1 Chapter 1

He grab my hair with one hand, my dreadlocks wrapped around his arms and put in a messy pony tail. He pulled at my brain, pulling my skeleton out of my body, he kept grunting; how deep do you want it, tell me how much of this dick could you handle, he placed his arms around my neck, moved more closely in and pound the shit out of my pussy, doggy style because this is the way that I can have the most orgasim. I began to feel blister pain, but I said nothing, the satisfaction of the pain turned me on more. I began to get more wet; as a dancing dolphin, I can hear the splish splash swish; swish and the popping sounds, he kept grinding down my pelvic bone. Tears began to run down my eyes, and my body began to get more hot and sweaty. My vagina began to burn; all of the sweat and the fresh bruising it is enduring. I pushed him off. He pull me back, turned me over and ate me out. He sucked the life out of me, his pussy eating game was so on point! All I could do was hold him by the back of his head and push his lips harder up against my soaking wet pussy. Its as if I wanted to smother him with my juice. I slap myself to make sure I wasn't in a dream. I'm getting to the climax stage, I screamed stop I'm about to cum, 'cum all in my mouth' he seductively replied. I began to get weak, I could no longer control my vagina walls, my legs and body begin to feel drained, and I came. His tongue and mouth was right there to catch every drop of my vagina juice. He got up, slowly pushed his dick in me to feel the palpitation of my vagina, he closed his eyes and took in all the beats my vagina was giving off, he placed his mouth on my breast; as he was sucking on my nipples, he came; inside of me. He just stood there for an extra 10 minutes waiting for both of our bodies to cool down and relax, his dick was still inside of me. Then he pulled out and lay down next to me. 'Are you happy you met me that day in class now?' he asked, 'yes professor', I replied.

Quantum Physics of Sex

By: Faith B.

It was hard for me to phantom, that I was a divorced 22 year old with 2 children under 4. The idea that I have been with the same man, well actually, the same boy, unapologetic , unsympathetic, childish, bitch for years and for him to just drop us like we are nothing, like we are just change on the street, where only the homeless would pick up, that was fucked up. A real man would never walk out on his family. I had to move twice, quit several well paying jobs because I couldn't find anyone to watch my babies, my schedule and my children schedule just wasn't working together. I had to put on my big woman's pant and make it work. While he had all the shield and shelter from his political fucked up law family. So I decided the best way to build myself back up, on my own terms, was to go back to school and finish getting my master degree.

August 29th, I walked into my neuroscience class; after asking several classmate, to ensure I was in the right class, I introduced myself. Ten minutes later the professor walked in 'good afternoon class', he said. 'good afternoon professor', we replied. He put his bag down at the desk and wrote on the chalk board then turned around and faced us. 'Welcome to your first year of neurobiology and physics science…. My name is Doctor Howard Goringeride', he said. He walked to the front of his desk then leaned up against the desk and fold his arms. I chuckled at his unusual last name. He look at me, 'is there a joke you would love to share with the class', he asked. The class turned looked at me, 'sorry… no sir', I replied. The class focused back to his direction and he continued with his long introduction. He want us to call him Dr. Howard instead of professor, the amount of eye rolled I put on in this first class I would expect my eyes to fall out. His rules are bull shit and annoying, want us to be in class 15 minutes early, mind you his ass wasn't even 20 minutes on time today. He basically went about explaining what we could, should and would be learning and how to understand going about some experiments and theories. This whole introduction fuckery took about 1 hour, none of us can get back. I just kept repeating in my head, I hope this isn't the fuckery I would be dealing with all semester long.

At the end of class, he salute the class off and asked me to stay a little later. After the entire class walked out, Dr. Howard got up wrote an equation on the board then asked 'what type of equation is this?', 'calculus' I replied. He wrote another equation on the board then asked again 'what type of equation is this?', 'Semidefinite optimization' I quickly respond. He dropped the chalk in amusement, turned around looked at me, then looked at my student information in his log book then asked, 'Rachel… correct?' , 'yes' I replied. He continued to flip through his binder of student information then said 'you scored very high on your SAT and from the enrollment testing you have a very high IQ'. I stood there watching him with an I don't give a fuck can I leave face and said 'ooookkkk and your point'. He continued 'you have a mind of a person who have a master's in mathematical reasoning', 'ok and your point' I replied. He walked over to the front of his desk, fold his arms and said ' you have an attitude of someone who just need someone to listen', I rolled my eyes then asked 'can I leave?', he smiled then said 'if you ever need someone to talk to….im here'. I walked out of the class because I didn't want my emotions to get the best of me in front of some dick head professor who think he can cure the world of all of its problems.

Walking home to the Morris Pink house, where I currently sleep on the floor of a family friend living room; I kept thinking to myself, what is this doctor trying to do? Is he evaluating me? Is he trying to understand the definition of depth in my mind? What was his reason behind his questions? What was his reason to trying to decode me? But every question I kept asking myself I kept hitting a question mark in my own mind. I had no answer of what can make him so interested in wanting to be someone I can vent to. I won't lie though, the size of his dick imprinted through his pants; actually turned me on and got my nipples hard.

I began to feel the presence of an individual, I turned around and it was the doctor driving slowly, following me. He stopped, got out of his car, hold the passenger side door open then said 'I'll take you home… I don't mind', 'I'm ok with walking' I replied, 'I insist, let's get to know each other' he continued. I slowly walked towards him, concerned if he's going to strangle the shit out of me, rape me or skin me then eat me alive. Yes, watching too much scary movies is not a good medication for a life in battle pains already. But I took a chance, maybe he is not one of those crazy types, you know the crazy "New Detective show" type. I got in and had my fingers crossed.

