36 The Pain
Later that night Gordon and Charlotte were in bed. They had just watched an episode of the current Korean drama Charlotte was into, and now Gordon was sketching a new jewelry design while Charlotte read her romance novel.
Tonight she couldn't get into her book. She kept staring at the same page over and over.
She turned to watch Gordon. After a few minutes he turned to her and asked, "What do you think of it?"
"It's stunning. Will this be produced in the near future?" She asked.
"Possibly. I haven't decided yet." He answered.
"Does your wife get a say?" She teased.
"You really want me to?" He asked.
"Absolutely!" She said.
It was a rose gold pendant, a large pink diamond in the center, surrounded by rubies and pink diamonds, and morganite of various shades. It was extremely feminine.
She watched him for a few more minutes and then asked softly, "Gordon?"
"Hmm?" He mumbled.
"If you had learned I'd been involved in a scandal like Rachel's, would you have still married me?" She asked.
He put down his sketch pad and turned to her.
"You know I value cleanliness. I would've been upset at the thought of another man being with you," He said honestly. "But the thought of not being with you at all would have been intolerable to me. You are the only woman who has ever awoken in me the desires of man. You are the only woman who didn't make my skin crawl when you touched me. You are the only woman who makes me feel relaxed and able to let down my guard and be myself. I keep others at a distance but I've let you in my heart. And no other woman can take that place. I'd move heaven and earth to be with you." Gordon confessed.
Charlotte was amazed. She threw herself into his arms and sought his cold, thin lips. She kissed him with hunger and he responded with excitement.
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"Rachel, he already knows what happened in the past and he still wants to marry you. Why won't you go back with him?" Charlotte asked over lunch in a quiet restaurant.
"Because if I go back with him and we're married then his mother will release the information to the media. It will reflect poorly on him. He'll lose face. It may ruin his company also." Rachel explained.
"But Rachel, he doesn't care about any of that. He only wants you." Charlotte persisted.
"He may not care, but I care. I can't allow my past to hurt him." Rachel said.
"He's already hurting. Gordon said he looks bad. He isn't eating or sleeping well and he's drinking too much. He's hurting because he's lost you." Charlotte pleaded.
"Charlotte, I can't. I was foolish to think my past wouldn't come back to ruin me. Even more foolish to think his family might accept me. The sooner he gets over me and finds a woman worthy of him, the better he'll be." Rachel insisted.
"Don't you trust him to know his own mind? Shouldn't he know best the kind of woman worthy of him? He's strong enough to leave his family and be disinherited for you. It seems a small thing to imagine he will be strong enough to withstand any media backlash." Charlotte insisted.
"I just can't do this. I have to let him go."
Charlotte sighed. What else could she say? She had certainly tried.
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It had been a month since Rachel broke of the engagement. Michael has called her multiple times a day at first. She had turned her phone off. He sent flowers, bouquets of eleven, signifying his love for only her in this lifetime. She had not responded. Every time she ignored his advances she felt like her heart was being ripped out.
It now seemed that he had given up. She hadn't heard from him at all in the past week. That hurt even worse. She knew he had to move on but deep down, She didn't want to let go. She only did so for his sake.
Charlotte had said Gordon wasn't doing well and looked awful. People were beginning to say the same about her. Her stomach seemed to always be twisted in nausea lately. She could barely keep anything down and was starting to lose weight. She assumed it was stress related and tried to ignore it until it passed.
"Hey, Rachel, everyone in accounting is going out tonight for dinner. You should come!" One of her co-workers invited her.
"Thanks, but I'm not really feeling like socializing these days." Rachel was honest.
The more she objected the more her co-workers insisted it was just just the thing to take her mind off of her broken heart. Finally, she agreed.
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Rachel arrived at the restaurant a little later than scheduled on purpose. As the hostess led her to the reserved box her co-workers were already in, she saw the door of another one opened. She heard familiar laughter. It was Michael. With another woman.
Rachel stopped in her tracks and stared in horrified stupor. No wonder he'd stopped calling her. She wanted to be angry and hurt, but who could she blame but herself? She had left him. He was in his rights to move on. But she felt like she was dying inside. She couldn't bare to see him with another woman.
A raw, pain filled sob escaped from deep within her. It was loud enough that it caught Michael's attention. He looked up and his eyes met hers.
Run! It was the only thought that came to her mind, and so she did.
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Michael was bored out of his mind. He needed backers for his new company but he was frustrated at the wine and dine aspect of business sometimes. Mrs. Ying talked too much. He was getting a headache. He gave a hallowed laugh at some trivial joke she made. He'd much preferred doing business with her husband but Mr. Ying was in Japan on a business trip.
A loud sobbing sound came to his ear suddenly and he looked around to find it's source. His eyes collided with Rachel's. She turned on her heel and ran blindly.
Without thought, Michael jumped up and immediately gave chase. She was running for the washrooms, hands over her mouth. Suddenly she stopped. She doubled over and vomited violently just outside the women's washroom. Her trembling hands reached out for something to hold her up before she fainted.
