I turned around and saw Santi. My eyes squinted as he pointed out a car that was parked outside. I smiled widely. I know whose car that is. In my heart, I know that’s him.
I put down the mic I was holding and exited the stage.
“Trinity, just wait for a moment,” I said as I pointed out that oh-so-familiar car outside. Trinity nodded and smirked.
“Go! But be quick okay?” she sheepishly smiled.
“I know!” I shouted through the loud music and ran outside the gym. I went to the said car and knocked on its window.. It rolled down.
“You came!” I smiled widely at Job. He didn’t smile back but I couldn’t care less. I was so happy that he came. I am overwhelmed with his presence. My heart was beating too fast I’m afraid it will burst.
I gave way for him to get out of his car. “I am not busy today.”
Five words. He just said five words but it felt like he just sang me a song. It was so pleasant to hear…
I took his hand and excitedly pulled him inside the gymnasium. I heard his light chuckle. It was so soft, but I heard it loud and clear despite the loud booming of the speakers.
We decided to stand behind the crowd. The gym was full of youth enjoying the music and praise for God. I let go of his hand but he didn’t let go of my thumb.
He’s just holding my finger, but it felt like he’s holding my whole life. My world. My soul.
I looked at him. The lights were already dimmed, but I could still see his face. His soft yet strict features. So innocent yet so dangerous. His face that captured every woman he encounters.
"Enjoy this night, Job. You will never regret this."
He looked back at me and gave me a small smile. He took again my hand and held it tight. My heart went wild like a bull wanting to get out of its cage.
Later on, the crowd cheered. The band including Trinity and Santi entered the stage.
"Thank you so much everyone for attending our gathering tonight. You just proved to the people that us, youth, is not just a youth of the community, but also the youth of our God."
The crowd’s cheer got louder. Job held my hand tighter. I held his with the same intensity. And I also hope we are holding each other’s hands with the same feeling.
The band reached the final song. Santi raised his hand and closed his eyes. All the youth inside the gym did the same.
I raised my hand as I tried to feel God’s presence. Job didn’t do the same, but his eyes were glued to the stage.
“Do you feel ashamed when praising our Lord?”
“No!” we shouted and clapped louder.
"Then let's praise for Him. I want you to feel this song, to sing this song in His Name, and to feel His love for us."
I felt my tears rolling down my face. My heart was so full of His love. Our God’s love is really great. Despite the hardships I experienced, He is still here. I could feel His overflowing love.
And now, although I don’t know what I’m going to do with these feelings, I know that God will guide me.
Thy will be done…
The keyboard started to envelope us with its music. All of us went quiet that every note from the keyboard was so clear. With that beautiful sound, I know that our hearts were also singing for our God.
Standing here in your presence
In a grace so relentless
I am won by perfect love
We joined the vocalist in singing our praises. Doing this for our Lord has a different feeling of satisfaction. It’s like He is also singing with us, and receiving all our love for Him.
I'm wide awake, drawing close, stirred by grace
And all my heart is yours
I opened my eyes when Job released his hold to my hand. And I was in awe when I saw that he is already raising his left hand. His right hand wrapped around my waist. He slowly closed his eyes and started joining the youth in singing.
I felt our hearts beating with life as the music filled up the room.
When I'm lost you pursue me
Lift my head to see your glory
Lord of all, so beautiful
I smiled genuinely.
Job Emmanuel... you are now starting to believe again. Sinking deep.
I hugged him, ignoring my reservations. His body tensed, but in the end, he hugged me back. His hug was so warm, it instantly reached my heart and enveloped all my senses.
His mouth was close to my ear. I felt his lips moving with the song.
"Your love so deep is washing over me. Your face is all I seek, you are my everything ..."
I know that it’s just a song. But I couldn’t help to feel something different. His hug got tighter.
"You are my everything..." he repeated.
I closed my eyes. This time, I am sure.
Lord, let Thy will be done.
I'm falling for this man. Sinking deep.