While driving, 'so tell me a little bit about yourself' he asked. I turned looked at him, then turned my head back to the window, to embrace the beautiful view of the outside world from the passenger seat. A ray of sunshine trickling down the side of my face, 'you have a beautiful soul and its ashamed you don't want to embrace your beauty' he said, I looked back at him, 'what the fuck you talking about I don't want to embrace my fucking beauty' I shouted with my Brooklyn accent, pissed off. 'You don't know what the fuck I've been through and the battles I had to fight while keeping a smile of my fucking face' I continued. He pulled over, looked at me, and then said 'I have all day… and a pair of ears that enjoys listening'. Still pissed off, I laughed then said 'you got all day huh?... do you know how it feels to sleep on the floor from house to house…. Or even better take someone in nurture them back to perfect health and then lose your husband because the bitch didn't know how to keep her fucking legs close or him keeping his dick in his pants'. He replied 'no I don't', I continued, 'ok then so don't tell me about your fucking pairs of ears to listen when you cant fucking even feel the pain I'm going through….. yo just drop me off at the corner of Lewis ave'. He start the car up and drove to DUMBO. 'This ain't my fucking house' I said, he got out the car, open my door then said, 'last I remember you claim you don't have a house, you said you were sleeping on a family friend living room floor'. The pain of hearing that repeated to me came over me and I burst into tears, he held me and hugged me close while rubbing my back. 'I didn't mean to be so mean, but you need to understand people are dropped into your life at the perfect time and place for the perfect reason, so just allow someone to listen to you and love you and care for you and all that pain would go away' he said. I looked up at him, then looked at the sun setting under DUMBO, tears still running down my eyes 'I feel pain every day… and I have to be strong no matter what… I have other people I have to be strong for' I said, he looked at me then said 'I told you already…you have me now', we walked over to a set of swings that was next to the water front and sat down. 'let's get to know each other, I'll start… I'm Howard, which you already know', I chuckled, he stretched over and rub a tear off my cheeks then said 'first happy laugh out of ya…guess I'm doing good', I rolled my eyes then said 'whatever', he continued 'I have a masters in Mathematics, Physics and I also have a JD….my weeks are broken up into two pieces, first half I'm an attorney, second have I'm a professor… so and you' I looked at him, said nothing, got up and walked back to the SUV, got in and closed the door. I didn't want to open up to a guy I just met couple hours ago. I didn't want to give my soul to someone I just met couple hours ago, he's pushing my nice girl because I had to keep holding myself back from cursing him out, but he was too nice, regardless my emotions didn't care, it didn't want to give up to anybody because it have been taken advantage of for years.

For the entire 20 minutes back to my block, I said nothing just kept looking out the window, hoping and praying this is just a dream that I need to wake up from, I have convinced myself that men in this world are more like bitches than a human male counterpart. 'why is a student so smart as yourself have so much hatred towards the world?' he asked, 'why a human like you give so much fucks about my life?' I answered with a question. I tried to open the car door, it wont budge, he grabbed my arm and said 'please don't', I pulled my arm away from him and he said 'I know its been hard for you, so please just let me in… I told you I'm here, please'. The memory of the pain hit me again and tears start to run down my eyes, I began to repeat myself from earlier, 'do you know how it feels to be a 22 year old, with two children, a divorce under your belt, sleeping from one friend house to the next and the woman your husband left you for was your childhood best friend, you cured from alcoholism and drug abuse' I shouted in pain, he sat back then said 'I don't know as I said before but what I do know; I know what it feels like to be 42 years old single father and my ex wife tried to milk me dry while she was sucking on my best friends dick every day and laughing in my face… and couple days ago she called me crying about how much she is sorry and how he beats the shit out of her ass everyday… I can't say I know how you are feeling… I don't I'm not a female in your situation but from a male perspective I know', he rub the tears off my face then held my hand and said 'you are a very intelligent person and you shouldn't be going through all this pain' he started to caress my hand then said 'you said it yourself you have kids, you have to be strong for them no matter what and I'm begging you to allow me into your life to be strong for you' . This time when he hugged me the feeling that came over me was hard to explain. Letting someone back into my life, the feeling of a man caressing my pain away made me feel like a kid in a candy store and getting all the candy I wanted.

After my several breakdowns, it is now 5:15 in the afternoon, both myself and Howard sitting on a park bench again having a laugh and solving equations and trying to beat each other timing skills. Showing how boring my life really is; the enjoyment of solving math.

We drove to Central Park and walked the bike route while talking about our educational experiences. 6:30 pm, we finished walking a portion of Central park, being back at our start point I looked at my watch then said 'I have to go pick up my babies from school', 'ok… let's go' he replied. 'At least you could have asked if I wanted you to take me' I said. 'Do you want me to take you to pick up our children' he asked. I chuckled then said 'our children?' he looked at me smiled then said, 'you forgot I got a handful of mine own', 'yea I forget' I replied. He kissed me on my forehead then we got in his SUV and drove off.

