Chapter 4: 1-3: Make a Wish part 2

I continued my trend, still doing my best to pose as a comfort gamer. I began dabbling in Weapons Creation, my Levels in the Blacksmith Job leading naturally to the rarer Weapon Smith Job. I began to raise my Skill Level, using the many thousands of Crafting Items from killing all the Raid Bosses to churn out countless incredible weapons. I continued grinding, aiming relentlessly for the much-desired max Level. The Level that, according to the Developers, allowed you to change your weapon's programming and lore so long as you had the requisite amount of Levels in the lore-based Sage Class as well.

Momonga soon expressed interest in my goal, realizing that the Guild needed a Guild Weapon to truly be recognized. He helped me complete the many Quests needed to gather more base materials, waited long hours at the forge while I ground my Skill as high as possible. Then, finally, I reached the Job's Level cap. My Skill finally breached the insurmountable barrier that all others had faced, allowing me to finally use the max Level of the basic ability.

This kick-started an entirely new wave of innovation. Every member of the now forty-one strong Guild worked in unison to gather the needed materials for the Guild Weapon I was to create. Husbands spend long nights, using their paid work days to farm Bosses and fighting with their wives over the game they so loved. Momonga led the Guild into a new era of prosperity, with me and Touch Me working in public to cement our position as the number one Guild.

The Guild Base was impenetrable, fortified by the resources I gathered from Bosses. Our Guild Weapon was easily bumping the wall of World-Class, similarly overpowered by my contributions. Our members were full of excitement and wonder, all tied under the banner of Ainz Ooal Gown. So, obviously, their minds turned to the final task needed to become number one.

The NPCs.

This time I didn't stop them, no, in fact I encouraged them. I offered my own time and resources to any who asked for them, using my considerable experience at programming to perfect the little creatures. As the members caught on and production began, I quickly found my role as arbitrator of NPC creation. As the 'senior' programmer, every single one of the Players present consulted me for help in creating their ideal character. To each and every one, I gave a single piece of advice that I had lived by throughout the entire game.

We are the gods of this world. What would you like your world to be?

I preached that if one was going to create an NPC, one should create it as if they were going to live their entire lives beside it. They should care for it as if it were their own child, their own brother or sister, their own lover. I soundly shot down ideas that involved 'funny' character design, calmly pointing out that the character themselves would be quite miserable.

To my eternal amusement, Momonga got halfway through a neo-Nazi character before suddenly realizing, to his horror, that it would drive him absolutely insane to live with such a character. So he went with something else instead, making me cackle with hidden laughter.

After the next few months were over, I found myself living in a Tomb with a tremendous number of surprisingly relatable and kind NPCs that would happily slit the throats of their enemies.

Being God has never been more fun.

Of course… despite all their power, the other Players suffered from one common flaw. They saw themselves as pawns rather than chessmasters. Creators, rather than true Gods. Their flavor text granted them only the ability to create backgrounds, rather than truly create characters. I, on the other hand, acted in full knowledge that every character I made would one day be made real. Every quirk would become a personality trait, every piece of background info becoming an immutable part of who they were. I abused my knowledge to its fullest, changing and remaking them to be perfect for the New World we would one day inhabit together.

From there, it was all simple. With all the EXP I had gathered from the Raid Bosses, it was a simple matter to raise my Maiden to the highest heights. I made her unique, suited to my tastes alone. A hundred NPC levels, or one Level 100 NPC. Completely of my own make and model. I even went to the fullest extent, buying out all the new custom NPC skins that allowed for significantly more control over appearance. I dictated every piece of her, every code, every bit of flavor text.

I armed her with weapons that rivaled the Guild Weapon for sheer power, the flavor text of the weapon alone making it worthy of a God. Even as my Guildmates laughed at me for 'wasting weapons' on my Maiden, I just smiled. They didn't understand. Not really. They never would.

They didn't understand that they were gods, after all.

Tabula blinked, staring at the wall of text before him. "I know people call me a perfectionist… but damn. How much data did the shitty Devs give you to work with?"

I shrugged modestly. "Well, considering I helped them completely revamp the system to compress data in a way that saved them millions every day… I'd say a lot."

He scowled at me. Well, more like I knew him well enough to know he was scowling, but you get the idea. "I hate you sometimes. How the hell did you get close enough to them to get this kind of treatment? You're just a retired programmer!"

I coughed. "Er… you do remember that they once mentioned that I was one of their oldest Players, right?"

