5 What's painful, seems more indulgent

I confessed.

The day when we marked our 5th year of friendship, I had decided to tell you how I felt.

It was a Friday evening, we were supposed to hang out just like we used to. But that day was different.

I was nervous, you were clueless.

When you arrived at my home, we watched movies for a few hours. We ate, we talked, and we looked at each other.

I remember closing my eyes, inhaling deeply, preparing to tell you the words I wanted to say.

I confessed.

You were unfazed.

"Sorry, Y/N. I don't feel the same way."

Those words hurt.

It hurt me, it still hurts me.

But I couldn't stop loving you, even though it's becoming painful.

Loving you is my only indulgence.