Chapter 4: Time to Divorce Him

Shen Zhichu was dragging her feet as she made her way back. What should have been a ten-minute walk stretched into twenty. The villa was as cold as a morgue; the heating was off and the vast rooms were freezing.

She kicked off her heels and stumbled into the bathroom like she was drunk. She turned on the hot water in the bathtub and filled it halfway. One moment she was holding on, and the next she collapsed into the tub like a ragdoll. The hot water spread around her silent, motionless body. Her long, red dress spread out in the water, looking like a pool of blood, making her face as pale as sheet.

She closed her eyes and let her face sink into the water. The water covered her head, muffling all her senses. The brief suffocation numbed her heart. Suddenly, she couldn't hold back and gasped, hot water rushing into her mouth, and a wave of nausea hit her like a freight train.

Shen Zhichu's eyes, bloodshot, emerged from the water. She was sprawled over the edge of the tub, her body limp. Her stomach felt like it was being torn apart. She opened her mouth numbly, her upper body convulsing uncontrollably. She hadn't eaten all day, and all that came out was acidic bile, burning her throat. Tears streamed down her face.

At last, she looked at the mix of blood and mucus on the floor, and the corners of her mouth twisted into a bitter smile that didn't reach her eyes. Her gaze was hollow and desolate.

She took off her red dress and used it to wipe the blood off the floor. She couldn't let Li Jingshen see the blood.

Outside, the sky was growing dark. Shen Zhichu, barefoot, stumbled back to her bedroom and face-planted onto the bed. She couldn't sleep. She used to have hope for the future despite her illness, but now, no matter how hard she fought, it felt like a losing battle.

Four years. She'd given everything in these four years, from being head over heels to now drowning in despair.

It felt like she'd cried a lifetime's worth of tears that day. Shen Zhichu put her hand over her heart and thought bitterly, "My stomach's the one that's messed up, why the hell does my heart hurt?"

Her phone, in her bag, suddenly buzzed. She bolted upright and rummaged through her bag like a madwoman. When she saw the caller ID, her strength drained away.

It's not him… Shen Zhichu, what were you hoping for?

She stared blankly at her phone for a couple of seconds before finally swiping to answer.

"Qin Mo," her voice was raspy, like a knife scraping against a whetstone.

Qin Mo was her childhood friend, practically family. They grew up together. To Shen Zhichu, he was like a brother.

On the phone, Qin Mo sounded worried. "Zhichu, what's up with your voice? Are you sick?"

"Just a cold. Woke up with a sore throat…"

She didn't get to finish. Qin Mo cut her off, "Zhichu, are you trying to lie to me too? Did you forget I'm a doctor? I can tell the difference between a cold and a cried-out voice."

She felt like she had a lump in her throat, sharp as a rock, making it bleed. She couldn't say a word, and finally let out a bitter laugh.

Qin Mo asked, "Can you tell me why you were crying?"

Shen Zhichu clutched her phone and stared at the wooden floor. No one likes to show their vulnerable side. She shook her head, "Nope, can't do."

Qin Mo paused. He knew Shen Zhichu was stubborn as a mule. If she didn't want to spill the beans, you couldn't pry it out of her even with a crowbar.

He changed the subject, "What did the doctor say about your test results today?"

Shen Zhichu pressed her lips together, "All good."

Qin Mo retorted, "If you don't wanna talk, fine. But I can check your results myself at the hospital."

He was a big shot surgeon there, so getting her medical records would be a piece of cake.

Crap...

"It's either you tell me, or I find out myself. Your call," he pressed her.

The line went silent, so quiet she could hear his breathing. Shen Zhichu caved, "Cancer. Late-stage stomach cancer."

Qin Mo was speechless.

She could hear him trying to hold back something, his breathing erratic.

"How can this be... you're so young…" he muttered, his voice breaking.

Even through the phone, Shen Zhichu could feel his sadness. He was grieving for her. To have someone care before she kicked the bucket, that was enough for her.

"Come to the hospital. I'll run the tests again," he urged.

Shen Zhichu refused, "It won't change a thing, Qin Mo. I know my own body. Maybe it's karma…"

"What are you talking about? Zhichu, listen to me. Get treatment. You can beat this…" Qin Mo's voice was heavy with sorrow. He was a specialist in this field; he knew how serious and painful this disease could be.

How did Shen Zhichu let herself get this way?

Qin Mo didn't know what to say. Sometimes it wasn't about wanting to live, but whether fate would allow it. Her time was running out. The hospital suggested either long-term treatment or giving up. Either way… the end was near.

"Zhichu, you need to divorce Li Jingshen. Look at what he's done to you in these four years," he blurted out.

Divorce… The thought had never crossed Shen Zhichu's mind. To her, Li Jingshen was her everything, the light she desperately wanted to hold on to. But how can you hold light?

She gripped her phone so hard her knuckles turned white. She mustered all her strength, "I'll think about it."

Divorcing Li Jingshen felt like tearing a piece of her own heart out. Easier said than done.

Qin Mo urged her to go to the hospital again the next day. She agreed, but didn't take it to heart.

Besides being Li Jingshen's wife, she was also the CEO of Shen Corporation. She had a ton on her plate.

People's endurance is like a camel's back; it can carry a heavy load, but the straw that breaks the camel's back can be as light as a feather.

After hanging up, Shen Zhichu tossed her phone on the nightstand. Her stomach was killing her, and sleep seemed impossible. She opened the drawer and took out two bottles of pills - one for pain and one for sleep. She popped a couple of each and collapsed on the bed.

Maybe the pills kicked in because her brain started to get foggy. She was having nightmares, feeling like a ghost was pressing down on her chest. She couldn't breathe. When she finally woke up, she realized it wasn't a ghost - it was Li Jingshen.