He nodded slowly. "Yes?"

"They meant game-wise, not age-wise." I smirked. "I was actually one of their best beta-testers back in the day. Helped them nail down the flight mechanics, figure out flow mechanics for water, solve a shitload of recurring bugs…" I trailed off. "Before I got here this game was more broken than Skyrim, so I'd say I've done quite a bit. They know that I'll keep helping for as long as I'm on here, so they do their best to keep me entertained. Think of me as an… unofficial Developer. They can't actually pay me, but they make up for my time with the occasional favor."

The Brain Eater nodded in grudging acceptance. "…Fine. You're certainly enough of a troll for it. I'm still jealous, though." He went back to peering at the data book in front of him. "But I still don't get it. Why did they add a box for flavor text to them, too? They already have coding. Why bother?"

I smiled, not that he could see it. "See, that was something I suggested as a way to stem complaints, which they're testing out with me. Flavor text doesn't actually do anything, but there's a much higher word limit. You don't have to pay for more data that your NPC never uses in their program, so you can just type their personality in the flavor text and use the rest to actually make them do things. It's mostly meant for role-players like me, an extra bit you can buy from the cash shop in order to pad the Devs' pockets."

"…Fair enough. I'll have to look into it later." He continued to scroll, squinting down at the text. "I don't actually see all that much useful code here. Did you only get more data so you could dictate everything about them?"

I nodded shamelessly. "Yep. The coding is for personality, the flavor text is for history and other fiddly bits. This way I could fit in three times as much information."

"I really hate you sometimes."

"I love you too, buddy."

The alchemist sighed, finishing his perusal. "Well, honestly, it seems like it's a pretty good character. It looks like something straight out of an anime, though."

"It is." I agreed. "It's Archer."

He tilted his head. "…Is this another one of your outdated references?"

I huffed, gesturing to the NPC beside me. She was tall and tan-skinned, contrasting with her long white hair. Her steely grey eyes were hard and unyielding, as were the twin blades in her hands. Her armor was a pitch-black chestplate and chain mail under a deep red overcoat, tied with silver crosses. Beneath her clothes, however, her form was soft and curvy, easily rivalling the hottest supermodels. "Look, Tabula, she's beautiful. If you can't appreciate the beauty of the Heroic Spirit Emiya, then you need to learn to appreciate culture."

He eyed me. "I will never understand your fascination with NPC creation. Your other projects are just as detailed and no less powerful. If you actually cared to make them into battle-bots, they could take a high-Level Player like Herohero-san, easily. But instead you fill them with personality data or background information that makes no sense to have in an NPC. If you want to have a character that works well, don't waste so much space."

Coming from anyone else that would be an insult, but… "Albedo." I countered smoothly.

"Gah!" The Alchemist flinched at the verbal riposte. "All right fine, I won't criticize."

"Good." I smiled, turning and taking Archer by the hand. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a lovely Maiden to escort back to her castle."

"NPC pervert." I heard Tabula mutter behind me as I left, but I ignored him.

The fool had no idea what my creations would become.

I walked away, a quick command of "Follow" ensuring the busty beauty remained by my side. I cut through a few side rooms on my way back to my little corner, only returning to the main halls as I spotted a familiar face. Er, skull.

"Momonga!" I called cheerfully. Archer continued to follow as I went, accompanying me as I walked up to the lich-like Overlord. "How's your NPC doing?"

The Overlord blinked, and I got a distinct feeling of embarrassment from him. "Ah, hello Ancient One-san."

I rolled my eyes. "Forget the honorifics, Momonga. We've been friends for years. And besides, you know there's no point in calling an old codger like me with respect." I peered past his voluminous robes, finally spotting the elusive figure after a few moments.

Behind the large, imposing figure stood a small blonde girl with an angelic smile. That's because that's exactly she was—an Angel.

After Momonga's initial plan of creating a neo-Nazi chunnibyou was soundly foiled by his own common sense, he had been at a loss for what to make. A thought triggered in my mind, sparking my imagination to begin creating ideas. Subtly, innocently, I had made a suggestion.

What if the guardian of the Treasure Vault, which was typically meant to be some terribly vicious and powerful creature, was actually the most innocent creature in Nazerick?

After my initial suggestion had flabbergasted him, I began explaining in more detail. He slowly caught on, and with a mixture of embarrassment and interest, he agreed. And so, the Angel known as Innocence was born.