7:30 pm, we got to my kids school. I got out the SUV; waiting for the kids to run out from after school as they usually do. Howard was getting the booster seats out of the trunk. I turned around and noticed he had 3 seat ready, steady and set to go. 'Why do you have 3 booster seat when you only have 1 child' I asked, my young brains huh. 'I actually have five, for my five kids' he said, with a sarcastic facial expression. I stood there shocked, he chuckled then said 'I'm kidding… the blue one is my daughter and the rest is for whenever I need it for my nieces and nephews'. I shook my head ok, feeling dumb then I hear mommy, mommy, from across the way, my attention turn to the kids. They ran to me, I embraced them both then gave each of them a kiss on the cheeks, I helped my son into the vehicle, Howard help my daughter in then we strapped both of them in. 'mommy how come we are not walking home today' my daughter asked, before I can even get a chance to answer; my son asked 'mommy who is this?' Howard walked over to my side and put his hand on my mid back; I was still in the door ways of my son door. 'I am your mom as well as yourself driver for the day' Howard said. I looked at him, he smiled then I look back at the kids they began to act happy and chanting 'we driving home today…we driving home today'. I step out of the way, Howard close the door, I got into my seat then he closed my door. Howard got into the driver seat, close the door, seat belt then drove off. While in the car driving to his daughter school, 'where do you guys live again?' he asked. I was happy that he forgot what I told him earlier, I tried to blow it off and said 'at a friend house…I'm renting a room from her'. My daughter shouted 'mommy stop lying you know we live on Jackie's living room floor.' I turned around look at her then look back at Howard and said 'at the moment renting a room'. My daughter kept putting her mouth into grown up conversation, so I look at her through the mirror and said 'one more time young lady'. She rolled her eyes then grunt and sucked her teeth, 'who you sucking your teeth at miss?' I asked sternly, she didn't answer. 'Don't make me come back there and leave you without any teeth in your mouth to suck… rude little ass' I continued. Howard then said 'miss your mommy and I are talking soon as we are finish yourself and I could have a chat ok', she replied 'ok', then my son asked 'ma who's this guy?', 'I'm your driving for the day, young man' Howard replied.

We reached his daughter school around 7:50pm, he got out the car, she came out side to the car, he held the door open for her, and she got in, then closed it. She strapped herself in then said 'hi everybody'. I was so taken back on how respectful this child was. With how much the US government and ACS get into parent's lives and business, it's hard to find respectable kids these days. Every child believe they are an adult who can say what they want to their parents because they know they parents can't whop their ass. 'Good afternoon muffin face', Howard replied, I turned around and said 'hi sweetheart', Howard continue 'muffin face this is Ms. Rachel and her kids Justin and lulu'. The kids began talking to each other about some show they all like, 'Who want some ice cream and getting to know each other?' Howard shouted in excitement, the kids follow then the kids began to chant 'we want ice cream, we want ice cream'. 'You are trouble' I replied looking at Howard, he laughed then said 'hey we all have to be kids sometimes'.

8:30pm we got to 10 Below, it's a made to order Thai ice cream shop in Manhattan. The best ice cream I have eaten well besides my Brooklyn born Haagen Dazs. The kids order what they wanted and was astonished by how the guys rolled the ice cream. Howard and I decided to just sit out the ice cream stuff. While feeding my daughter Howard kept looking at me and smiling. 'You're beautiful', he whispered, I played it off, as if I didn't hear him. He whispered again 'I love you'. That's when I got scared, 'are you guys ready to go home?' I asked my kids. 'Why the rush' Howard asked, 'because I can't do that again' I replied. I'm trying to get away, he grabbed my hand, then said 'can we have a chat outside'. I got up told the kids not to move and myself and Howard went outside. The minute the door closed behind us, he grabbed my face and we had a long tongue battle. He grasp my body into his and began to slowly move his hand across my body. Then said 'just give me one chance'. I step back, out of his grip and said 'I don't want to take chances… I want someone to love me… fuck me when I want to be fucked… walk around the entire central park, just to take in the beautiful views… I don't want just a regular relationship', 'so… what do you really want?' he asked. 'I want a superman', I replied. 'How do you know I'm not your superman…you don't even want to give me a chance to love you… I whispered it once so far and your ready to run away…oh and we did the park take in beauty stuff' he replied. I began to cry, I don't want to open up my heart to another man to have it burn with acid again. 'I cant love you' I said, then I looked him in his eyes and he asked 'why?', 'I'm scared' I replied then I began to shout 'I'm scared to love anyone because I always forget about loving myself…then after I give my all… I just get dump like trash on a New York City street…. I'm scared'. Howard grab me and pull me in and began to kiss me again then said 'I'm scared also…but I'm willing to jump off the bridge…. And I hope I can trust you enough for you to catch me', I ease the space in between us, pushing against him with my two palm on his chest then with a peculiar facial expression, then said 'one…I ain't catching no body in no body of water… and two I sure as hell won't be trying to catch ya heavy ass', he laughed then pull me in tighter and said 'I love you and taking a chance is what we need to do as humans to find happiness…. You are my happiness and', he sarcastically laughed then step back and said 'I actually was going to call out today and then cancelled the whole term… but something kept pushing me… something kept saying your life would change today take a chance and go…. And I came into class and a witty, smart, beautiful queen was right there to stir my nerve button'. I laughed then said 'so I'm witty', he kissed me then said 'we have class in the morning… but are you guys seriously sleeping on your friends floor', 'yes' I replied, then he said 'how do you guys survive… the father is alive… why won't you take him to court for child support?', 'well right now we are on public assistance and everyone in his family is either a lawyer or judge…. I went 2 times already and it got thrown out… the family knows every, and any lawyer or judge in this city… so yep'. I replied. 'But you and him had them together not just you', he said. I shrug my shoulders then replied 'at the time I was making more money than him, so they never saw it as a problem, I was taking care of him when his own parents just gave him couple hundred thousand and he blew it… I was there and this is the thank you I get back'. He grab my face and kissed me again then said 'let's go'. We got the kids and drove to my house.

