6 Chapter 6: Thoughts At Dusk

Under the dimming sky underneath the Willow Talvir started to shift. With sluggish moves he turned towards the leaving sun in search of its warmth, a cool breeze making him coil. Due to his change in position he slowly started to slide down the natural slope of the Willow accelerating in the process.

*Bam*

Being awakened by impacting the cold ground, Talvir stood up and frantically looked around checking for any kind of danger. Finding nothing out of the ordinary around him, specially nothing harmful towards him, he finally calmed himself and sat once again with his back against the Willow.

He directed his gaze towards the departing sun, its orangey crimson light painting the skies a vast array of purples and blues. The contrast with the black inky seas engraving itself into Talvir's memory as one of the most beautiful sceneries he had ever seen.

'Weird to think that something so mesmerizing is hiding, weird and dangerous creatures.'

'I feel like I am forgetting something, what is it?'

Standing up and looking around once more, nothing, no one in sight, only the swaying grass moved by a cold breeze which happened every once in awhile.

Freezing in his spot he realized.

'Where did the armies go?!'

He ran towards the area where he had fought with the Opti. There had to be something there, proof of his first combat, proof of his first kill. Arriving at the spot, there laid a stick the result of the corpse's rapid drying, indistinguishable from any other stick Talvir had ever seen.

Picking up the desiccated remains of his first opponent Talvir reflected upon the information he had on his situation as he inspected it for any trace of the being that had fought him was contained within the stick.

'First of all, the soldiers are not human. They look human, act human, bleed like a human and if "killed" by another soldier "die" like a human. They lay there like maimed corpses, yet they are not dead which is definitely weird. They don't seem aware of it and even chant, march and yell as if unaware that they are not human. For the gods' sake the even have ranks in their kill announcement.'

'Aestival Opti Radix and Aestival Soldier Radix, both dormant beasts, have the same prefix and suffix almost as if the central statement is in reality nothing but a title, and I am sure that I killed Soldiers from both sides yet the announcement was the same. The Spell did not distinguish them while the Opti was unique, why?'

'Looking back, the Opti had more ornaments and decorations in both their sword and armor, nothing special that would have given increased combat advantage but rather may have represented status, which would make sense with what I think about the middle part of their name is. Now, is an Opti stronger or more skilled than a Soldier or is the change purely ornamental?'

Lifting his gaze from the stick, he observed his surroundings once more and made his way towards the place were he finished of the fallen soldiers. Swiftly arriving there, he once again picked up the sticks representing the remains of the soldiers. With 5 sticks in hand he gazed towards the horizon, the sounds of slaughter which he had performed earlier this same day echoing in his ears. The sickening crunching sound followed by squelching, wet noise of what he could only assume was the brain, cursed to forever be imprinted in his own brain as well as the knowledge that different skulls made different sounds. 

Involuntarily he gagged. Leaning forwards with his hands on his knees and tears in his eyes as he proceeded to empty the few contents on his stomach. After being done he still maintained the same position as he tried to reason with himself out loud.

"COME ON YOU BASTARD! You decapitated someone before opening their skulls, you clearly dealt with that. Do what you did again and detach yourself. Its the Nightmare Realm, nightmares are never pleasant, did you really delude yourself enough into believing that just because the weather is nice and the view is "mesmerizing" that you would have a good experience?"

"Its more dangerous than the slums in the Outskirts you dimwitted idiot! It really is kill or be killed here not some game. Self-pity is unnecessary, disgust nothing but a limiter and regret just poison. To kill is to survive and to survive is to live. You clearly handled the Opti's death very well, enough to want to go back to the battlefield. Do. It. Again."

Silence permeated the plateau after Talvir's outburst, the only sound being emitted being the pants of the 16 year old boy coming to terms with himself. Minutes passed, maybe hours he didn't know, but the passage of time was clear as the setting sun was gone and the full moon reigned the skies once again much like the previous night. 

Straightening himself, Talvir took a deep breath his gaze now focusing on the swaying leaves of the enormous weeping Willow which danced to the breeze's rhythm. Sighing he promptly made his way towards its sheltering embrace with the sticks he had collected in hand, the night was cold and the corpses he held in his hand would be useful for something, after all the dead don't feel.

'I think'

Walking back to the Willow he took his time, the night was cooling down but he still choose not to hurry. Thinking back to his earlier outburst, something sparked and a memory flashed inside of his troubled mind. Soft chuckles starting to escape his lips as tears softly rolled down the side of his face.

'It has been awhile since anyone has yelled at me.' He thought.

'I wasn't expecting it to be me doing it again after 2 years. Eh, to be fair is there anyone else left that would care enough to do so?'

'I miss you a lot sometimes mom.'

Looking up at the sky, while stopping for a moment, he gazed upon the firmament. The starry night triggering him to act, the stars reflecting on his tear streams as he softly said .

