1 Where We Used to Be

J is a very special person who got me to try new things and do new stuff. I never would've thought I enjoyed them, but after I tried them, I actually liked them. It's one of those crazy circumstances where you start to notice something because the person you like likes it; in my case, I genuinely began to like video games and anime and stuff like that. He shared a lot of new things with me that I never would've thought of trying.

But there's this game called Xenoblade Chronicles, and J sent me a bunch of links to different parts of the soundtrack that he thought I would like. Sweet of him, right? One in particular stood out to me, called "Where We Used to Be". I loved it because it sounded so bittersweet, and reminded me of how I felt about J. I wanted to be with him, but I didn't want to say anything because I had no clue how he would respond. So I was, and I still am, stuck in this stalemate.

But another reason I really liked this song was because J learned to play it on the piano. And the way our class schedules worked out in senior year was that even days he had band second period while I had home study. I would come into the band room during my home study and sometimes even earlier to listen to him in the jazz band, and in the intermittent times between jazz band and symphonic band and second and fourth period, he would sit down at the piano and play. And after sharing "Where We Used to Be" with me, J started playing it on the piano.

So now try imagining me leaning against the piano in the band room with a bunch of other busy people making noise in the room, watching the guy I liked play the piano. Every time this happened, time just seemed to stand still and everything tuned out. I was truly and utterly focused on listening to J play a song I loved. And silly little me would fantasize that he learned to play it just for me.

Even now as I'm typing this I'm listening to the song and I'm reminded of him. I can't help but close my eyes and transport back to that time when J would play the piano and I would just listen as he played something that I wished was just for me.