CHAPTER 20

OPHELIA'S POV

It was easy to get out of bed today, as I didn't even get a wink of sleep last night. I went into the bathroom and washed my face. I saw the 16 on my wrist when I was brushing my teeth.

Once I was done, I looked at my reflection. I had to make a decision. I could either let Xavier push me away or convince him to let me in. The first one was easier.

As I looked into my mirror, with my hand on my pale cheek, I made my mind.

I wasn't going to give up this easily. I wanted to prove Damon wrong about me being emotionally weak.

I wanted to prove myself wrong.

I wanted to prove Xavier wrong. He couldn't push me away from himself this easily.

I jumped into the shower and washed my hair. As the water ran over my face, I let it wash away my worries. I blow-dried my hair and paired up my outfit for school. I found a cute yellow sweater along with my blue jeans.

I decided to wear my hair down.

I went downstairs and saw Luna having breakfast with my parents.

"Good Morning, Luna! Doesn't she look pretty, mum?"

Luna always tried to make my relationship with my mum healthier but you can't water a dead plant, can you?

My dad never interfered. His relationship with his wife was too precious for him.

I didn't care. I really didn't but some days it hit harder than the usual.

My mum just nodded her head and got back to her breakfast.

"Do you want to join, Lia honey?"

Now that came from my dad. I just shook my head. I couldn't bear to stand there for a second longer. If I did then all the time I spent in front of the mirror to create positivity would go to waste.

"Nah, it's fine. Thank you! But I've got to get to school."

I walked towards the exit and quickly left. I got into my car and wrapped my arms around myself. I tried to take a deep breath while I hugged myself.

I tried my best to be the perfect daughter. The daughter she wanted.

But I failed.

Every damn time.

Something or the other would come up and we would be back to step one.

But I had to stay strong.

If not for myself, then for Xavier.

He needed me.

I fastened my seat belt and turned on the ignition.

I quickly pulled up near the main building and found a spot right across the entrance. I parked my car and got out.

I had some free time before the classes started so I decided to check up on Dawn. I tried calling her cell but she didn't pick up. There were only three situations when she didn't pick up my call.

One, she was angry with me.

Two, she was busy.

And three, she lost her phone.

It was probably the second one. I made a mental note to call her tonight.

I still had a few minutes left before my first class, so I thought of spending some time in the library. The library wasn't in the main building; it was located in the third block.

I plugged in my earphones and Viva La Vida by Coldplay started playing; one of my favorites.

"Hey, Lia!"

I turned around and saw Michelle waving at me. I quickly removed my earphones. Michelle and I were friends since the fourth grade. We even shared a few classes. We weren't that close but we could always count on each other.

"Hey, Elle! How are you?"

She looked as if she was in a hurry. I saw a bunch of pamphlets in her hand. A bead sweat rolled down her face as she took a deep breath to calm herself down.

"I'm hosting a party tonight as my parents are both on a business trip. You must come!! You can bring your friends along too. It starts at 9. Here take one"

I was not going to the party. I mean, it's not that I don't like parties. I do. I just wasn't in the mood for it with everything happening with Xavier and Azrail.

I didn't want to say no so I just accepted the pamphlet.

"I'm not sure if I can as it's pretty late but I will definitely try."

She looked a little disappointed but I didn't wanna lie and then be a no show.

"Okay, try to come, Lia. I'll get going now."

We parted ways and started walking towards the library. I remember dragging Dawn to all these parties and the great times we had.

If the old me saw me rejecting a party, she would have called me a serious loser.

Just as I was about to enter the library, I saw Xavier walking towards the main building.

He must have used the opposite entrance.

He wore this white t-shirt I saw lying near his bed last night along with a pair of jeans. He had a jacket thrown on top as winter was just around the corner.

His head was down as he walked at a brisk speed but I could see his eyes.

They looked tired.

Tired of living.

He looked up, probably sensing someone staring at him. He looked around and when his head finally turned towards me, our eyes locked.

His green eyes were captivating. They were glassy like the reflection of the leaves from the early morning dew. One look into them and you know life is worth living. They shone bright but at the same time had lost its sparkle. Like a star that is about to die.

Despite the decision I'd made this morning, I wanted him to approach me. To show that he cared. Just a little bit. I just wanted to be cared for.

My mum didn't care neither did my dad. Luna cared but I don't think I deserve it.

I just wanted to be held. For a little time. Maybe even a minute would be enough.

I shook out of it and smiled at him. I was going to walk towards him but he started moving away. He acted like he didn't even know me.

As I stood there, all I wanted to do was run away. Away from all those who couldn't care less about me. But it wasn't the only reason I wanted to run.

If I disappeared, would anyone run after me?

Probably not.