When we reach to Jackie's house, I picked up my bag, about to wake the kids for us to get out of Howard's vehicle. 'Why are you waking them up', he asked, 'Cause we are home', I replied. He shook his head no, then said 'no you guys cannot be living like this'. He placed his thumb on my chin then continued 'you deserve better'. I look him in his eyes, a tear ran down my cheek, he rubbed it off. He got out the SUV, open my door then said 'let's go get y'all things'. I got out the vehicle then said 'you don't have to do this'. He place both hands on my face then said 'you are a queen you are not supposed to be sleeping on anyone's floor… you are smart, you are beautiful,… you have a healthy soul… you should never lower your standards or self-respect', 'the hotels here are expensive…plus I'm not working' I replied. He kissed my forehead then said 'I'll pay for a year for you guys to be comfortable'. We walked into Jackie's house. I open the door kids was still at the house running around from her illegal baby sitting job. I walked to my section of the apartment, grab a garbage bags and started putting my shoes and clothes in the bag. Howard looked at me then said 'give me the bag', 'this is my stuff' I replied, he repeated himself 'give me the bag', I gave him the bag, he grab my hand drop the bag, pull me closer, picked me up and walked out with me. We got back to the vehicle, I said 'you just left all our stuff up there', he looked at his watch then said 'first thing in the morning we are going to go shopping… plus there is no school tomorrow so we can run some errands'. We got in and drove off.

While in the car, 'what type of hotels are around here?' I asked. He looked at me then said 'would you mind if I just let you guys stay in the guest suite at my house', 'why?' I replied, he then said 'well its 11 in the night…the babies are sleeping… and I'm tired… we can even look at apartments for you guys tomorrow also', 'well I don't have any clothes to wear so we have to go to the store' I replied. 'I have some new sweats and t shirts I don't mind you having them… there would only be one store open also', he replied. I said 'ok' and left it alone.

We got to Howard house, his butler's and maid came outside and helped us into the guest suite of his house. He walked by the suite and gave me two(2) sweat pants and some t-shirt, he kissed me on my cheeks then said 'see you in the morning'. The maid gave me clothes for the kids, tooth brushes and towels, then she walked out. My babies was already asleep with their street clothes on, on the bed. I just left them in the main room and went to sleep in the smaller room.

I woke up back in the master bedroom, to one of the maids opening the blinds to let the sun rays in, 'would there be anything else you need madam' she asked. 'No' I replied. I sat up then said 'where are my kids', 'oh they are eating lunch with muffin face' she replied. I shockingly asked 'lunch?' the maid smiled and said 'yes ma'am it's 2pm in the afternoon…. You was sleeping all morning'. I rubbed my head, Howard walked in then sarcastically asked 'are you ready ma'am' he laughed then sarcastically continued 'good mor…oh no good afternoon sleeping beauty', the maid laughed and walked out. He came closer to my bed then I asked 'damn… did I really slept all morning?' He pointed to the clock on the wall and said 'yes you did…but you needed it…. Now take a quick shower and lets get some work done'.

It took about an hour for me to get ready. Howard myself, the kids drove in one car and 2 nannies, one maid and the security guard drove in the other car. We walked into a boutique and had the store to our entire self. 'You guys can get whatever you want' He said. The kids ran off shopping. I turned slowly walked around, he walked over next to me looking at a baby girls dress, 'we just met couple hours ago' I said. He smiled, placed both hands on my face and we kissed. His hands slowly ran down my back then rested on my hips, I took a step back coming out of the kiss and said 'we just met several hours ago', 'I know but have you ever walked int a store and saw something you wanted and no matter what you must get it' he replied. I began to blush, I knew where the conversation was going, he continued 'you are the item I want and need and I am willing to give up my teaching job for you', 'you are willing to give up your job?' I asked, he gave me a peck on my lips then said 'yes.. I am', then I replied 'what is it about me that grabs your attention', before he got a chance to answer the kids ran over with a store associate and the nannies all 3 holding 2 full bag of clothes. I turned and faced them, Howard still holding onto my hips, 'mommy and daddy your kids can shop… you guys would be here for a long time in that fitting room' the associate said. 'Oh don't worry just ring it up, whatever don't fit we will just donate it' Howard said. 'Ok' the associate replied. While the associate was ringing everything up, Howard was on the phone, then he came back to us and spoke to the nannies privately. I saw he gave them a credit card. He shake the security guards hand, then hugged the nannies then came back to me, 'well the nannies have everything in check…lets go for a walk…I have something I would love for you to see' he said, 'but my kids' I replied. 'It's ok, the nannies and security have everything down…don't worry they wont do anything to our babies'. I giggled then said 'our babies… ok'.

We left the kids boutique, leaving the kids with the nannies and security guard and drove to a designer's boutique. She welcomed us with a glass of wine and her time as my personal shopper. 'So what is the price range we are going for today?' she asked. 'I don't care about the price, once she love it give it to her' he replied, I stood there smiling hard, then she said 'wow what a lucky lady you are'. Howard gave me his black card then said 'this is for you… I will be waiting for you next to the fitting room in two hours… I have to make a run to the jewelry store… ill be back in 2 hours'. 'Ok' I replied. I took the card, first we did a peck on the lips, he began to walk to the door but then decided he wanted more than a peck and came back for a kiss. He grab my waist 'do you guys want some alone time?' the personal shopper asked. We both laughed then he walked away.

