22 Chapter 3
As Zoro was sweating from Markus staring at him, Luffy sat up groggily, "What am I doing outside? ... I'm too sleepy."
Luffy lay back down and passed out once again. Zoro and Markus tossed bodies off of the roof and collected a bottle of liquor. They sat down together and passed the bottle back and forth. As they quietly enjoyed the booze and the night sky together, a muffled explosion sounded from a distance away. The two of them looked over while Zoro asked, "You hear that too?"
Markus nodded, "We've got some guests."
Zoro and Markus made their way over to where Luffy and the Baroque Works people were. Two new members had appeared. The two of them stood on the roof, still sharing the bottle, while listening to the conversation going on below them. The two new people were Mr. 5 and Ms. Valentine. The two new arrivals clearly didn't have much respect for the other members that Zoro had beaten up. When questioned about being backup, they just laughed at the others and denied them. It turned out they were here looking for a pair of traitors. Two people who had found out about their bosses big secret. Markus knew what they meant by that, Crocodile, the Shichibukai, was the head of Baroque Works.
Mr. 5 was a tall man with dark skin and dark hair that was made into short deadlocks that stuck up in every direction. He wore dark sunglasses, even at night like a douche, and a long red overcoat. Ms. Valentine was a decent looking woman with blonde hair. She wore an outfit that showed a love of lemons. She wore a hat that looked like a lemon, a sundress covered in lemon slices, and earrings that looked like lemon slices.
Hearing Ms. Valentine laugh was extremely annoying. Mr. 5 started the explanation, "The Boss's direct words were 'My secret has been found out.' Of course, we have no idea what that secret might be but, our organization's motto is 'secrecy.' No one is allowed to pry into the identities of our members."
Ms. Valentine took over, "After investigating into the matter, it seems an agent of a certain kingdom infiltrated into Baroque Works."
Mr. 9 immediately panicked, "W-wait! I know I wear a crown but I'm not really a king! It's just a hobby!"
Ms. Valentine gave Mr. 9 a derisive look, "We know it's not you."
Zoro and Markus looked down on the group and listened in. Zoro wiped a bit of liquor from his lips and muttered, "Not good... Luffy's caught in the open."
Mr. 5 continued where Ms. Valentine left off, "The spy we're talking about, is the Alabasta Kingdom's..."
He didn't get to finish before Igarappoi tugged on the loops to his bowtie and fired his six hair-guns, "DIE!"
His shots seemed to hit Mr. 5 and Ms. Valentine and caused an explosion and a dust cloud. Mr. 9 looked confused by what was happening. Ms. Wednesday screamed, "Igaram!"
Igarappoi, real name Igaram, shouted back at her, "Please run away!"
Ms. Valentine appeared falling from the air above Ms. Wednesday and kicked her on the top of her head before floating away again. As Ms. Wednesday looked at the retreating Ms. Valentine, there was an explosion behind her as Igaram was attacked. Ms. Wednesday turned to look at Igaram and called out his name. From the dust cloud, Mr. 5 appeared and continued where he left off, "The name of the spy is Igaram, the head of Alabasta Kingdom's royal guards! And the second spy..."
Ms. Valentine picked up where he left off while holding a picture of a young woman with long blue hair, "Is none other than Alabasta's princess herself, Nefertari Vivi!"
Everyone nearby was shocked, except for Markus. He just smiled and continued to watch the play while sitting on the roof with his legs dangling down. During the current lull, Zoro hopped off of the roof and dragged Luffy out of the way to keep him safe. Mr. 5 started to pick his nose while he spoke, "Under the direct orders of the boss, We shall hereby eliminate you two!"
Vivi, previously Ms. Wednesday, put on the silly ring weapon of hers and started spinning it while shouting, "DON'T UNDERESTIMATE ME!"
Mr. 9 stepped in front of her while holding one of his bats, "I may not understand what's going on, but you've been my partner for a long time. I'll hold them off so you hurry up and run away Ms. Wednesday!"
Mr. 9 charged at Mr. 5 while Mr. 5 continued to pick his nose until he plucked out a booger. It was disgusting to look at. As Mr. 9 charged closer, Mr. 5 curled his fingers like he was going to flick them with the fresh booger as ammo to be fired, "Nose Fancy..." he waited for Mr. 9 to get closer, "CANNON!"
