What Am I?

Kaeden's head was pounding. There was so much noise. The lights were bright against his closed eyelids. His guts churned as the stench of sweat and sewage filled his nostrils. He retched. He tried to open his eyes, but they refused to open. A hand gripped his arm and everything stilled, save a single heartbeat. Kaeden tipped his head to the side.

The heartbeat was calm, relaxed. Very different compared to the cacophony that had surrounded him. Where was he? Who's hand was on his arm? Kaeden took the hand in his own. His other hand sliding down the arm. He touched an elbow before the hand pulled in his, drawing him to follow. He took a step. Then another. Whose was the heartbeat? Why was it calm? What allowed him to instinctively trust the hand that was leading him somewhere?

He took his next steps a little more willingly. The tension in the arm relaxed a little. He continued to follow until the air changed around him. He stopped. The heartbeat was still calm, but it was not accompanied by a smell. A smell he couldn't identify. The arm tensed more drawing him to take another step.

Kaeden took that step a little less willingly. The arm continued to gently pull. His steps remained hesitant. He didn't follow them long before the pull became a nudge. The backs of his legs bumped something and he sat. A second hand rested on the back of his neck. The tension in the fingers increased slightly and he turned before laying down.

He turned his head in the direction the person should have been. He reached out. The hand that had touched his neck now held his hand. His eyes opened. Everything was dark, but he knew where the person was. He could hear them breathe. Each breath was slow and deep. Kaeden mimicked the breathing.

"Good, you're relaxed," the woman said.

Kaeden opened his mouth.

"Don't try to speak. Do you know your name?"

He nodded.

"Do you know where you are?"

He shook his head.

"Do you remember what you are?"

Kaeden furrowed his brow. He released the hand and felt his body. No nipples. No belly button. Penis, but no scrotum. Everything else seemed normal for a Human being. He rolled over and reached for her. No hair on her head. He felt his own bald head. No breasts. No belly button. Her hands stopped his before he could touch further. He tried to ask the question rolling through his head, but only managed to bark. A yap and howl soon followed.

"Take a breath." the woman said.

Kaeden took a short one.

"Good. Another. A little deeper this time."

He took another breath.

"Keep breathing."

He moaned/whined with his next exhale.

"You're going well. Keep breathing."

"What is wrong with me?" Kaeden could finally ask.

"You're coming into your power."

"My power?" Kaeden looked at the woman.

He could see her face clearly now. Her face was pale. Her eyes black. Her nose flat and her lips thin. She had no ears that he could see, despite her hearing him. "What…?" He squawked.

"The power to be whatever you wish."

"I…." The rest of his words were lost in a gamete of animal sounds.

"Breathe. Still your mind," she reminded gently. "Feel."

Kaeden shook his head. He rolled over so his back was to her. She stroked his head and he felt his body change. His limbs shortened. He grew a tail. His ears felt stiff. She no longer touched skin, but fur. He growled.

She stopped touching him. She said nothing more, but he could hear her heartbeat soften with distance. He curled up in a ball and tried to rest. Different smells kept entering his nose. It was distracting. Kaeden covered his muzzle with his legs and paws to try and stop the scents. He didn't like this at all.

Power? Or some lab experiment? He tried to recall where he had been, what he had been, before arriving here. He had to have had a past. Or did he? His mind was drawn back to the absence of a belly button. If he was Human, why didn't he have one?

He must have slept because sunlight and the fluttering of wings woke him. A raven sat perched on the head board of the bed. He was still a dog. The raven creed and he felt part of his body shift. He flapped his wings, flailing on the bed while wagging his tail. The raven hopped off the headboard, landing on the bed as a dog.

His floundering stopped as he reverted back into a dog. He made it to his feet and jumped off the bed. His feet slid some as he landed on smooth pavement. He righted himself. He turned to the other dog, just to see the woman that had brought him here. He barked and growled.

"Oh, hush," she said. "You can stop being a dog anytime you like. You just need to focus on what it is you want to be."

Kaeden thought about the form he had last night and felt his body change. He looked himself over, but the moment he checked for a tail, he turned into a dog again. He growled.

"That's all you," the woman said. "You control your focus. You control your form. You lose focus and you change into… whatever."

She rolled to the floor then slithered toward him. He panicked and ran, unaware of his mouse form. She caught him in her mouth. Then she dropped him. He arched his back hissing and spitting at the woman now crouched next to him.

"You adapt quickly. That's good, but only for as long as you can maintain that control."

He paused and felt his body shift. It felt very disproportionate.

"Just like that. Elephant, man, cow, h…."

He shifted again and mooed.

She laughed.

Kaeden stood on his hind legs and roared. He dropped to all fours and ran at her, but she leaped into the air and flew her sparrow self into the rafters. She was out of sight, but he could hear her. He dropped to his hind quarters and hung his head. Very consciously he breathed. He felt his form shift, but he continued to breathe. He consciously shifted his form again then ran out of the warehouse the woman had brought him to.

He knew where he wanted to go, but kept his focus on the movement of his body. Kaeden ran until he was winded, but didn't stop. He walked until he reached a stream. He drank from it, swam across it. He shook off then followed the water deeper into the mountains. He entered the dog door of his cabin. He shifted to his deformed Human self. He pulled clothes on. He raided the cupboards for food. He binged on a bag of jerky. Then he lay on his cot to sleep.

His sleep was interrupted by a loud whine and scratching at the door. He shifted. His clothes fell off. He snorted then turned Human again. He ignored the whining, scratching, and barking while he pulled his clothes back on. He stepped on a plate that unlocked the dog door. There was a plate outside too. He'd trained his dog to use it. Where was his dog? The dog outside kept barking.

"Get in here!" he commanded.

The door swung open slightly before a cowering dog wiggled its way into the cabin. Kaeden released the plate and walked to the cupboards. He filled a bowl with kibble and set it on the floor. Then he returned to his cot. The dog whined.

"Eat or go hungry," he growled.

The dog ate and wasn't quiet about it either. Kaeden lay with his eyes closed. When the dog was done crunching away, she climbed up onto the cot. She circled and circled before finally settling against his chest.

"Any particular reason you followed me?" he asked.

She whined and tried to snuggle.

"Stop it."

She growled then yapped.

"What?!"

The woman shifted to a more human-like form. "How are you maintaining your form? You couldn't several hours ago."

"Doesn't matter."

"It does, too, matter. You won't be able to stay here the rest of your life."

"Watch me." He rolled over and tried to sleep again.

"Dog. Cat. Hawk. Cow. Be…."

"Stop talking. It's annoying."

"But…."

"I said enough."

The woman was silent and he fell asleep.