125 Waiting (II)

As they rode home in the taxi cab, Li Hua and Chang remained silent all the way to their house. Staring out the window, Chang traced her finger on the small droplets of moisture outside that captured bright bits of light from the surroundings. Tracing from her memory she drew his smile on the window, smiling a little herself at the memory until they came to a stop.

Once they had arrived, Chang offered the man who drove them a little extra to help her with her mother as they hadn't been able to take her wheelchair with her. At the airport they had used one that the airport itself provided to make it to the cab. Smiling though the man declined and gently helped her mother up the steps and into their house.

'I'll have to get Mom something else soon.' Grateful for the help, Chang payed the man before entering the cold house, carrying only the picture and a small wad of cash.

"Brr, it's so cold in here! Even for November!" Lihua complained from the sofa. "Xiao Xie will you turn the furnace on and up?"

Chang nodded wordlessly, first draping a blanket over her mother that had been lying on the back of the sofa.

"Ah thank you sweetie." Li Hua smiled sweetly at her daughter, her heart breaking to see the latter's drawn and pained face. "I'm sure it will be OK?"

"Will it though? I wrote him a coded letter like I used to do with Dad, this little written word games in our notes. The more I think about it though, Jian probably wouldn't understand. I don't remember if I even told him about that. I don't even remember what I wrote, I was so stressed but I think I said something like I don't love you and some other horrible things.."

Big fat tears started to fall over and over. "Mom I don't think I ever told him I love you, and I do. I love him very much. I'm still worried about him leaving, what if he never even reads it at all? What if he died already, and I'll just never know?!"

"Come here, hey, calm down. You're working yourself up." Chang sat down by her mother, who tried to brush away her tears. "First off all, I highly doubt that he died, that boy is far too tenacious to be taken down so easily.

"Secondly I think he knows, but you should tell him that in person WHEN you see him. And you will, after everything he's done and been through, I highly doubt he would just let you walk away, even if he doesn't understand your letter.

"In that case he's probably going to be pretty angry and hurt, and you'll have to be prepared for that when you see him. You will see him again so stop worrying, you just need to be patient and wait right now."

"Just how long will I have to wait?"

"I can't tell you that sweetie, you'll just have to be strong."

Chang sniffed while holding her mom, "I'll try mom."

----

Two weeks quickly passed by her even though every day seemed to drag. Every time the doorbell rang or the phone went off she would fly to it, waiting for Jian.

Still there was no word.

Thanksgiving was a rather dreary affair in their household that year, unlike previous years, excluding the one right after her dad passed. Every holiday that year had been painful. Her mother tried to encourage her to think positively and she tried. She really tried but it became harder each day.

Chang became really good at smiling even when she felt like falling apart and crying. Her mother's strength of kindness inspired her to work harder, to be better support for her mother.

'He' s not coming anymore, I just need to accept that and move on. For now I need to make the most of this time with mom.. '

The predicted date was quickly advancing on them whether they wished it or not. Chang could only watch as her mother slowly lost almost all of her functions and come to need assistance with everything.

LiHua' s speech was one of the last things that started to be affected. Spurred on by this Lihua began to open up to her more, as if wanting to pass all her memories and knowledge on before she lost the ability to.