"You know mum, sometimes I wish that when you said that stars were the families of people smiling down at those they left down here, in order to comfort them of their departure, was true. You always managed to say the cruelest lies, you know?"

"And the best poems too."

He started to move again, slowly walking towards the willow. Silence being only interrupted by the soft rustling of leaves. Arriving at his destination he decided to lay while looking at the stars through the dense foliage of the tree. With too much in his mind, he decided to recite his favorite poem by his mother. The gift for his 14th birthday, the most prized thing he possessed was nothing more than this:

"In springtime's gentle bloom, the earth awakes,

Whispers of renewal, as nature undertakes.

Floral tapestries in hues of vibrant delight,

Awash with colors, painting day and night.

Summer arrives, a blaze of golden heat,

Fields ablaze, where the sun and shadows meet.

The song of cicadas, a warm symphony,

As life unfolds in radiant, vivid spree.

Autumn's breath, a whisper in the trees,

Leaves ablaze with a myriad of crimson keys.

A palette of warmth, a fleeting embrace,

Nature's masterpiece, a slow, graceful pace.

Then winter descends with its icy breath,

Blanketing the world in a hushed death.

Yet in the frosty silence, a quiet charm,

A pristine landscape, a tranquil balm.

Four seasons dance, a timeless rhyme,

A cycle of nature, an eternal chime.

Each a chapter, a story to be told,

In the book of time, a tale unfolds.

In my winter's hush, beneath the frosted moon,

My dear Talvir, like snowflakes, you bloom.

With eyes that gleam like icicles aglow,

Your existence a blessing protecting from me from winter's woe.

Through frost-kissed morns, I see your grace,

A gentle beacon in the cold's embrace.

In your laughter, I find the sun's warm light,

Keeping me safe through winter's coldest night."

Finishing his performance he felt something within him shift, as if mending itself. Talvir basked in the warmth of this feeling, maybe his mother's poems really had the power to make people feel better. She always claimed that with a smirk on her face. After around 15 minutes Talvir decided that it was enough and started to do what he had planned on doing while collecting the sticks; check if the sap of the willow was flammable. 

Something that many people didn't know is that the saps of certain trees are extremely flammable, take for example pine tree sap. One of the reasons forest fires were a big problem before the arrival of the Spell was because of their unpredictable nature, according to the Survival course instructor, there were recorded cases of forest fires in pine tree forests transferring and moving not only through the surface but also underground due to how flammable the sap inherently was.

Talvir wanted to check if this Willow's sap was flammable maybe to use as a makeshift weapon of sorts or just to set fire to a campfire in case it got cold at night during the following days. He hadn't figured out the objective of this Nightmare but he needed to prepare for the long run, who knows how long he would stay stranded there. Plus maybe fire would keep him distracted from his thoughts.

Much like earlier in the day, he used his sword as a hatchet hitting the previous spot as the wood was softer and with a couple swings the sap would probably flow again. When it got flowing he collected some with the Flagon afterall he had just lost a lot of liquids and the little food he still had in his stomach.

Drinking a good amount of the viscous sweet liquid once again, this time he actually focused on his body and to his surprise he could se the cuts he got from the Opti's sword disappear. He then proceeded to collect more for the experiment. Letting it sit inside the Flagon he started using the classic stick on stick friction method, but since there was no fluff or dried leaves it would take awhile.

One hour later Talvir was still trying, sweat running down his face, his arms sore from the repeated rapid movements, frankly at his limit as he had not fully recovered even after his nap. But he pressed on the need for knowledge more important to him than how tired he was.

As if answering to his will fire started, at first fragile and weak and then grew to a small flame after all the fuel was only a stick worth. Hurriedly Talvir used the tip on another stick, deeping it into the Flagon in order to cover it in sap. With the tip covered stick he approached it to the fire and the flame almost instantly climbed everywhere the sap was in the stick.

'Success. Now I have a reliable fuel and I can be extremely damaging by making some kind of flammable grenade with the Falgon. Imagine the damage it would do throwing it in the middle of the battlefield and the one spark from the impact of metal would just set it of burning many people.'

'Enough experiments for today, a nap can not replace night of sleep so I should use this moment with no wind and try to fall asleep.'

Laying down Talvir prepared himself mentally for tomorrow as he would probably be awaken by the sound of battle once more. After laying there for a while as he was about to fall into slumber he noticed something.

'Huh, some of the leaves are towning brown and yellow. Maybe autumn is approaching?'

And then darkness embraced him once more.

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 Hi there, first attempt at writing some sort of mental breakdown and strong emotions. I also wanted to include a bit of motivation and background for Talvir's character and his relationship with his parents. Mum this time Pops last time.

I think it makes sense for a 16 year old to react this way plus he is a bit more mature than many.

Thank you for reading my Dear Readers

Dr_Squalid