5 A Mother's Worry

Please come back, Izuku.

Katsuki sat at Izuku's bedside for an undetermined amount of time before he was dragged kicking and screaming into Morpheus' thrall.

Mitsuki sighed, spotting the edge of her fallen son's uniform from the window in the door. She'd allowed him some alone time with Izuku-kun whilst she waited in the hallway. She entered the room as quietly as possible, trying not to disturb the rest of her son. She cast worried looks at her two children, one who had barely escaped from death's grip, and the other who had silently worried himself to sleep.

She brushed blonde locks softly, trying to impart some reassurance to her son. His brows were furrowed even in his sleep, not able to escape from his worries and regrets as his subconscious tormented him. She had hoped that he would be able to get some form reprieve in his sleep, but it looked like it wasn't happening.

He was lying prone on the edge of Izuku's bed, one hand reaching for Izuku's. His fingertips were barely touching Izuku, as if afraid of inflicting further hurt on the other, whilst simultaneously reassuring himself that he was there.

She hadn't seen her son look this vulnerable in years. He hadn't allowed himself to be vulnerable. She knew he his ego had been developing to, frankly, unhealthy levels, but she hadn't known that this change would have hurt Izuku deeply. She'd thought that the two of them were engaged in friendly bickering, and that was what she had gathered from the way Katsuki had muttered about him with complaints, about him being 'shitty Deku'.

When she looked at Izuku-kun, she couldn't help but suck in a breath of shock. He looked markedly different from how she saw him mere hours ago. He was so pale. The stark contrast of the red line going into his skin caused her to feel nauseous. His adorable freckles stood out sharply on this pale skin. Usually, they were hardly noticeable unless you got close. She could almost feel the lingering, cold, bony fingers of death trying to drag her second son into its embrace.

She longed to see her second son open his eyes and flash his pretty smile at her. She wanted to see green eyes light up as they gazed at Katsuki.

Izuku-kun, her heart cried out. It was aching and swelling with worry and concern. Her heart was weeping silently. She considered Izuku a son to her, just like Katsuki. These feelings had become especially pronounced after she learnt that Inko had passed away in a Villain attack, which was consequently followed by Izuku finding his father's body hanging in their apartment barely two months later.

To learn that he had been driven to suicide had triggered every single protective motherly instinct she held inside her, especially because it was the cause of her fucking son's actions.

The two of them had been as thick as thieves in their younger days. She wasn't quite sure when it had changed, but she swore to herself that she would make this right.

Mitsuki allowed silent tears to fall as she gazed at the two teenagers. She allowed herself to cry for Katsuki, who didn't allow himself. She cried for Izuku, who had gone through suffering, loneliness and uncertainty. She cried for herself, who had almost lost a son.

She had been blind to everything that he had been going through. She should have realized something was wrong when the times her son brought Izuku over had dwindled and slowly faded to nothing, no matter how often she had inquired and prodded him to.

She let out an unintentional sob. Mitsuki quickly checked whether she had unintentionally caused Katsuki to waken. She took out a handkerchief from her pocket and pressed it to her face, muffling her sobs.

She'd chased after the doctor after he left. She had just arrived at that time and hadn't heard what he told Katsuki. Every word he spoke felt like a heavy blow to her chest.

Don't know when he'll wake up, he said. She almost felt like Izuku had already crossed death's doors. She shook herself out of it. She had to stay positive. Izuku would awaken, and they would be able to right the wrongs that they had done to him.

She thanked every instinct that made her read that letter Izuku left for Katsuki when her son had run out of the house like a demon possessed. She thanked every course in university that made her an avid reader, helping her speed up her reading. She shouldn't have ignored the alarm bells that rang when she had last seen Izuku.

Mitsuki let out a slightly hysterical laugh that was muffled. Her voice was choked with tears. Thank god she listened to that little voice in her head and called for an ambulance immediately. Her stupid, fucking idiot of a son had left his fucking phone in the house. She put aside the matter of Izuku's Quirk for the time being. They would be able to discuss this when he was awake. She felt the stirrings of anger arise in her as she recalled the contents of Izuku-kun's letter. What the fuck had her son been doing?

The blonde woman grit her teeth as she pushed down the cocktail of feelings she had inside her.

Her hands trembled slightly now that she had confirmed that Izuku was relatively alright physically. He hadn't come back to them yet, but he would. He would. She took deep breaths to try and calm herself. Unfortunately, in this moment, she happened to glance down at her hands.

Mitsuki shuddered as she keenly felt the blood that was left flaking under her fingernails. She had gotten blood all over her in Izuku's apartment. She felt dizzy and faint. She felt light-headed. Her phobia was hitting her unprecedently hard. There was a reason why she wasn't a nurse or wasn't a Pro-Hero, like her son and Izuku were aspiring to be. Her teeth started chattering slightly.

She'd lived with this fear for as long as she could imagine. There hadn't been some traumatising incident where she had developed a fear, but rather, it had always existed. She thanked every god up there that she had been able to put aside her fears for her children.

It wasn't until she had let herself feel everything and stopped compartmentalizing the emotions that her phobia hit her at once.

The bloody marks that Katsuki had pressed into her almost caused her to hyperventilate. She took measured breaths and controlled her breathing, stopping herself from having a panic attack. She didn't know how she got blood under her fingernails, and she didn't want to recall.

Mitsuki flinched at the sight of crusty red. She stood up abruptly, heading to the bathroom attached to the side of the room. She still had the state of mind to quietly shut the door.

She fumbled a few times as she tried to get the tap to turn on. As the water tumbled from the taps, she pressed two hands quickly into the hot water.

Mitsuki scrubbed hard as tears rolled down her cheeks. Her breaths were coming in short pants.

She scrubbed and rubbed, until her hands were raw, but not bleeding. Never bleeding.

When she felt satisfied that she had gotten every inch of her hands and fingernails clean, she felt her heartbeat slow down significantly.

Mitsuki valiantly ignored the voice in the back of her mind telling her that she still had blood on her clothes.

Now was not the time to be weak. She had to be strong for her boys. She had to be here to support Katsuki and Izuku. She had to… call her husband?

Mitsuki gawked. She had completely forgotten about her husband!

The fumbled for the phone in her pocket, quickly calling him and informing him of what happened.

When she entered the room again, Katsuki was awake. He was staring at Izuku with a blank face.

Mitsuki enveloped him in a hug in a re-enactment of the scene from Izuku's apartment, whispering soothing words to her hurt son.

She hurt deeply for the two of them. She was still angry with Katsuki, but she knew her son didn't have a bad heart. He'd just been led slightly astray.

Come back to us, Izuku.