6 Chapter 6: Surge

"It's okay. I thought it..." Is he mad? Has his mind gone elsewhere? He kisses me and takes it back when I responded. It's like I was being lured into a dead end all the time.

"I'm really sorry." He's making that sad face again. The atmosphere is very awkward now.

"Whose going to make the schedules?" I asked as out of the blue to release the awkward tension. I quickly opened the phone and browsed for a schedulling application.

"Okay. What time would we wake up? For the honeymoon period?"

"I guess around 6 am? You know this is not going to work. We're not robots with constant daily routines. I rather enjoy the honeymoon period. Do you agree with me." He tapped the table and gazed at my eyes. I nodded. "I'm going to make some pie and some dinner. What filling would you like?"

"I heard peaches and mangoes combined is good. We have canned mangoes and peaches in the canned goods box."

"Okay, just help me out."

Arodelf quickly unloaded one box in the counter. "Micella. You want a hot pie or a chilled pie?"

"Whatever suits you. We still haven't set up the kitchen supplies though."

"Do you want to arrange the stuff with me or do you want to rest for a while? I'm just going to clean the stuff myself. Not that I'm pushing you to rest, we just had a long day. I want to surprise you."

"Don't you want to rest too?"

"These things can't fix themselves."

"Just let me help you with those. I promised that I won't get in the way on how you planned to arrange the things. I promise!" I smiled.

He held his blush with his hands. "Okay. Come help me with these things."

"You can unbox the box of canned goods and place them by the categories listed in the paper." He pointed at a low rack."

"You got all that planned in your head the minute you came inside the kitchen is it?"

"It's true." He smiled and cleaned the countertops and washed the dish rack and ceramic plates. "Micella, do you remember your surname?"

"No."

"Do you remember mine?"

"Yes. Do you remember mine then?"

"Yes. Please whisper it to me."

It was always silence that falls between us. After the war, we were given our names and family codes. Trained and drugges us to forget, gave us medications and such to forget our past identities.There was one flaw though. We can never forget the names of others nor the memories we made with them.

"Okay."

There was an established set of laws that changed everything. The New Society Law is a solid set of laws aimed to forget the previous years of pre-war. It's solid but it has lot of holes. Parents can never instruct a child of their heritage, family history and lineage. Children are not allowed to question their parents of their heritage, family history and lineage. Siblings are not allowed to converse about their heritage, family history or lineage. Friends can never converse in public about their heritage, family history or lineage. No one is allowed to write down their heritage, family history and lineage.

"It's…" I whispered to his ears. His hair smelled like tangerine and hydrangeas.

"Yours..." He whispered to me in a silent manner. His breath was hot against my skin. I can sense that he's been smelling my rose and cherry perfume.

We never violated the law. A fatal flaw to their system of biennial pairing-- they pair intelligent people. It was refereshing to hear my whole name. At least if we can remember it as time flies by.

Arodelf kept scrubbing the plates. I typed down the things we're going to do tomorrow.

I wanted to ask about the health services, "Whose going to... "

"You know Micella. I though of something. This is supposed to be our honeymoon? Isn't it?" He spoke with his back turned to me while rinsing the plates with the water.

"Yes and... "

"And?" I doubted.

"Should we tell about our preferences in," he pointed upstairs, "first?" He didn't even look at me.

"Why are you saying that?" I cupped my mouth with my hands and blushed.

He looked at me and he gestured me to get closer, "We'll talk inside the bedroom. Under the sheets where all is muffled and they won't here a thing. We can draw our messages in our skin that way. We can communicate without being liable. Is that okay?"

I nodded and whispered 'oh dear' at his response. Protocol. He smiled at me and he held my hand and kissed it.

He rinsed his hands and put the apron on top of the counter. He held my hand and we climbed the stairs and off we go to the bedroom.

Arodelf took off his shirt and put it on the bedside. He laid on the bed and tapped something on his old phone. A lo-fi music blurted out from his phone and asked me to edge closer.

He hugged me. His hands were enveloping me, "I remember you were in love with a college friend before. You were so lovestupid that you don't know what to do with life anymore. When we graduated, I never had the chance to see you again. I recall you posted something on social media that your boyfriend proposed to you. I was a bit happy about it and decided I wanted to marry my current girlfriend as well. Then hell broke loose. I saw you when we were sending out petitions to save our loved ones from the war. You're boyfriend was alive but was sent to medical care. My girlfriend died."

"I remember that. Do you miss Nieva? I missed her too. I'm sorry for your lost. It was my lost too. She was a very dear friend."

"I missed her but she's gone. What would I do then? I can't kill myself. If I did, a punishment would be executed to many people. I have to tell you the truth though before I ruin the moment."

"What truth?" My back is literally sweating. "I'm just going to turn on the air conditioner, okay." I searched for the remote and saw it in a drawer. I took it out and set the temperature on a comfortable scale. I sat a few inches from him.

"The truth is I had my eyes for you for a very long time ever since you presented yourself in front of the class. I won't deny that I was very attracted to you and I won't deny that what was stopping me from loving you is your physical appearance and recklessness."

"That burned a little. I guess I was reckless and…fat."

Arodelf laughed and took my hand, "You've changed and matured and I can't even figure out what to say next. It's like a dream come true; this perfect world constructed better versions of people. I have dreamed of this."

"Dreamed of this?" I reacted.

"I've always dreamed about you calling out my name. I've always wanted to be with you like this, to love you, to reach out to you, to see your face again, to tell you how I feel. I thought I'll never see you again after the war."

He edged closer and hugged me, "No wonder they send me tangerine and hydrangeas as my perfume. You liked them do you?"

"Yes and you liked the rose and blossoms perfume is it?"

"It would smell nice for my wife."

"I see. I thought they were picking out scents for me specifically."

He giggled and looked at me in the eyes. It was a long stare and he did not evaded my gaze this time. He started unbuttoning my blousse and whispered, "Is it alright for me to do this?"

I grabbed his hand and told him, "I can do it myself." I think I ruined the mood.

"Oh come on, Micella." He puts his hands on his face as if I was a huge disappointment.

"I was afraid just... " He held both of my wrist and pushed me on the bed, "Are we...?"

"Do you...?"

He nodded. I nodded.

He kissed me gently on the forehead. I can feel little drops of tears on my face, "I can't believe I'm doing this. I can't believe that all that sacrifice in the war would just boil down to this. I just can't wrap my head in this thing. This is just too much."

I hugged him.

He hugged back, "I remembered Nieva. I'm sorry. Each and everytime I kiss you, I remember kissing Nieva. I sacrificed everything in the war. I killed people, Micella! I killed lots of them just to win in this fruitless war! I hope I did it all for my family just to come home hearing that my father was dead and that my girlfriend is in her deathbed." He was sobbing. He was trying his best to calm down but he just sobbed. I rested my back on the wall and he rested his head on my chest. I know he can hear my heartbeat.

"I know the pain you feel. I can feel your pain. I'm sorry to hear that Delf."

The air was cold and the rain is soft but it won't just stop pouring.

Still, nothing happened.

He rested his head on my lap and he whispered, "Everything's gonna be alright." He exclaimed that lots of times. I caressed his hair and kissed his head, "I'm here Arodelf. I will never leave you."

"I'm never going to leave you too, Micella."

"Do you want to eat some dinner first?" I asked.

A little tear escaped from the side of his eye.

"Okay, what are we going to have?" I asked him.

"Let's have tea. Spearmint tea."

I know where he is coming from.

He sighed, "I might do something carnal if you sleep."