24 The grand wizard

The first night back in hogwarts was spent watching animated films with Mordred in the personal dimension. Zeus has been stacking the GODFLIX as he calls it with all the hits. So i reluctantly put on frozen and Tangled, I was fully happy to watch how to train your dragon and Brave.

Mordred's first three questions after the movies were:

1: can I get a night fury?

2: what can we do to protect ourselves from the Mouse, he has Jedi on his side. That's an army of sabers!

3: do you think that Gobber exists in this world and he and Dumbledore had a fling?

I smacked her upside the head for that last question. FYI the dragons from the movies don't exist in Potter verse, only those shitty wyverns. As for how I'm dealing with the mouse? Well zeus gave me a piece of good news.

Disney has struggled to get into anime for a long time, it's partially because every time they make Asian cultured films some parties found them offensive.

Big Hero 6 was one of my favourite movies but they were very blatant about how SanfranSokyo was basically the complete takeover off Asian culture.

There's also were controversies about mulan and Pocahontas that I could recall. Lastly there was the film about some Asian girl and a dragon which I failed to see but I heard it flopped hard. Long story short as long as we stick to anime universes we're safe..... for now.

After returning to our school dorms I overheard that the twins were planning to prank the headmaster at breakfast to show their sister their mettle. When asked for suggestions I decided to start off with something really offensive. Wizards are ignorant about the last two centuries, only having an extremely general idea of what's going on.

So when we walked down to the Gryffindor table I couldn't wait to see who got the joke, or who was going to murder dumbledore and the twins afterward. Seamus was hobbling due to his fractured shin gifted to him by Mordred and Neville was checking his new front teeth in a hand mirror.

When I sat down I heard some girls giggling so turned to see Mordred walking in followed by Anna and Merida. The fact that all the first year girls were following her like ducklings was hilarious to me.

When the liger plopped down beside me she gestured to the girls to introduce themselves. The first year girls eyes were flickering between me, Harry and Mordred. The other boys in my group barr Neville were jealous about the stares.

I listened to the girls rattle off their introductions and noticed Ginny was rather lackadaisical. Onset of bewitchment symptoms it seems, after classes today I'm going to start studying the dark arts, going to the ROR and the restricted section seem to be the best bets, I can navigate around plot to start my search in the ROR.

Maybe I'll be invited to Grimmauld Palace at one point so I can learn the black family archives. Looking at the Disney girls we made some small talk about their homes, an interesting fact is that Merida's clan rely on weapons to cast charms and curses sometimes. That's why she focused on the bow, an arrow can travel much faster than a spell cast by a first year who only got their wand.

Anna was happy to talk about magical creatures and her own studies into golemancy. I immediately thought about Olaf and how he may be a family project or something. Anna also joked about how they didn't allow Caribou as class pets.

I joked about how the elves would take them and use them to prepare lunch which made her pale quickly. Merida led the conversation to exotic meats, id basically eaten everything she listed outside of magical ingredients.

She was shocked when i said I'd eaten Komodo dragon before, it was at a festival in my first life. A guy was selling exotic meats for burgers and stuff so I sampled a lot.

The conversation ended when the squeaky door off the staff entrance opened. The teachers flooded in to take their seats. Dumbledore always attends the first breakfast of the year so he can see whether the first years are well rested, if they are then that's fine but if they aren't then he would get to enjoy seeing them run ragged at tonight's dinner.

As he sat down to eat I was patiently waiting for the *blop*. It begins...

An elf had just apparated infront of Dumbledore drawing the entire rooms attention. Most students have never seen a house elf before, it's about three feet tall and wearing a potato sack.

"Is youse Dumbydore of the clan? The Grand Wizard?" Asked the house elf.

Dumbledore has been called many titles over the years so being called a grand wizard was nothing new to him. So he accepted the title immediately and chose to address the elf.

"I am, and who might you be?" He relies on his usual grand fatherly tone.

"I bees Wanky, Master sent you the sacred Hood to wear for you. Tis a great honour sir."

Dumbledore was used to being sent gifts for his past accolades so he just accepted the gift. A hood wasn't anything special but if wearing it is all it takes to appease a political party then so be it.

Wanky the elf cast a clothing charm at Dumbledore which changed his clothing greatly. His dark red robes changed to white ones and his face became covered with white cloth only displaying his twinkling eyes.

Wanky then handed him a rope tied into a noose before relaying to Dumbledore the actions he's meant to take. They were strange but most wizard customs are. Dumbledore could barely see out of the hood which obscured his glasses so he just did what was easiest.

Like Wanky had told him, he stood up and thrust the noose in the air. "I Albus Dumbledore have been Delcared the Grand Wizard of the clan! I will bring Purity and Prosperity to my people!"

His clouded vision did not allow him to see the horrified expressions marring the muggle children and the fearful ones spreading across the ethnic children.

Professor Snape who had just entered and saw the declaration was flabbergasted as he was actually aware of what the lord of light just declared. He was then staggered by the clapping and encouragement from the pure blood students with the majority being from his House!!!

Blaise Zabini gripped the knife he was using to cut his breakfast tightly when he heard Draco Malefoy say "Finally that crack pot came around! Let's purge them all!"

At the Gryffindor table Ron decided it would be smart to clap along to the headmasters words. Angelina Johnson, Dean Thomas and Lee Jordan were looking at him murderously.

Angelina turned to George and asked "do you agree with that?" Obviously referring to Ron, he's now classified as an IT to people. George was going to reply until he looked to Jon who was struggling to hold his laughter.

When they heard Jon's idea they didn't think it would be funny, Jon told them that the faces of several people in the room would pale drastically and people would be pissed at Dumbledore. They wanted to go big! He neglected to tell them the context behind the joke!

So George replied "I don't know? Do you?" Which caused the girl to gawk at him. Did he really just ask her that!

She slapped him then stormed out of the great hall accompanied by several other students who needed to report this to their parents. Mordred dragged Jon out before he died of laughter suppression.

Dumbledore had removed the hood and regained his vision. The elf identified as Wanky had vanished, some students were leaving for class and the rest were looking at him with an awed expression. He'd never gotten those looks from Slytherin students in the past so he was confused. When he looked at Severus who looked greatly disturbed he realised he may have done something wrong.

Later that day he was called into the ministry to address several claims. He did not have a fun afternoon once he realised what he just did. His close friend Kingsley Shacklebolt was glaring at him as if he was a death eater the entire meeting.