32 Like a moth to a flame

"Here you are hiding." Idril lifted her head to see Feanor standing in the doorway of the library. The dim light threw his features into sharp relief, emphasizing the razor ship nose and the rugged panes of his face. She felt embarrassed and anxious at the same time when she looked at him, so she averted her gaze and pretended to look at her book instead.

Truthfully, she had been hiding here since morning. She hadn't been able to sleep peacefully last night. She kept on wondering whether she should arrange to fly home or take up Feanor on his invitation. Also, she couldn't shake the way Feanor had shut the door on her face last night, which made her wonder if the offer was even still on the table. With all the confusion, coupled with exhaustion and lack of sleep, she had felt totally overwhelmed and taken refuge in the library.

Feanor placed the mug of coffee on the small table in front of her. With her coloring, the exquisite line of her chin bent upon the book she was holding in her hands, her downcast eyes in his huge silent library made the whole scene look like an old oil painting. Looking at her lush lips, he just wanted to grab and kiss her insane.

However, he exercised control. He didn't want to frighten her off. So he gave her a moment to respond to his presence and stood watching her.

Idril was angry with him, maybe because he had made her look foolish last night, but she was badly in need of coffee, so without a word she picked up the mug and placed it on her lips. However, the first sip and she put the mug down with a yelp. She glared at him.

"That's scalding. Are you deliberately trying to harm me?"

Feanor tried hard to hold back his laughter. "Oh, sorry, was it too hot for you?" he moved closer, "Here, let me help you." he leaned towards her mouth and she leaned back, away from him, suspicion in her eyes.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing, I was just trying to assess the damage." Feanor was innocence itself, his index slowly prying her lips open, "Did you scald your tongue?". He gently blew on her slightly parted lips.

Idril wanted to shove him away, to her utter chagrin, her body betrayed her and her lips parted fully and her eyes clouded over with passion. He took advantage of it swiftly. His lips moved closed and he softly blew into her mouth, touching yet not quite touching.

Idril sat there paralyzed. Her mind stopping her from responding further, but she struggled to force her body to listen to her brain. She remained still, afraid to move, afraid to make a wrong move.

Feanor pretended not to notice her struggle. He unhurriedly finished blowing and moved back. He straightened up and held out the coffee to her again.

"It has cooled now."

She took the mug from him gingerly and took a sip. He smiled and turned to go. "When you decide to stop sulking, I will be in the backyard." With that, he left.

Idril chose to not snap back at him and finished her coffee in silence, all the while debating her next course of action. In the end she decided to give up and went in search for him.

He was at the backyard, leaning against the porch, sipping his tea. He was facing the sun, so Idril coming from behind saw his back. He was wearing a white t shirt and casual pants which sat snugly on his hips. As she watched him quietly, he stretched lightly which made the white t shirt stretch and emphasize his taut muscles. She was unable to help herself and ogled at him. Suddenly, Feanor turned to look her. Wordlessly, he held out his hand to her.

As a moth to a flame, she took it and moved closer. He pulled her closer, "Why are you trying so hard to run away from me?"

Self preservation, Idril thought. But she said, "We don't have any future.w hy prolong the inevitable. Our worlds are different."

He looked deeply in her eyes, "You are wrong. You haven't seen the future, we don't know what is going to happen." The sincerity was clear in his voice. "Don't write it off without giving it a try."

Idril stood there, her expression clouded with confusion. Feanor whispered in her ears, "Just a week, give me just a week. By the end of it, if you still want to leave, I will let you, but if not, you are going to be my date to my brother's wedding. Deal?"

Then and there, standing on the back porch of his house, with the rising sun on her face and his warm breath on her face, she made the most important decision in her life for years to come and nodded.