Two hours later; trying on my last outfit, a red formal party wrap gown, he stood up, after about 5 minutes I noticed he changed his outfit, he was now dressed in a nice tailored suit; amaranth color, vicuna fabric, double breasted jacket that had a sexy fitted silhouette. I didn't even notice the type of tailored pants he had on, the beauty of the red bouncing off his sexy complexion, my focus was thrown off. He pulled out a dozen roses then the designer, smiled and said 'she's ready'. I looked at the designer then look back at Howard the asked 'ready for what?', 'we have a dinner reservation' he replied. The designer walk behind me then said 'not forgetting this', she put a diamond necklace around my neck, was about to put the hanging earrings on but I stopped her, picked up the studs and kept it moving.

Finished shopping, dressing and getting my dreads touched up, we drove to a restaurant in the city. Howard made a reservation for an entire balcony seat, I was impressed. We had an entire balcony to ourselves, with a wonderful view of NYC. While eating I said 'can I ask you a personal question?' 'Sure' he replied. 'Would you be willing to take an HIV, STD and STI test?' I said. He replied 'sure no problem… ill have a doctor at the house soon as we leave here… he can test us both'. 'Ok, sounds good' I replied. I just kept wondering, he got an entire balcony seat for us at a nice restaurant, had a boutique close their store for us to shop for several hours, buying stuff left and right for my kids, live in a beautiful house with maids, butlers security guards, what is this man doing behind the scene because a lawyer or professor don't have this much money. He then asked 'why were you acting like you were scared to ask me', 'I wasn't acting scared', I replied, 'omm you were sounding a little shaky shaky there ma'am' he replied, I laughed, shake my head no. He began to act sarcastic 'what are you planning to get serious quick', he asked, 'not really but you already buying me stuff … buying my kids stuff… moving us into an apartment' I replied, 'were you guys comfortable in the guest suite? He asked, 'yes' I replied. 'Ok…so actually you guys can stay in my house', he said, I drop my fork then said 'no no no... we cant stay in your house we only met yesterday', 'it would be just like staying in a hotel, only thing is it would be more comfortable' he said, I shook my head no then said 'why are you doing so much for us, like seriously… all I did was answer your questions that's all'. He smiled then asked 'you just don't know the beauty you have on you huh…. Its not just a question you answered… you answered a question where majority of college students don't know… I asked you a question not even most math teachers know… you are a smart black woman and I'm pissed off because you just don't want to understand what you are gifted with', I rolled my eyes then snorkly said 'gifted… it's just math… that's all'. He sat back then said 'I'm doing this because a very smart well educated individual, vvvveeeerrrryyyyy beautiful and sexy as well walked into my class yesterday morning and with her smart witty mouth caught my attention and my heart'. I began to blush, then he continued 'I love a woman who can stand up to a man, answer all his questions and never second guessing herself with those answers'. He placed his hands on mines then said 'you melt my heart and I love you I don't care how bad your past was best believe your future would be wonderful'. The band couldn't have started playing Frank Sinatra at a more convenient time, we got up and dance the rest of the night away.

I woke up at 7am the next morning, to a maid in my room again, this time I wasn't astonished by someone in my room, I met her yesterday. She opened up my window blinds for some sun to come in. I stretched, sat up then rub my eyes, I said 'good morning', and she replied 'morning ma'am… I will bring your breakfast shortly', I got out of bed then said 'ok' and walked to the bathroom. When I came out the bathroom the maid was making my bed up then Howard and the kids were there with breakfast. Howard turned to the maid and said 'thank you… I got it from here', the kids jumping all over, Howard sat the tray down on the night stand and the maid left. I sat down on the bed, the kids sat down next to me. 'Good morning … You little angels know your breakfast is down stairs waiting' Howard said. I look at the kids then look back at Howard 'come on you know they eat with me next to them', 'you need to allow them to distance themselves a little…. Allow them to grow up' he said. 'They are my babies', I replied. He looked at the kids then said 'honey bunch mommy and me need to have a conversation… your breakfast is waiting for you down stairs… you guys can come back up soon as me and mommy finish talking'. The kids got upset and walked out. Howard got up closed the door and sat back down on the bed. I got up; off the bed, took off my robe, naked body all out, breast tender from the cold NYC fall breeze that blew past it, nipples raised; then lay back down on the bed and said 'it feels so good sleeping on a bed after months of sleeping on a hard wood floor', he smiled then said 'please would you guys stay', 'I can stay until I find a job' I replied, 'and what if you don't' he asked, 'well ill just go to the city and ask for help' I replied, ' you just don't want certain people helping you huh?' he asked. I picked up the banana and slowly peeling it and watching his reaction, then I slowly put it in my mouth and began to eat it. He licked his lips then said 'please stay… you guys won't be in my way at all'. I sat back and opened my legs wide, I got no reaction from him, he didn't even look at my vagina, and his attention was on my face all the time. He closed his eyes for a second, took a quick look then said 'you're not playing fair', I smiled then asked 'fair? I'm not doing anything', I got up and he became more attentive, he placed both hands over his dick, to hide that it was getting hard but I already saw it rising. I walked to the bathroom, left the door open expecting him to join me, he didn't. When I got out of the shower he was still sitting at the edge of the bed, I began to dry my naked body, hoping he would react, he didn't. I began to think to myself, maybe he's not that type of interested in me, maybe my body just isn't what he wants. 'Do you want to go out after class', he asked, I acted like I didn't hear him and started to prepare myself in front of him. He repeated his self, I turned my attention and full body towards him, my underwear in my hand and my nipples raised and hard, then said 'omm where to?', 'some friends of mines are having a get together... So you can be my date' he replied. 'But all the staff would be there' I said, 'no just personal friends' he replied. I sat down in front of the mirror and began to re-spin my dreadlocks, he walked over to me, leaned over me and asked 'do you want me to help you', I looked at him through the mirror and said 'sure'. He picked up the bees wax, placed a little on my roots and began to neaten my dreads then he said the same thing he said earlier 'you know your not playing fair right' I chuckled then said 'what do you mean... with what', then there was a knock at the door. I put on my robe Howard said' come in' and the maid open the door and said 'the doctor is here', we both said 'ok' and the maid close the door back. Fifteen minutes later the doctor came to my room, I was half dressed, bra, shirt no pants, he took 5 vials of blood from both myself and Howard, he then did an oral HIV test, he checked both of our vitals and took specimen from my vagina and Howard's dick. The doctor check the HIV test and said 'your both negative of HIV… as for everything else I will give you guys a call to tell you the results within about a week and a half'. 'Ok' both of us replied. Howard shake the doctor's hand, I waved him off, and he walked out and closed the door behind him. Howard lightly grab my face and began to kiss me, I pushed him away and said 'oh now you want to kiss me… I was just modeling all over this room naked... not even a your sexy', he smiled then sat back and said 'ok…lets wait for the rest of the tests'. I got up and got ready for class.

