1 The Beginning of the End

"Riona, listen. I love you and all but I don't think I can do this any longer."

"Oh come on Asher. Just give me one more chance. I promise I'll do better."

"That's what you said last time."

"Well, last time was different."

"How? Tell me how last time was different."

"Last time was different because I was trying to cook a new recipe. I'd never made lasagna before that day."

"Well that's why we have the internet, honey. This is just a whole other level of failure." He stabs the food with his fork and as he raises it, the mac n' cheese follows, in the shape of the bowl. I can't help but laugh.

"Ok fine, we stick to ordering in forever then." I throw my hands in the air in exasperation.

"Hallelujah!" He exclaims and jumps up from his seat to hug me.

"What about when this little monster pops out?" I ask, rubbing my belly.

"Well her favourite food is going to have to be pizza or Chinese." He laughs and places his hand on mine.

I've been pregnant for five months now and it feels like a whole freaking year. If this is how my mother felt then I don't blame her for not waiting 9 months before getting me out of her.

"You should go take a bath, I'll clean up here and find something to do with this monstrosity you call food." I hit his arm playfully and he laughs, helping me up.

"Come on Sam. Bath time."

Sam. My golden retriever therapy dog. I've had him since Ash and I started dating. Ash had him registered as a therapy dog since he was a puppy, to a clumsy, crazy old lady with a drug problem – the best description of me that there is.

As soon as he hears the word 'bath', he gets up from his spot on the sofa and runs ahead of me to the bathroom to run a bath. He gets my bathrobe and slippers and places them on my bed before I enter the room. Sometimes I wonder if I'd ever be having my bath at night, or ever, if I didn't have Sam.

After a warm bath, I comb my hair and enter the bedroom to find Asher already lying under the covers with the side lamp on.

"37 minutes. I had to have my bath in the guest bathroom." He says after looking at his watch on the table.

"Shoot! I really thought I was quick this time." I take off my robe and Ash lets out a wolf whistle.

"Oh shut up, I know what I look like." I laugh as I go under the covers.

"Sam it's time for bed." In less than a minute, he rushes into the room, dragging his overly large doggy bed with him and sets it right at the bottom of the bed.

"You look like an angel."

Asher pulls my face closer to his and just stares. I surprisingly don't break eye contact, the old me couldn't look a person in the eye for more than two seconds, but here I am gazing into his eyes like a loon.

"I love you so much, it's unhealthy." I groan as I bury my head in his chest and he lets out a small laugh.

"Well I love you more than you love me and don't even argue because you know it's true." I just smile and wrap my hands around him as far as they can go with my slightly large belly in the way.

We revel in the silence, just enjoying the company before he speaks again.

"I almost forgot to tell you, I'm going away tomorrow. It's work."

"How long?" I hate it when he travels mostly because I start to feel alone again and knowing myself, it's not very healthy; especially not in my current condition.

"Just a few days. It won't be up to a week, I promise."

"Where's it going to be this time?"

"It's Berlin. I'll be back before you can say 'Asher's the best'."

I just smile and nod, finally feeling sleepy for the first time in 3 days – for which I am grateful. I honestly didn't believe the doctor when he said there were days that insomnia would kick in no matter how tired I was.

"I love you Ree." The last thing I hear before drifting off to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My eyes flutter open and rest on the alarm clock on the bedside table. It had 8:37 written in bright red. Asher must have disabled the alarm for 7:30 or maybe I just slept through it. Either way, I'm thankful for the extra sleep.

I turn to face Asher but he's not in bed. He must be getting ready to leave. Reluctantly, I get up and put on my slippers and robe before sluggishly making my way to the living room.

"Ree?" Ash calls from the kitchen and I hear slight sizzling.

I poke my head into the kitchen to find a beautifully decorate plate of eggs, bacon, and 2 slices of toast, one with a chocolate spread and the other with mayonnaise and pickles on it on the table. I guess he's used to my weird food combinations by now. They've been around for the past 3 months.

"Awwn Ash. You shouldn't have." I walk over to the table and take a seat.

"I didn't. This is all mine." He laughs and places a cup of warm apple juice with a slice of lime in it on the table.

"I appreciate the effort but I just have to say that pickles and mayo is just nasty."

"But you're still going to eat it aren't you?" We have a mini staring contest but I eventually give up and dig into the food.

He sneaks in a kiss before dragging his chair closer to mine. He sits and watches as I unattractively gobble down the food in front of me.

After a few minutes of me being very uncomfortable with his staring, I turn to him.

"You're a psychopath. You know that right?"

He just laughs and picks a slice of bacon from my plate.

"What time's your flight?"

