Law's Ultimatum

*CHK CHK*

One the two toys were inside an abandoned home on the outskirts of the city, the one legged toy soldier trained his rifle on Rock'em Sock'em. "I have some questions for you."

If Rock'em Sock'em could change his sock expression, he'd look amused and exasperated. The toy soldier seemed to understand regardless, as he lowered his toy gun shortly after.

"Go on then. I've got questions of my own, too." Rock'em Sock'em said.

"Why did they turn you into a toy?" The tin soldier asked.

"I came here to investigate and sabotage Doflamingo in any way that I could. In hindsight, I suppose I shouldn't have come alone, as that didn't go so well for me the last time I did that…" Rock'em Sock'em said regretfully.

"You came to Dressrosa on a ship?" The tin soldier asked.

"Yes-" Rock'em Sock'em started before he was interrupted by the tin soldier. "And can you sail that ship alone?"

"I, well… no…?" Rock'em Sock'em said in confusion.

"You didn't come alone. You just forgot, just like how everyone has forgotten you." The tin soldier said with sympathy.

Rock'em Sock'em was silent for a moment and studied the tin soldier, as if trying to read his expressionless, tin face. "Well, shit…"

"How did you escape?" The tin soldier asked, getting back to business.

"I had gotten a lead about a secret facility I could destroy to hurt Doflamingo, but it was a trap. Several of his officers were there waiting for me. I fended them off fairly well for a while, or I guess WE did, that makes more sense actually. Then that little girl slapped me and I went all weak. She told me my name was 'Rock'em Sock'em' just as I mustered enough strength to rush towards the window and break it. She grabbed my sock tail and I stabbed her with a bit of broken glass to the neck, then leapt out the window." Rock'em Sock'em narrated his daring escape. "I remember there being several other toys in the room, she must have been picking us off one by one with none of us being the wiser…"

"Don't blame yourself for leaving them behind. Even my own daughter has forgotten me." The tin soldier tried to reassure the sock monkey, but Rock'em Sock'em's clenched sock fists told him his words weren't much comfort.

"What about you then, tin man? What's your story?" Rock'em Sock'em changed the subject.

The tin soldier hesitated, but decided it was only fair. "My story begins many years ago, before that demon Doflamingo came to Dressrosa…"

The tin soldier regaled Rock'em Sock'em of his tale. The happy memories, the sad ones, and the horrors too. By the end, Rock'em Sock'em was sobbing, or at least he was trying to do so as best as he could without tear ducts.

"You're a good guy, tin man! You're a good father too, no matter how you claim otherwise!" Rock'em Sock'em almost shouted.

"Quiet down!" The tin soldier shushed. "You'll get us caught if you're so loud, I'm a fugitive toy as well. And just call me Thunder Soldier of Rage, that's what everyone else calls me."

"That's too long, I won't remember it." Rock'em Sock'em complained. "I'll just call you Thunder Thigh."

Thunder Soldier of Rage just gaped at the audacity of the sock monkey in front of him, before deciding to just let it go. He had suffered far more humiliation than a bad nickname over the past 10 years and he needed all the allies he could get.

"In any case, you should have guessed how lucky you were to escape from Sugar when you did. If she had given you any orders, you would have become a slave at the mercy of Doflamingo forever." Thunder Soldier of Rage explained. "The question is, will you resign yourself to waiting until someone else saves you, if that should ever come to pass, or will you fight to save yourself?"

"I ain't sitting around and waiting for someone to get me out of my own mess. Especially since anybody who might have come looking for me remembers me, right?" Rock'em Sock'em said resolutely.

"Perfect! First things first, we need to get you accustomed to your new body and see how much strength we can draw out of it. Don't expect much from it though, as even my tin body is pathetic, let alone your sock body."

…

A little ways offshore of Punk Hazard.

Doflamingo was soaring through the air at high speeds when he spotted a raft in the ocean. Dropping down to land on it, his mouth formed into a deep frown at the sight before his eyes.

Vergo and Monet's severed heads sat chained to a wooden board atop the raft. Monet looked thoroughly ashamed of herself toward Doflamingo whilst Vergo had a placid expression on his bloodied face. Both had the word LOSER scrawled on their foreheads.

They would have immediately explained the circumstances of their current state and of their failure if they didn't have ball gags in their mouths preventing them from doing so.

A timed explosive device was burning away at its long fuses before Doflamingo stamped them out.

"Look who dropped in for a visit. Did you come to pick up your subordinates from their play date?" Law said through the den den mushi.

"Law." Doflamingo said with barely disguised menace in his tone. "It's been a long time. I don't know whether to be surprised at this sudden attack on my people or not. Was that your girlfriend on the broadcast? I'd like to meet her sometime…"

"No, she isn't, but I do have your boyfriend here with me-" Law said before Caesar's voice came crashing through the den den mushi. "Joker, you have to save me-!"

"Where are Vergo and Monet's bodies?" Doflamingo asked with surprising patience.

"We'll get to that, for now… let's make a deal." Law suggested, though his tone made it clear this would be an ultimatum.

"What, you think because you got a fancy title from the World Government that you can come sit at the grown up table?" Doflamingo asked condescendingly.

"Why don't you ask Vergo how seriously you should take this offer?" Law said mysteriously.

Doflamingo unsnapped the buckle on the ball gag in Vergo's mouth, which somehow got stuck in his beard immediately. Vergo wasted no time to tell his young master what he wanted to know. "Harpin D. Cherry and the rest of the Straw Hats."

"Fuck." Doflamingo swore.

"That's right, you're fucked." Law said, clearly relishing the rare break in Doflamingo's calm facade. "But we won't need to lift a finger against you, since Kaido will do all the dirty work for us. He won't be happy if he finds out you can't make any more SMILEs for him."

Even the small ocean's waves seemed to fall silent enough to hear a pin drop in the moment that followed.

"What do you want, Law? What do I need to do to get Caesar back?" Doflamingo spat angrily.

"Resign from the Shichibukai and give up your throne. Throw away all that you've built in the last ten years and become an ordinary pirate again. I'll await your decision in the morning newspaper." *Click* Law hung up.

Doflamingo looked ready to explode in rage. Law didn't even allow a chance to negotiate, which made him all the more frustrated.

"I'm sorry, young master. It's my fault." Vergo spoke softly, whilst Monet groaned into her ball gag in an attempt to accept some of the responsibility for their failure as well.

Doflamingo walked over and released Monet's ball gag, but put a finger against her lips to prevent her from spewing apologies at him.

"Don't apologize. That beast on Straw Hat's crew alone would have been enough to thwart you. You did the best you could have." Doflamingo's voice was gentle, a rarity even when in private among his most trusted subordinates.

Monet started to cry because she knew it wasn't true. She should have contacted her young master the moment she realized the Straw Hats were on Punk Hazard, there had been more than enough time to do so. Even Vergo had a single, manly tear streak down his face, then get stuck in his beard.