A New Journey
"... what's the point of everything? why am I even in this world?" Lying on the water, I blankly looked at the Sky, now knowing what to even do. honestly, what's the point anymore? go stronger for the sake of growing stronger? survive for the asking of surviving? enjoy life for the sake of enjoying it? What was the point of living, was there a reason for anything I did?
"I don't know. I only know what you know plus what you avoid to accept." The other me said softly while lying next to me, he too looking at the sky with a blank look.
"I guess thats an answer I wish to find out, what's the meaning of all of this? Can I truly become perfect, what is being perfect? is that nothing more than a concept? How did I come to this world? Why am I here..." I said softly to which my other half slowly nodded,
"So tell me... tell me everything about myself. how can I set off to learn about this world without knowing about myself?" I asked softly, to which my other half began speaking while controlling the water under us to show images, things that I hid away, and many things. I got to learn a lot more about myself, and I came to realize just how imperfect I was. I was a flawed man from head to toe.
Although sometimes my other half said I managed to fight back against, leading to my other half also learning something new as well. this was my true self, but it didn't mean I knew everything. but we were able to work together, and in the end, we came to truly understand who I was before we both broke apart, fusing.
That day, I got to fully comprehend myself, following which I fused with my subconscious self, allowing me to be a person who is self-aware of himself. this allowed me to be in full control of myself, and even sense deeper limitations within my mind,
Opening my eyes, I sat up from the waterfall, only to find myself surrounded by all 8 of the tail beast. they all looked at me with a worried look, which made my eyebrow raise in confusion
"Karama... we just want to talk, we are worried about your mental state," Matatabi said softly, confusing me slightly. what did they mean by this? seeing this, Chomei spoke.
"Matatabi was worried about your weird actions and the weird aura you gave off, so we went to the throne room to see what happened... we can't ignore what we saw," Chomei said softly, to which I nodded slightly. I looked at all of them for a moment, easily seeing through the fact I was trapped within a barrier. they didn't want to attack me, they had a chance to do so when I was sitting down lost in my mind.
"There is no need for that... I realized my wrongdoing. And for that, I'm worrying. I was going to absorb you all, making me the biggest traitor." I said softly while walking towards Gyuki who was brought back to help them. but seeing me walking towards him, he was uneasy.
fort he past few months, he had been in a complex state, questioning everything he had done. leaving as a mortal was... worse than hell, he needed to eat, he needed water, he needed sleep, time passed so slowly, and so on. it was killing him, to make things worse humans... he never realized just how hateful they could be at times. why did something they needed to survive cost money? There were shinobi out there who could create a whole garden with ease.
there were shinobi out there who could control the weather, so were people struggling to get water? these humans were greedy, and he came to fully understand and slowly side with my former self. Humans needed a leader, they needed someone to show them the right way, if not then they would kill each other...
"I will not say your point of view was right or wrong, it's just the way you went about it... using the bit of respect I have here, I will revoke the punishment I gave you, and in return, I give my position to... Chomei." I said calmly while looking deeply at Gyuki for a moment, before walking past him, shattering through the barrier without trouble, a scene which shocked them all.
why was they shocked you may ask? because they were sure even if I was in my Kurama Sage mode, I shouldn't have been able to break free so easily. Yet I did, leaving them all stunned. but I have been reborn, I have gained true inner peace, and become one with my true self. this led to my power reaching new heights, and my control of my chakra reaching new heights.
in return, this meant that the Grim Reapers I eat were being digested much easier, allowing for my power to not be fully drawn towards protecting my life. this state of being allowed me to have perfect control of chakra, reaching this level of self-awareness meant a full understanding of one physical body and mind.
chakra was a combination of physical energy, and spiritual energy, so with me being fully aware meant that I was fully in control of myself. allowing for my strength to just reach new heights,
I teleported everyone back to my throne room, where everyone was shocked to find that I had chained myself up, reading to face my punishment, after all, I couldn't just ignore my crimes.
"W-what happened?" Chomei asked, confused about this whole matter. everyone was worried for me, I pretty much just had a mental breakdown a few hours ago, leading them all to group up, even freeing Gyuki. they were not sure if I would suddenly attack them, so they were ready to fight me.
with all of them working together, they had a good chance of defeating me, and with my mental state at the time, the chance of winning was high, plus the fact I would have been in a weakened state.
"My hatred for humans... it blinded me. there is no justification for anything I did, I was going to try and become the new 10 tails, thats all you need to worry about." I said calmly, my eyes pure and cleared. there was no hatred, no self-pity, and anything of the kind. it was not indifferent, as a pure and open outlook on life filled my eyes. A look for learning and understanding this new world.
"... No, for the best punishment, we need to know the root of the problem. if you were suffering all these years, we are partly to blame for not helping our siblings." Chomei said seriously, I looked around and everyone nodded slightly, agreeing with her words.
"Sigh... I wanted everything I went through to be worth something, all of that couldn't have been pointless. why am I here? why am I the strongest tail beast? so I told myself I was special, meant to be a perfect being. yet again and again, my view was twisted, Madara, Hashirama, Mito, Kushina, and Naruto. all their actions only pushed me deeper and deeper into this genjutsu I cast upon myself. I was a fool, Naruto's last jutsu pushed me over the edge, but he also cast a genjutsu on me, forcing me to go to the waterfall of truth... where I was forced to face the truth." I said softly, making everyone quiet,
"I did was worth thing possible... a true death should be a fitting punishment," I said softly, leaving them all shocked once more. I was not going to run away from my crimes, that would be cowardly. I accepted myself, my good, and all my evil. so, I will face punishment,
But they couldn't give me such a harsh punishment, instead, they banished me to earth, with the task of making up for all my wrongs as a mortal. this punishment I took without another world, and with a thought I brought many people I wronged back to life, most of Mito's friends, family, and children.
Naruto and Kushina were also brought back to life, I could only smile seeing Naruto smiling as if he expected this to happen. I just nodded at Naruto, before a statue of myself formed sealing my power and strength away, before I disappeared, leaving the rest of the tail beast quiet, before they searched for where I left to... but they couldn't find me. I didn't want to be found in my journey to find the meaning of everything.
So, I changed my appearance with the remaining power I had, becoming a black-haired average-looking man, with only the clothing on my body, I walked through a desert, without anything covering my feet...