Yes. The name sucks. But Momonga is hardly known for his naming sense.

I gave her the body and personality of Asia Argento, albeit with a few darker twists. Her puppy-like personality remained, as did her excitable cheer. She determinedly guarded the Vault not only because it was her task, but because 'it is wrong to steal'. If anyone dared trespass, she would appear in her full power as a Level 100 and punish the trespassers with death.

…Or, at least, that was the plan I told him. Until Momonga realized I had pranked him and she was now following him around like a baby duckling.

Laughing, I had assured him that I had given the adorable Angel enough Levels in Divination Magic to immediately tell if someone had gotten within even five hundred meters of the Vault and would use [Greater Teleportation] to get there within a moment's notice if such an intruder trespassed. His embarrassed pleas to convince me to stop the little Angel from following her 'beloved Momonga-sama' only fueled my laughter.

The lich himself didn't know enough about coding to stop her, and everyone else he asked found my joke too funny to ruin. So to this day, the fearsome, monstrous Overlord with burning crimson eyes and a cloak of everlasting darkness was constantly followed around Nazerick by a beautiful blonde Angel whose name described her very personality. The ultimate evil trailed by the ultimate innocence.

Muahahahaha—*cough, cough*.

"Well, if you don't want to acknowledge the adorability of Innocence, then I suppose I could change the subject." I said with mock reluctance. "Have you finished the Quest to get the [Trans Form] Skill quite yet?"

The sorcerer gave a long-suffering sigh. "I don't understand why you would ask me to learn Human Transformation. There's no point to it."

My one condition for returning Innocence to her post was that he learned the Transformation Skill. The Overlord had been confused by the seemingly odd demand, but I had remained tight-lipped about it. He wouldn't understand if I tried explaining, so I just acted as if it were a whim. After all, the needed Quest took over a month to complete without glitching it, so it could easily be interpreted as a way to keep Innocence attached to him for as long as possible.

"Bear with me." I smiled knowingly. "You'll thank me one day."

"I doubt it." He muttered, sighing. "I take it this is the NPC you keep telling me about?"

I smiled, gesturing to Archer. "This is Emiya Archer, my Maiden."

He nodded in approval, tapping something on his screen to bring up her data book. "Your custom NPC?"

"Yep." I smiled smugly, not that he could see my expression. Despite my humanoid features, the game remained unable to shift them into anything but their default look.

He examined the details at length, waiting until he had finished to pass judgement. "It's quite the impressive build." He admitted, seeming surprised. "How did you get the custom fighting moves?"

I glanced at the combat set 'CG Emiya Stance'. "I bought a kit in the cash shop, programmed them myself."

He nodded approvingly. "It looks like it works well with her high Attack Stats. Her Mana is unnaturally high, though. Why?"

I blinked. "…Let's just say I'm preparing for the future and leave it at that."

"All right." He finished reading it over, closing the screen. "She's very beautiful."

I nodded in agreement, squeezing her hand. "She is. But be careful, Innocence's feelings might be hurt."

"Ah, sorry Innocence." He blurted automatically, before pausing. "…Dammit, Ancient-san, now you have me talking to them too."

I nodded sagely. "I'm glad to have you on my side, new member of the NPCs Are People club."

"That isn't even a thing!" The lich protested.

I tilted my head. "Isn't it?"

He hesitated. "…Is it?"

"Of course not." I smirked. "Don't be silly, Momonga."

The salaryman sighed irritably. "Please stop jerking my chain, Ancient-san."

"Only after you drop the honorifics." I countered. "If other people can call me a pervy old man without me complaining, you can call me by my name without the -san bit."

He waved me off, beginning to walk again. "Go on, you. I have a Raid to get to."

I snickered, tugging Archer by the hand once more.

Momonga was all too easy to tease.

My plan to help others out with making their NPCs was simple—wait for them to ask me for help.

Really. It was that easy.

Most Players hadn't the faintest idea how to program a decent NPC, and the ones that did such as Blue Planet were more focused on other projects. As someone who was free most of the time, I was the obvious choice on who to ask for help.

They would call me over to see their NPC, explaining what they wanted for them. I would listen patiently, offer advice, then code the finished product. And even though to them it might seem that I was doing it out of goodwill, I was instead making damn well sure I knew who and what the NPCs of Nazarick were.

Beginning by clearing away a single misconception that would change the way they lived once they came to life.