Mr. 5 flicked the booger at Mr. 9, as soon as it hit Mr. 9 it exploded violently and sent Mr. 9 flying through the air. While Zoro and the others gawked, Markus frowned. Mr. 5 had a decent Devil Fruit, something like the Bomu Bomu no Mi. Honestly, it was a pretty interesting Devil Fruit and Markus found it tempting to knock Mr. 5 out and steal it. The thought was only fleeting though. The Bomu Bomu no Mi had one big flaw to it, it could only detonate parts of the user's body. So while unlimited invisible exploding ammo for his guns was tempting, it wasn't nearly as tempting as the Goro Goro no Mi.
He turned his attention from Mr. 5 to Ms. Valentine. She took had an interesting Devil Fruit, the Kilo Kilo no Mi. It could do some pretty interesting things that flew in the face of physics. However, it too had a flaw. It could only increase the weight of the user to 10,000 kilograms and was completely outclassed by the Ton Ton no Mi by exactly 1,000 times. He had zero temptation to take that fruit from her. The people working for Crocodile in Baroque Works had some interesting Devil Fruits but all of them were completely outclassed by the potential of the Goro Goro no Mi. Even Crocodiles own Suna Suna no Mi.
During the commotion, Vivi fled on Carue while Igaram grabbed Zoro's leg and begged him to help save princess Vivi. At the mention of a reward, Nami seemed to appear from nowhere, "A great reward you say? Alright then! How about a billion Belly's?"
Igaram was so shocked he couldn't speak straight and had to repeatedly use his 'Ma-ma-maaa~' voice exercise to clear his voice. Zoro looked at Nami, "Weren't you passed out from drinking?"
Markus appeared next to Nami and answered for her, "As if she would be caught unaware in such a suspicious place."
Nami grinned at Markus and added, "I was just pretending to be drunk. I could have drunk a lot more if I wanted." She turned to look at Igaram, "So how about it? Can you promise us our reward? Don't forget, without our help your precious princess might die you know."
Markus smirked as he watched Nami dig for money. It was funny when it was happening to someone other than the crew. Igaram finally managed to speak, "I-I'm afraid I can't promise such an astronomical sum. I'm merely a single soldier!"
Nami didn't let up, "Oh? Are you saying that your precious princess isn't worth a billion Belly's?" She leaned closer to the panicking Igaram, "Pay up."
Zoro muttered, "Talk about extortion."
Markus whispered, "Just let her work, man. It's like watching a master performing."
Igaram got a bright idea as he said, "In that case, I'm sure if you return the princess safely to our lands you could directly negotiate with her!"
"So basically, you're telling us to save her first?"
Igaram couldn't take it anymore, "This is no time to negotiate! Even no Princess Vivi's life is in danger!"
Nami sighed, "Fine, Fine. We'll save the precious little princess first." She lifted her arm and pointed in the direction Vivi and Carue had run, "Markus, Zoro, GO!"
Zoro couldn't take it and yelled, "Why should I go?! Why do we have to help you with your money-making schemes?!"
Zoro and Nami started to get into an argument, but Markus had already vanished from sight. With the ability to permanently keep his footwork going, he could always move at 430% speed. That gave him an Agility of 583 when moving while using it. It was insane. Everything was a blur to him while he was using it so he had to move in straight lines if he wasn't using his Observation Haki at the same time.
Within moments he caught up to Vivi, Mr. 5, and Ms. Valentine. He arrived and stuck in the back for a bit to see what was happening. Ms. Monday, the large dark-skinned woman Zoro beat in strength, appeared with a large log to block Mr. 5 and Ms. Valentine. Vivi took the opportunity to run, but Mr. 5 took Ms. Monday out with an exploding clothesline. Markus decided now was a good time to interfere. He practically teleported behind Ms. Valentine with his fist cocked back and coated in black Armament Haki. Without caring about her sex in the least, he slammed his fist into the back of her head. There was a loud crack as he hit her and knocked her to the ground out cold.
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You have defeated Mikita, +1,000 experience.
