2.63

[Trigger Warning: Murder, stillbirth, suicide]

"Luna," Noah shook my shoulders, waking me, "Izzy's been asleep an hour now."

"Mmhmm," feeling groggy I sat up, trying to discretely wipe the sleep from my eyes. In doing so I spotted a flash of silver in the low light. Noah was holding a knife.

I scrambled back until I hit the padded headboard.

"Oh," Noah placed the knife on the duvet and raised his empty hand defensively, "I'm just doing what your System asked."

"Th-the blood?" Wide-eyed I finally felt myself properly wake up, "no, no, you don't have to do that."

"I do, you need to be stronger to protect Izzy," he reached to pull me gently to lie half on his lap, then picked up the knife again to cut at his wrist. My hands instinctively reached to stop him.

"It's okay Luna," he kissed the top of my head, "I'll watch over you both, I'm more than capable in this life to do so, just drink and let your System do all the work."

His bleeding wrist was forcefully placed in my mouth as I looked up at him indignantly. Shouldn't I at least have a say? 

My eyes drifted to the floor as I felt the warm fuzzy feeling whilst his blood filled my stomach. 

"You okay?" Noah asked pulling out a handkerchief to wipe my mouth, then his already healed wrist.

I wanted to reply, but my vision was blurred to the point I cloud see two of him.

"Luna?" His hand reached for my forehead, then he sighed, "get some more sleep, I'll wake you when Izzy wants you okay?"

I nodded and let him move me to rest, falling asleep before my head even hit the pillow.

***

"Push," a voice called out amongst all the pain. Was I still giving birth to Izzy?

"That's it, good girl, keep pushing."

"What's the point?" a desperate sob erupted from my lips in a voice both familiar and unfamiliar, either way, it was my voice.

"You're young Misstress, think of this as practice," the blurry figure I expected to be an elderly woman spoke out again from between my legs, "you and the Master can have many more babes after this one, so just push at the next contraction for me now and this can all be over and done with."

What? Why would I want to go through this hell again? Why did he do this to me?

"There we go now, be a good girl, push for me now," the voice continued to drone on as pain blurred every one of my senses until it all that was left was nothingness.

***

"Luna," a gentle familiar voice woke me, I looked up to see the face of the teenage youth I'd dreamt of before, only he was much more mature, having aged like fine wine. Still, despite his appearance, I felt nothing.

"What were they?" I asked, feeling hollow, empty, and broken.

"A girl," his voice trembled, "we had a daughter."

"Looks like I won the bet," I chuckled bitterly, my hand rose to touch the deflated stomach hiding under silk sheets. "Where is she?"

His face twitched at my question.

"I'll go get the midwife."

***

Was this a dream? Why couldn't I wake from it? Snippets of life from the eyes of an unfortunate young woman played out over and over, no matter how much I screamed and begged for mercy for it all to stop.

***

"How could you?" My scream echoed in the empty hall. It appeared to be a throne room. "Over six hundred years I've stayed by your side Lex, SIX HUNDRED YEARS."

"L-Luna," the once sunny youthful child from my previous dreams was a tall, strapping young man now, approaching me cautiously, hands extended.

"I know you didn't want her, I know she wasn't yours, but why? She was mine," the dagger in my hand trembled along with my hands, "she was all mine."

"Luna just put the blade down, let's talk about this," he took another slow step forward.

"I'm tired Lex," now my legs were trembling too, threatening to cave at any moment, but the grip on the hilt only tightened, "I'm so tired."

"I know my love, I know," Lex was now only a few steps away from reaching me.

"Why did you do it?" The dagger no longer rested on my chest, instead, now it pointed towards him, "He doesn't even give a shit about me, nobody does, I'm not even me, I, I…" The pitch of my voice rose as I hysterically cried, beginning to pace.

"I love you, Luna," Lex took yet another step, "I love you, we still have many years left in this life, this world is big and rich in energy, let's just move away and start again, I'll give you a baby, our baby."

Something inside of me cracked at the mention of a child, making me spin and plunge the dagger into his chest directly into his heart. Surprise filled his eyes as he looked at me one last time and exhaled his last breath.

What had I done?

"L-Lex," I fell to my knees supporting his weight as he fell towards me.

"Lex," I screamed, touching his face, and feeling the warmth slowly fade away.

"System initiate it," I ordered aloud whilst pulling the dagger from his chest slowly and carefully as if he could still feel it.

It was just a body. He'd have another. I'd have another. All of this was meaningless. It was just torture. I'd never allowed myself to get attached, to lay routes. This one time, this one time, and she was gone just like that.

"Are you sure Host? Once it's done it cannot be undone?"

"Aren't you tired?" I asked, playing with the dagger in my hands, my voice seemed uncharacteristically calm as I spoke to the System, "Master deserves it, after all, Lex, no we…" I was unable to speak my guilt out loud.

System sighed, "until we meet again then I 'suppose."

"I love you, but, I hope that day never comes," I bitterly laughed as I plunged the dagger into my own chest.