Contrary to popular belief, the opposite of hatred is not love. Love and hate are the purest forms of passion, and changing one into the other is a mere matter of circumstance. No. The opposite of love is apathy. In both love and hatred you care what happens to the person you feel for, so would not the opposite of such emotions be not feeling at all?

Those I preached this to fell silent, considering my point. Sure, the Undead were supposed to hate the living, but were they, too, not alive? Would they hate their creators as much as their enemies?

So they changed their design. Not entirely, but enough to follow my suggestion. They were apathetic towards living beings—they wouldn't go out of their way to kill them, but so too would they calmly watch if one were dying in front of them.

It was definitely an improvement, since it removed one of the main challenges of taking a tomb of Undead into a different world. If they were neutral rather than hostile, it would allow me to watch them less closely and let them give more acceptable results.

Unfortunately, my listening ear and helpful advice had the side-effect of triggering what I liked to call 'Tell the GM About Your Character Syndrome'. There were two extremes—either they had no clue what to make their NPC into and just shrugged cluelessly when I asked, or they bombarded me with more information than I could ever code into such a limited space.

"—And so, that's why I decided to make them both cross-dress." Bukubukuchagama finished proudly.

I nodded, feigning comprehension. "I get it."

'But you don't, you poor fool. You don't.'

"Any advice while I'm making them?" The Slime chirped, finally finished with her half-hour explanation of the twin Dark Elf NPCs.

"Well…" I said slowly. "I'm just having trouble understanding one or two things. First… you're making these NPCs crossdress to piss off your brother, right?"

The Slime huffed. "That's a part of it, yes, but didn't you hear anything else I said?"

'Yes I did, you closet pervert.'

"It's just…" I began delicately, "…Aura's chest is flat, right?"

"Yes? What about it?" Bukubukuchagama shifted, 'face' turning towards said NPC.

"And you're making them to annoy your brother."

"Yes, I just said that."

"…But doesn't Peroroncino-san love flat-chested girls?" I tilted my head. "Like, a lot?"

Bukubukuchagama froze.

"…You know what, I think I might have to make these two a bit older." She said, as if she had just spontaneously come up with the idea herself. "Give them a bit more aesthetic value. It'll be for the best."

I nodded along, saying nothing about her sudden change of heart. That would be a quick way to hack her off. "I can lend you an NPC design kit if you want. You don't have to make her older than seventeen or so, which would let them keep the 'cuteness' you love and still let Aura have a larger chest."

"I suppose you're right." She agreed. "I'd like that, thanks. Two teenage NPCs, coming right up."

I sighed, burying my face in my hands.

This… this was a bit much, even for me.

"Tabula, I understand that you love horror games." I stated calmly. "But you have to understand. You can make her horrifying in plenty of ways without peeling all the skin off her face. An NPC with that sort of look would serve no purpose other than to be horrifying. Wouldn't it be better to completely redesign her as an actual eldritch horror, then make her the most pleasant person imaginable?"

Tabula stared at me as if I had come down from the heavens on a winged chariot. "That is the best idea I've ever heard. Quick, help me figure out how to make an Elder God into an NPC!"

...To be fair to him, the Developers in this game might have actually made a Race like that.

I looked over the unfinished wall of Lemegeton Golems, tilting my head. "Luci Fer-san, isn't it a bit silly to leave a project like this half-done? I mean, you only have only three left? At this point it would be easier to finish, wouldn't it?"

The lazy Angel sighed, nodding reluctantly. "…Fine. But only if you help. I'm not going to be suffering alone."

I glanced at my Inventory, which was stocked with an obscene amount of Celestial Uranium. "Believe me, it's not a problem in the slightest."

"Hmm? Of course, Blue Planet-san. I'd love to help you with a forest area. We could even add a swamp or two, just for variety. It'll make it even harder for invaders to get through."

The Player sent smile emote, voice grateful. "Thanks, Ancient One-san. No one else wants to help when they have projects of their own."

I chuckled. "Oh, believe me, I have nothing but time these days." I waved a clawed hand. "Though, would you mind if I found a place to store my weapons? I'm running out of space, you see…"

"So I heard you're looking for Ouroboros again?"

This came from Ulbert, who had made the trip up to my unfinished room on Floor 9 to watch me terraform it. The area was still a work-in-progress, but the room itself was large enough for me to move around comfortably in my Dragon form. The Developers had given me temporary access to console commands in order to make the lone room bigger than it had any right to be. Ulbert had asked to watch me do it, seeming endlessly amused as I created the TARDIS-like space.

