02: Disgusting Secrets

[Johanne Wayland.]

[McDonald's.]

I can't believe I actually agreed to this guy's request.

My left eye can't stop twitching as I watch this despicable man sitting in front of me while stuffing four chips and a large burger in his mouth. I can see that he hasn't really eaten yet. He looked decent enough so I thought he was lying to me. His clothes look normal too. White tee, and black pants.

This guy's foreign, his dark-blue, messy, hair and blue eyes were a proof of that, he's insanely tall too, and pale, like really pale. Paler than me. I wonder, how old is he?

He looked up from his burger and smiled a cheeky one. I just gave him a deadpanned stare.

We went here after we were interrogated by the police. I was the only one who answered though, because this guy here is too creepy to make him tell them his point of view.

I left him there afterwards but this tall guy followed me around like a stray dog. I told him to stay away from me but he kept making a scene so I just gave him what he wants. After this I'm dumping him elsewhere.

"Have you got a name?" I asked. He looked at me and swallowed.

"Deus," he beamed. Why do I have this feeling that this guy is not telling me the truth?

"Ikaw, anong pangalan mo? You look like you're about my age," he said as he stuffs his mouth with more chips. Gross. How can he eat like this?

"Bakit, ilang taon ka na ba?" tanong ko.

"I asked first," This. This attitude of his is what interests me the most. It's like he's seeing everything as a challenge.

"My name's Johanne," I sighed. "Johanne Wayland."

"I'm seventeen," he said and smile again. He really smiles a lot and I don't like it.

My left eye twitched.

How dare he fucking eat like he doesn't owe me a thing? But he's right, I am seventeen.

I looked outside the glass wall, since we picked a seat somewhere in the corner where people inside won't see us."Do you . . . " I began. He stared at me, waiting for whatever I'm gonna say. "Earlier . . . do you mean what you said? When you said that—"

"You could kill me?" He interrupted.

I looked at him with creased forehead. There it is again. How could he talk about death with a straight face? Like it's nothing? For years I've been running away from death and this guy is like a death addict of some sort.

He flashed an innocent grin. "Yes, I mean it." He sipped on his soda.

I just stared at him. Not sure of what to say, I just felt my mouth hung open.

He chuckled and inserted a chip in my mouth. Bloody—now, that's just rude! I glared at him and inhale sharply through my nose.

"Death is equal." He shrugged. "Supposed to be," I took a mental note of that, "there's no gender, no color, no good nor evil, no right nor wrong, only oblivion," he followed as he plays with his cup. Looking at it ruefully.

"Supposedly?" I raised a brow at him and picked up a potato chip and ate it quietly.

"Supposedly. Since, I'm an exception." He chuckled darkly, like he has some inside joke with himself. After a while, stuffing another burger in his mouth.

"For someone who's so keen on dying, you sure do eat a lot. Kung nagpapakamatay ka bakit 'di mo i-try gutumin ang sarili mo hanggang sa mamatay ka?" I inquired and pointed a pathetic chip on his face.

"Naisip ko 'yan kanina bago 'yung nangyari sa truck. It's a worthless idea. I do want to die, it's just that . . . I don't die. I can't die." He scratched his head. Disappointment apparent on his face.

"I'm sorry, what?" I blinked in disbelief.

He cracked a smile.

"Pardon me, but I have a hard time processing what you just said, what do you mean you can't die?" naguguluhang tanong ko.

"You're a walking contradiction yourself," he stated and laughed. I raised a fucking brow. "You talk like you don't care but act like you do, you refused to feed me before but look, I'm quite full. You're a nice guy but act like you're not." He smiled lopsidedly.

"I don't need your impression about me, I'm asking about what you said," Gods, this guy is starting to annoy me.

He scrutinised my face before deciding to explain. "I can't die." He sighed. "I'm immortal."

I just stared blankly at him.

He chukled darkly. "Aren't you gonna laugh? You think I'm lying, right?"

"It's not something to laugh at, innit?" I replied and sipped on my pop. "And for the record? I don't think you're lying, for some reason the only thing I can count on you is that you love death so much."

That doesn't mean I believe in him either. You can't claim something you can't prove. I don't know what I'm saying anymore, mate. This day has been odd enough.

Animatedly, his eyes lit up like a child and I swear to the Gods, I saw sparkles in it.

"Johanne! Yahari, ore wa seikai datta! Omae wa ii yatsu da ne!" I didn't really understand what he just said. But I know for a fact that he is not Japanese, but he's fluent in it. Bloody brilliant!

"I have a feeling you said that I was a nice guy." I shook my head.

"Yep, because you are, OMG!" after finishing the burger, he crumpled its wrapper and pulled something out of his pockets.

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang mapagtanto kung ano ang inilabas n'ya. A butterfly knife. My eyes turned to slits as I watched him in askance, methodically fiddling with it.

"What's that for?" I skeptically asked.

He smiled crookedly. I don't like that smile. "You want proof, right?"

