SykoNex
Wasted potential. You had the cool dementor story going on but when he eats Sirius's soul he turns into a freaking toddler. He finds a secret room, becomes a 10 year old boy by constructing a body in 2 months and some how escapes the prison. Then you just had to make Sirius's soul influence the MC so much that now this 17yr toddler is going to protect the black family in his name because the MC feels bad for devouring him.... Gah such a disappointment in writing.
I'm going to give the first ACTUAL review. When making a review you don't do it because you like the novel but you want to give critique, saying that it's good or it's bad overall is unproductive. The writing quality and grammar is alright, the author can improve if he goes back and looks at other references to better convey the story. There has been some improvement in later chapters. Stability of updates is perfect but a bit shaky when the author tries to force chapters out because of the reader's demand. It's best to take the release of chapters step by step even if it takes you 50 years. Story development was interesting at first but the starting chapters of who the main character is doesn't correlate much with the later chapters, it's understandable since he got the mother figure and family that he's always wanted but a few years is a bit too short for change in my opinion. But it's fine since the story is still salvageable and it's also stable though I feel that some readers are getting pretty bored from the slug pace of the development. I've never watched or read Harry Potter so this is pretty much a blind road for me that I know a small bit of knowledge of. Character design is good but you can improve by trying to show more of what characters are feeling, I don't feel a connection with the characters since they feel like puppets with a small bit of emotions. World development is fucking Harry Potter, the author is sticking with that world's development besides the variable called the MC.
I am not sure what to say about this story, not really bad, the author forgets a few facts at one time or another, but the line still goes well, my complaint is quite peculiar though. The author started the book with a mc having everything to follow the dark side, ****, being a dementor is a good part of it, but the protagonist incredibly does not retain hatred in the heart after reincarnating, not even a basic fear of protection against others. . okay, he "knew" that others probably wouldn't hurt him, but the human heart is unfathomable and the protagonist's heart looks like a clear mirror compared to that. Another thing is the ease with which the plot unfolds and certain convenient things, some characters even look extremely different, unless the author is using a text from the original book. Finally, to summarize, the idea is good, the application is bad.
Waste of time don't read it. The idea is interesting that MC is reincarnated as dementor but then he turns into a human some extra soul powers. The MC behaves live toddler and joins the golden trio in a manner that don't make sense, cries like a baby and grammer is terrible. Please save your time and don't read this novel
All the complaints about him turning into a toddler, pretty much because he has emotion. Complaint about somehow escaping the prison, that you know he was supposed to guard... Then another complaint about Sirius's soul influencing the MC so much that he is now going to protect the black family in his name because the MC feels bad for devouring him.. I think it's perfectly reasonable, to feel indebted to a man you accidentally killed... Not the mention they become his genuine family shortly after by you know, being the first people to have ever cared for him... There is no problem with most of the development, anyone complaining about it just has a personal preference. Now for the ACTUAL review. Writing Quality: Some mistakes here and there, clearly improving as he goes. Stability of Updates: Very good, unfortunately some things happened recently so it's on temporary hiatus for now. Story Development: Most of the story is the same as the standard Harry Potter story, do note that we are following the MC in this world, it's not about the main story. And that story is also due to change in time. Character Design: Love the character, a lot of potential. Some minor, not sure what you're doing. But overal just fine. World Background: I mean it's harry potter, what more do you want? ;) Now if you're going to complain about the high score, note that I believe the story is undervalued.
I had the Idea after reading the history of Azkaban, since college is out for the summer I will be working on this as entertainment. I'll try to make sure the chapters are at least over 1k words. But if the point I want to get across in the chapter doesn't take that long I may delay a chapter and release 2 chapters together.