Aniki1
Pretty good so far, the writing quality is good. The fast-pace doesn't feel rushed, rather it's effective. It's a little bit rough, but like author said, he just upload it and plans on editing it afterward. The only thing that'd bug me so far would be the world background, but I guess since it's only the beginning, all of that will be further developed in the future. The story's quite intriguing, too. The story has potential--I mean, i'm no expert, that's for sure, but from what I see, it has potential to grow well if author keeps it up. Good job.
Leaving a review to the fun, fast-paced novel. You can say this is more of a 'light novel,' just from thoughts, the author colours his world. Just from the character talking to himself, revealing his feelings. I don't play too much with the system but every system I read is great and makes me go, "I wish i have a system to fawn my crush," and this novel had it. Keep on writing, story have to be told and ends.