"Yes, why do you ask?" I glanced up from the area's Decoration Screen, pausing in the middle of placing a new tree.

"Well, I wanted to know what you were going to do with it." He leaned back comfortably, his back to a tall pine. "Hypothetically, of course."

"Not quite sure yet." I went back to working, adding a few more trees to the area. Perhaps a nice lake for the outer edge? "I'm sure it'll be used for something interesting, rest assured."

"Ancient One-san… you've used one-use World Items how many times over the years." Ulbert said slowly. "How. Many. Times. And only gotten junk to show for it. Are you sure you're not just wasting your time?"

I felt a tad offended at that. "It's not junk." I twitched my ears, which each had a ring through them like a mock earring. They were always shifted there whenever I shifted forms, locking in place until I changed back. "I've got these, too. One lets me store infinite experience for various Spells, and the other is an item so broken it's basically an unofficial World Item."

That made him pause. "Really? What does it do?"

I chuckled, swiping a talon down. A screen appeared, text floating by. "It lets me use a unique Tenth-Tier Spell called 'Wish'. …Ulbert-san? Are you all right?"

The goat was silently face-palming. "Why didn't you just buy the bloody cash item that lets you use [Wish Upon a Star] for free, then?" He asked through gritted teeth.

"Because that only works three times." I tilted my head. "And it's a gachapon prize, so I'd probably end up shoving my life's savings in there before I saw a peep of silver. No, this Spell might be less powerful, but I can use it a lot more reliably without sacrificing any EXP."

"A completely different Spell, then?" I could tell the goat was interested, despite himself. "Mind filling me in?"

I considered for a few moments. I had actually talked it over with the Devs for quite some time before we came to an arrangement. I based the original idea off the D&D variant of the Spell, which made it a lot easier for them to design once they dusted off the textbooks.

I decided it was simply easier to show him rather than reading the whole screen aloud, so I made the change to human form so I could more easily dequip the item.

"[Trans Form: Human]." I intoned, activating the Skill.

My shape shrunk, shifting and changing as the Skill went to work. It was only a five-second animation, but it still took long enough to inconvenience me in a fight. I stepped forward a moment later, now in my 'human' form. I had deep blue hair that was pulled into a single long warrior braid down my back, shimmering oddly in the light. Golden eyes with slit pupils were the only thing left to remind others of my true form, gleaming like a cat's and drawing attention to my unnaturally sharp canines.

"…I still think that Avatar makes you look like a girl."

I sighed irritably. "Look, the hair is part of my Race. The long braid shows that I'm a very very old member of the Warrior Caste, and since the Elders are the closest things Dragons have to royalty, this is the closest thing I have to a crown." I shot the Demon a glare. "And no, it does not make me look like a girl. I'm almost two meters tall, for God's sake."

Sure enough, my form towered over the goat Demon. An outfit of blue furs were draped over muscles strong enough to uproot a tree, a stand-in for armor I couldn't equip. My features were undeniably masculine, as was my general body structure. All in all, I like to think I did a wonderful job designing the thing. I could take a shorter version of the form if I swapped to True Human rather than my preferred Half-Giant transformation, but it was a lot of fun to be the tallest person in the room.

"I know." The Demon said innocently. "But I've seen some Amazon mobs with that exact hairstyle."

I grumbled to myself, sliding the ring off my finger and ignoring his snickering. This had become somewhat of a staple of our Clan's gameplay, where we made fun of each other's Avatars until someone got mad. It was all in good fun, and since we were all inhuman anyway, it was quite easy to find oddities in each others' forms. "Look, do you want to see this or not?" I asked, holding up the ring.

"Yes, yes." Ulbert wiped a nonexistent tear from his eye. "I'll stop now."

I passed it over, allowing Ulbert to see it for himself. He wordlessly brought it up and swiped down a few times, reading the text I knew by heart.

Wish is the mightiest spell a mortal creature can cast. By simply speaking aloud, the caster can alter the very foundations of reality in accord with their desires. The basic use of this Spell is to duplicate any other Spell of this Spell's Tier or lower. The caster does not need to meet any requirements in that Spell, including costly components. The Spell simply takes effect at the significantly higher MP cost, taking 5% of the caster's health in the process.

Alternatively, the caster can create one of the following effects of their choice once every three days:

-You create one object of up to 250,000 gold in value that isn't a magic item. The object can be no more than 300 feet in any dimension, and it appears in an unoccupied space you can see on the ground.