My brows furrowed at that because I'm not sure where this is going. Nagulat at napatayo nalang ako nang bigla n'yang saksakin ang kaliwang kamay n'ya na nakapatong sa lamesa. I couldn't believe what I'm seeing, I glanced around the diner to see if anyone's noticed what he's done. Fortunately, people are oblivious to the scene, also we're in a tight corner where we wouldn't be seen easily.

His blood gushed out placidly over his hand where the knife is still intact. Para namang napako ako sa kinatatayuan ko nang tanggalin n'ya ang pagkakabaon nito sa likod ng palad n'ya. Saka naman umapaw ang napakaraming dugo. At least his food's already gone at hindi ito natalsikan.

Okay, I think I've seen enough and maybe it's time to start panicking. I hung out with and fed a psychopath.

"What the actual fuck?!"

He snickered. "Chill," he assured while wiping his blood off his knife and table.

"Chill?! You think I can chill?!" I hissed. This guy is fucking insane!

"Shh," he grinned. "Just watch." He raised his left arm. Ugh, disgusting.

I stared at his hand, anxiously waiting for some shit to happen. Suddenly, his wound started closing and—ew! Is that . . . ? Is that a vein? Ugh, repulsive! His cells and tissues are quickly dispatching . . . It's like, cloning. Finally his wound closed, then he wiped the excess blood from his hand and showed me his now brand new arm.

"It looks creepy in reality, I know." He flexed his arm and sighed. "In movies it looks cool, right? Now I can't trust films anymore." He chuckled darkly. "You see, in movies, when people regenerate even the blood goes back in the flesh. But mine doesn't. It creates another batch of fresh cell, new blood and new tissues. Basta kapag nakalabas na sa katawan ko gagawa ulit ng panibago."

I felt like I lost all my energy. Nanghihinang napaupo naman ako ulit. I don't know if this is traumatising or fascinating or what. I don't fucking know what to feel.

Then an idea suddenly popped up in my mind.

"Gumagawa ng panibago? What if mapugutan ka ng ulo? Magpo-produce ka ba ng bagong ulo?"

He gave me an incredulous look. "I have never thought of that." Then he laughed out loud. He caught the attention of some people and I had to cover my face with both my hands. This guy is embarrassing to be with.

"You're weird," he stated with a grin.

"Oh, I'm weird?!" I shrieked. "You stabbed your hand in front of me and I'm weird?!" I blinked four times to let what he said sink in. This fucking twat just called me weird!

"I did stab my hand." He cleaned the table using the extra napkins and looked up at me. "And people's normal reaction would be running away, screaming and calling me a freak." He smiled bitterly.

Well, he's right. A normal person wouldn't even want to be a meter close to him.

I let out a sigh.

"Maybe because I'm a freak too . . . "

His forehead creased but his eyes burned with curiosity and interest.

"Five years ago, I discovered that I have some kind of talent—or ability—which allows me to see five to seven seconds of my future." I hesitated. I stared at him. Analysing his expression; It didn't change so I assumed it's safe to continue. "It only activates when I'm in danger." I swallowed a lump from my throat. Talking about this 'talent' really makes me giddy. "It's a pretty convenient gift, but at the same time traumatising because sometimes I see my death in that five to seven second future."

He gaped at me. Eyes wide with awe.

"Sugoi! Subarashii!" he exclaimed while clapping. "Amazing!"

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. "Amazing? You have regenerative powers and my ability is amazi—"

Without even finishing my sentence, my left eye lost its sight and I can feel hot liquid pooling down my face.

The only thing my right eye can see, is the face of Deus, grinning maniacally at me.

He stabbed me in the eye.

•••13THSQUAD•••

That was my future.

And before it could happen, I backed away a few centimeters when his butterfly knife could barely touch my left eye.

I immediately stood up.

"A–re, sugoi ne!" He looked incredibly pleased with what happened.

I won't take my chances with this psychopath anymore so I just, "WHAT THE FUCK? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!" I screeched as I stand up.

Everybody turned to us, which probably alarmed the securities and staffs.

"Shh." He put his finger over his mouth and looked around. "Sit down, Johanne, you'll disturb everyone's meal." He chuckled and motioned for me to sit again. Which I didn't do because I don't trust anything he says anymore. So I just stared at him. Aghast.

He sighed but still smiling. "I'm not trying to kill you." He looked up at me. "No, not really." He smiled as if convincing me. Nope, not convinced. "I just wanted to see your abilities—" still not convinced, "—and wow, what you said is true because I never gave any hints that I would stab you with the knife, and when you backed away it's like you know where I would aim. I can't dismiss this with just having fast reflex." He thoughtfully said. This guy is a chatterbox. "You really can see your future when you're in danger!" He grinned.

This guy . . . is seriously fucking nuts.

"You . . . tried to stab me . . . for experiment?" I'm still having a hard time believing anything that's happening. I know my world is weird, but this day is so odd I just want to think that I'm having a nightmare.

