The forbidden room

Dinner wasn't spectacular. Only one peace of bread with cheese. But that should be enough for the day. I wasn't very hungry.

But I was hungry for music. And like every evening I went to my piano. It was new and had such a clear and beautiful sound! I loved it, and so, like all my instruments it was holy. For me they were holy. About them I cared most.

After playing a little I thought maybe I should search for new music papers.

I loved new things. They were like new adventures and I had to master them. It was a great feeling.

Like that I remembered an old room, where I may find something. It was always locked and my mom called it "the forbidden room". She showed it once to me as I was a child. I wondered, why was it forbidden? And then: Why did she show me?

So however, I went there and turned the key to open the door. And I saw - nothing. It was way to dark! First I had to grab a candle.

As the light shone into the room I was fascinated. So many books! I haven't seen so many in my whole life! They were everywhere, on the shelf (of course), on the table, even on the board and on the floor, covered with dust.

But even so - they looked pretty! Some were golden, some purple or dark blue, with golden or silvern letters.

But one captured my eye from the very beginning. I opened it and looked trough the pages. A diary - mom's diary! The dates were from around 10 years ago. It told about secret dates with dad and stuff like that. But I didn't understand.

"Why?", I asked. A second time. A third time.

I knew it was English but for me it seemed like Chinese. The question was: Why would they meet in secret, when they were already married and had a child? I mean, I'm 16. Six years older.

And then the big ending came on the last page: They married. Married? What should that mean?

I sat down on an armchair, next to a big brown clock. It was a beautiful clock, but I didn't realize.

I started reading again, trying to understand or at least to find something about a six-year-old child.

And so I sat there - reading mothers diary whiteout knowing anything about her. I thought I did, but didn't. And so like that I realized how far away I was from my own story.

I was deep in the story, I didn't even think anymore. I only read and read and read.

Suddenly the clock hid twelve - Midnight.

I was so pulled out of the story, I got a headache.

Then, out of the blue the pendulum jumped out of order and rose higher than normal. It rose till it pointed on a little hole in the wall. I was so shocked, I couldn't even move.

I stared on the wall, watching the pendulum and didn't know, what else to do. My face must have gotten pale. But then - the big silence. Not even a single noise. I heard my own racing breath.

After quite a while I took my courage and moved to the little hole. But as I touched the pendulum it fell back, making a loud noise. In my shocked as well as surprised state I took a few steps backwards. I then realized, nothing on this clock was real, everything was fake. I didn't even have the knowledge of clocks, but I knew, this wasn't normal.

I turned my attention back to the small hole. I touched it gently with my finger, and again something happened, something impossible: the wall right behind me moved away. Not loud, as everyone would imagine, but very silent and quiet. I drove together in shock again and turned around. But as I saw what happened, I couldn't hold back. I just had to go there and check it out.

Slowly I went to the wall and took the final step over the place, where a wall was standing once. And - nothing happened.

I wondered so I took the next step - and the next one. And... the next...

I went on, deeper in, unless I needed light, because I couldn't see anything anymore.

"I should have taken my candle with me.", I whispered. It was so very cold in here! I felt so lost, so lonely and a feeling came over me... I can't describe it, it's making me shiver and shake in fear and anxiety.

I turned around, in order to get the candle and come back. It was scary so all alone in an unknown room, sightly never used in a long time. It was cold, and still dark, even through the candle lighted it up a little. It shivered over my back.

I went along the corridor and looked to the paintings placed on the tall walls. I was sure: I've seen these pictures somewhere before. But I would even swear, I was never in here before. So where could I possibly have seen these pictures? They where painted so awesome, full of love and care.

The paintings got more familiar as deeper I walked in the corridor. Specially the last ones. And then I saw - I saw me. The person in this picture looked like she was my twin. But that wasn't possible, because the name sign read: Lilliana Elizabeth of Lippere. It was the last picture in the corridor.

The first name was correct, but the surname? No, haven't heard of it yet. Or maybe... a bell rung in my head, I had read that name in moms diary! Miss Hannahlya of Lippere had been moms best friend as far as I remembered. A coincidence? Maybe, but I was to exited to think more about it, I just headed to the little room that was coming after the corridor.

There were no paintings. The only furniture were a chair and a table.

As my gaze fell on the table I found a letter. It was sealed but as there was my name written on it in a beautiful calligraphy, I didn't hesitate to open it. Even trough it would have been for the other Lilliana on the painting.

Oh, the seal! It looked so familiar, so... so well known, as if I haven't seen another seal in my life. I tried to remember something that would fit in this scene, but sadly found nothing. I really tried hard to find something!

Maybe, maybe there was a connection to my lost memories. My memory stopped exact at the summer I have turned thirteen. Before that I didn't remember a thing. Maybe now was the time to reveal the truth.