1 Only Star

Cold. The feeling engulfing him as he stared up into the dark night sky. The bright luminous stars mocking his existence as they twinkled together in harmony. Thousands of thoughts ran through his head as he watched the array of stars swirl above him; dancing against the dark background. Soft, shallow breaths were heard from beside him. He wondered if the man next to him had finally fallen asleep. However, he couldn't take his eyes off the scattered stars that glistened mirroring the tears forming in his eyes. "It's beautiful", a deep voice whispered next to him.

Blinking the tears away he turned his head slightly and eyed the blonde. Eyes round as he stared in wonder above the two of them. There was a poignant pause as he watched the man concentrate on every individual star above them. "You know when someone dies their soul turns into a star," the man mumbled quietly, never once removing his eyes from the illuminated abyss. A lump formed in his throat as he listened to the man speak. "They look so happy," he whispered, his voice quivering. A sorrowful smile twitched at the man's lips as he continued to stare longingly at the night sky.

"Do you think they are friendly?" the man's voice wavered as he asked the inevitable question to his best friend.

To anyone else, this would be out of the ordinary. However, to them, there was a dark, underlying truth to the question the blonde man uttered.

"When it comes to you, I'm certain they will be," the boy responded in a broken whisper. Their eyes met after a moment; glossed over with tears, glistening in the moonlight.

The blonde brought a hand up to the brunette's small face; gently pinching the flushed skin on his cheek, then rubbing over it with icy fingers. The boy held his hand firmly against his cheek, squeezing his eyes shut as he focused on the feeling of the blonde's skin against his. He knew the tears escaped when the elder began to remove them softly with the pads of his fingers. With a deep shaky breath, he opened his eyes only to see that the blonde inched closer to his quivering form. Matching tears raced down the man's plump face; coating his colorless lips.

The brunette smiled as his thumb caressed the man's bottom lip; wiping the tears away. Their eyes met as a sob wracked throughout the blonde's body. Curling into the broader man's chest as arms were instantly secured around the sobbing boy; comforting him. Tears soaked into his shirt as he ran a soothing hand down his friend's prominent spine. A moment passed and the blonde slowly calmed down, a soft sniffle escaping every now and then. Pulling the blanket tighter around the fragile man, his eyes were hooded as they followed the constellations. Space would soon appear in the sky where his best friend's home would be for eternity. However, the thought of the shivering man not having a place to himself didn't settle well within him.

They didn't deserve to share the same sky as the man cradled in his arms. His soul was too pure to live amongst them. The one whose heart welcomed him with open arms when no one else wanted to play with him on the playground; giving his food to the doe-eyed boy knowing that he barely ate at home. Their friendship blossomed into something utterly beautiful over the years they had spent together. They were each other's rock, the one calm place amongst the storm. He couldn't bear to imagine life without him.

If anything, it should be him carrying the disease; destroying him into nothing. He deserves this, not the one carrying it. Not in a million years should he have ever had to suffer. He felt sick at the thought of getting to live out the rest of his life when the blonde wouldn't be there to enjoy it with him. It disgusted him to think that out of the two of them, he was perfectly fine, and his best friend was dying. At that moment, he had never wished to take something from the man more in his life than this. To be selfish just one last time.

He deserved so much more than a ball of gas in the sky. Even at this moment the elder was still positive; telling the boy that he would be able to watch over him for the rest of his days until he could one day join him. How could he even continue living once the only person that he had ever cared for was gone? When he had lashed out screaming how it wasn't fair and cursing the universe for sending the man into his life only to take him away, the blonde simply put his hand over the boy's heart and told him that he would always be with him. Even in his moments of selfishness, he still cared for him.

He mumbled the man's name receiving a small huff of air in acknowledgment. Reaching up, the younger pressed a button; watching as the sunroof closed. The night sky slowly dissipated from his view as he turned his focus to the man in his arms. A forced smile carved its way onto his lips as his eyes memorized the man's delicate features one last time.

He whispered as a single tear escaped, flowing down his cheek, "You're the only star that matters."