20 Memory Lane — I

2 years ago

~flashback~

It was a regular mid-summer day in L.A. The conference room at the main office of Grayson Publications was abuzz with the chatter. A round table discussion with the publishing firm's main personnel was in motion behind the doors in front of us.

I was standing with my back stuck against the wall opposite the door, waiting for my name to be called for the final presentation which would have decided my fate in the city's biggest publishing firm. If my pitch gets through, I would be promoted from an intern to junior copywriter.

I was excited and felt nauseous at the same time.

I looked to my right and glanced towards Max who was standing next to me staring at his own two feet. He had been weirdly quiet for the longest time now. Something wasn't right about it.

I nudged him with my elbow, "You okay, babe?" I asked.

Startled, he looked at me. "Um, yeah. Yeah," he gave me a half-hearted smile.

Something was definitely not right.

"Max, are you sure? You look like you're going to puke," I said studying his face.

It looked so very pale. Like he had been sick or something.

"I'm fine," he mustered up a smiled. "Just nervous."

"I know. I am too. But I'm also kind of excited, you know."

His expression turned worrisome, "Only one of us can get in, Sky. What if you do and I don't?" he whispered through the rising chatter. Their loud voices were being carried outside the room.

"Then we'll find you the next best thing, Max. Or me. The odds for us are 50-50. We have talked about this already. Whatever happens, it won't matter because at least one of us will be a step closer to achieving everything we want," I reached for his hand and pressed it lightly. "We're in this together."

"Yeah," he smiled lightly and turned his gaze ahead.

Natalie, the person responsible for our internship evaluation, walked in our direction.

She looked at Max and smiled through her cherry lips, "I hope you're ready. This presentation is going to decide your future at this firm."

"Yeah, I am," Max smiled back at her with confidence.

Turning to me she said, "And you?"

"Ready," I nodded.

Natalie gave me a half-smile and trotted away in her black bodycon dress which hugged her cinched waist like it was sewed onto her body. She disappeared behind the conference room doors.

Ever since I had joined this firm as an intern Natalie had always given me the uncomfortable vibes. She never looked at me for more than a second and always talked to me as though I wasn't good enough for some reason.

I never knew what I had done to make her feel that way about me. She never said anything to my face but the way she presented herself in front of me was proof enough to shed light on her feelings about me.

Max, on the other hand, she liked. But, I guess that was true of any girl. Max Jones was a sight for sore eyes.

He was charming, a smooth talker. His deep blue eyes had a mystical allure about them. Coupled with his raven hair and his athletic figure, Max was always someone who turned heads wherever he went. Not to mention he played varsity football at our college.

All of that and he had a flair for writing.

Perfect didn't even begin to cover him.

Max and I had known each other for most of my life. We grew up in the same neighborhood, went to the same school, and ended up going to the same college as well.

Despite knowing each other our entire lives, it wasn't until the second year of college that we started liking each other. We both had English as our major and were both in one of the college literary clubs. That was where our story began.

In a group of 7 strangers, we were the only people who knew each other from outside of college. The more we met, the more we talked, and the more I started to fall in love with him.

Like most love stories, ours didn't have a straight ascending graph either. It took a few months for Max to realize his feelings for me and by the time he did, I was already dating someone else. I never confessed my feelings to him but always felt like it was mutual. He gave me reasons to feel that way but was too late to act upon it.

By the time I broke up with the other guy, it was time for Max's graduation. We had spent 2 years together, making poetry, writing stories, falling asleep together on the library floor as we read to each other and neither of us had ever confessed how we felt towards each other.

Finally, a month before his final exams, Max confessed to me how he felt about me. I remember how I had jumped off my seat and right into his arms, accepting his declaration of love.

However, our time together was short. He was graduating and I still had another year ahead of me.

But we made it work.

Despite my best protests, Max dropped his dream internship which would have had him move to New York. He stayed back in L.A. and worked on some freelancing writing gigs.

I was bittersweet about Max staying back and letting go of the internship he worked so hard to get. I tried convincing him for months to reconsider but each time he ended the conversation saying "I don't want to be away from you."

And each time my heart would melt. I didn't want to be away from him either.

So, I dropped out of campus housing and moved into Max's apartment.

The internship at Grayson Publications came as a ray of sun on a cloudy day.

We applied together and both of us got in.

Studying together, staying together, and now working together. Life couldn't have gotten better for both of us. I was happy. Happier than I had ever been in my entire life.

After the childhood that I had had, being with Max made me feel secure and loved. I had never felt happiness like that. I woke up to his face each day and slept in his warm embrace each night.

Everything in life was perfect for the first time in my entire life.

And that should have been my first clue.

It was the kind of calm and quiet one usually witnesses before a storm.

A storm was brewing. And I was not aware of it.

Not in the least fucking bit.

This was the last day of our internship. In this six-month-long internship, Max and I had worked together and like any other normal couple, we also had our differences and mindless quarrels from time to time. It wasn't anything that was out of the ordinary. Nothing to stress over.

It was normal.

Or so I thought.

Two months before the end of our internship we were told that only one of us could get in the final spot. Only one intern could get a final hold as a junior copywriter at the biggest publishing firm in the city.

As a 21year old, with not much to lose, I embraced this risk. But it sent Max off the deep end.

He grew worrisome about his position in the firm and his relationship with me. We had long conversations about his paranoia. Even though he never said the words, I knew the fear that had been eating away at his mind. He had already dropped a year and stayed back to be with me. He couldn't afford to lose this internship as well.

I could read the fear in his eyes as night after night, he grew distant. Something was changing. But each time I brought it up, he denied it.

So, I put it out of my mind and began to work on my pitch as he worked on his.

Max didn't want to share our ideas. He wanted to be strictly professional about this and even though I found this a bit weird, I supported his decision.

"You're up, Skylar," Natalie came up to me and announced.

I took a deep breath in and smiled nervously. "Wish me luck," I looked at Max.

He smiled back at me with a far-off look in his eyes. It was as though he was with me but still not quite there.

"Good luck, Sky," he said.

I frowned at the look on his face, "Max, are you sure you're okay? Is something wrong?"

But before he could say another word, Natalie interrupted. "Skylar, we can't keep the bosses waiting."

"Right," I slowly looked away from Max. "I'll see you after."

Taking a deep breath and clearing my mind of any invasive thoughts, I stepped away from his side and walked towards the door in front of me.

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