Prologue

I never knew that she could do that. I always praised her to everybody saying how perfect she was. She was everything to me and I gave her everything even my heart but she broke it. She called me at her house since her parents weren't home to talk and I went happy to spend the little time I had with her even if we wouldn't do anything she said she wanted to save herself till we graduate and I accepted. When I reached her house I was so happy like the fool I was but when she opened the door when I saw the way she looked at me I knew something was wrong and she broke up with me but when I asked her why she said I won't understand as if I won't understand what she had done what she did to me. I told her what I thought that maybe it had to do with why she was held back a year I told I was looking for a reason why and if she wanted to talk i was always there I would support her if it wasn't as her boyfriend then as a friend. Then I kissed her she to shocked to react and I continued and we did it but it's what she said while I was f***ing her that got me mad, that broke me, that I was better than Hisashi and that broke me and she acted like it was nothing but maybe I was to far gone to hear her excuse to far gone to listen to the crap she was screaming at me about. I should have know the moment I didn't see blood, the moment that she was feeling it, the moment she didn't cry out in pain. I should have know but I was too stupid to see, to figure it out but no more I couldn't stay with her she broke me and I couldn't take it and walked out in the rain.

When I reached home the house was quiet my parents had already gone for their second honeymoon to celebrate my dad's promotion. But the loneliness was choking me crushing me destroying the last piece of sanity I had and I just couldn't take it I just broke down and cried I couldn't remember the last time I cried like that. I couldn't for the love forget that and I just cried till morning but what shattered me was the news I received the following day.

I didn't want to go to school after what happened yesterday night so I just skipped it. I couldn't see their faces because I would kill him my best friend, the one true friend I had Hisashi Igo. But when it reached noon I had a knock at my door I thought that it was Saya Takashi and I didn't want to face her so I didn't open the door and just let her keep knocking but the knocking continue that wasn't her it was the police and what they told me just crushed me into despair into the depths of insanity.I roared out and tried to kill one of them for telling me those lies for breaking me again, for telling me that my parents died in a plane crush coming back home that it was an accident but I wanted something to let out my frustration on to tell me that everything is a lie that I was dreaming but that didn't happen they knocked me out and sent me to the hospital.

I didn't want to talk to anyone only to wallow in my depression, to just die. Saya did come to see me I told her everything, what happened that night what happened to my parents. She tried to comfort me but I just didn't want to listen to her so I just tuned everything out and just looked at the ceiling not caring. That night I couldn't take it being in the hospital and just escaped back home. The house lonely devoid of life no a soul it was no longer my home just a house. I just couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to die so I walked into the kitchen and just took a knife and just slit my wrists waiting for the darkness to devour me to just fall into the abyss to just sleep and escape to my peaceful dreams of the happy times but that didn't happen what happened next will no would change my life for ever.