31 Chapter Thirty One

Zhou Hua Fan, lost in her thoughts after being abandoned by the god stared blankly at her feet. Hua Fan swallows her bitterness recalling her memories of Huang Gou Heng. Without grandfather, I wouldn't have gotten this far in life. Without the Zhou name, I am a worthless rice bucket. Huang Gou Heng is... Like a movie playing fast-forward, she could only see the man who stood on her side in the shadows. He is...from a different world than my own. Her eyes flash and gaining control over her racing heart Hua Fan held her face in her hands cowering away from her memories. Never. I refuse to let it happen. Muttering incoherently to nobody. "I can't...Not again." She murmurs between her trembling fingers while trying to control her shaking.

Every time I see him I see nothing but that person. The Huang Gou Heng who gave her... Who foolishly gave me, a heartless monster his everything. A stupid fool! She was a walking disaster that took down anyone standing in her way. That Huang Gou Heng, I refuse to let you turn into him.  Resealing her heart while biting her tongue Hua Fan laughs bitterly to herself, "Not possible. It's not possible, stop joking with me." Her chest hurt but she refused to acknowledge the pain. Her eyes lose their vulnerability, her voice loses its trembling, and her back straightens. 

"Stop joking already!!!" She spat with one last glare at the space the being use to stand she quickly made her escape before she could take back her words. Before she changed her mind. A painful throb above her left chest causes Hua Fan to unconsciously cover the spot while the back of her eyes grows warm. Opening the door she rushes to leave the room less she becomes more conflicted with herself in her resolve.

"Mmph!" A small noise of pain and surprise escapes the girl since as soon as she rushes out she crashes into someone else. Unconsciously she closes her eyes and her hand went to her nose which took the brunt of the damage and loses her footing in the process. The person steadies her before she fell but her previous gloom had already been erased and only annoyance and anger burned in her heart for the person she had crashed into. After being assisted in standing straight again the doll angrily rose her glare towards the culprit with her delicate hands held up to her nose. "Who-?!"

Like she had been electrocuted Hua Fan jumps away from him with a pale expression and disbelief, choking on her next words. Huang...Gou Heng? His warm-colored eyes were a dark brown, gentle and tolerating sending a wave of warmth through her body. Hua Fan's resolve shook under the unexpected assault.  What are you doing here?  His lips were set into a tiny gentle frown of concern, his angled brows were furrowed with concern for her wellbeing. Her heart skips a beat much to her shame. "Are you alright?" With his hair combed back and styled Huang Gou Heng's handsome face was more obvious than before when he wore it over his eyes. After eating well and having a daily exercise regiment he was less of a twig compared to the last time she had seen him from the front. Instead of nervousness, his eyes held a sort of, calm gentleness. His face was also less gaunt and more defined...

She took a step back out of instinct regardless of the fact that the look in his eyes was far from dangerous and hostile. For her, it was all the more reason for her to get away from him. It was much too similar to the past so though there were no deep feelings in them she still feared seeing that emotion in his eyes again. Huang Gou Heng you... For a second she could not think straight and she stared at him with a pale and stiff stance as if she did not know whether to turn and run or ignore him. Huang Gou Heng as if he could see all her thoughts and emotions on her face as clear as day and felt as if something heavy was weighing on his heart. The girl in a blue-white qipao was so lovely, the sight of her again left him out of breath.

Her hair was bundled up above her neck revealing a smooth silky neckline that was hidden behind a fur shawl. Huang Gou Heng's eyes fall upon the chocolate eyes which had expressed shock and anger before slowly condensing into apathy after realizing who it was she had bumped into. Her obvious act of alienation towards himself made him feel as if a cotton ball was stuffed into his mouth making un unable to ask her the question he wanted to. So she truly does hate him. Opening her mouth Hua Fan knew she needed to do something, say something.

Gather your thoughts Zhou Hua Fan. Like she had been prodded by a stick in the back she flinches and fixed her expression into one of indifference. Her stiff posture turns into a relaxed one, crossing her arms Hua Fan haughtily looks at him like he was a pest. Speak Zhou Hua Fan. "Oh. It's you. What do you want?" She did not give him time to think about his answer, sending him a look of disdain and making to walk around him before he could react. "If there is nothing then I will leave first. Ye Ye is waiting for me." Although she appears calm on the surface, below the surface Hua Fan was afraid of making contact with him any longer than necessary.

Being in his presence made her heart race, it made her uneasy, and the decision she had made just a second ago was wavering already.  Zhou Hua Fan you aren't worthy of his love. Walk away. For the first time in a long time, Hua Fan felt her stomach flutter nervously as she brushes past him. His sleeve tickled her arm which she quietly but rigidly ignores.  Don't stop walking. Huang Gou Heng hesitates when he saw she was truly intending to leave and he quickly spoke up before she truly left him in the dust again. Turning to face her back, holding in his impulse to reach out and grasps the beautiful girl's wrist. "Zhou Hua Fan, you... What can I do for you to stop hating me?"