27 Chapter 8: Act II: Prologue part 3
Let me prelude my projects with a simple question.
If you had the power to add any flavor text to a Crafted Item with the knowledge that it may one day become real, what would you do?
…
…
…
Yeah, it's harder than it sounds, isn't it? At that point you could make an Item that summons the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man for shits and giggles or, I don't know, one that creates an enslaved Esdeath for your enjoyment.
But when you stop and think about it… that wouldn't make sense, would it? Where would the ability come from to summon something like that? In YGGDRASIL that kind of power would either take Mana or require you to use Data in your weapon to hold that sort of functionality. But if you just add that flavor text to a feather and expect it to summon a marshmallow man, you'll probably end up gesturing vaguely at the sky and wondering when he's going to show up.
So instead of trying our luck at making ourselves God-Emperor of the Heavens with a few lines of text, let's assume there are some restrictions, seeing as even Magic has its limits. The Items don't miraculously become game-breaking wonders capable of fathomless power when you add extra fluff to them. They still operate under the game's explicit rules, after all, and you can't just wave your hand and say 'BECAUSE IT WORKS!'. These Items are Magic, not World Items.
With all this in mind, I sat down and made a list of limits for myself to follow while making the Items.
First restriction—the Item's flavor text has to describe a mechanic that could feasibly be added to the game. I can't make a scarf and say 'it gives the wearer the power to kill anyone they want instantly', since the game forbids truly instant death. Even the highest-Tier Spells take a second or two to activate, and another half second to take effect. I could, however, say that the scarf gives the wearer access to [True Death], a Spell that one would be able to get through normal gameplay if they had the correct Classes.
Second restriction—the Item has to have enough free Data space not used for enchantments or Stat boosters. It has to support the flavor text as if it were added as an extra enchantment. This isn't too hard to get around if you're Crafting the Item yourself, you just have to create an empty Divine-Class Item and stuff it with empty Data Crystals. Presto, instant Item with zero modifications whatsoever.
Third restriction—the flavor text has to apply an effect as if it were an actual enchantment. I know this one sounds redundant considering the other two, but there's good reason. In the game, the better the enchantments you added, the more specific the requirements were to use the Item. In this case, it's just common sense. Sure, I may be able to just make a sword with the power to 'set everything it hits on fire', but if I didn't then say 'Requires at least one Level in Pyromancer', it might not work. Reality is still a reflection of a video game, after all, and every Magic System has limits.
Fourth restriction—avoid absolutes like the plague. If I gave a weapon 'infinite power', what would that do to reality? If I gave a pair of dice the ability to make 'perfect rolls', would they come up differently? Roll twelves every time? Would they develop a form of intelligence in order to read the situation and react accordingly? Hell, would they become sentient? I long ago decided that I really didn't want to find out.
Of course, any one of these restrictions on text could prove false. I could be wasting my time trying to fit into a box that isn't there. But if I don't add that box, then the possibilities for what I could do were literally infinite.
Don't get me wrong. I still plan on using the next century or so of my life to test exactly what I can and can't do with flavor text. I still have all my Levels in Blacksmith and Weapon Smith, in addition five Levels in a Rare Class I picked up called 'Arcane Smith'. I should be able to edit flavor text just fine so long as I Craft the Item myself.
So, obviously, my first priority is to test the effects of exactly that.
I appeared in my smithy, a hidden area on Floor 7 I had decked out in everything a man might need to forge weapons. Not just the medieval way, either, hell no. I went all-out, buying an advanced Data Pack from the cash shop so I could insert things like belt sanders and lathes. Everything in here was made unbreakable via flavor text, a completely legitimate move due to there being enchantments that allowed the same thing.
I ignored those things for the moment, moving over to a solid metal bin that I had made myself with my Smithing Skill. It looked rather like someone had just welded a few low-Level tower shields together, because honestly that's what had happened. Despite me being able to make custom models of everything from welding torches to turning tables, the ability to make a plain box of metal was apparently something no one ever thought to include in the game. Hence the odd appearance of the box.
The outside didn't matter, though, not in the least. No, what mattered was what it might allow me to do. Namely, I had made it say it 'reset' itself every time the lid closed, drawing on surrounding Mana to refill itself.