"9:15." I stare at him wide-eyed. It's 8:45 now.

"Are you crazy? You could miss your flight. Get going!" I hurry him up and rush him to the door. His bag and briefcase are already by the coat rack. I never understand why he only ever has 1 bag when he's traveling. That can't be everything he needs for a week. Right?

"Bye Riona. Love you." He kisses me and gets on one knee, holding my belly.

"Goodbye to you too Watermelon. Daddy loves you more than mummy." He kisses my belly and rushes out the door.

"There is no way I am naming my child Watermelon!" I call after him as he rushes down the hallway of our apartment building laughing maniacally.

I shut the door and head back into the kitchen to finish my breakfast and clean up.

"Sam, bath!" He comes running in from the room with his bed.

"At least I have you to keep me company."

12 HOURS LATER

I walk into the living room with my hair still wet from the shower I just had.

32 minutes. I'm getting better.

Today wasn't completely wasted. I got in a little exercise on that dreadful rubber ball after Asher left in the morning; I did a little reading and even got some laundry done.

It's 9:25 and I have nothing else to do so I might as well just call it a day. As I walk into the room, my phone rings. Hoping that it's Ash, I rush to it on the side table and answer it without checking the caller ID.

"Hey Riri." Only one person calls me that annoying nickname.

"Oh hey, sis." My twin sister Korra.

"Are you alright?"

I move the phone away from my ear and check the caller ID. It says it's Korra but I'm very confused. My sister never asks if I'm alright. We're best friends and all but there has never been a reason for her to ask me that. At least I haven't heard her ask that in a very long time.

"Yeah I'm okay. Are you?"

She completely ignores my question and throws another.

"You said Asher travelled this morning when I called you earlier right?"

"Yeah. He should be in Berlin by now. I want to wait till tomorrow before I call. He'd be jet-lagged so I'll let him rest. It is an eleven hour flight. Why?"

"Did he by chance take Regan airlines?"

"Yeah he did. Why all these questions Korra?" I'm starting to get irritated by them, my impatience slowly surfacing.

"So you haven't seen the news tonight?" She sounds very agitated, something must really be wrong.

I rush to the living room and turn on the TV, surfing through till I find a news channel.

"You know I don't like watching the…" Before I finish my sentence, I stare at the screen horrified.

The headline reads 'No survivors after Regan Airlines Boeing 737 passenger plane in transit to Berlin, Germany crashes this afternoon'.

Korra is still talking but I can't hear a word she's saying. The only voice I could hear was the reporter's.

"It appears that some of the bodies have been identified as of this evening and their families are being contacted to relay the tragic news. Here is a list of the identified."

Names and pictures start popping up on the screen and it's not until I see 'Asher Caleb Daulton' that I lose it.

Moments pass before I realize that I'm on the ground, my whole body shaking. I can't really find the tears to cry, I am shocked, to say the least. I don't think there are words to describe what I'm feeling right now.

"Riona! I'm coming over right now. Riona please answer me." I stare at my phone on the floor and as I look back up at the TV, the nausea creeps from my abdomen to my head as the world slowly goes black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Asher please don't leave me!" I cry as he moves further away from me.

"I'm sorry Ree. I love you." He fades into the light shining brighter behind him.

"Asher! No!" He disappears and the light instantly dies, leaving me in the darkness.

"Ash." I close my eyes and whisper, mostly to myself but also with a slight hope that he'd hear and come back to me.

I don't like being alone.

I wake up with a jolt, screaming, as tears race down my face.

"Asher, no! Asher!" I continue screaming.

I'm in a small unfamiliar room, with the walls painted blue and white and a small TV hanging on the wall in front of me. A heart monitor was beeping beside me, reminding that unfortunately, I had life and he didn't.

"Riona. Riona please calm down." Someone rushes to my side, holding my hands and crying.

I slowly turn my head to look up. It's Korra.

I stop screaming but with the tears still streaming, I look into her eyes and whisper.

"Please tell me it's a lie. Tell me it's all a bad dream." I stare at her with a sad smile on my face.

"I'm so sorry Ree. I am." She too has tears slowly streaming down.

I ignore her words and wipe my face with my palms.

"Where am I?" I ask, surveying the small room.

"Saint Peters. When I got to your apartment you were lying on the ground unconscious so I called 911. I was so scared Riona."

I look out the window and the sun was high in the sky.

"What time is it?"

"It's 3 pm. You've been out since yesterday. I've been so worried."

I had no more words, so I just pull her closer to myself and silently weep into her chest, thinking to myself that this has to be a dream. I was just having a very bad dream. A nightmare.

It has to be.