10 !ANGST! richtofen x nikolai(takeo)
(imma just- not talk about the staniels one rn FHHF- anyways, this isn't gonna be smut. its angst! basically the zombies' gang, richtofen, takeo, Nikolai, and the nasty American Dempsey- basically Nikki poisons them all to try and break the cycle. i hope you enjoy this fuckin trainwreck-)
!WARNING!: this contains murder(?) and suicide- and overall just sad ass grown men- if ya don't like, don't read-
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was dark out, the final round for the day just ended, Dempsey plopped himself down with a huff as Nikolai went to start a fire. eventually, richtofen and takeo joined them as the fire started. no one said anything- no one needed to. this night was just like any other night, they've done it all a thousand times- maybe more, they were all too tired to speak at this point.
except for takeo, he wanted to tell richtofen how much he loved him, he's always wanted to- and tonight was the night. he cleared his throat to say something, then suddenly Nikki did the same, louder "oh i have surprise! who want drink!" takeo frowned as the two others turned towards Nikolai, he held a single vodka bottle "it is full! we all take one drink, and we save it for many nights!"
the gang actually looked happy for a minute, they all eagerly took their turns drinking from the bottle. finding alcohol was rare here- but takeo shook his head, not wanting any. Takeo went to hand it back to Nikolai, the Russian was no longer smiling "Nikolai, upset you can't have it all to yourself?" he chuckled as Nikolai shot him a disappointed look, then smiled when Dempsey and richtofen looked at him "da, maybe- but we should sleep now. it is best-"
Dempsey nodded and laid back, yawning already "sure thing Russki. sure thing." he closed his eyes, takeo reached to grab richtofens arm but Edward was already scooting to lay against Nikolai, snuggling against his side. takeo sighed, just going to lay back by himself. he can just tell richtofen tomorrow, he always had another chance.
he always had another chance.
____________________
takeo opened his eyes, he wasnt quite sure what time it was but the sky was still dark, he turned to look at whatever noise woke him up, it was Nikolai. he was crying- richtofen and Dempsey were both laying still on the ground, maybe a little too still, Nikolai was laying by them, just- crying. takeo huffed "if you could cry over your fourth wife a bit softer it would be nice, some of us want to sleep-"
Nikolai just groaned in response, trying to quiet his sobbing, he was too tired to do anything else. the poison kicked in much slower for someone his size, so all he could do is lay beside his two dead friends, with someone who would gladly kill him for little to no reason. Takeo grumbled and rolled over to face away from them, muttering curses before trying to sleep again.
it wasnt long before Nikolai went quiet.
--------------------------------------------------------------
The next time takeo opened his eyes he brought his arm up to block the sunlight, it was morning now. He rubbed his eyes and sat up, looking over at the others before going to stand "good morning-" he stretched, yawning as he popped a few places in his back. he frowned and looked down at the others, they were still in the same exact positions as before.
"i said good morning..?" he nudged Dempsey with his boot, when he didn't get a reaction he gently kicked his side- no response. "Dempsey? doctor??" he knelt by richtofen and cupped richtofens face in his hands, he went pale once he realized it was cold. He immediately went to shake Nikolai awake, but before he even could touch him he jumped back, covering his mouth to prevent himself from gagging.
Nikolai had blood splattered across his mouth and down his chin, flies already started to gather around the drying liquid. what bugged takeo the most though, were the eyes, they were staring up at the sky, permanently open. he took a step back, looking over them all "what did you do- fat Russian what did you do!" he shouted, it was half muffled since he forgot to move his hand.
he spent a good moment just standing there, watching them, praying one of them would just get up. then he let his hands drop to his side, his gaze wandering to his katana, he looked down at himself then sat near richtofen. After a quick mental battle with himself, he pulled richtofens limp body up against him, pressing the body against his chest. "doctor..-" he started, but looked down at richtofens face, it was calm and- happy. at least that's how takeo saw it.
"doctor i love you. so much, so- so much. i have for so long- i wish i could have said it sooner. i- i was a coward, i did not want to ruin what you had with nikolai- but-" he paused, propping richtofens head back up once it started slipping. "but now he's gone. he's not stopping me from telling you how i feel- i wanted to start something with you, Eddie. i wanted to leave this place, settle down, and get a place for us- i-" he sniffled. "i wanted to make you happy-"
he held richtofens face in his hands again, gently rubbing the corpse's cheek "forgive me. i have failed you- i failed us. maybe in another life, hai?" he stared at richtofen, taking in every detail he would never get to see again. then without hesitation this time, he leaned in to kiss him, shuddering against the feeling of cold lips against his own, but he held himself against the kiss until he couldn't stand it anymore, pulling richtofen back against his chest and hugging him. then he just sat there.
For a moment he wanted to sit and stay there forever, just holding richtofen, staying with who he loved. then he found his gaze back at his katana, laying lonely on the ground. Takeo sighed, kissing richtofens forehead "forgive me. please forgive me-" he gently set richtofen down, pausing to look at him one more time.
"i love you, and i always will, doctor."
He made his way to the katana, slowly picking it up and unsheathing the blade, he forced a chuckle "i always knew, you would be my end, old friend-" he ran his fingers across the cool blade, gripping the handle as he sat, tucking his knees under him.
"Gomen' nasai." he whispered to himself, throwing one more tired glance at richtofen before bowing his head, driving the blade through his stomach. he grunted and put one hand on the ground to steady himself, before gripping the handle again and twisting the blade side to side, properly gutting himself. He kept his eyes squeezed shut, the feeling of warm blood soaking his uniform overpowered by the searing agony of the blade lodged in his stomach, but he held it there. whimpering as tears slipped down his face.
He just started sobbing, hunched over in pain he let the tears fall, mixing with the blood staining the ground. He began mumbling frantic apologies in Japanese, he didn't even know who he was apologizing to anymore, it just helped ease his pain to apologize.
his sobs and pleads slurred together as he ended up slumping forward, driving the katana deeper through him. He just whined, gasping repeatedly as breathing became harder, he knew he was about to die. He stopped gasping, a smile twisting itself onto his face "..life is light, when compared to honor-" he sighed, releasing his final breath before completely going limp against the ground, dying with the smile imprinted on his face.
----------------------------------------
(uh- *sobs* MFNKDHFB GODAMNIT- okok 1310 fuckin words-)
