4 I will never have a mate.

James pov

I also felt my heart hurt when I rejected her. I thought that I don't have a wolf so as we are not deeply connected we will not feel any pain but it did pain. I felt somehow empty and lost. It felt very uneasy. Seeing her cry was even more adding of the pain. She was begging me to give her a chance. But how can I? How can I when I can never give her the love at all. I never wanted to have a mate. I never wanted have a weakness like my brother.

My big brother who was supposed to be Alpha now. But he died. How? Because of his mate. He was my best friend, my brother, my helper and my partner. He was very strong. I always admired him. But one day he also found his mate,his weaknesses. And one day, we were attacked my by Roger's. That day his mate died too. He couldn't stand that. He cried each and everyday. I was probably 10 years old. I tried to talk to him. But he never listened. He went to depression. And after 7 days he killed himself.

How could he kill himself. He never even once thought of me,mother or even father. We were also his family. But he left us all. That day I was shocked to see my brother's dead body. My mother crying in front of him and father was totally broke.

That time I was just looking at them. Not even a single drop of tears fell down of my eyes. I looked at the person lying on ground. He was weak, looser and a pathetic person who abandoned his family and died cowardly. He wasn't my brother who I looked with admiration. He wasn't strong. He was weak. He wasn't that person who told me to never give up. He just wasn't.

At that time,I promised myself that I will not die like him. I will not be a weak like him. I will not have any weakness. I will not have any mate.