Mikita (Ms. Valentine)
Class: Baroque Works Bounty Hunter
Level: 26
Hit Points: 206/550
Unconscious
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Markus smirked at the shocked looks on the faces of Mr. 5 and Vivi. To them, Markus had appeared out of nowhere and knocked Ms. Valentine out with a single blow. Markus wasn't too surprised. When using his Armament Haki his melee damage transformed from decent to monstrous. He'd roughly calculated that his average damage barehanded with Armament Haki was around 300. Ms. Valentine was pathetically weak and clearly over-relied on her Devil Fruit for her strength. He turned to look at Mr. 5 while cracking his knuckles and grinning.
Mr. Five immediately started to pick his nose but Markus vanished from sight once again. A split second later another loud crack echoed out as Markus appeared behind Mr. 5 and punched him in the head. His Image Training had taught Markus that head blows of sufficient strength were more likely to knock his targets unconscious.
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You have defeated Gem of the Boarder, +2,100 experience.
Gem of the Border (Mr. 5)
Class: Baroque Works Bounty Hunter
Level: 28
Hit Points: 92/620
Unconscious
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Seeing the damage he'd done, Markus grimaced. Too close! The damage meant it was a critical hit, if that critical hit had been any stronger he might have outright killed Mr. 5 in a single blow. He wasn't sure if Mr. 5 was important or not so he didn't want to risk killing him. When he turned to look at Vivi, she grit her teeth and started to spin her weapon while muttering to herself, "He took out Mr. 5... in one blow. I can't let him stop me here..."
As she hesitated on attacking Markus, Zoro appeared and sliced the string on her silly weapon. He gave her a flat look, "Calm down, we've come to save you."
Before they could talk more, a still fat and now angry Luffy showed up, "ZOROOOOOOOO!"
Zoro looked at Luffy and smiled, "What is it? If you've come to help, we don't need it. Or did that woman send you too?"
Luffy exploded, "I'll never forgive you! FIGHT ME!"
Zoro shouted back, "What kind of idiotic thing are you spouting now?!"
Luffy screamed back, "Shut up! An ungrateful bastard like you needs and ass beating!"
Zoro looked totally confused, "Ungrateful?"
"That's right! I can't ever forgive you... How dare you cut up every single one of these townspeople!! After they fed us such yummy food!!"
Zoro twitched, "Ah... well... I did cut them up but..."
Before he could finish trying to explain, a fat enraged Luffy came charging at him and threw a punch. Zoro dodged it just before it hit him. Luffy smashed the wall of a building behind Zoro. Markus snickered as he watched the two get into a fight. He did nothing to stop it and just enjoyed the show while standing close to Vivi. She looked dumbfounded, "How thick can someone be?"
Markus looked at her, "Our captain is a moron, but he's a good guy. He thinks one of his crew attacked innocent people so now he's trying to punish that crewmember."
As the fight between Zoro and Luffy progressed, Luffy finally slimmed back down to his normal size. Some people in his past world had thought that Luffy had a limited form of Seimei Kikan due to scenes like this where he rapidly digested large quantities of food. The two immediately continued their fight. Markus watched curiously as this was the first fight among crewmembers. He could only remember two ever happening. Most of the time the crew got along quite well. As their fight continued and got more violent, Vivi looked around, "This should be a good time to get away."
Markus called out to her, "Stay put, you wouldn't want to get between them. I'm not even sure I would survive."
Just as their fight was getting more violent, Nami appeared and decked both of them hard enough to knock them to the ground. Markus flinched and secretly wondered if Nami was actually the strongest on the crew. Maybe she had a special anger-related skill? Nami looked at the two downed men, "Just what the hell were you two doing?" She looked over at Vivi and Markus, then back to Zoro and Luffy, "Well at least the princess is safe." She reached down and grabbed Zoro and Luffy by their collars, "BUT YOU TWO ALMOST COST ME 1 BILLION BELLY'S! Do you understand?!"
Vivi looked completely lost as she sat on Carue, "What are you talking about? Why did you people save me?"
Nami continued to hold Zoro and Luffy while she smiled at Vivi, "Ah that's right, you don't know yet. Would you like to make a contract with me?"
As Nami was talking, Luffy and Zoro started a small brawl with each other. Vivi looked confused at Nami, "Contract?"
Nami clocked Luffy and Zoro on their heads again, "KNOCK IT OFF!"