I opened the lid, examining the contents for a moment. It was stocked to the brim with bricks of every metal and Prismatic Ore in the game, compacted and fit neatly inside the large cube. I picked up a brick of iron, setting it aside and closing the lid. I waited a moment, then re-opened it. Once more, the sight of a fully stocked bin greeted me, the missing brick once more in place despite the fact that it was currently sitting on a workbench to my left.
I grinned.
Fuck yes. Infinite Items glitch confirmed.
I closed the lid once more, deciding to leave messing with that particular oddity for another day. Instead, my hands reached up to brush the Circlet I had made in anticipation of this very event.
If that had worked, then it stood to reason…
I inhaled, exhaled, then pulled up my Stats screen.
Alchemist (15)
Sage (15)
Blacksmith (15)
Weapon Smith (10)
Item Smith (10)
Armor Smith (10)
Runesmith (10)
Wild Magic Caster (10)
Martial Artist (10)
Arcane Smith (5)
The Ultimate Raid Boss (5)
Savior of Worlds (5)
Purveyor of Eternity (5)
Sentinel of the Fallen World (5)
Soldier of the Wastelands (5)
Etc.
I grinned, silently fist-pumping. It had worked. I was stuck at Level 191 due to the EXP drain from Wild Magic Caster Leveling itself, but that was easily fixed now that I was confident in this world's sway over various Items.
I leaned over to where a large wooden box rested, opening my Storage and plunging a hand into the murky depths. After a while of rummaging, I finally pulled out a single [Mirror of Kalandra]. Then I tugged the Experience Ring off my finger, almost buzzing in anticipation.
In the game, the Mirror could only ever copy the Item itself, but never the metadata. That meant that while I could make copies of the EXP ring, they were entirely empty and entirely useless. The caveat of the Mirror is that Mirrored Items cannot be changed in any way, which is a big fucking problem when your ring's only purpose is to increase a very specific numeric value.
But here…
I placed my ring on the Mirror, watching in fascination as the reflective surface came to life. It crawled over the surface of the ring, paused, then slowly returned to being a flat surface. I extended my finger, and the silver material stretched out to wrap around it. It withdrew a moment later, a perfect replica around my finger. The mirror remained in place, sitting innocently in my hand even though its purpose had been fulfilled.
My eyes widened as I considered the World Item. Did the New World let World Items be reused? No, that wouldn't make sense…
Unless…
'…Oh, damn.'
I reached back to where [Once in a Lifetime] was woven into my warrior's braid. A World Item specifically designed to let one use non-Crafting Items an infinite number of times.
It didn't matter much in the long run considering how many copies of each Item I had stored up in my Storage, but still… damn, Devs. What were you smoking when you let this thing affect other World Items?
I shook my head in bemusement, putting back the Mirror and setting my original ring off to the side. I slid on the Mirrored EXP ring, concentrating for a moment until I found the mental switch to activate it. It began to glow, brighter and brighter, until finally the whole thing dissolved. No notifications assaulted me, much to my surprise. That was one difference, the game never failed to tell you when you raised your Level. Odd.
I cleared my throat. "Show Player Level."
[Ancient One]
Level 256
A long, low whistle escaped me. "That's… that's something." A sudden thought occurred, and I cursed. "Dammit, I really should've thought that one through. My Dragon form is going to be fucking huge."
Unless…
Well.
It was time to test the Skills I had honed to perfection over my years of gaming. I picked up the brick I had removed from the box, heading over to the anvil and equipping my [Crafting Hammer].
In case you're wondering, no, this isn't a Magic Item.
It's a World Item.
Yes, they do exist for Crafting Classes, and no, I did not tell a soul I had one such Item. As for what it does, well, let's just say it deals zero damage whatsoever but gives boosts to Crafting Skills and allows for me to apply absolutely bullshit mods to any Item I make with it.
I placed the iron brick into the lava-powered forge, waited for it to heat, then picked it up with my bare hands to begin the process of forming it into something useful. I decided on a plain ring to begin with, my hands moving of their own accord as my Smithing Skill went to work. Despite having never lifted a hammer in my life, I somehow knew exactly where to strike with the tool to draw the iron out into a bar. I grabbed a chisel to cut off the unneeded iron, tossing the unused section aside for a later project. Then I took the still-hot metal over to the lathe in the corner, boring a hole out in the center.
