130 Planning after death

Mahmoud Schahed/Dial

After meeting with Jen's dad and having him consider arresting me, I would have liked to have had a chance to just relax. But I'd made a promise to myself to continue making plans for the worst.

There was a lot of plans I'd put in place for the future. I had a cheat code to the universe after all and I used it for everything. Years of comic book and sci-fi knowledge let me know what sort of threats I might have to prepare for, and I wasn't willing to simply sit around and let it happen. Maria and Fury had a thousand files on everything I could remember. Granted, I kept using the dimensional viewer as the explanation for why I knew everything. Didn't know how long that lie was going to last.

The point was, I had plans. Plans of everything from different weapons I'd created and hung in an armory of my own making, contingencies, even a list of what possible alternate universes we might end up fighting.

But I hadn't thought much about what might happen if I died. If someone smart or strong or reality shattering enough to overcome the Omnitrix managed to take a shot at me. It could happen. So I had to do something.

I had to tell the truth to someone I could trust to keep my secrets.

With those thoughts in my mind, I entered my lab. Well, Jury Rigg's lab. The little red psycho had left his mark on the large space Tony had given me, the stack of energy drink cans left in every recycling bin in the room being proof of that.

Inside the lab stood X. The large robotic shell he'd created for himself was pretty much dominating the center of the room. He was standing patiently, wearing a pair of jeans as always. I wasn't sure why he likes wearing jeans so much while forgoing any other clothes, but I suppose it wasn't an issue for him.

"Thanks for coming X," I walked up and pulled out a chair, one I'd asked for in case one of the heavier members of the team came in. Between Hulk, Jen, Thor, and X now, all four of whom weighed hundreds of pounds more than a normal person at the lowest, I'd figured I might need it. As X settled in the chair, I pulled out one for myself and sat across from him.

"I'm always at your disposal sir," X said. "Though I will admit, I'm multitasking. I'm currently gaming with Jarvis, checking police reports, and tracking human trafficking on the Dark Web."

I had gotten used to the fact that both my AI allies tended to be damn good at that sort of thing. Still, the last one worried me enough to distract me. "Need any help with that? I don't mind breaking some legs."

"You have nothing to worry about," X's blue eyes narrowed and turned, his way of making a smile. "Right now I reckon I just need to find a way to track the less technologically inclined sorts. But we've made a lot of headway. And you already helped with the financing."

"I did?" I asked, surprised. "I gave you only half my money!"

"And then I put that money into investments. I've got a real eye for the market," he said with amusement in his voice. "Jarvis and I have been using that money to support our efforts. But I imagine that isn't what you wanted to talk about."

I gently put the thought of that in the corner of my mind. I was always looking for more ways to help people and doing it internationally had never held me back before. Well, not since international travel became so much cheaper thanks to a combination of space aliens and personal super-jets.

"Can you… make sure we aren't being listened to? By anyone?" I asked.

"Of course," X's eyes flared blue for just a moment. "There ya go, sir."

"Thanks. I uh," I coughed into my hand as I got my thoughts in order. "Lately, I've been thinking... about my death."

X's body was usually pretty still, but I noticed this time that he didn't even try to simulate a response. No widened eyes, no twitching fingers. He just stared at me. "Oh," he said after a long moment.

Feeling extremely uncomfortable, I continued speaking. "Yeah… It'll happen, one day. And the truth is, if anyone has a chance of outliving me, it's you. I mean, Thor probably will. Same with Jen, Bruce, maybe even Steve. But you? You might be immortal. And if you are… you could end up helping my kids."

I hated this. Hated thinking so far ahead. But I had to. Had to think of the future, and all the dangers it held.

"Maybe that won't happen. Maybe I'll die long before that can happen. Maybe I'll just never have kids for some reason. But I can't depend on 'maybe'. I have to plan for everything. And really, I just want someone to know. So that they can keep fighting if I'm gone."

X still didn't move. "You have something to tell me?"

"A secret, of sorts," I looked at him in the eyes. "X, I've been lying for months. To everyone. About where I come from. Why I know what I know. I'm not just from another world, another universe. And I have to explain it all. Not just to get it out of my brain. But if I die… I want someone to be able to tell my family. I can't. I've tried to do it, but nothing has worked. And if it happens before I can tell the team a-and Jen, Nat, and Creel, I want them to know the truth."

I took a deep shuddering breath. This little secret wasn't the worst in the world. But the thought of dying without anyone

"...Sir," X said softly. "What is the secret?"