Reached to school, Howard went to his office, I went to class to wait for him. To the right corner of the class room 4 female's sitting together, talking loud. 'I'll say he's about 30.. 40ish… no older than 45' Jennifer said, 'screw his age…I want to know if he's married', Nicole said. Being nosey I asked 'why?' Nicole turned, looked at me then said 'if he's married that would be a hard one to snag but if he's just dating….then bam…this booty could be his'. I looked at her, with a disgusted look then she said 'shit won't you?' Howard walked in, the rest of the students following behind and began class.

Three hours later, class over, I took my time packing up, to see what Nicole had plan. Nicole walks up to Howard desk, acting seductive and said 'omm… How", Howard cut her short and said 'its doctor Howard', she rolled her eyes then continued 'ok… doctor Howard I would be needing some extra attention because I really don't understand', Howard noticed me looking at them and said 'you can come by during my office hours and I will help you', 'ok' she replied. She acted like she accidently dropped her paper on the floor, she was about to bend down to show Howard her ass but he reacted quickly, picked it up and gave it to her; she took it, they walked her out, then shut the door behind her. He look back into my direction and said 'Ms. Rachel class is over', I smiled then said 'I'm packing my bag doctor Howard', he smiled then said 'take your time honey', I was thrown off for a second, he walk to his desk and began to pack his bag. We both walked to the door, he put his arm around my waist, and we began to flirt. Nicole walk by the door and saw us, she swing the door open, pissed off and said 'are you two dating?', 'no', I shouted, she shout back ' you lying bitch'. Howard began to talk lightly and nice to deescalate the situation 'you need to calm down', he said to Nicole. Nicole began to act dramatical 'I'm going to tell the president' she said. 'Go ahead… ain't no body stopping you' Howard said. Nicole stormed off.

Back at Howard's office, I got a bottle of water out of his fridge for both of us, I gave him one, we sat on the couch and he drank some of the water. Then we began to talk about the Nicole situation; 10 minutes in; a staff member walked in without knocking, Howard looked at her then said 'you don't know how to knock', she said 'sorry but I really need to talk to you', Howard looked at me then look back at the staff member and said 'can't you see I'm talking to one of my student… you can come back when we are finish with our conversation', she said 'ok' and walk out closing the door behind her.

Howard and I talked for about one hour, before we realize it was getting late and we had to pick up the kids. We got off the couch, he came in closer, kissed me on my lips, he began to slowly move his hands down my back to my butt, I stopped him and said 'we are on campus doctor Howard', he step back then said 'I'll meet you in the car', I kissed him on his cheeks, picked up my bag, then pick up his bag and the car keys, open the door and walked out. The staff member was waiting right outside the door, 'Howard I need the paper work I asked you to look over for me about my divorce' she said. Howard looked all over his desk, then remember it was in his bag and said 'oh shit it's in my bag…let me get Rachel to bring it back'. The staff lady had a weird look on her face. Howard picks up the phone and call me. I brought back his binder with all his documents, the staff female kept looking at me, mind boggled. Howard placed his hand on my mid-back, kissed my forehead and said 'see you in a couple minutes… I'll be out... you can start the car'. The staff woman asked 'are you guys dating?' Howard looked at her and said 'Can you tell me how this is any of your business?', 'that's against school policy' she said, 'and please tell me when I said me and my student was in a relationship' Howard replied. 'So explain how she got your bag and car keys' she said, 'can you explain why your husband was sleeping with 5 different women if you gave him all the sex he was wanting' Howard replied, 'seriously, Howard?... bring my marriage in to this', she replied. 'It's called minding your business…. Don't worry about other people love life if you don't have your in order' Howard said. She sat down in Howard couch, 'now let's talk about this divorce' Howard said. And I walked out.

