sighed and touched the glass as he placed his left cheek on the cold surface.

"Aren't you cold?" Damian asked as he felt the coldness of the glass penetrated through his cheek.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I know what I did was unreasonable and selfish. But I came back, for you. Will you wake up now? Will you come back, for me?" Damian said hopelessly. He knew he could never win against Haji. He knew Haji was the only one who could make Jhay smile and laugh effortlessly. He knew he was insecure and jealous. But he still wanted to try. He still wanted to win Jhay's heart. But he made a decision that made Jhay lost her hopes all at once. And Damian knew that was the biggest mistake he had ever made. From the time that he was fighting against all those SIS, all he could ever think was Jhay. He wanted to become stronger for Jhay. He wanted to prove himself that he was reliable for Jhay. But he never realized, he was the only reason why Jhay still wanted to fight. Jhay wanted to watch after Damian for Haji. Jhay wanted to tell Haji that his best friend was all right. Jhay wanted to protect Damian.

*Beep! System detected an abnormal circulation of the blood.*

The system spoke and Damian immediately looked at the screen. Jhay's heartbeat monitor beeped repeatedly. Damian immediately pressed the automatic command and waited for Jhay to calm down.

"Jhay, how much longer will you wait for him?" Damian said without taking his eyes off towards the sleeping lady.

"He won't be coming back. Why can't you just forget him?"

"I'm telling you this. I can still wait a little longer. But, time will come... I will be selfish. I don't know how my considerate side will last. Even if you'll hate me for the rest of my life, I'll wake you up." Damian said.

*

*

*

EVERYTHING went slowly back to normal. New homes were built, corpses were buried. Families were reunited and new friendships bloomed. The world began to smile once again and the children began to wonder.

"I wonder what kind of world would you see the time you wake up, Jhay" Damian thought.