Aeipathy_02
After reading for a while, I observed that the author improved with his writings. It was difficult at first but you will get the hang of it in the future. With few edits and finishing touches, this will improve in terms of quality! I gotta say I'm inpressed with the author's growth! What a nice feeling of your brethren improving!
Overall was a solid story, I would mention that some words are repeated and the descriptions are a little weak. Also more adjectives could be used in the story to draw the reader into the story more. World background so far is a little incomplete but it could just be that way for the mystery. Looks good overall, keep up the good work :)
It is a really good story with interesting characters. While there are a few grammatical errors, the story itself managed to draw me in. Improving your grasp of the language comes with practice, but having a good story and concept aren't that easy. This story has the potential to become a great one. Keep up the good work.
A Science Romance that in its first 5 chapters already has 2,228 Views. What the author raises. Author: Aeipathy_02, in Seen Zone Z, in genre. Sci-fi Romance. The synopsis has this romantic premise: "I love you" doesn't always mean "I'll stay." The family routine changes from one moment to the next, even in the notions of the reality of the children, some say they robbed us, others it is a kidnapping. Being sold over and over again, they arrive in fields where they will work as farmers, with uninhabitable places to sleep. A harsh reality, mentionable as science fiction to digest the reading, if I encourage to cry or reproach fate.
Well....I was hooked when I read the synopsis. It was something new, mysterious and made me curious. Then, I started reading. The story development is too good. Lucas and Erin.....aww so sweetđđ Loved how they met, how they escaped, how they remained together and how they became engaged. I would love to know more about them. Now let's get into what puts me off about this book: language. Grammar is a mess. Hope u will proofread it soon. After all the book has just got started. The story has great potential. As soon as you fix the grammar, imo this book will be superâ¨đ
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First of all, this is a great first piece of writing material, great imagination and took me straight into the scene with some descriptive world building. Very diverse with characters mentality who share the same situation which is good, very realistic. Author just needs a little more work with sticking in past tense or present. Keep up the good work! I'll look forward to your improvement and the rest of the series!