Ten minutes later Howard walked out. Got into the SUV and drove off. In the vehicle we began to talk about the awkwardness that previously occurred. Howard rubbed my hand then said 'don't worry hon she is nothing t o worry about'. I smiled then fell asleep. We got home, I made snacks for the kids while Howard got ready for his friends party. At 6:30 a limo picked us up. In the limo, through the window I saw Howard's eyes on me, looking at me up and down, taking in all the natural beauty I have. 'You look so beautiful… I'm glad you're not the make-up stuff type', he said. I looked at him then said 'you look handsome also in your tuxedo'. He smile then lean in and kissed me, 'you sure you want to go to this thing… we can just go back home, have some hot chocolate and watch a movie' he said, I pushed him back a little then said 'you have to go they asked you to come that won't be fair for you to not show up', 'but' he replied, 'but nothing they are your friends', I said. He sat back pissed off.

We got to the venue, there was a photo booth setup, a red-carpet type theme. We took some childish photos then walked in side and everyone shouted 'Surprise!'. He was happy, He began to shake everyone hands then he began to hug people, I just walked off to the side and allowed them to have their friend for the evening. I sat down next to the bartender for about 2 hours until Howard came looking for me. 'Where were you all night young lady' he said as he was grabbing my waist, 'I was looking for you for the past couple of hours miss', he continued and kissed my neck. 'Well it's your day so just enjoy it' I said. 'You know I can't enjoy nothing until you get involved', he replied. I smiled then the DJ came on and said 'time for this bachelor to hit the floor… hey old man let get this party going'. Both Howard and I laughed then Howard said 'lets go dance', 'no cause your friends are starring me down', I replied, 'so what I love you not them' he said. A few male friends pull him on to the dance floor, he started to dance. I got up and walked away, he noticed and followed. He lift me up and brought me back to the dance floor and gave me a long kiss. The crowd was astonished, some were cheering, we continued to kiss and slow dance for about 10 minute. Some of the staff members left after the kiss. We continued to enjoy our self as long as we could go. It was planned to be an all night event but we weren't able to do the all night thing, we have old souls. We were drunk! We got into the limo, started kissing and undressing, by the time we got to the house my dress back was open, panty and bra off, Howard only had on his pants and socks, a 40+ year old man with an 8 pack is hard to resist; he lift me up the steps. By the time we got to the room I was naked already. He locked the bedroom door and I lay on the floor with my legs wide open waiting for him. He began to suck on my vagina, then he slowly pushed his index finger into my pussy. He got no reaction, he then pushed his middle finger in as well; I moaned lightly. He didn't like the reaction he got, he got up and began to suck on my breast. I slowly rubbed his head of hair, he began to bit my nipple, I lightly screamed. He didn't like the reaction, he took it up a notch. With his pants still on he whipped his dick out, slowly pushed it in me. I began to moan, he began to hit it harder. He pushed his dick in deeper, all the way in, too deep, I screamed. He slowly moan 'yes'. He stood up, took off his pants and boxer then turned me around; pushed his dick back into my vagina then he grabbed my hair with one hand, my dreadlocks wrapped around his arms and put in a messy pony tail. He pulled at my brain, pulling my skeleton out of my body, he kept grunting; how deep do you want it, tell me how much of this dick could you handle; he placed his arms around my neck, moved more closer in and pound the shit out of my pussy, doggy style. I began to feel blister pain, but I said nothing, the satisfaction of the pain turned me on more. I began to get wet; as a dancing dolphin, I can hear the splish splash swish; swish and the popping sounds; he kept grinding down my pelvic bone. Tears began to run down my eyes, and my body began to get more hot and sweaty. My vagina began to burn; all of the sweat and the fresh bruising it is enduring. I pushed him off. He pull me back, turned me over and ate me out. He sucked the life out of me, his pussy eating game was so on point! I pinched myself to make sure I wasn't in a dream. I'm getting to the climax stage, I screamed 'stop! I'm about to cum', 'cum all in my mouth' he seductively replied. I began to get weak, I could no longer control my vagina walls, my legs and body begin to feel drained, I came and his tongue and mouth was right there to catch every drop of my vagina juice. He got up, slowly pushed his dick in me to feel the palpitation of my vagina, he closed his eyes and took in all the beats my vagina was giving off, he placed his mouth on my breast; as he was sucking on my nipples, he came; inside of me. He just stood there for an extra 10 minutes waiting for both of our bodies to cool down and relax, his dick was still inside of me. Then he slowly pulled out and lay down next to me. 'Are you happy you met me that day in class now?' he asked, 'yes professor', I replied. 'I love you' he said, I didn't answer. He looked at me then said 'I know it's hard for you to say it back, but guess what', 'what?' I asked, 'I will continue to say it until you feel comfortable saying it back to me', he said.

Woke up the next morning, 6am, I had a major hangover, I walked to the bathroom in the bedroom then went back to bed. I woke up to an alarm a second time, then realized, I don't have an alarm in my room. I turned and noticed Howard was naked, sleeping next to me, hands around my waist. I shook him, he turned, woke up then I asked 'did we had sex?' he wasn't fully awake, I shook him harder then he said 'yes honey', I asked again 'Howard did we had sex?'. I began to feel throbbing pain, I looked under the blanket to my legs and it was bruised. Then I looked around the room and noticed it wasn't in my room, he rubbed his eyes and said 'I don't know… the last thing I remember was dancing with you on the floor', 'I believe we had sex… we got drunk and had sex' I said, 'did you enjoy it?' he sarcastically asked. I rolled my eyes and tried to get up but my legs were in too much pain. He sat up then asked 'are you ok', I lifted up the cover and showed him my legs, and he got up, got the phone and called the doctor. After he got off the phone, he kept pleading with me on how much he was sorry.

