219 Sacrificing "Someone"

The wind continued to blow gently with no signs of stopping, moving the threads of our hair as well as the leaves of the trees. It caused the lake surface to ripple, disturbing the peace. However, it is this disturbance, this wind that created the temporary and fragile serenity between Luna and I as I stood there with a hand resting on the coarse bark of a nearby tree watching her. She looked over at me and her melancholic eyes locked with mine.

"It's getting late," I started speaking as I slowly walked over to her without saying anything else.

"There's still sometime until it gets dark," Luna looked away and towards the lake. "I'll be back in a bit..."

I stared at her in silence, then I turned my head and looked out at the lake, taking in the beautiful mountain scene. The wind really did prove to be a masterful stroke in the atmosphere, imbuing everything with a calm and mystic aura. From the leaves of the trees to the surface of the lake, and even to the air around us, it made everything seem tranquil, giving one's mind a soothing massage. Slowly, I walked over to next to her and sat down. Not directly next to her, but a few steps away from her such that there was a gap between us.

I simply sat there and enjoyed the wind and view as I waited with Luna. I'm not so sure if she wanted my presence, but I just feel like it would be best if I wait here with her. In my mind, I thought back on last night, replaying our conversation over in my head. It was obvious that something is on her mind and it is seriously bothering her. Otherwise, she would not have that look of lonely sadness on her face.

"Alevian," she started speaking in a soft and almost defeated voice after a few minutes. "You mind listening?"

"Go ahead," I muttered in response as I kept my gaze on the reflection of the setting sun in the water.

She took a deep breath and sighed. "There's been something on my mind," she said. "Someone rather...and it's been bothering me."

Someone on her mind... I am still unsure as to what exactly had occurred in this timeline, but...it must've still involved me. In this timeline, she still had that illness, but the only difference is that it was no longer terminal and could be cured. The specifics I do not know, but apparently, she went from thinking that she would die to being cured. So in this timeline, where do I come in all this? What is my role? But...if this timeline is similar and yet different from the original one, then...I should still have a rather major role. So...this person she's talking about...could it be me?

"What's he like?" I asked nervously, hoping to gather from her the necessary information I needed to determine whether or not it was me.

"He's...kind," Luna responded. "Kind and warm, always putting the needs of others before his own. Someone who would help others for no reason, someone who would be there when I need him, someone that gets along well with everyone else."

The corners of my lips turned upwards slightly as I mocked my own foolishness. To think that I would think that she was referring to me...How stupid can I get? There's no way that I am anything like the person she just described, absolutely no way... Compared to that person, who sounds rather like a saint, I am a mere monster, a monster that thinks to highly of himself.

"I've been thinking about him a lot," Luna continued. "The thing is...I have a boyfriend already."

That person she's thinking about...who could it be? Loyd? No. She has a rather large social circle and knows plenty of people outside of us. It can be anyone. But there's the question about why she would spend so much time with us? Is it to occupy her brain? To escape from having to think about him? I guess that is why.

"I don't know what is this feeling," Luna continued and brought her right hand to her chest, feeling her pulse. "Whenever I think of him, my heart rate just increases... Alevian...can you tell me what it is?"

I do not need to be a doctor to know that what she's feeling is an iteration of attraction, maybe love. I do not know exactly. However, if she's having this dilemma, then that means her boyfriend is also dear to her. Therefore, which side is the love? Or is it on both sides? I do not know. But I do know is that this concludes the fact that she does have feelings for her boyfriend.

"I—"

I was about to speak, but I paused myself, forcing me to stop with whatever it was that I was going to say. When I was about to speak, I suddenly remembered Erith. Based on her behavior and what she had told me when I was Alvelyn and when I was Alevian, I can tell what she is yearning for. She is acquainted with both Luna and her boyfriend, and might actually be a close friend to both. So, she must want things to remain the same. That's why she targets me. I am the foreign invader in that relationship and she sees it as her role to protect that relationship from me. That's what she's after. So, how do I find a solution, a way that everybody can be happy?

"Do you love your boyfriend?" I asked her in a calm voice after taking a deep breath.

Luna nodded her head in a troubled manner. "I think I do. I don't know if it can still be considered love if I'm constantly thinking about someone else."

"How did you get to know this other person?"

"...He was with me when I was ill," Luna answered. "He provided me with comfort and aid. It was in large part due to him that I was able to make it through. In my dreams, when I would occasionally dream of what if I was never cured, it was him that is there and not my boyfriend."

"Hmm..." I paused as I formulated a solution in my mind.

I don't know who this person Luna is talking about, but...sadly, I will have to sacrifice him. It is a necessary sacrifice so that more people could be happy.

"Are you sure that it's not just gratitude?" I glanced over at her from the corner of my eye.

What I had said seemed to have attracted Luna's attention as she looked over at me with her eyes fixed on me.

"When someone helped you out when you're in difficult times," I continued. "It's only natural for you to keep them in your mind. But..." I paused and took a deep breath. "don't let that gratitude be confused with love. They are similar in the feelings that they cause, but they're different. One fades away given time, and the other is everlasting."

"..." Luna remained silent so I looked over at her. "Is that so..."

On her face was a relieved smile. She seemed to have made a decision, but I am unsure as to how much my words had affected it. However, whatever the case maybe, she seemed to be in a better mood now.

"Thank you, Alevian," she smiled as she rose to her full height. "I'm feeling better now. If you say that it's simply just a misconception from gratitude, then it must be that."

"I don't know though," I said as I got up. "I don't have any experience on this—"

"No," She interrupted me. "You're right...Cause you said it yourself."

She looked over at me, smiling one last time in that reminiscing and sad manner. Her eyes were bright as they seemed to be finally rid of the clouds that had obscured them. She had made her decision, so that is why. There is no more of that might cause her to have a dilemma. My words made her realize, maybe, that her attraction towards whoever she was thinking of to be a sense of gratitude that will eventually fade away with time.

I do not know the exact consequences of my actions, but I believe it is for the best. It will make the most people happy, with the only person being sacrificed being whoever she was thinking of. I do feel quite sorry to that person since I might've just killed his chance at a relationship, but whatever. I do not know who she is talking about, and since it's not me, there's not much I would worry about. This faint feeling of guilt I am feeling right now...it'll go away sooner or later.

"The others should be back now," Luna said as she gazed at the setting sun once again, bringing up a hand to the left side of her face to keep her hair out of her eyes as they fluttered and danced elegantly in the wind. "We should head back."

"Right," I muttered as I watched her determined back standing with her back straight and gazing out at the sun.

Even though I believe I made the right decision, there's still a faint feeling of worry in my mind. But whatever that feeling maybe, it'll die off sooner or later.