"...When I was about… I don't know, 15? It was right before Christmas. On Cartoon Network, a western cartoon channel, a show called Ben 10 appeared. It was pretty awesome. Granted, the main character was 10, so I thought it was for little kids. But I watched it anyways. Became a big fan. The kid had an alien watch. One he used to turn into different aliens to fight against evil."

"The Omnitrix," X's voice had lost some of it's personality. That's how I knew he was really thinking, when he stopped emulating humanity as well. "It comes from a fictional world?"

"No. The world is real. Just… separate from mine. I have a theory about my world. I think it's almost at the center of the rest of the multiverse. That it, and worlds in a similar position, have an unconscious link to every other universe. So people from those can see the rest of the universes. Those come out like… imagination. Inspiration. And the more your brain is set for creativity, the more open you are to the rest of the multiverse."

I smirked.

"Or we are literally creating universes without meaning to from every random thought in our heads."

"What are you telling me, sir?" X asked.

"Ben 10 and the Omnitrix aren't the only things that were considering fictional properties in my world. So were Iron Man, Black Widow, Jarvis, HYDRA… they were in all sorts of media. But they all started as comic book properties."

"...Even me?" X asked.

"No. In all the multiverse, as far as I know? You are unique to yourself. I've never heard of anyone with your origin in particular, which is most likely do to my actions."

X nodded slowly, the first hint that he had taken in everything I'd said and added it to his databanks, analyzed it, and got over it. "Unique… I like that. But it does sound lonely."

"Nah," I said with a shrug. "Humans are all unique too, in big and little ways. But we can still find ways to connect with each other. Besides," I grinned at him. "The comics have a lot of AI. Good and bad ones alike."

"That is gratifying," X said, eyes opening and closing. "Sir, I won't let you die."

"...You can't stop it," I said sadly.

"I will," he said firmly.

I opened and closed my mouth before sighing. "I don't mind you trying. But if I do die, as in nothing short of magic or tech can save, let me go."

He recoiled. "What?!"

"...Humanity being immortal is a nice idea. But I don't want that for myself. Death gives my actions meaning. If I lived forever, I'd just… I don't mind the idea of living a long time. 100, hey, maybe even 200 years if we do some cool shit with medicine. But I don't want eternity, X. I want to be able to have context in my life, if that makes sense? I don't want to be in the middle of my millionth war counting up casualties and barely getting affected by them, or looking around a room of people and not feeling anything because what's the point in relationships when you live eternally? I mean, for humans, time feels shorter the older we get. By the time I'm a thousand, a fifty-year friendship will be like a guy I waved to in a hall once. I don't want that. Don't want the things that come with being alive to have no meaning."

I thought of a way to explain my reasoning before deciding on something.

"…There's a saying I like that… well, I don't know where it comes from but I found on a Gurren Lagaan AMV's comments."

"I enjoyed that anime," X said.

"It's a favorite… The comment said 'When does someone die? When he's shot? No. When he's stabbed? No. when he's sick? No! A man truly dies when he's forgotten!' … I looked up the quote again before I came here. To make sure I had it right. That is the only immortality I want."

I got the impression X didn't understand what I was talking about. I decided to move on, knowing that I might have been alone in my thoughts on immortality. Maybe the older I get, the more my thoughts would change on it. But right now that was where I was at.

"Well, I need to tell you a lot, X," I leaned over to rest my elbows on my knees, steepling my fingers together and resting my chin against them, taking the classic 'Gendo pose'. Needed a pair of glasses to complete the look. "First, I want to tell you my life story. As much as I can remember. Is that okay?"

"Of course," X still sounded disturbed, but he nodded anyway. "Go ahead."

"Kay… I was born in Oakland, California, on November the 2nd, 19…"

I told him as much as I could, trying to pack it all in. First, my life story, for sentimental reasons. If I died, I wanted someone to remember me. To know I was here. That I'd done something with my life.

Then I spoke of other things. Of the Marvel Comics, as much as I could remember of them, rambling at times as I went on random tangents. I needed someone to have as much of my memories as possible. If I was gone, any piece of information could save lives. I had already begun making files, but X now knew they weren't just something I'd seen from a dimensional viewer.

That was the trick of it. Because I spoke of my world. I told him as much as I could. So that, if the worst happened, X could begin work on reaching it. Not just to tell my family what happened but also to buy comics, movies, everything and anything. This Marvel universe would be prepared for any threat, even if I wasn't around to warn them. They had to be.

I don't want to die. But I accept that it's possible.

Didn't mean I'd make it easy