4 Beginning Years - Part 4

Recently, I haven't been able to find any monsters to fight or any food to hunt. I already know the answer, I just don't want to accept it. Everything senses that death is everywhere I go, this isn't because of anything simple like I fought too many monsters and my aura has already developed. It's because of the intervention from the Goddess of Death, Satana. Since then everything runs away from me the second I get within a few hundred feet from them, while I am thankful for her help in maturing my divine blood to an even greater degree, this is just terrible! I'll starve at this rate, not that I really could, but I won't be able to practice fighting against any monsters or hunting.

Now here's my solution, hide away and train to both mature my abilities and my ability to control the aura she gave me. Finding a good tree to live in isn't that hard, the real problem is locals. For the most part I've been avoiding the places that people are known to gather, but with this, it might not be that I find them but that they find me. AHHHH! What a problem this is, at this rate I might be called an evil spirit and be purged from the forest. Of course if I wanted to, they wouldn't be able to do that and I could just kill all of them. Buttt since receiving the blessing from Satana, she's been coming to visit sometimes. One of the first things she told me was that senseless killing was not allowed and she would immediately take away my life if I did. So when she visited last time, I simply asked her if she could do something about having peace and quiet for my training. She snapped her fingers and just like that we were in an expanse of darkness. After that said we have two weeks to train, saying that she put me inside her own personal dimension. This experience was extremely delightful for my young brain, why? I was walking on air, in other words there was no gravity.

Now here I am stuck in the personal dimension of someone that is thought to control death. Realizing that she said the word 'we' I immediately asked "Wait so are you gonna be staying here with me while I train?"

"Well of course, I put you into this predicament, besides you're actually my only truly faithful servants these days. I ought to cherish you at the very least." Seeing my face showing obvious confusion she elaborated.

"Ah, well anyone that knows of me now, thinks that I can kill them just thinking about it. There are two problems, the first is that I can't actually do that, although it would be easy to kill anyone. The other problem being that since I can understand someone's thoughts on the surface level, I know that they really don't worship or pray because they love me, it's because they fear for their lives. You and your mother were some of the only people in the universe that want to give back to me not out of fear but the kindness of your hearts and care for me on a deep level that I can't even understand. Now that your mother is actually gone from this world you're the only one there for me."

I never thought that the Goddess of Death, no, Satana would ever care for her followers, let alone show such emotion, but it seems I was mistaken. Yet that actually brought a question to my head "If we're your only followers that worship you because of you, why didn't you save 'her'?"

After contemplating for a moment she began "Well you and 'her' are unique, in that you're both of a rare species. This being the case I actually thought you would be able to handle anything on your own. You being a divine and 'herself' being a species known for their craftiness in a forest. By the time I knew of you being under attack it was too late, instead I placed a curse of death on the individuals that did that to 'her' ensuring that a painful death will surely fall upon them someday. Any other questions, young Aethrea?"

"This is my last question, I promise. Could you allow me to fulfill the death curse?"

"Hmmmm, sure. Whenever you leave the forest of lythania pray to me that success will come, then I will direct you to where they currently are. My only condition is that you cannot leave the forest until you are twelve, understand?"

My face brightened up immediately, now knowing that I'd even have the help of a God to complete what I promised to myself a year ago. "Yes, Lady Satana!"

"Good, now let's begin the training. First I would like for you to hold out your hands." Doing what she asked for without hesitation. She placed her hands on mine, seeing my childish blush, she smiled at me. Immediately it made my heart feel at peace instead of beating harder. As I saw her close her eyes, feeling like I should do that as well, I began closing my eyes. She began, "First find the core of your spirit."

"What do you mean?"

"Look deep within yourself, first you must find the core of you. Tell me when you have found it."

Not understanding what she was talking about I was just about to ask her, but I decided against it. If I couldn't do something so simple for her how will I ever return the favor she has given me. I began meditating, after a few hours of darkness inside my mind, 'he' appeared. 'He' was simply a small human silhouette, showered in black and white that made him seem almost like a dalmation. "Who are you?" my voice showered in confusion and fear. "I am you, the person who isn't a person." 'he' said in a monotone voice. I was about to tell Lady Satana that I found myself until 'he' said those last words. "What do you mean by that?" The voice began like last time "I am you, the person who doesn't have a place in the world. The one who found himself without even parents to protect him. The one abandoned by the rest of the world without even a thought passing their minds about him." Immediately firing back "What about Lady Satana, she gave me all these different things, how come you don't believe she cares?" The voice stopped for a moment before starting "I am you, she is one that doesn't belong in this world either." "How come she doesn't belong here either, just because someone lives somewhere else or is powerful doesn't mean they don't belong! Besides why do you keep starting your sentences with 'I am you'?" "I am you, she is also outcast by the world. Without her power no one would even give a care in the world about her. Don't resist the words I tell you, accept them as though they are you. Would you like to find your spirit core?" Huh, how did he know that? "I am you, therefore I know what you are thinking." "If that's true, what am I thinking about right now?" "I am you, you would like to marry Lady Satana one day." My face immediately flushed red, "Ah, well it seems like you know a thing or two about me. Fine then, I'll trust you for now. Where is my spirit core?" "I am you, we are inside it. To complete the process of aura dissipation you need to experience hell. Would you like to do that?" "Of course, I can't go anywhere with this deathly aura." "I am you, meditate inside here and focus on taking all the energy from the world into you. Similar to how you use your divine abilities."

I sat down on the nothingness we were in and began, it didn't take too long before the world I was currently living in to become clouded with darkness and pain. However there was some light to the darkness as well. A light that screamed it wanted to illuminate the dark world. The world became too dark, all at once I felt as though I was about to die. My body seemed like it was on fire, there were needles stabbing me both in and out of my body, and the energy left me. As I layed there on the floor 'he' began speaking again, "I am you, you are a fool. Do you understand the being that you are now? One that is to take on the sadness of others, one that is to take on the death of others, one that is to burn up in fury." "Even so, I will take it on. The world is too full of things that aren't meant for it, so I will be the one that is outside the world. The one that takes on the things not of this world." "I am you, I now understand why Lady Satana has taken a liking to you. I am you, you are her."