Twenty minutes later, the gynecologist and our regular doctor was at our home. The gynecologist examined me 'have you had a shower yet' she asked, 'can't you smell me… I'm smell like wet sex' I replied. 'You guys had some pretty rough sex' she said. 'What's wrong' Howard asked. 'Well her walls are throbbing red… plus she still have some sperms in her…. She also has a little tare… and when I touch her clitoris I'm not getting the reaction that needs to be there', she replied. The gynecologist stood up took off her gloves then said 'no sex for the next several days… I will give some medication which will help with the pain and bruising also when shower let the water run on your vagina, don't use any soap or douching…. Just let the water hit it'. 'Ok' I said. The doctor gave the script to the maid then they walked out. The maid close our bedroom door behind herself as she was walking the doctors out. I got off the bed, rinse my self off then lay back down next to Howard, my legs wide open so my body can air dry. 'I'm sorry honey' he said, he got up and kissed my bruised thighs he lay back down then said 'do you need anything', 'no' I replied. 'Are you sure' he asked again, 'yes…I'm sure, its ok we both were drunk… it is not your fault' I replied. He placed his hand on my stomach then said 'well while you and the GYN was doing y'all examine stuff, he told me that we are negative of all STD's and STI's', 'great' I replied then I place my head on his arms and continued 'she found sperms in me…. I means deep in me', 'we aren't having another alcohol beverage… things get too wild', he said. We chuckled, he turned over and hugged me, then continued 'maybe you should just stay in this room', I got out of his arms sat up and said 'no no no... We are not sleeping together', 'please honey', he begged, 'we just met several days ago… no no no', I replied. He continued to beg. I continued 'we already had sex… you took me and the kids on shopping sprees and shit…like seriously we are moving too fast…. I don't want a Usain Bolt relationship….who knows by next month we might be married', he began to act sarcastic 'would you want to get married next month I don't mind', he kissed me, I pushed him away then said 'I'm serious… we need to chill', 'ok…. Ill step back and let you do you' he said, I turned my back toward him, he covered me with the blanket and we both fell asleep.

The doctor gave me and excuse note for school, I gave it to Howard to give to the head of his office. I stayed home several days and slept well. The pain killers kept me drowsy for the entire week and a half duration. Went back the following Monday, Howard was called in early, I went to class, the driver and nanny dropped the kids off to school. I got to class, Howard had no interest in me. 'What's the answer' he asked the whole class, I'm the only one who put up my hands, he continued to ask 'what's the answer', one of the students look at me then look at him and said 'Rachel have the answer'. Howard looked at the student then said 'would Rachel be taking your test', the student never replied back, Howard wrote the answer on the board then asked 'now do anyone… except Rachel want to explain how I got the answer'. No one said anything, I packed my bag got up and walked out of the class and went to the student lounge.

By time class ended, I was studying in the student lounge for about two hours already, the college president passed by and saw me then back step and said ' Ms. Rachel, your actually who I'm looking for… we need to see you in my office', 'ok' I replied. I got to the office Howard was sitting in there, I didn't look at him but I felt him looking at me. I said nothing, he asked nothing, the president walked in, sat down and said 'Good day Dr. Howard and Ms. Felix, we both replied 'good day', then he continued 'It has come to my attention that the two of you are in a relationship', Howard ask ' and who gave you this information?', the president continued 'doesn't matter where I got my information from are you two in a relationship?', Howard stretched over and gave me a kiss, the president put on a stern face, got up, closed the door then stood by the door with his hand folded and said 'Howard, your my buddy and all but you guys have to pull the plug on this', Howard turned and look into the president direction then said 'my personal life is none of your business… it not like she needs help with any of her work…. This young lady is very smart… and not because she is my woman but she is literally smarter than all the students in her class…. She has the IQ as proof, she has the SAT as proof… she is a very smart woman', 'smart or not it is against school protocol' the president replied, 'smoking on campus is against school protocol also but knuckle head students still do and I'm so shocked that even other professors do it as well' Howard said, 'that is different' the president replied, 'it is still breaking the rules and regulations of the school campus, the school trustee as well as the state board' Howard said. The president walked back over to his desk sat down looked at me and asked 'and what do you have to say about this Ms. Felix?, 'well I can keep my feelings off campus, I won't have a problem with hiding my affection for him while we are in class', I replied, 'not in class only… on campus while he is still your professor', the president replied. I looked at Howard, he placed his hand on my face and kissed me in front of the president, 'I said off campus', the president replied. Howard smirked, he held my hand, we got up and walked out. While walking out he had his arm around my waist, one of the office-secretary, began to stare us down, the president walked to his office door opening and sternly shouted 'off campus', Howard removed his hand off my waist, we walked out of the office.

After picking the kids up from school, we went to the park. The kids were playing on the swing, Howard and I was talking about my kids and myself moving in. 'How much would be the rent?', I asked, 'don't worry about that… you don't need to worry about paying any bills right now', Howard replied, I smiled then said 'I have to contribute somehow that's not fair', 'you are already contributing by giving me and my daughter all your love', he replied, I held his hand, he looked at me and I smiled at him then asked 'why…. I still just want to know why…. What is it about me that got you wanting to play god…and we only met what…like couple days ago', 'because I love you…. I found someone I am actually head over heels in love with and I just can't get the feeling of holding you, touching you…. Kissing you…. Making you smile… making you laugh; out of my mind….. I am in love with you' he said, he kissed my fore head then hug and held onto me, 'I love you too' I replied. His daughter ran up and hug me and my kids hugged him. I now have a family, kept repeating it to myself and I am happy that I have finally let someone in.