With Nami keeping Luffy and Zoro in check, Luffy finally understood what was going on and laughed it off. With things calmed down and all the Baroque Works people out cold, Vivi started explaining the situation. She told them all about the situation in her country, the revolutionaries, the growing chance of a civil war, and how Baroque Works was behind it. She talked about how she joined Baroque Works to infiltrate them and find out the truth. Baroque Works intended to take over her home country of Alabasta and found a new nation in its place. As she finished explaining the situation, Nami nodded in understanding, "No wonder you refused. A country in the middle of civil strife wouldn't have any money to spare."
Luffy, ever clueless, spoke up, "So who is the boss dude anyway?"
Vivi panicked and waved her hands, "Please don't ask me that! You're better off not knowing! If you knew Baroque Works would hunt you down wherever you went!"
Nami chuckled nervously, "Yeah, just leave us out of it. A guy planning to take over an entire country must be one terrifying individual!"
Vivi nodded her head in vehement agreement, "Exactly! No matter how strong of a pirate you might be you're no match for Crocodile, a member of the Shichibukai!"
Everyone's jaws dropped while Zoro muttered, "Did you just say his name?"
As they were freaking out, they happened to notice an otter and a buzzard perched on the building nearby. When everyone saw the pair, the otter hopped on to the buzzard and flew off. Nami immediately began to freak out. She grabbed Vivi by the collar and started shaking her, "What was that bird and otter just now?! Did they go to report that you told us the boss's secret?! What's gonna happen to us now?!"
Luffy and Zoro seemed interested in the Shichibukai while Markus just chuckled to himself and watched the two creatures fly away. He could have stopped them but they were needed as additional motivation for the crew to help Vivi and save Alabasta. Nami was freaking out because of the trouble this would bring them. Luffy and Zoro didn't seem to mind. Luffy smiled as he said, "We're really lucky to meet him so early."
Zoro added, "I wonder what kind of guy he is."
"SHUT UP YOU TWO!" Nami screamed.
Nami spun on her heels and started walking away, "It's been a real short time traveling with you guys but bye!"
Luffy turned to watch her, "Where ya going Nami?"
"They don't know my face yet so I'm running away!"
As she was walking away she saw the otter standing in the middle of the road with a drawing pad and pencil in hand. It was drawing quickly and when it finished it turned to show the four drawings to Nami. it had expertly drawn the faces of her, Luffy, Zoro, and Markus. Nami gave a little applause, "Wow, you're good!"
As the otter and buzzard flew away, Nami stomped back over to the group shouting, "Now I can't even run away!"
Nami was depressed and staring at a wall while Vivi tried to comfort her. Luffy, Zoro, and Markus were grinning at the thought of a good fight. As everyone was chatting, Igaram appeared, "Fear not! It'll be alright! I have a plan!"
When everyone looked at him they were surprised. He'd dressed up like Vivi, though he looked nothing like her at all. It was just plain disturbing! He carried four off-looking stuffed sacks with roughly human shapes to them. Igaram explained that Baroque Works wouldn't let them go and would hunt them down. He even explained that Crocodile used to have an 80 million Belly bounty on his head. Once he finished, he looked at them, "By the way, have you decided whether or not to escort the princess back to Alabasta yet?"
Luffy, unaware of what happened previously asked, "What're you talking about?"
Zoro explained, "He means he wants us to take her back home."
"Oh! Sure!"
Nami couldn't take it and screamed, "80 Million?! That's four times Arlong's bounty! Just refuse him!"
No one paid her any attention. Igaram turned to Vivi, "Please hand me the Eternal Pose to Alabasta."
With Nami asking what an Eternal Pose was. Igaram explained that an Eternal Pose was a kind of Log Pose that permanently stored a single destination. It could be used to find the island it had logged from anywhere in the Grand Line. After he explained what the log pose was, he explained his plan. He would take the Eternal Pose and head toward Alabasta with the four dummies to act as a distraction.
Everyone moved to the shore where a ship was docked. Igaram took the time to say goodbye to Vivi, "The journey ahead may be dangerous, please be careful."
Vivi shook hands with Igaram, "You too."
Igaram boarded the boat and left. Everyone watched for a bit to see him off. Luffy really liked the weird Igaram. As the group turned to leave, a massive explosion went off and covered the sea in roaring flames.