-You allow up to twenty creatures that you can see to regain all HP, clearing any status effects they may have. For every creature healed this way, 2% of your total Life is consumed.

-You grant up to five creatures that you can see intermediate resistance to a Damage type you choose.

-You grant up to five creatures you can see immunity to a single Spell or Skill for 1 hour. For instance, you could make yourself and all your companions immune to a lich's Life Drain attack, but not its superior form Touch of Death.

-You undo a single recent event by forcing a reroll of any roll made within the last five minutes. Reality reshapes itself to accommodate the new result. For example, a Wish Spell could undo an opponent's successful save, a foe's critical hit, or a friend's failed dodge. This can only be done once per week.

The stress of casting this Spell to produce any effect other than duplicating another Spell weakens the caster severely. After enduring that stress, they cannot cast another Spell until the time limit has passed. In addition, any person under the effect of one of the Spell's buffs will perish if the caster dies.

Ulbert nodded slowly, closing the screen. "I see. So it's a trump card designed to fill in a missing role in the midst of the fight, yes?"

I nodded, reaching out to take back the ring. "Yes. It prevents me from casting anything else, but at that point my Mana pool is pretty much depleted and I have to rely on my Skills anyway."

"I think I can understand the value of such a ring for your character's build, but it's pretty specialized. For someone who raids endgame Bosses on a weekly basis it's fine, but no else would see the point."

I chuckled, slipping the ring back on my finger. "I know. No one else would be able to use it anyway. I have to put everything I want Wish to do into code format in order to mod the game slightly. It saved the Devs hours of work to do it that way, and I know the system well enough that it doesn't really matter." I paused, glancing over to him. "Come to think of it… how is your build doing these days? I heard you got the World Disaster Job Class recently."

The goat Demon seemed to puff with pride. "Yes. In fact, it's one of the best builds ever, if I do say so myself. Do you remember that one bugged Quest we did all that time ago which let me cash in the rewards sixteen times?"

I thought back. "Oh, yes. That one was fun, even if I did have to tell the Devs about it eventually. What about it?"

"Do you remember the Queen of Shiba's reward?"

"Yeah. Shiba gives a five percent increase in Mana regenerated per minute, plus ten percent to Global Critical Strike Multiplier, and plus five percent to Fire Elemental Resistances. Times sixteen, obviously, so that just about caps your Resists to their max of 75% and gives your Crits some serious oomph. I'd wager the Resists are negated by your Job Classes, unfortunately, but it still grants some ridiculous Mana regen, right?"

The Demon looked impossibly smug. "Oh, yes." He practically purred. "And my most powerful Spell? Well, let's just say I can cast it two times more than anyone else possibly could. Without that exploit, my character wouldn't have been able to spam Spells like I do. I'm practically a living cheat!"

I belatedly wondered if me teaching a few of the Players how to break the game had made them unfairly broken. "I… see. That sounds amazing. Rain hellfire down on your enemies, am I right?"

"Exactly!" He agreed with a bit too much cheerfulness. "Which actually brings me to what I came here to ask. Once I hit Level 100, could you help me Craft an endgame weapon?"

I blinked, thrown by the sudden change in topic. Most Players preferred to make their own custom weapons, despite me having the Job Class and materials needed to give them truly overpowered ones. "Really? What kind?"

"Preferably a staff of some sort. Something that gives me a bonus to Cast Speed or reduces the Mana cost of Spells."

"That shouldn't be a problem…" I hummed, tilting my head. "I'm building an armory now on Floor 6 with Blue Planet-san. Just drop by my house when you're ready and I can take you around to have a look."

"Thanks, Ancient-san." He sent a smile emoji. "Ah, I can't wait~!"

We both politely neglected to mention the metric fuckton of grinding he had to do to finally get there.

No matter how good you are, no matter what the game, the last 10 Levels are always a bitch to get.

Actually…

"Oi… Ulbert-san…" The niggling idea in the back of my mind finally surfaced, coming out in a rush. "Do you know how we always dreamed of taking over a World?"

"Hmm? Of course I do. All of us Guild RPers wanted to at least give it a shot." Ulbert went silent for a few seconds. "…Why do you ask?"

I smiled. "Well, see, you know how I have an eye for spotting exploits in the game?"

The Demon nodded slowly, backing a safe distance away. "…Go on."

"Well, there's this project I've been working on over the past few years…"

Word count: 5500