This is just a nightmare.

Right?

The cunt sitting across the table, just smiled. I shivered.

Nothing scares me more than how I would die. But now, it's like I'm seeing Death, had a chat with him and begging him to not take me.

I know for a fact that Deus might be the personification of Death. The one who takes people's souls? What do you call him?

Ah, the Grim Reaper.

I can't let him take my soul yet.

I flinched when the Grim Reaper stood up and bowed before me. He smiled ruefully.

I felt guilty, a little.

The Grim Reaper felt offended that I flinched away. Not my fault. Not my problem. I shouldn't feel like I needed to apologise.

"Thank you for the meal. Really, Johanne" he sincerely said. Looked at me and flashed a set of white teeth. "And thank you for saving me."

"I—" He stared at me as I stutter. I can't fucking think of what to fucking say. I shook my head and inhaled sharply. "Where are you going now?" brilliant, that's the only thing that came out of my stupid mouth.

"I don't really know." Grim Reaper scratched his head. "I'm an orphan, you see . . ." he trailed off. "I don't even have relatives."

Wow. That's sad. I think I kinda know why he became like this.

"So, now what?" I asked.

Nagkibit balikat s'ya at nilagpasan ako.

"Farewell Johanne, see you when I see you." He winked and waved at me.

"Wait."

Wait. Why?

He stopped in his tracks and gave me a confused look.

"You said . . ." well shit. Here goes nothing, "you said I can do whatever I want with you, right?"

"Yeah . . . ?" He looked weirded-out.

I facepalmed. "Okay, that came out wrong than I expected. What I'm trying to say is . . . live with me."

He blinked then nodded.

"Wait, shit. Ugh. That still came out wrong." Pailing-iling na sabi ko na ikinatawa n'ya naman. Grim Reaper's clearly enjoying this. I wanna punch him so bad.

"Sir—"

"Yes, we know. We're leaving anyways," a McDonald's crew came up to us because it seems like we're bothering people with our little stunt. I didn't mean to sound agitated but I am, sorry not sorry.

Deus shrugged. I walked away and he followed me.

Okay. Why the fuck did I just invite Grim Reaper to my house?!

We're a few blocks away from McDonald's when Deus asked me, "Johanne, why did you want me to go with you?"

"I haven't an idea, mate." I sighed. "Not one bit."

He chuckled at that and tried to match my pace.

"You're really a nice guy, eh?"

"Whatever." I sighed. Talking to him drains my energy. Then I remembered something. "Deus, why are you speaking Japanese earlier?" My brows furrowed. "You're not Japanese, are you?" he doesn't look Asian, but what do I know, right?

"Nope." He popped the 'p'. "I'm Italian. And to your other question, nothing special really." He yawned. "Nasanay lang ako. 'Yung asawa at mga anak kasi ng Tita ko na kumupkop sa 'kin ay Japanese."

So, you mean, basically, this guy is a linguist. Wicked.

"You said you have no relatives," I reminded him.

"Yep." He chuckled. "I have no relatives anymore, not that I didn't have them." I glared at him. "S'yempre hindi na ako pwedeng bumalik sa kanila when they gave me to the orphanage. I will be such an ungrateful trash, don't you think?" He smiled at me.

So, he came from the orphanage. Wow, this guy has so many issues. I'm starting to pity him.

We turned to a curve, malapit na kami sa bahay ko. I cleared my throat and asked him something I noticed.

I noticed he calls himself a trash, so when I pointed it out he looked at me like I was the dumbest person on the planet.

He said, "eh? But what else would I be? A trash is a trash, right?"

So I snapped, "you're not a trash! You're a human being!"

"I stopped being human when I lost the ability to die," he refuted scornfully.

That rendered me speechless. Deus loathed his power and thinks of it as a curse. He thinks death is the vital core of human existence, therefore, he thinks he has no right to live because he can't die. What a foolish ideal.

After a few arguments about humans and life, in general, we finally reached my flat.

"Won't your family be mad about you taking in a trash like me?" he asked.

I stopped walking. So did he.

"No, because I live alone." I heaved a sigh and pointed at the house in front of us.

"Wow . . . " he's in awe as he roams his eyes at the whole building. I opened the door and waited for him but he stepped back. "This looks just like the abandoned house I was staying at."

His comment at my rundown flat offended me on a spiritual level.

"Well sorry about that! I'm in hiding! I can't afford to attract their attention!" I blurted out. Then I realised it's too late to take back the words I just said.

Fuck, Johanne. What the actual fuck you bloody idiot.

"Oh?" He smirked. "So you're a fugitive." He observed and walked inside.

"YOU DON'T OWN THE PLACE, AND I'M NOT A FUGITIVE!"

"Don't worry, I have no care in whatever you do with your life, I just want to be fed." He's fiddling with things inside. I'm trying to close the door when I heard some glass shatter.

My left eye twitched.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"

I heard him laugh so I immediately closed the goddamned door and pray that all this madness would fucking go away.