Job done, I smoothed out the edges with some sandpaper and set it down to admire my work.
Item Creation success!
Name: /~~~~~~/—High-Class Item
Description: /~~~~~~/
I stared at the box for flavor text, wordlessly closing my eyes and taking a deep breath.
Evil cackling could be saved for later. Restrain yourself, Ko.
I began to type, fingers blurring across the keyboard as I filled in the empty box with words. I kept it simple, hoping to test it out as soon as possible.
Ancient One's Ring—High-Class Item
Prevents Skill 'Natural Growth' from calculating past Level 100 while equipped.
Does not cost extra Mana to sustain buff: [Size Down].
Buff: [Size Down] can be stacked as many times as needed.
I slid the ring on, nodding to myself. It was more of a cursed item than anything, really, seeing as it only granted a disadvantage, but I didn't care. It fit snugly, and it would keep me from becoming more of a behemoth. If I ever needed to use my maximum size, I could just take off the ring before transforming.
Just to make sure it was working, I activated a single [Size Down]. My perception altered slightly, everything in the room suddenly taller by comparison. I waited patiently, but there was no drain of power from the Buff.
Perfect. Absolutely perfect.
If anything, this new Crafting system was even more broken than the previous one. And if there was one thing I loved, it was a broken Crafting system.
Satisfied, I turned and left the area, cancelling the Buff. A flash of Magic later, and I was walking into the main portion of Floor 8.
Now that my personal curiosities were out of the way, it was time to examine the rest of Nazarick.
Item one: complete.
Item two: Farms.
"Aureole Omega." I called, stepping out into the Cherry Blossom Sanctuary. "Are you here?"
"Yes, my lord."
I turned, seeing a bowing woman clad in traditional shrine maiden garb. The maid was in charge of the teleportation gates in Nazarick, but more importantly, she was in charge of my next attempt at an experiment.
"Ah, Aureole." I smiled at her. "Rise. No need for formalities, I'm just checking around, seeing if anything is broken. Tell me, are the Farms still working as they should?"
The Farms. An area of Nazarick that didn't technically exist. It wasn't a trick of the flavor text, not really, rather a clever method of using NPCs to do my work for me. I had set every one of them up as simple Level 1 Elves, each dedicated to farming a different section of land that I had flattened for their use. As far as they were concerned, they were farmers that had been tending to their crop all their lives. They knew everything there was to know about their crop, and thanks to the Second-Tier [Grow Plant] Spell that they all knew, they could conceivably beat world records for farming.
One slight problem existed, however.
In YGGDRASIL, you couldn't grow usable materials, only plants that vanished after a while. If you wanted something, you had to get it from a drop or trade with another Player. However, in the New World, 'Farmer' was a Job Class that Enri Emmot and the rest of her village all had.
So I made a decision. A decision to try to give NPCs Classes that they were never intended to have through clever preparation.
"Apologies, my lord, but I'm afraid there's an issue." Aureole reported, straightening. "All the crops we planted before are now missing. The ground is fertile and the dirt is freshly turned, but all we have are chests of seeds and no actual plants are growing."
I nodded sagely, as if I hadn't personally made sure the metal chests in question were set to say 'filled with all seeds needed by the owner when opened'. "I understand. Please, continue."
She nodded. "The animals are just fine, they're spawning naturally in the spots we set for them."
Another simple trick, this time using POP mobs. The other Players found it hilarious when I told them I had set Floor 8 to only spawn various low-Level animals. Some of them even jokingly suggested we build catapults to launch the Primeval Cows and Death Pheasants at our foes. I laughed along, assuring the people who complained that I would change the settings if anyone ever invaded again.
"That's wonderful news, Aureole." I smiled at her. "As long as the crops can be replanted and the livestock can still be slaughtered, Nazarick can survive indefinitely on its own. Thank you, and thank the farmers as well. You all truly are the backbone of Nazarick."
Aureole seemed to glow at the praise, bowing once more. "Thank you very much, my lord. It means a lot to us."
I nodded once, raising my Guild Ring. "Keep up the fantastic work, and be sure to drop off the regular amount off at the kitchens come dinnertime."
Word count 2670
